"I can't believe it!"

Padabog na nilagay ko ang bawat reports sa lamesa ko ngayon. The meeting has ended and as usual he was the star of the show! Ano pa nga ba ang magagawa ko. Hindi ko na rin maalis siya sa kompanya. And the worst thing about it? He is now moving his company in Italy! Damn it!

Mabilis ko lang din na kinain ang dalwang chocolates na nasa purse ko. Nakasanayan ko na ito. Ito ang nagsisilbing calming medicine ko. Ang kumain ng chocolate kapag stress ako sa trabaho.

What the hell? Sinadya ba 'to ni Daddy? Ni kuya Enrico? Nilang lahat? Pinaglalaruan 'ata nila ako! Dad knew it and they all knew this! That Ethan's father is Lachie Henderson! Damn it!

Kaya sa sobrang inis ko ay tinawagan ko na si Daddy ngayon. Ilang ring pa ito bago niya sinagot. Alam na niya siguro kung ano ang magiging reklamo ko.

"Dad? Ba't hindi mo sinabi, Dad?" Napamura pa ako sa telephone sa kanya.

"I know you'll be furious, hija. But I didn't accept him because of who he was to you and to Ethan. Magaling siya sa negosyo at alam kong magagamit ko siya ng husto. He knows how to build an empire in a quick span. Kaya kinuha ko ang kompanya nila, Faith," sa boung boses ni Daddy.

Napapikitmata na ako at nagkakagulo na ang takbo ng puso ko. Ang sarap sumigaw pero nagpipigil ako.

"Did the two of you meet? Amber told me that he holds the Island project there on our property with Tadeo."

I sighed heavily. "Yes, we did, Dad..."

"And did he see, Ethan?"

Natahimik ako sa tanong niya.

"Well, you don't have to tell me because I know what happened there, hija. I think he probably knew that Ethan is his son. They have the same features and I would say the same brain."

I rolled my eyes while listening to my father. I can't believe that his giving him credits after all! What's the point of asking me? If he already knows the answer. Nakakaloka ang ama ko!

"Dad, how long do I have to hold this project? I can't wait to be home, "reklamo ko.

"Bakit? Why? Is it because of Lachie? Don't be, hija. Where did the business mindset of my darling Faith? That's very unprofessional? And besides, hija, you are with Paul. Let me remind you of that. In the future, Ethan will soon know and will ask. Malalaman at malalaman ng bata ito. At ano? Ilalayo mo?"

"Dad. . ." padabog ko.

"Don't be, anak. I've been through that and it's like living in hell. Alam mo naman siguro ang nangyari sa akin 'di ba?" boung boses niya.

I swallowed hard while looking at the sky above me. Dad was a secret agent before, and he was on a dangerous mission. Iyong katumbas ng buhay mo ang misyon niya at natalo siya. They all want him gone. Ito lang din ang paraan noon para mabuhay si Lolo at Mommy. He chooses to end his life to save the people that he loves the most.

Hindi nga niya alam na buntis si Mommy noon kay Ate Fenella. Then he told us that for the past four years of his non-existence, he was looking at Mom and Fenella from afar. Wala siyang nagawa at hindi siya puwedeng magpakita. It's like living in hell while watching your loved ones grow to the thought that you're good as dead.

Until it was safe for him to return. Tito Avery Blumer has to change his identity and everything. He was no longer Logan Finn Turner-Mondragon because he is now Tim Smith.

"Dad-"

"Faith. . . I know how painful the past was for you, hija. And probably it is still more painful even now that Ethan is involved. As a father, learn to forgive, Faith. That's the only way you can be free and be happy. . . Mahal kita anak, mahal na mahal ko kayo ni Ethan. Ikaw pa rin ang nag-iisang baby ko. Te Amo. . ."

"Ti voglio bene anche io papa. I love you too."

"Always remember that I am proud of you, hija."

Natapos na ang pag-uusap namin at mas gumaan na ang pakiramadam ko. Dad always have his words of wisdom to me. Every time I heard it from him it gives me relaxing feeling and I always feels better. He was right. In order to be happy you have to freely forgive the other person. I have to think of Ethan. Pero nahihirapan pa din ako, at hindi ko alam kong paano ko ito ipapaliwanag sa anak ko.

I will just let everything go on its own accord. . .

THE past two days of working was like a mess for me! Araw-araw ko nakikita ang pagmumukha niya at naiinis akong lalo sa kanya. He always shows his soft and affectionate spot towards me. Hindi ko kailangan ito dahil nahihirapan lang din ako. But he never asked for Ethan at all. Naiintindihan na niya siguro ang lahat. Mas mabuti sana kung hihinto na siya, para matapos na ang lahat ng gulo.

That's what I thought. . .

Maaga akong nakauwi at naabutan ko pa na nagluluto si Yaya Nyeha. I asked for Ethan straight away. Nasa rooftop daw ang bata at kasama si Yaya Fe. I took my time and changed myself. Nitong mga nagdaang araw at gabie ay panay na ang bonding namin mag-ina. I read him stories before going to bed and we had our little fun time together. Ethan loves it!

Although I noticed a lot about his dinosaurs which is always with him all the time. At kahit pa sa pagtulog ay kasama at kayakap niya ito. Hindi na nga ito nag-iisa dahil dalawa na sila na magkatabi nito sa kama. Kinuha ko pa ito at tinitigan lang din. May maliit na mensahi naman sa maliit na name tag nito sa gilid.

Ethan,

I love you to the moon and back.

Dad

My heart melted in an instant and my guilt is eating me alive. Nilapag ko na ito pabalik sa kama at nilingon na ang oras dito. It's nearly five o'clock and probably Ethan and Yaya Fe will be back soon. Nang makalabas sa kwarto ay naihanda na ni Yaya ang lamesa, at tinatapos na lang niya ang huling niluto.

"I'll go get Ethan, Yaya," paalam ko.

I was about to shut the front door when I heard their noises. Ang inggay na tawa ng anak ko ang naririnig ko ngayon. Bumagsak na ang panga ko sa sahig nang makita silang dalawa. Naka-piggy back ride na si Ethan sa Ama niya habang nakasunod naman si Yaya Fe sa likod. Pero imbes na magalit ay parang natunaw lang ang puso ko sa kanilang dalawa.

They're full of giggles and laughter. Ethan was almost on top of him, climbing around his shoulder. Lachie holds Ethan hands tightly and I know he is careful not to drop him. Napangiti ako nang konti habang pinagmamasdan silang palapit sa kinatatayuan ko ngayon. Nasa harapan pa ako ng pinto ng condo unit.

"Are you ready to see what's inside?" sa siglang boses ni Lachie sa bata.

"Yes, daddy! I am so excited!" si Ethan sa kanya.

Nawala ang ngiti sa labi ko ng marinig ko ang tawag ni Ethan sa kanya. Daddy? Damn it! How did. . .

The two of them both stopped when they saw me. Nawala agad ang ngiti sa labi ni Lachie nang mapako ang mga mata niya sa akin ngayon.

"Mommy!" ang boses ni Ethan.

Maingat niyang ibinaba si Ethan mula sa pagkakarga nito. Tumakbo agad si Ethan sa akin para yakapin ako.

"I miss you, Mommy!"

"I miss you too, baby. Did you have fun?"

Imbes na kay Ethan ako tumitig ay kay Lachie na ako ngayon napatitig ng husto. He's already standing right in front of me. Huh, great! Pati ba naman dito ay sinusundan pa niya ako? Sobrang toxic na nga sa trabaho dahil ang mukha niya ang palaging nakikita ko, at hanggang dito pa talaga!

"Mom, can I just get inside Daddy's Lachie house?"

Napakurap na ako sa harap ng bata. Hindi ko tuloy alam kong ano ang pinagsasabi niya. Hanggang sa tumitig na ako kay Lachie ngayon.

"Cool. . . We were playing Daddy dinosaurs. And I am the Daddy and he is our baby," sa lambing na ngiti ni Lachie sa akin.

Tumaas na ang kilay ko, at napangiwi pa ako sa kanya. I was about to say something but he cuts me off before I could even start a conversation.

"I live here. Just next door to you," turo ng mga mata niya sa pinto.

Nanlaki na ang mga mata ko, at wala na naman akong iba pang masabi ngayon.

"Mommy don't you know that Daddy Lach's house is very cool. And I even have my bedroom too! I can't wait to see the surprise! Come on Daddy, open the door!" utos ni Ethan sa kanya.

"Hang on, baby. We will aske Mom's permission first okay?" Sabay haplos niya sa buhok ni Ethan at nakatitig lang din siya sa akin.

Nagpabalik-balik pa ang tingin ko sa kanilang dalawa at kinabahan na. Until I nodded. In the end, wala rin akong nagawa... Ang hirap naman kasi tangihan ang damdamin ng bata. Lumawak agad ang ngiti niya at agad na napahawak ng gusto kay Lachie. Tumalikod silang dalawa at binuksan na ni Lachie and pinti ng condo niya.

I don't know what else to say. Is it right to say that everything is fallen into coincidence? At naging kabitbahay ko lang din diya? Hmph! Nakakaloka.

.

C.M.LOUDEN/Vbomshell