Cold.

Wet.

Bo was suffocating from having the water entering his lungs; he was struggling for breath. Despite the fact that it was his intention to drown himself to the bottom of the steam and ended his miserable life, the human instinct for survival still kicked in fast. His arms and legs were thrashing, splashing the water, causing bubbles to encircle his body. Nevertheless, Bo suppressed the survival instinct and closed his eyes, letting go of everything.

And it worked.

Bo could no longer register anything around him. No more coldness. No more wetness. No more struggle.

Everything was calm and peaceful. 

A white ceiling came into view when Bo's eyelids upheaved, unveiling the darkness from his vision. Though it might be the same color as the ceiling in his house, this one was newer. It was cleaner and different.

"This can't be heaven, can it?" he asked himself in a hoarse voice, eyes still fixated on the ceiling.

"No," a deep, gentle voice answered Bo's rhetorical question.

Bo's eyes widened, and he began to look around. The moment he tilted his head to the right 一where the door was一 he saw an unfamiliar figure in a faded blue jean and a white T-shirt walking inside, carrying a small tray with a bowl of something that smelled like chicken porridge.

The man seemed to be a few inches taller than him but not that much older. Only when he came closer did Bo realize how gorgeous the guy was. His raven hair was down, covering the narrow forehead just above his thick eyebrows with a pair of deep-set brown eyes underneath. His cherry lips had the color of a healthy, natural red shade that complimented his white-skinned tone and oval face-shaped, uniquely when it was adorned by a cute mole just under the left lower lip.

"Who are you? What're you doing here?" asked Bo once the man came to a stop next to the bed.

"I'm your saver, and what I'm doing is saving your life," answered the man with a stern face, "And this is my house, so I don't think I need to explain to you what exactly I'm doing inside this building."

Bo brought his lips to shut and turned his head away. The thought that he was still alive did not bring him any joy. It contradicted all his intents and purposes.

"The name is Sean, by the way."

"I don't care," said Bo impertinently, before he turned his head back to face the man named Sean, "Why did you do it?"

"huh?" Sean arched his eyebrow at the sudden question.

"Who gave you the right to save me?"

"I'm a doctor. I save lives."

"Then go and save the lives of those who want to live! Why bother saving me when I don't even have the will to live? Are all doctors nosy like you?!"

Sean narrowed his eyes at the Bo and put down the tray he held on the nearby table. Then, he crossed his arms around his chest and said in a somber tone.

"I don't know about other doctors, but yes, I've always been this nosy. I can't stand someone with perfect body-shape, handsome face, and usable limps like you disparaging your precious lives as if it's worth nothing."

Bo sat bolt upright on the bed immediately, ignoring the dizziness that swept up to his head at the sudden movement and glared at Sean right after the latter finished talking.

"Who are you to judge? You don't know a single thing about me. You don't know how bad my life is."

With a shrug, Sean replied calmly, "Yeah, I don't know anything about you. Care to tell me?"

"Why should I even bother with that?"

"Fine, then don't tell me. You're nothing but a spoiled brat anyway. At first, I didn't want to judge the book by its cover, but it looks like my assumption isn't wrong."

Bo was filled with rage at the sarcasm. Not only was this man nosy, but he was also ill-mannered. Bo could not believe how a man with such an attitude could obtain a medical license. Did morality not taken these days seriously?

"YOU!" he exclaimed, shooting up to his feet as soon as his adrenaline led him. In just a second, he was face to face with the very person he wanted to confront, hand raised in the air, preparing to punch Sean in the face. However, the fist was never got to land, for his thin wrist was wrapped inside a warm, big palm of Sean.

"LET GO OF ME!" Bo yelled and tried to break away from the firm grip but failed.

It was hard to believe that even though the two had similar body frames, Sean was more powerful than him. It made Bo feel inferior, although both of them were males. The fact that he was shorter and weaker made Bo feel extremely frustrated that his eyes involuntarily generated a type of liquid known as tears.

Why am I so useless in everything? Everywhere that I go, I can only hear and see the word 'fail'! Bo scolded himself within his head.

Strength began to crawl away from the shorter's body as the negative thought took over, leaving Bo to stop struggling and going weak in the knees. He would have slid down to the floor if it were not for Sean, who used his free hand to encircle his waist and brought the small frame into his broad chest for a balance. The hand that grabbed Bo's wrist finally let go and was tenderly patting the shivering back that was quivering due to hiccoughs and sniffs instead.

"it's okay. Just cry your heart out. Don't hold back. I'm here for you," Sean said in a soft voice as he buried his chin into the silky strand of Bo's hair.

Whether it was the sweet voice or the comfortable, warm embrace, Bo did not know. For now, he could no longer weigh out any thinking or reason. He just needed a shoulder to cry on. However, Sean did more than only offering his shoulder; he offered his broad chest and a hug. Additionally, he was also proffering a safety feeling that pacified every bit of negativity and malaise within Bo's body.

No words were exchanged for a short while, and the whole room was silent except for the sounds of breath drawing and sniffing. Sean patiently stood still and let Bo shed tears into his shirt without caring about the stains afterward. His hands continued making their ways up and down the shorter's back affectionately, trying his best to make sure the latter felt comforted.

When Bo seemed to calm down, Sean broke away and helped him sit back down on the bed before shoving his hand inside his pocket and taking out the clean, white handkerchief.

"Feeling better now?" Sean asked while handing the muckender to Bo, " Mr...," he trailed off when he realized he had not gotten to know the name of the person he had rescued yet.

"Bo," said Bo, in a voice that was only slightly louder than a whisper, but Sean was able to hear it anyway, "Just Bo."

"Bo..." Sean repeated the name that sounded so right when coming out from his lips. He did not know why, but he found this name very beautiful, just like the person who bore it.

"It's a beautiful name," he could not help but blur it out, making Bo look up from under his damp, tear-stained eyelashes with a face as red as newly bloom rose.

"Um...thank you," Bo's voice came out weaker than intended. Shyness seemed to be overhauling, making him act like someone he was not, especially under the taller's eyes, who kept staring at him without either blinking or changing direction for even a mere second.

Sean's lips then curved up into a smile; he subconsciously lifted his hand to brush the wet locks away from Bo's smooth forehead. In doing so, his fingertips brushed against the white skin, causing the receiving end to shiver slightly.

"Don't mention it," said Sean as he peered into Bo's eyes, with nothing but gentleness deriving from the bottom of his heart.

Bo sucked in a breath at the ethereal sight before him, making his lungs almost burst due to the excessive storing of oxygen that needed release. His heart kept palpitating from the left side of his chest as if someone was playing a rock and roll drum-kit from inside there whenever his eyes and the taller's brown ones met. As a man himself, Bo knew he should not find the one standing before him titillating, but he could not help it. His body reacted on its own, denying every sensible reason he tried to bargain with it. Afraid that his body was showing off more abnormal reactions, Bo decided to be the first to break eye contact, hoping it would somehow calm him down.

"Also," Bo wanted to say something to divert his attention from the one before him. His eyes were now landing on Sean's feet, to which he caught sight of a pair of dark-green slippers, his favorite color.

Bo could not understand whether it was mere coincidence or intentional, but everything about Sean kept leaving a deep impression on him in a way that he could not explain. It was something new to him because Bo had never felt this way before, even with his ex-fiance back then. The feeling was genuinely foreign.

"Yes?" Sean asked when Bo did not get to finish his sentence.

Clearing his throat, Bo tried to finish where he had left off, "well, also, I'm sorry for throwing a fit at you earlier. I mean, you took the effort to help fish me out of the water and brought me here, so to react that way, it was totally rude of me. I apologize for that."

A soft chuckle echoed inside the room as the sound wave escaped from the cherry lips of the person standing. Hooking the slender fingers under Bo's chin, Sean lifted the incarnadine face to meet his.

"Don't mention that, either. I'm more than happy to be the one who withstands your rant and the one to calm you down, Bo."

As a psychiatrist, Sean had said this phrase to countless numbers of his patients before; nevertheless, this was the first time that a new type of ardor transpired when he told them. Those might be the same words, but the sentiment surely was different. It was a feeling of wanting more than just the usual paid consultant. A kind of devotion that drove Sean to want to involve himself in everything related to Bo. Not just for a short moment, but a whole lifetime ahead.

Bo had no choice but to peer back into the taller's eyes since Sean refused to let go of his chin. He kept staring until he could almost memorize every structure, starting from the scleras to the pupils and the Irises of the enchanting corneas around Sean's eyes area.

Just when Bo thought they would be spending the rest of the day staring at each other, the scene changed. Everything happened at lightning speed that Bo was caught entirely off guard. The pulchritudinous pair of eyes that he had been staring at seemed to make their way lower and closer to his own vision, that he did not have time to register what was going on until he felt something wet and warm atop his lips. The brown pupil was long gone, replaced by the fluttering eyelashes that were pricking his cheekbones at the proximity.

Sean placed his soft tiers on Bo's closed lips, but he didn't make any move. It was like experimenting by testing whether permission or denial would be granted. If Bo shoved him away, the result would be the latter; Sean would then step away and apologize for his behavior. But if the plump lips parted, it would mean he was given access to take this action to the next level, to which he would gladly comply.

In contrast to the hushed room, the sounds of two fast-beating hearts reverberated throughout the whole space as the two lips connected. Bo was still widening his eyes, oscillating between bewilderment and astonishment. He had no idea what or why this was happening. Be that as it may, there was one thing he was sure.

He did not want just this.

I want more, Bo thought to himself.

At the thought, he parted his lips as an invitation to which Sean did not hesitate to accept. The taller began to move his soft tiers between Bo's cakeholes and maneuvered them skillfully as if to outline the detailed structure of the rosy, plump lips before his. The intertwining of the two lips started gently before evolving hastily as if they were in a hurry, siphoning each other's saliva like bees extracting nectar from flowers. There was no tongue involved in the kiss; however, it was hot enough as it was since the two angelic faces almost mingled into one.

No one knew for how long did the two prolong their sweet moments, but just like he was the initiator, Sean broke the kiss first before pulling his head far away enough to make Bo's face become the center of his focus.

"You're a good kisser, Bo. I can't help but compliment you," said Sean with a big smile.

"I don't think a compliment is necessary," said Bo shyly; his face was still hot and blushing from the makeout session, "you're not bad either."

"Hmm...let's says we're equal then," chuckled Sean. However, he stopped when he realized Bo was not mirroring his action.

"Are you mad, Bo?" asked Sean with a peccant countenance on his face.

Bo was quite surprised at the unexpected question. "Mad?" he asked, looking up at the taller in perplexing.

"Yeah, about me kissing you," Sean asked straightforwardly, making Bo's face turn a shade redder.

"I should, shouldn't I? But weirdly, I'm not mad at all."

Instead of shying away as he had been, Bo peered into Sean's eyes as he answered this, notwithstanding the fact that his face was no different than a ripe tomato.

A wide smile once again found its way to the taller's face at Bo's answer.

"No, it's not weird at all. There are many things in this world that theory can't explain," said Sean as he patted Bo's head gently as a father did.

Bo gave him a weak smile in return.

"However, I don't believe there is any problem in this world that doesn't have a solution, Bo," Sean continued, "and you know what? I'm more than happy to be the one who helps you to seek out the resolution. Even if you don't let me in now, I'll be patiently waiting. No matter how long it takes, I'll stay right by your side until you're comfortable enough to open up to me."

"But...why?" asked Bo; his eyes twinkled from the moistness of unshed tears, "Why would you be willing to waste your time with me?"

"Ssh..." Sean placed his index finger on the trembling plump lips to cut Bo off from saying more. When the latter stopped, he moved his digit up until his thumb came to replace his index finger, brushing the soft tiers' contour affectionately.

"The time we enjoy is not the time wasted. The same applies when I am with you."

Bo was no longer able to control his emotion, for his tears began to roll down his pale cheeks at the taller's words, but they were not able to make their ways to the jawline since they were brushed away by Sean's slender fingers, failing to leave behind stains on the beautiful face.

"But you don't know how badly ill I am. Once you know, you may change your mind," said Bo with a croaky voice as he tried to overcome the lump on his throat.

Sean's face was indifferent as he uttered in a dulcet tone.

"Try me."

When Bo decided to confide, Sean sat on the bed next to him and interlaced their fingers, occasionally squeezing the shorter's hand in comfort when he choked on his tears. He listened attentively to the brief narration of the illness Bo had gone through and what had driven Bo to commit suicide. However, he did not know the story earlier than this since Bo had a partial memory loss to the event before he moved to live in the small bungalow.

Once Bo finished talking, Sean helped to dab the tears away before directing Bo's head to lean on his shoulder and stroked his back soothingly.

"My father had to go through a lot of terrible hardships because of my existence alone. I'm too ashamed even to face him now. I just wanted to do one thing for him by disappearing from his life forever. I'm such a failure," said Bo.

"My angel, this is where you're wrong. You're not a failure," said Sean as he tilted his head to place a smooch on Bo's forehead resting on his shoulder, "but you almost become one."

"What?" Bo titled his face from the crook of Sean's shoulder and looked up at him.

"If you died, you'd become both a failure and a coward—a coward for admitting defeat easily, a disgrace to all men. And a failure for failing to understand your father's sacrifice. You said your father's been going through lots of hardship just for you, right? Then don't you know what that means?"

Bo shook his head to which Sean continued with a smile.

"It means that he loves you, and he really needs you. He endures all the hardships because he requires your existence. He'll do anything to keep you alive, yet here you are, trying to make his sacrifice in vain. If you were to die, what would your father feel? You want all the hardships he's been through to be in vain?"

"I-I..."

"Listen to me. No matter what, you must never give up on living. Life is precious. You can't throw it away easily. If you're gone, the pain and suffering will fall on the living who will always miss you. You're not that selfish, aren't you, my angel?"

Bo bit his lips, unable to say anything. Sean used the back of his knuckles to brush the smooth cheek tenderly before he continued with his words.

"And remember. You have two people in that category now; one is your father, and another is me. We'll be your strength, and we'll always get your back. Don't let us down, okay?"

Tears almost threatened to trickle down his cheeks once again, but Bo swallowed them all back. No more being a weakling. No more crying. No more suffering. It's time for him to stay firm on his own two feet. He would no longer fear falling, for he knew his father would be on his right, and Sean would be on his left to help support him and break his fall.

Determined with a resolute solution, Bo sat up straight and looked at Sean, "Okay. I won't let both of you down."

"Promise?" asked Sean.

"Promise."

"Good," Sean ruffled Bo's hair affectionately before getting up to his feet and headed to the table where he put his tray on, "now, let's get you something to eat so that we can head back to your house. Your father must be getting worried by now."

<<<TO BE CONTINUED>>>