I arrive home, breathless. Shane and I hardly said a word to each other the whole journey back, and I feel vaguely giddy.

Betty gives a meow of annoyance; clearly unhappy I spent the whole day away.

"Don't speak to me like that. We have an emergency." I pick her up and bury my face in her fur. "Betty, a guy kissed me." I pause, putting her on the table and giggling. "A guy kissed me! A guy kissed me! You know what that means, right?"

Betty blinks slowly, looking more interested in whatever she's getting for dinner than what I'm telling her.

"Betty, that means he's in love with me! He's totally gonna call me and ask me out, then we'll get married and have kids, and grow old and die."

Humming, I take her bowl and fill it up. She hops off the table and starts eating. Then, a horrible thought crosses my mind.

"Oh, Betty, what if he doesn't like me? What if he just wanted to kiss me for fun? What if it was a platonic kiss and I don't know?! Oh, I can't see him ever again. Betty, I'm gonna kill myself, I-"

Betty meows from her food bowl. I take a breath.

"You're right, you're right... it's late. I'd better head to bed... and speak to him in the morning." I reach down and kiss her head. "Goodnight, my perfect angel." I murmur before heading to bed.

***

I leave the house the next morning. I decide to wear one of my dresses, seeing as Shane liked the one I wore yesterday.

I walk through town with a silly smile on my face. Every time I try to remove it, it comes back when I think of Shane's lips on mine.

"Good morning, Madeleine!" Elliott calls to me.

"Morning, Elliott." I reply.

"You look awfully happy."

I smile. "I am."

"It's a beautiful day, isn't it?" Elliott replies.

"Hm? Oh, yeah. I didn't notice."

Elliott eyes me for a second. I stare at the ground.

"What's gotten you so happy?" He asks.

Unable to contain myself, I tell him. "Shane and I kissed."

His expression turns to shock. "What? When?!"

"Yesterday in the city, we- we were dancing and then he kissed me."

"Oh, my!" he breaks out into a grin. "Is he your boyfriend now?"

"Well, we haven't really talked about it yet, but..."

He gives me a look of excitement. "Well, what are you waiting for! Go talk to him! Go, go!" he puts his hand on my back and gently pushes me in the direction of Shane's house.

I look back at him with a smile and walk to Marnie's ranch. He gives me a thumbs up.

I knock on the door. I can't wait to see him again. The door opens, and Jas looks up at me.

"Hi, Jas, sweetie! Is your uncle Shane in?"

She turns around, and goes into the house. I hear distant shouts of 'Code red! Code red!'

I wait a few minutes and then Shane turns up at the door. He looks somewhat like he's just gotten up and he's made a desperate attempt at doing his hair.

"Sup." He says with a nod.

I smile. "Morning. Can we talk?"

His expression remains cool but his eyes widen just slightly. "Yeah, sure." He glances to his side where Jas is watching. "Let's... let's go outside."

We walk a few feet to the river, and he takes a seat. I follow suit.

"So..." I give a soft sigh and a smile.

"So?" He responds. He crosses his arms.

"Yesterday was fun."

"Mmhmm. It was." he pauses. "Look, Madeleine, about the kiss..."

"Yeah, let's talk about that." I reply.

"I don't know what I was thinking. It was a spur of the moment, I wouldn't have ever done that usually."

I blink a couple times. "Oh. Oh! Oh, yeah, no, I understand." I laugh, because if I don't I worry I will burst into tears.

"Yeah. Sorry if I confused you. Never in my right mind would I dream of kissing you in other settings."

Every word feels like a knife, but I laugh again. "Yeah, as long as we're on the same page. Okay, good talk, bye." I stand up, and before he can say anything, I'm walking back to the farmhouse.

The minute I burst through the door and slam it shut, I scream.

Then, I continue screaming while I shove the My Chemical Romance CD into the CD player, pull on my black hoodie, and draw on my eyeliner thick. This is my favourite way to cope.

What the fuck was I thinking?!

Nobody has ever liked me, why would they start now? Why would he ever like me? Why?

Betty, a few feet away, watches with wide eyes. Tears are falling down my face, leaving long runs of mascara on my cheeks. I sit on the floor, back leant on the couch. I've stopped screaming, now all I have is tears.

Betty crawls into my lap and I pet her ears. With a sniffle, I speak.

"It didn't go so well."

With the music blasting, I almost miss the sound of someone knocking on my door. Without thinking, I turn it off, and answer it.

Shane stands there. "Hey, Madeleine- oh."

He stares at me for a moment, taking in my MCR hoodie and my eyeliner. He blinks a couple of times.

"...is now a bad time?"

"That depends. What do you want?" I reply.

"Uh... sorry, I'm trying to focus. I just didn't think you were so... uh..."

"Emo?"

"Yeah." He shifts uncomfortably. "Anyway, I wanted to check on you. You sorta ran off back there. And now you're listening to My Chemical Romance at full volume with mascara running down your face."

I lean against the door, covering my face in embarrassment. "Shane, I-" I take a breath. "I liked the kiss. And for you to turn around and say that- that you would never kiss me in your right mind kinda hurt."

He looks shocked. "You- you liked the kiss?!

"Yes! And when I came to talk to you I was hoping you'd say the same."

Shane stares at me. "Oh my God, Madeleine, I'm so sorry." He takes my hand. "I loved the kiss. I've been wanting to kiss you for so long, but I thought... I thought, what would a- an angel like you want to do with a loser like me? So... so I said the words I thought you were gonna say before you could."

"Oh, Shane..." I wrap my arms around his neck and his arms go around my waist. "I would never say that to you. You're my best friend. And I want to kiss you more. Like, a lot more."

He pulls out of the hug, but keeps his hands on my waist. "Do... do you maybe wanna kiss now...?" his face is slightly flushed.

I giggle, burying my face in his shoulder. "Yes."

With a smile, he hooks a finger under my chin, and meets his lips with mine.