Sometimes you feel so rueful that you wish with all your heart to undo the things you've done. To take back your actions, to have a better sight of yourself losing control then moulding it in accordance to the circumstances, recoiling it from doing the unnecessary.

This is what we usually do, giving up to our temptations, desperately wanting to have an outlet for all the pent up emotions. Not recognizing the harm they might bring. The damage they are capable of doing. And even after we spill it out to our heart's content, hoping for satisfaction, for fulfillment, we still stay restless. Edgy. Reprimanding our doings, preferring the once ignored silence and steer.

But it's always too late to back out, too late to measure the pros and cons once the unguarded arrow leaves the bow. Striking it along with inviting the opponent for an attack, giving the green inkling of war. Of words or of action, sometimes just emotions.

It seemed like time froze with me, icing everything around. A wave of panic revolved around me, filling me with dread. My recent memory bringing back the pictures of his tough looks and dominating attitude from earlier today and how they promise dread to the one at the receiving end. I'm no idiot, everyone can tell that this man is not someone you can have a decent conversation with, unless you have a death wish. 

I sigh, irritated with myself. My brain at war with the neurons for going bonkers. It finally urges me to run away, away from the lion I had insanely tickled. My cold, shaky hands still clutching the straps of my bag tight, my knuckles white.

I stepped back to turn away but perhaps, I was late. He had already turned around, seething. His once beautiful green eyes in their darkest shade. His expressions contorted to fury, the intensity of which runs a shiver down my spine.

He strides forward while I clumsily step back, hopelessly trying to create space between us. I try to show him as little fright on my features as I can, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of his success.

His pair of rough hands cluch my forearms pushing me hard against the wall on my right, killing my efforts to escape. His fingers digging in my skin so deep, that the strength might leave bruises.

I restrain from flinching and dart a look at him with distaste. His face glowering, just inches away from mine. I try to free myself from him despite knowing that even all my strength combined wouldn't be equal to his hold and I'm sure he isn't even using half of what he possesses.

He looks down at me with narrowed eyes, seemingly frustrated at my attempts when I try to pull my arms out of his iron grip. His lips pursed. Rage showing through every feature of his. Our bodies so close to each other that his smell completely engulfs me.

His scent, so intoxicating, so aromatic that it could hypnotize a person the very instant. He smelled peculiar, confusing in a sense you'd want more of it. He smelled like dew, grass, woods and something strange with a masculine essence of musk. A balsamic warmth emanating him; something captivating.

His robustness on my arms was unwavering. He was angry, really angry, anyone could tell. His gaze unrelenting, daunting me with a story of harm. My only goal to slip away from his hold. To run away from the trouble I've invited with open arms.

"What the hell did you just do, do you have any idea who I am?" He seethed. Boy, was his voice good? He sounded hoarse yet smooth, his voice raspy yet enamoring. The scratchy rough voice could be perhaps, due to the lack of talking, I can't be sure. But it was the kind of domineering voice that lures you in.

Control woman, control!

I stood there dumbfounded gazing at his eyes until his words sank in and a tide of anger crashed against me. I tried preparing my answers for his shot questions because I'm the kind of a person who needs to prepare and replay their answers in their minds before responding and still end up coming with nothing suitable. Regretting it once the argument is over.

 1. The hell which you ask about is something I did and I'm unaware as to why would I ever do that? Why would I throw it on your head, when you are so crabby that you deserve it to be directly thrown at your face.

2. I have a good idea that you are a person who's panties are in twist. In short, you are super mean.

Do I even have guts to answer the ones I prepared. Just one look at his face and I'm good with keeping these thoughts in my mind. Oh God! he's scary but I wouldn't let him know that. If he realizes that he's intimidating me, he would continue to do so and that is so not what I'd give him liberty with.

With all he has said, he sure deserves an answer back and he's so getting one.

But wait! Wouldn't he turn crazier if I answer him back?

But before I could even come up with a decent comeback, he continues.

"I know people like you very well. Unprincipled and extra. I know that these are your tactics to grab attention. But unfortunately, you've attacked the wrong person. You can't trap everyone, lady. Try your luck somewhere else." he said.

With this his hold unfurled and he stepped back, wanting to walk away. He turned around and proceeded. But I won't let him. How can he insult someone for something they hadn't even done. I'd helped him, and these are his words of gratitude? He snapped at me like I was the one at fault. Like it's because of me that he got hurt (we're not going to involve the chocolate accident, it was a sweet punishment) or it was because of me that his phone broke, or because of me all of this has happened, whatever it was. Talk about being judgemental.

I close my eyes, taking deep breaths to keep myself from exploding in rage. Glaring at his broad back. I reply which pauses him mid stride,

"Well, as good as you think you are in judging people. You pathetically lack this ability. If trapping someone, in your terms, is what we refer as wanting to be thanked and apologized. Then yes! I trapped you.

Because a person should've enough sense to exchange pleasantries or show that they're wanting to. And for your questions, I should be sorry that I threw that" I said pointing at the chocolate on the ground, "at you but I wouldn't be. Secondly, I very well know who you are, wanna know who? here listen, you are a human monument of arrogance, lacking ethics."

He seemed taken aback by my reply as though he had never gotten retorted. By the looks of it, he was not expecting a sassy knock on his ego. And after receiving one, he was bewildered, shocked even but still he was professional enough in not letting his blank look slip.

With this I stormed off picking up my chocolate that remained laying on the pavement. Not waiting for him to react or respond. I've already had enough. Who was he to judge? Who does he think he is? I wouldn't have cared even if he was the President's son. Which he sure wouldn't be.

Because no matter who you are. You should always have primal etiquettes. They are those things which speak of you before your background or education does. And lacking them means lacking everything. A word or two of respect, of kindness harms none. Never had, never would.

I unwrapped my chocolate biting at it angrily but it wipes of my rage soon after I start eating it. A mischievous smile crosses my face when I delve in the delight of the chunky goodness. 

Reminded by the stunt I had pulled, a chuckle escapes my lips, lifting my mood instantly. If I had ruined a few things at first by propelling the chocolate at him and being mean, he did not even leave me a choice to regret over it.

I'd been a slight hypocrite lashing at him, since I was the one dragging him in the act of violence. But it's not like he would get a concussion by my faulty throw and had he not been the butt-hole he that was I might've actually apologized.

Well, someone had missed the chance of apology.

With this I stepped in the University forty minutes later than usual. I so badly wanna blame him for it. But then who am I kidding I was equally at fault for wasting my time talking to him. Well, fighting with him to be more precise.

I entered my class to be scolded by a very furious Prof. Paige.

Late attendees always aggravate him. His good persona changes in seconds if someone shows up in between his lecture that's why most people, by most I mean everyone is in time for his class.

And here, the least expected person, I, the supposed nerd, was late but thankfully I had been excused because it was my very first time so he couldn't question my tardiness much. Although he kept glaring at me from time to time and mumbling of how I was so late. I wasn't even five minutes late actually but he constantly ranted on how I missed so much and it would take me so long to cover up. Drama. Drama.

I wanted to roll my eyes so bad at him but dropped the idea, mentally reminding myself to do it as soon as I reach for the door after class.

Here I'm getting scolded and there that meanie must be enjoying his time with his anger. Just him and his anger. Alone and forever.

After the endlessly stretched classes, we were given further schedules of a few other assignments and modules that might be collected sporadically.

It is a long day. A very long day indeed.

***
I came back home cursing the universe. Dragging myself, I pushed the thought of preparing dinner for myself away for the time being. I dropped myself on the couch when the aroma of lasagna tickled my nostrils. My tiredness wore off and I jumped squealing, when I saw the sight of my favourite person. 

He stood there smiling his warmest smile at me. His eyes filled with love. Keeping his spatula down, he dusted his hands on his apron, chuckling at my surprised face.

"Jerdyyyyyyyyyyy!" I yelled running in his arms. He kissed me on my forehead and wrapping his arms tighter around me. I snuggled in his chest. His familiar warmth glowing the otherwise dull mood of mine.

"I missed you" I said looking up and my lips formed a subconscious pout.

"I missed you more" he said. I felt at peace listening to his voice. It feels so homey. Bosom. Known.

"Not possible. You can't miss me as much as I did" I say, clinging to him like a koala.

"Really?" he asked. His voice challenging.

"Really." I know what was coming but I kept playing because it's all these things you miss someone the most. Wanting to relive everything you have with them. The little situations you can fondly associate with them.

And there he started tickling me until I sank on the floor and my eyes teared up due to the laughing fit that bubbled after his fingers did his torture.

It's been fifteen days. Fifteen days of me coming home to an empty place, trying to entertain myself in his absence. I'd missed him, badly. My Jerdy.

"Okay, okay- you...you- missed me m-more. Stop!" I struggled to say in between giggles. He finally stopped. But a smile stayed at his lips.

He smiled often but his eyes were always sad, burying a story in them. Hiding their gloominess from the world but I cannot miss how they sparkled at my sight. As though I was the only hope to return their glimmer. No matter how lost it may be.

His features suddenly reminding me of someone, a strange familiarity in them. I shake my head discreetly when I hear him speaking.

"Come bunny, I've cooked your favourite food." I nodded and we sat and talked as we ate.

I had mistakenly said that it was only him who I missed earlier. It's not only him but everything that comes with him, everything about him, his feels, the food he cooks, the tales he tells, the sense of protection, the sense of love, every little thing related to him.

After talking and chatting with Jerdy. We retired to our rooms. As unappealing as it felt after the fun with Jerdy I had to study since my exams were round the corner and I had to score good. But it wasn't as hard as I'd expected.

Being a nerd helps sometimes, as more than half of my syllabus was covered. Just had to work on a few papers and reviewing was required and I was almost ready to attend the exams.

I tried studying more but my eyelids were droopy as sleep cradled in them. I quickly changed and laid down not before switching on my night bulb. A said source to eliminate my nightmares apparently, even though they always have other plans.

A face reappeared at the back of my mind. His face, the angry him. Angry bird! Yeah, that's the right name for him and his fury filled self. My mind was splurged with flashes of him, his eyes, his gaze, his voice and him. 

I shook my head to brush him off my mind. Where on earth do people like him refuel their ego from? Is there some station. A charger perhaps?

Prof. Paige and Angry bird should sit and talk. Maybe in between trying to kill each other with glares, their anger will collide and dissipate. Only if it was possible.

He doesn't even deserve being a part of my mind. Trying to divert it, I alternately started thinking of other fictional scenarios.

I internally smiled when I realized that Jerdy had returned and will probably not go again for some time.

With this, my mind succumbed to the sleep that had been constantly nagging it. Even after the face reappeared, the blank green eyes stoic and staring at me earnestly, my mind didn't insist dodging their appearance and I gave up to be drowned by the depth of the jade.

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A/N: Honestly, thank you guys! I love your support. 250+ reads already... I can't thank y'all enough.

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- Love, S!