It took Nðx awhile to open Eldrazi's eyes, but they supposed that was what they were now. Their eyes. How silly they'd been, denoting them as Eldrazi's, or Gavin's, or some other vague 'his' this entire time. Those were mortal concepts, and hadn't their craving for a taste of Human life been the very thing that had started all of this?

And yet, somehow, their heart still longed for it: the type of forgetting that came with hundreds of lives, and hundreds of deaths. But now they were awake, the dream broken, because there was no going back. Whatever Akasha had done with her face of the Past, they could feel it, not only in their mind, but in their form as well, dark, sharpened claws clutching at the sides of their aching head, a tail containing spines twitching behind their back. Yet, there was a wave of relief when they could still make out the blond bangs of the boy in front of their view. He was still there, and he would be all right.

Which brought them to the next line of order as rage filled their lungs. Because Eldrazi, Nðx, what did it matter what they went by? They were the God of Chaos, and if they wanted to forget it all and play as Eldrazi, then they could do as they damn well pleased.

There was just one person getting in the way of that.

Their lip curled, stance low as Eldrazi glared at her standing in the centre of the circular room, head held high to match the arched ceiling of the temple above. How dare she come here with her long dresses, all regal and righteous as if she hadn't just ruined everything.

"Why Akasha?" Eldrazi demanded, hating how breathy their voice sounded now. It used to be deep, carefree. Now it sounded ancient, hissy, and worn by time. "Why'd you 'ave to go and bring it all back?"

For what was meant to be such a pretty face, it contorted into pure rage, blue eyes boring into them with more hatred than they'd ever known. "Why are you still talking in that accent? You're not Human, Nðx!"

Suddenly, her hand was letting go of their wrist, and a slap hit their cheekbone, fast and hot, the force enough to throw Eldrazi back. A sharp shock ran through their spine as it collided with the marble of the temple floor, cold stone rubbing painfully at their skin until they collided with something.

Glancing up, they spotted Aoife, her eyes shooting wide as her body began to move again, whatever trance Akasha had placed on her before breaking at their touch. "E-eldrazi?" she asked, not seeming to believe it as she looked them over again and again.

They tried their best to grin, all with their body sprawled out along the ground. "Som'in like that. Mind 'elping a fella up?"

Her mouth opened and closed a few times, but she nodded, holding out a hand all while her focus darted between them, and the heaving Goddess. "What happened to you? Where's Gavin?"

A small, weak force squirmed within Eldrazi's chest, but that too, was a comfort as they placed a claw in Aoife's trembling grasp. "'E's still there. Just being a quiet little lad, same as ever. Innit that right, Gav?"

Lo, more silence.

Well, that was to be expected at this rate. After all, with the amount of memories Akasha had flooded them with, Eldrazi wouldn't want to talk in front of the horrid lady anyway. At least all the dread and rage from before was starting to die away, they noticed. It always seemed to last much longer in that mortal body, but now a cold was laced through their veins, as boundless as the space between the stars. It couldn't be bothered to care, at least not for long, because length was the only quality it could hold, as winding and endless as a snake swallowing their own tail. It was a force that was consumed, consuming, and would continue to consume until there was nothing left.

"I will say, Akasha," Eldrazi began, tilting their head back, all to meet her gaze. It was odd, looking at her now. Moments ago, she had the same level of familiarity as catching sight of yet another statue, and now they couldn't look at her as anything less than what she was. And that was her. No other term needed. That was enough to make their teeth grind as they continued. "It was rather foolish o' ya to go givin' me my memories back. Course, didn't exactly want them, but, now that they're 'ere..."

The smile stretched wider, forked tongue licking at the scars along their lips, and they delved into their magik. Not the Will of any god, but the heart of the source itself: Chaos.

It wasn't settled in their chest anymore, they noticed. No. It was settled in everything. It came from the random chance of weather shifting, or the possibility that Akasha might trip on her skirts, or tea cooling or stars falling or time ripping apart because everything was leading towards a natural state of disorder. It was a sharp, wild feeling, like breathing in thorns, and Eldrazi welcomed it back, letting it tear their form to nothing but shadow.

Behind them, Aoife yelped, but they ignored it. Eldrazi had had the Relic, held it in their hands before Akasha had changed them into this strange, half-mortal state. Their eyes rapidly scanned the floor, spotting it none too far away, knocked from their grasp in the midst of the sudden relapse of time.

Already, Eldrazi was darting towards it, a prickling cold washing over their skin, their mind, turning them into a dark, stretching silhouette. Only a few feet away, the rising sun casted the shadow of one pillar, then another. They were fast enough. They could jump it.

It came as a flicking burst, each aspect of light in the room yanking their shapeless form in all directions as they shot from the first pillar to the second, and it took all of their focus to hold themselves together. But, the second shadow came with the cold touch of metal, and Eldrazi peeled away from the flatness of the floor, returning to a person-like being that snatched up the purple, glowing sword, raising it with a triumphant smile.

"Ha. Got it!"

Strangely though, as they tossed a glance behind them, Akasha didn't move. Not fighting them, not stopping it. Just... watching, same as before. And, while it was hard to sift through thousands upon thousands of years of memories– enough to make their head spin– something about it didn't seem right.

Then again, when had they ever liked what was "right"? Was it really such a problem, winning? They didn't think so. After all, if their recollection served right, then...

Their eyes landed on Aoife, and they drew closer, step by step.

I haven't won in a very long time.

The girl only continued to tremble as Eldrazi reached her side, and they awkwardly reached up to scratch at one of their pointed ears, tipped in black. How to phrase, how to phrase... They bit at their lip, looking at the sword, then the white stone floor. Aeons ago, the answer of what to do now would've been simple. Find the girl, keep her safe from Akasha's wrath, and hide the Relics once more. Another silly story about how they could grant wishes, another whisper in a mortal's ear of why they must stay hidden, kept apart, piece by piece, and then start all over again. But that had been before losing all that knowledge to time, before becoming Eldrazi.

Before meeting Gavin.

Again, they felt the soft flicker of a second life within them, and their resolve hardened, gaze lifting to meet the Phoenix's concerned eyes once more. "I'm... sorry, Aoife."

"What? Why?" she demanded, and her hands leapt out, taking hold of their shoulders. "I don't know what's going on! The Goddess is here, you- you look like—" She cut herself off sharply. "You look like Nðx."

"Yeah, it's..." Eldrazi took a deep breath. "It's a long story, and quite frankly I just remembered most o' it myself, but that's not the problem right now."

Her brows drew together, confused. "Then what is? Tell me." Her voice grew choked, tears filling her eyes. "Please. I'm worried about you."

"The point is..." Eldrazi pulled slightly away from her hold, waving the sword first one way, then the other. Finally they sighed. "I can't wish for your equality or your freedom or whatever."

"What?" Instantly, her gaze narrowed. "What are you talking about? We agreed on this, Eldrazi!" She took a step forward.

"Actually, you were tricked. Backstabbed, deceived, 'oodwinked, whatever you prefer. This was what Gav and I were trying to do from the very beginning."

"What?" she asked again, although this time it was closer to a demand, spittle landing on their face as the girl's hands began to pulse with a sharp, vibrant heat. "Eldrazi! This isn't funny! Knock it off or—"

A strange, solid sensation suddenly crawled over Eldrazi's skin. It snatched at their claws, legs, tail, everything as the sword jerked down, Eldrazi's hand unnaturally wrenched lower...

The blade plunged deep into Aoife's chest.

Screams pierced the air, half from the girl, half from Eldrazi as they watched blood spurt all over their front. It had gone in heavily, yet sickeningly smooth, and all Eldrazi wanted to do was yank it out, move back, step away, something. But instead they were frozen in place, a cold, heartless gaze filling their face. It was easy to put a finger on it now, that apathetic lull, flavoured like a brown pear.

It was Gavin.

"Funny," he muttered, putting a boot on Aoife's shirt to pull out the Relic. He watched it blankly as she tumbled onto the floor, forming a puddle behind her. "I always thought I'd use them to save Cynwrig."

"Gav!" Eldrazi shouted, thankful that at least they could grab for their tongue as they watched the scene in horror: Aoife, laying still on the ground, Gavin, standing over her, unfeeling, all while the laughter of a Goddess echoed in their ears. "What are you doing? I thought you said you were gonna use them t' save the world!"

"That was before you lied to me, Eldrazi. Or should I say, Nðx?" Gavin snarled. The sword was dropped to the floor with a clatter, and he began to pace back and force, their claws flinging about as he ranted. "Gods! It really was everything, wasn't it? Your age, your name, what you were, oh! And even what you wanted the Relics for! What a surprise. I always wanted to have to steal my own body back. Say, what happened to the rule that it was always mine first, yours second?" He glared at the blackened tips of their fingers, shaking. He couldn't turn back what the Goddess had done, it seemed, another fact that clearly enraged him. "Did you conveniently forget that too?"

"No Gav! I didn't! I swear I didn't, but now isn't the time! We have to– Aoife is—" They gave up talking, trying to get the boy to turn, spin, help her. The girl was groaning through wails, her breathing growing ragged. They needed to apply pressure, or she was going to die. "You're going to get her killed!"

"Isn't that what you wanted?" Gavin mused, head continuing to cock. "And anyways, she's fine. See?"

The sound of their boots echoed as he drew near, watching her, still expressionless. Now that they were closer, Eldrazi could see the way the blood was no longer leaping from her like a fountain, but rather a slowly trickling stream, eyes glazing over even as they narrowed at them. Still, if she wanted to say something, she couldn't over the sharp whistling of her fading breath and gurgling of her own blood.

"Gav, what are you talkin' about? Lookit her. She's dyin'!" Eldrazi screamed, and their vision blurred, tears forming even as Gavin tried to blink them away. Again, they tried to surge forward, save her, protect her, but it was all caged off. It was wrong. So very, very wrong. This wasn't Gavin, not their Gav. That boy was sweet, caring. He caught rabbits for them and blushed whenever he had to talk in front of others and got excited about reading and cared for his brother and—

"I didn't kill her. If anyone did, it's you." He stood up, not even sparing the girl a second glance as he faced the Goddess. Her laughter stopped, and horror crawled through Eldrazi spine at the way her head tipped to give the boy a sickeningly sweet, yet motherly smile. Her arms held out, beckoning him forward, and Gavin took one step towards her, then another as he continued to speak. "But semantics aside, all the Relics do is change her form back to the one that it seems like you stole. It's the same as ever, Eldrazi." Their teeth grit. "I'm fixing your mistakes."

"Aoife!"

Gavin spun midstep. Because there, in the arched, temple doorway, was Selatan.

"No!" He shot forward, knees slamming to the floor as his hands leapt towards her. "No!" he repeated. "Aoife, I can't do this! Not ag—"

Her form collapsed to ash beneath his touch.

It was a violent, angry thing, torrents of black and grey rolling along the marble floor in waves. It seemed far more than the last time, nearly endless as Gavin yelped, darting out of its path as it whisked between the pillar walls, drifting higher and higher into the blackened sky.

The world grew darker, even more than what the slowly rising sun should've allowed. Air became grating, too filled with ash to support life, and an inky darkness began to spread as the Dust gathered, wrapping tighter and tighter around the sun.

Eldrazi watched it, unable to breathe as an intense humming rang in their ears, the sun turning a hazy pink, then black.

A high-pitched whine carved through the sky, the sun rupturing in a blinding, brilliant burst.

Then all became shadow.

"Finally!" The Goddess flung herself against the glassless window, laughter shaking her shoulders. "After all this time you're dead! You're finally dead, Belhain!"

Perhaps it was because they were already darkness itself, but Eldrazi was still able to make her out in the pitch black, eyes stuck open wide and fingers clutching the windowsill, eagerly watching the deadened sky. "Now you know how it felt, to watch every aspect of yourself die! It took years but I did it, and now there's nothing left for you to mock me with. I'm free!"

"What?" Gavin thundered, and suddenly Eldrazi found them reaching for the Goddess's robes, claws shaking. "What do you mean, nothing left? You said she was going to return to being the bird! You said she wouldn't die! That the Dust would be fixed and the world saved and, and..." Gavin sputtered, panic scraping at their lungs. "You said gods couldn't lie!"

"Oh my child." A soft hand reached down, pinching their chin just a bit too tight to make them look into her smiling face once again. "All you need to do is look at the one in you to know how true that was."

Gavin's eye shot open, and desperately he pulled himself back, head shaking rapidly. "No. I didn't kill her. I didn't kill her, I didn't want to kill her. I was saving the world, I was stopping Eldrazi, not—"

A growl echoed behind them, and Gavin twitched as amber cat's eyes glinted in the dark. "You murdered Aoife?"

"No!" Gavin shouted, ducking as Selatan drew his sword. "Eldrazi did! It's all their fault!"

But Selatan only glanced at the weapon in his hand, held so tightly in fingers tainted grey with ash. Again, that haunted look was on his face, chest rapidly expanding and shrinking as he desperately grabbed for air. "No." It came as a whisper, then anger flashed across his features and his voice raised with the sword. "No! You lied to us! I knew I couldn't trust you. You tried to shoot her from the start, and instead you led us here, used us..." He paused, face shooting red with fury as he realised something else. "You told me to wait just so you could take her from me!"

The last part was hardly able to be understood, his words completely distorted from tears. The sword shot towards them, and with a short cry, Eldrazi ducked back, a wild arc slicing the air only a hair to their left. Gavin stood, petrified as he stared at how close it'd been, but Eldrazi refused to let it hit them, reaching for a cold bond to call their legs to action.

The Relic. They needed the Relic as Selatan continued to charge. It was only an arm's length away, and quickly, Eldrazi slid the last couple inches until the heavy thing was in their grasp. Then it immediately was thrown above their head as Selatan's broadsword came crashing down.

The sheer shock rippled through their nerves, coursing painful waves of lightning into their elbows. It weakened their arms, Selatan's sword pressing closer and closer as the scraping of metal filled Eldrazi's ears. Slowly, the teen's blade was tipping against theirs, angling towards their face, and with a shout, Eldrazi pulled back, rolling to the side to gain at least some distance. It was one of the few nice things about their old form, the agility that came with.

"Selatan!" Eldrazi warned, trying to keep their voice steady. "Don't do this."

"Eldrazi?" The redhead hesitated, but then his gaze narrowed. "If you're there, why didn't you stop him? Did you want this?"

"No." Eldrazi shook their head, wincing as they caught the pained look in Selatan's eyes. Within their mind, Gavin had gone quiet again, most likely trying to let Eldrazi work things out, but that was fine. Eldrazi could smooth it out for him, and then he'd be safe. That was all that mattered in the end, and so, they continued, "I didn't know what was coming, or I would have. I'm sorry."

Selatan frowned, staring at the floor. He hummed in acknowledgement, testing the weight of the sword in his hand. Then he looked up. "I'm sorry. It's not your fault you're stuck in that bastard, but that was Aoife." He gave one last nod, tears silently beginning to roll down his cheeks. "I'm going to kill him. I'm sorry."

Pure terror raced down Eldrazi's spine, adding to the constant chill that lay within. "No! You can't!" they cried, holding out the sword in defence again, even if it was far smaller than Selatan's blade. "He didn't know! He doesn't deserve it!"

"You don't know what he deserves! She was the only thing I had left!" Selatan screamed, and then the blade was coming for their head.

With a cry, Eldrazi ducked, feeling the flaky air shift as it coursed over them. Heart pounding, they backed up again, glancing at their options. There weren't many. Aoife's body was gone, the world was coated in her ashes, the sun had exploded, and the Goddess had won, like she'd planned from the very start, when she exiled Nðx aeons ago.

Except this time, she'd gone around them, all while they weren't watching.

Another attack, this time at their ribs. Eldrazi wrenched at their magik again, liquidating into shadow only to appear behind Selatan. But, even as his back was completely open to them, what was Eldrazi meant to do? Hit him? He didn't want to do that. That wasn't right. Instead they backed up again, preparing to dodge.

A hot pain ran through their neck.

It stung before the hit occurred, Selatan's sword grazing the skin moments after, all while his eyes echoed the Goddess' blue. It was a surprise she was even still lending her magik out, all to kill the boy who had given her her dying world.

Then again, she had no use for him now.

The thought brought tears to Eldrazi's eyes, their throat clenching as the sword trembled in their hands. "Selatan, please," they begged, and while their magik was there, easily able to make Selatan more willing to listen, Eldrazi ignored its call, instead choosing words alone, as was only right. "I know you're angry, but this solves nothing. What's done is done, and eventually, it was all going to fall apart anyway."

They swallowed. Hard. "I-I realise that now, that all I was trying to do was pretend like it wasn't. That I could just keep filling my life with other things, and maybe I could forget that eventually, everything would become nothing."

The breathiness in their voice grew stronger, the words barely even sounding Human anymore, but perhaps that was what made Selatan freeze, his stance cautious, wary, but more importantly, listening. "You have to understand that the one that filled my life with the most meaning was Gavin. Every other life, I threw away. I would take it, have a little fun, try to understand what all these mortals... treasured so much in life. What made it worth living if it was all going to fade anyway?"

Eldrazi laughed, shaking their head. "And I never got it, until I met him. And it was strange. I'd lived so many other, happier lives. If anything, this was the most rotten one, being hated, beaten, tortured, everything and everyone I ever cared for taken from us... but that's the thing Selatan. I learned to care."

The Demon was giving them his full attention now, and Eldrazi stepped closer, moving to lower the sword in their claws. There was no need to fight, or feel threatened. It was over now, but it wasn't the end. "That's why I need him, Selatan. I was Nothing without him, and once he's gone, I'll be Nothing once again. That's the point of life. You people, you go on, and you find things, and you hold onto them and never let them go. To you, it's love, and that was Aoife. And for me, well, bit of a different kind of love, I think, but still just as important, right?"

Selatan's eyes cast down, unable to make contact.

"Well, right now, my thing is a little broken." A heavy lump formed in their throat, and it was so hard to talk around it, every word choked. "I-I don't know when I lost him, but we're going to try again now, me and him. Next time, he won't remember this, and he won't even remember me. I'll teach him, and then we'll be back to the way things were." The very idea warmed their chest, in that strange, mortal way, and Eldrazi smiled through the panting. "It's like it all never 'appened! We can start all over!"

"No!"

That was when Gavin came crawling back, the numb feeling sinking into their body once more, only aided by the building of rage. "You don't get to control me again!"

"Aw, Gav, come on. You know I didn't mean it like that," Eldrazi winced. "Look, bad phrasin' all right? But we're tryin' again now, like I said, so I'll start. You and I—"

"No!" he cried again, nose wrinkling in disgust. "There is no you and I! I was lied to, used..." His mind wandered, and Eldrazi found him suddenly staring blankly at their hands, freshly turned to claws, filled with glittering lights like stars all under the Goddess' touch. "You're a part of me," he whispered.

"Yes!" Eldrazi quickly filled in. Good, he was getting it. They'd started to become worried, a feeling only added to by the sweat dripping down their neck amongst the blood. "See, we're inseparable? Always have been."

"You're... in me." Then he snarled, sharp fingers moving to scratch at their arm, their chest, their face, the last strike stinging as it drew blood. "I can't get rid of you; you're in me! You're in everything and I can't make you leave!"

"Gav, it's all right. This is gonna pass and we're all gonna be fine. Just calm down."

But instead, Gavin only chuckled. "It's all because you're in me. That's why the world's falling apart. That's why she's dead. I didn't kill her. You did. You think you're so funny and clever, trying to convince me this is all my fault, huh? Make me listen to your voice, taint my thoughts, and then you get to hide away and burrow into my flesh where you think I can't get you." His breathing grew more ragged, the sound of their heart growing ever louder in their ears. "But I just realised something, Eldrazi."

The numb feeling took over completely. It bit at Eldrazi's hands and legs until they felt the world growing farther away, colourful fog overtaking their senses. The boy's mind. They were back in it.

Quickly, Eldrazi clamoured into their feet, glancing around for the window, but the boy's eye was shut.

Right. Listening. That's all I got left.

Panic filled their lungs, blood racing as they rushed to find any information they could, but strangely, it was purely silent. Unnaturally silent.

Their eyes widened, mouthing falling open. The boy can't hear.

I can't do anything.

That was the last thought that hit Eldrazi before a sharp force like a punch dove beneath their ribs. The wind rushed from their lungs, and they buckled. Instantly, their claws clutched at their stomach, but they shook as another feeling spread across them, sticky and wet.

Blood.

The window was flung open, all senses rushing back to Eldrazi, almost too much to handle: Gavin screaming, the image of the sword pressed into their stomach, and pain, so much pain. It almost seemed to leak out with the pitch black blood draining onto his clothes. Hot as fire, cold as ice, tingling at every nerve, and yet completely numb. Fitting, for a creature born of Chaos, and yet—

"Why, Gavin?" Eldrazi demanded, though it seemed hard to speak now, each word pulling at the solid, carving feeling of the sword embedded in their flesh, making them seconds from hurling. "Why would you hurt yourself like that?"

"Because," Gavin whispered, and their teeth grit as they also tried to work around the agony burning holes within their mind. "When are you going to understand... that I'm hurting you, not me?" A deep, rattling breath, followed by a laugh. "I'm just leaving, to somewhere where you're never... ever going to find me."

"No. That's where you're wrong."

Eldrazi shook their head, and somewhere, overly warm hands were wrapping around them. They darted to and fro, not knowing what to do nor where, but Eldrazi did their best to wave Selatan off lazily. It was exhausting though, and they quickly rested their arm on the floor. That felt cold– welcomingly so– and Eldrazi pressed into it further, smiling. It was so dark now, and already, they could feel Astren's touch upon them, with its empty, lingering hold.

"I will always find you."