"I'm sorry, I don't think she's up for visitors," I hear Kugi say outside my door.

I flip over and hold the pillow close to my nose. It still smells like Baji. Kugi tried to wash it for me, but I didn't let her. Ever since it happened, which was a couple days ago, I haven't left my room. I can't face everyone. Not after what I did to them.

*Flashback*

"Let me go Draken!" I yell pulling my arm away finally.

We are already far gone from the parking lot. I look at my fist and hiss. Suddenly, my fist hits Draken's face.

"Hana stop!" Chifuyu says trying to hold me back, but I sweep him off his feet.

I get on top of him and throw a punch at his face, then another. He doesn't stop me though. I know he could stop me easily, but he doesn't. I feel myself sob while I continue punching him with all my strength. I see his eyes start to roll to the back of his head before I feel my arms being held back. I get pulled up and I turn around, my vision still blurry. I can still tell by his buzz cut hair and earring that it's Mitsuya.

"Hana, stop!" He yells in my face.

I freeze. I look and see Chifuyu knocked on the floor. I put a hand over my mouth. What have I done? Mitsuya lets me go. I look at them. They are looking at me like they've never seen me before. I feel my body tremble.

"Hana, let's talk okay?" Draken reaches for me but I take a step back.

And another. And another. And then suddenly I'm running. I'm running like my life depends on it. My lungs burn, but I don't stop. Not until I see I'm in front of Kugi's house. She opens the door seeing me in my situation. She drops her bag and runs to me as I fall down and pass out.

*Present day*

I hear my door open, but I don't bother to turn around. It's probably Kugi bringing me food again. The plates are piling up, with the food still on it. I feel the other side of my bed shift and a hand being placed on my shoulder. I finally turn around and see Mitsuya there. I turn back around, not being able to hold eye contact.

"Chifuyu is okay Hana. He's worried about you though. We all are," Mitsuya says.

"Hana," I hear another voice say.

I finally sit up and turn around. Mikey, Draken, Mitsuya, and Takemichi are there. Chifuyu is probably getting some bed rest. I feel a pang of hurt in my chest. I hurt a friend. A good friend to me. What's wrong with me? I get up and grab my Toman jacket and fist it hard.

"I'm not worthy of being part Toman," I hand Mikey the jacket. "I couldn't save Baji. I beat up a friend to a pulp. Baji..."

My voice cracks. "Right when things were going good... he left. He left me here."

I feel my steps start to waver and I feel myself start to fall, but someone catches me. I look and see Mikey there holding me. He pulls me in closer to him.

"I couldn't save him either," his voice falters as he whispers in my ear.

I pull away slightly and see him crying. I bite my lip and feel the tears fall again. He pulls me back into him and we both just cry. We dropped to the floor. I pull on his jacket and sob into him. I feel another hand on my back and another on my head. I cry with so much emotion it hurts. Suddenly, I feel all arms wrap around me. It's comforting but it hurts. The one person's arms I want the most around me is gone. Baji used to hug me like this. When I used to cry. He also knew I didn't like people seeing so he would wait for me to calm down before pulling away. I feel my breathing start to calm down. I pull away and look Mikey in the eyes.

"You can't leave Toman. You need to stay, for Baji," he says.

Someone stands at the door so I look up. "Chifuyu..."

He smiles at me sadly. "One of Baji's last wishes is that you would take his place specifically as Toman's 1st division captain."

My breath hitches. He wants me to take his place? I can never do as good of a job as him. "If that's what he wanted, I will do it."

Mitsuya gives me a sad smile. He pulls something out of his bag. It looks like another jacket.

"This is Baji's jacket," he says. "It feels right for you to keep it though."

I grab a hold of Baji's jacket and squeeze it. It's washed, so the blood is gone. I stand up and hang it to where I can see it anytime. I run my hands on the stitching. I lean in and kiss it.

"I love you, too," I whisper against it.