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11

It's been two months since everything happened. Still haven't progressed on getting Tanaka. Mikey, Draken, and Baji have been busy dealing with the Moebius, so I've been working by myself. I've been watching Tanaka when he leaves school.

(Flashback)

I watch as Tanaka walks hand in hand with my mom. She's laughing. He has a big smile on his face. My 'dad' is on his other side. It looks like he's telling him a joke and they are all laughing. My heart pangs. He seems so happy. How are they this happy with him but they couldn't do anything for me? My mom kisses his forehead and hugs him before he walks in school. Maybe Tanaka is just faking all of this. That's probably it. I watch him for a couple more weeks. His smile never falters. I know his real smile, and he's not faking. He's happy. They are stable. Apparently my father has gotten a stable job and my mom works at the bakery my aunt runs. I feel a tear run down my face as I watch Tanaka skipping out of school. He's happy now. I can't ruin it. 

"I'm sorry Tanaka," I whisper to myself and turn away, walking back to Baji's house. 

(flashforward)

That happened yesterday. I realized that I was the problem the whole time. They could've been happy without me. I was the mistake. I was the weirdo. I was the burden. I'm probably a burden to Baji and everyone else. I pack up my stuff in a bag. I need to leave. I can't stay here troubling all these people. But where am I gonna stay? If I take a train, I could stay at Uncle's house. His wife still lives there. I grab my phone and scroll through the contacts to find her. I finally do. I hesitate, but end up ringing her. 

"Hello, Hana dear?" I hear her sweet voice say through the phone. 

"Hey. I was wondering if I could stay with you. I got kicked out," I say.

The phone goes silent for a minute and then I hear her curse. "Those fucking idiots. Yes of course I have a room ready for you. Do you want me to pick you up?"

"No, it's okay. I'll take a bus to you. Thank you," I say. 

"Of course, dear. I'm sorry about your parents, they..."

"I know, it's okay," I say. 

I say my goodbye on the phone before grabbing my bag and heading out of the house. Baji's mom is busy in her office, so she didn't notice me. I left a note to her thanking her for everything and letting her know I'll be staying with a relative. I look at the house one more time before heading to the bus station.

(When she arrives at her aunts house)

Before I walk up to the door, it opens. I see her smiling at me sadly and running up to me. She engulfs me in her arms. I smell the familiar scent on her that I used to when I was a kid. My eyes water. 

"Its okay Hana, you're allowed to cry," she says into my ear as she squeezes me tighter.

My tears drench her sweater, but she never pulls away. Not until I do. She knows how I am. She's always respected my privacy and she knows how I don't like to show people when I cry. Unlike my biological mother who always pointed it out and laughed at me. She leads me inside and takes me to the familiar room I stayed at all the time. 

"I'll have dinner ready in a few okay? Feel free to take a shower and clean up. If you need anything I'll be here okay?" She says. 

I smile at her. "Thanks Kugi."

She smiles and walks out. I turn on the hot water and feel it burn my skin, but it feels good. I wash myself and step out of the shower looking in the mirror. I have scars and bruises all over my body, which I've always been insecure of. I feel the scar on my side from the stab. It's fully healed now. I start getting flashbacks of Baji. I left Baji. I didn't even say goodbye. It was the only thing you could've done Hana. If you stayed, you would burden him and his mom. Same thing for Draken and Mikey. I kept the uniform but am I really worthy of wearing it? I change into the clothes Kugi left for me and step out. I see her sitting at the table on the phone. She looks angry. She sees me come in and hangs up the phone. 

"I was on the phone with that pathetic excuse for a mother," she says. 

I smirk. "It looks like you gave her a piece of your mind."

The wrinkle between her brow disappears and she smiles. "You know I did. Let's eat now, I'm sick of talking about those two."

We dig into the food and start talking. "So have you made any friends? Boyfriends?" Her eyebrows wiggle at the last one. 

I blush. "I've made some friends. And... there is a boy."

She gasps. "Tell me everything!"

I tell her about Baji and what he did to dad. I told her about everything. From the gang to the stab. I was scared how she would react but she doesn't judge me at all. 

"I'm glad you got a stable group hon, just be careful. That stab was a close call, you're lucky to have those friends. So tell me about this boy," she says. 

"In the beginning, I hated him. I hated them all. But he was the one that busted Kiyomasa. He was the one that rushed me to the hospital. He took care of Tanaka when I couldn't. He let me stay at his house," I say. 

"So how does he feel now that you're here?" She asks taking a sip of her tea. 

"Well, I didn't tell him. I left," I say. 

Her eyes go wide and she puts her tea down. "Hana..."

"I just- I didn't want to burden them. I don't want to burden you either, so if I cause any trouble, just tell me to leave," I say. 

She shakes her head. "You aren't burdening me love. But you aren't burdening them either. From what I hear, he cares about you a lot. The fact that you left without telling him is going to hurt him. Are you sure you want to do that?" 

I suck in air through my teeth. "I can't go back now Kugi. It's not like he feels the same way that I do. He sees me as a friend. He'll get over it."

"I don't know, from what I've heard, he cares about you more than a friend," she says giving me a small smile. 

"Ugh let's stop talking about Baji, this is embarrassing," I say covering my face in my hands. 

I hear her laugh and I look up. She looks really happy and it's contagious. I start laughing, too. We enjoy the rest of night talking about happy memories. 

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