Reviewer: Capri5211

Comments: I thought the opening was strong as we see Charlie reappearing to the Hound base after being gone a year. Immediately the readers are introduced to the world of the Wildcards. We see Charlie's attraction to various characters and can visualize her desire to be with them. I enjoyed the diverse characters introduced in chapter one. The only thing was that I had to keep referring back to the character list because I got confused on the names such as Ash and Asher. I couldn't remember who was who. I'm excited to see how the story progresses to see why Charlie left in the first place and the dynamic between her and Asher. I would recommend breaking up the paragraphs a little more just to help the story flow better.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: keralee123

Comments: She does a great job of making the characters world seem so familiar right from the start, despite the fact that it's an entirely new book. I was definitely intrigued immediately partly from the fact that her book was unique to me. I hadn't read a romance novel where the main character was so gritty and in a gang.

I love that the main character is a badass. She's kicking ass and taking names and she's proud to be vulgar. However, I do find it slightly strange that it sounds like they're in this hardcore gang, yet the main character is in high school and was grounded by her parents. Lol

Initially having so many different characters was a bit confusing, plus there were two people with nearly the same name Ash and Asher. She loves Asher but her best friends name is ash and she talks about them both in the same sentences which is mind blowingly confusing.

Once I was able to finally get past the name confusion I really started enjoying the story. I love the nicknames for all of these people, even though having so many nicknames can also get confusing. It's a double edged sword but I was able to get through it, and in the end enjoy hearing Joker, Bane, Harley all being incorporated into the gang's nicknames.

The first chapter was definitely a long slow burn but I feel like it was necessary to show the readers how badly she missed Bane and to introduce the many characters. 

The next few chapters showed a different more playful side to the main cast of characters and helped most them stand out in my mind. 

The sex scenes were described beautifully and everything was fluent, leaving me excited for her and Joker then a little disappointed it turned out they would only stay friends. 

The fourth chapter left me with a cliffhanger and I knew I just couldn't stop there.

I have to be honest, a few times during the men trying on dresses fiasco I was tempted to skip through or stop reading for the night, but I pushed on. I'm glad I did, because even though it might have taken us a bit of character building to get there, after the fifth chapter I have to say I'm thoroughly addicted and I'll be continuing to read. 

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: JaszElise

Comments: The description was really hard to process between on who has more to gain and who has more to lose. Sadly I forced myself to read only two chapters which contains some very heavy details about what happened in the past. The characters in the story has a lot of major conflicted issues between Charlie, who is a nymphomaniac with a lot of mental health issues and lived in a unloving wealthy family. Bane, who blames everyone for what happened in his life and for leaving the crew behind. And Ash, who lost her unborn baby and was shunned for sleeping around behind her boyfriend's back. It was hard to understand it all and it was too emotional and heartbreaking to see that the motorcycle gangs have major trust issues too. I didn't felt anything at all while reading the story. It was okay but the description was unbearable to read.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: chessaandersen

Comments: First impression: Based on the cover alone, the story is about a sexy young girl. While the blurb accurately describes the interesting plot, it meanders with secondary characters and story arcs. 

Use of language: Other than a few punctuation and grammatical errors and some awkward sentences, the writing in a mechanical sense is very clean, clear, and concise.

Characterization: The character guide is a tremendous help when navigating through all the different characters and their nicknames. When one character has four different nicknames being used at various times, it can be confusing and ruin the flow of the scene or dialogue.Plot: The storyline is interesting, complicated, and dramatic, but unfortunately, a few unnecessary scenes and some minor supporting characters don't add anything to the main plot, making the reader lose interest or focus.The explanations of the main characters' disappearances are heartbreaking, but not well explained. Why was Ivy sent to live with her grandmother? Why did she have to attend a boarding school? Why did she stay there for only a year? Why and where did Bane go? The exposition is well written and tugs at the emotional heartstrings, but doesn't answer some basic questions.

Title: I'm not a big fan of using the same word twice in one title. If the title refers to a gang, the image of a sexy girl doesn't match the title. I would use a more object-based image instead of a person. 

Writing style: Some of the more longer paragraphs could be broken into smaller ones for better flow and readability. The tone is set up well with tense scenes and dramatic dialogue as bits and pieces of humor are sprinkled throughout.

Strengths: I love characters that beautifully broken and flawed, and the writer makes no apologies – rightly so – for that. The life of a teenager with a lousy family support system is accurately portrayed. The writer's passion for her characters is reflected through descriptions and dialogue.

Weaknesses: I had a hard time keeping track of the numerous characters, especially when they have so many different nicknames. I would pick the characters that are pivotal to the story and make their roles stronger.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: jumping_jiminys

Comments: 1.The nicknames I thought this might have been some batman AU fanfiction.

2. In a way it didn't but that's simply because I thought it was a fanfiction on batman and not an original book. As it's own book I expected to see some familiar troupes and was pleasently surprised that there were hardly any and when there was some the author put their own spin on it.

3.From the story description, it gave some hints to the plot, however not yet established as you read chapter to chapter, which is fine not all plots have to be set immediately.

4. I couldn't relate to them personally. However, they all seemed real in the universe that the author has created. I liked that Charlie was a badass, but so was every other female and it worked in the environment that she was in.

5. The first chapter was a good introduction, let the character reunite get the moods et before all hell's loose.

6.You did well with bringing in the description when necessary. It's hard to describe things for the readers' sake when the character already knows what everything looks like. However, by having Charlie reminisces was a sort of loophole in that problem and simultaneously brought some context to everything before the book.

7. I liked how we were in Charlie's head being able to know her thoughts and feelings about every situation helped me connect with her despite us being two very different people.

8. I noticed they share a series across two accounts, and reading this book makes you want to pick up the others on the other account.

9. The book is undoubtedly unique and brings a different perspective to sometimes very cliche troupes. I didn't see any tense slips, but then again I have that problem too, so I'm probably not the best help XD.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: GreerRivers

Comments: I read to 6.3.

1. Expectations: I wasn't sure what to expect from the blurb. It was elaborate but confusing. I was thinking rival teenage gangs, although when adults showed up I was confused as to why the teens had so much power.

2. Plot: I gather this is a sequel, and I felt like I was missing a lot of key info. It seemed to drag in places until Bane showed up, but I read up to 6.2 and I'm still not sure where the plot intends to go. Every scene that physically included Bane, kept me wanting to read.

3. Characters: One of my problems was that I am unfamiliar w/the Suicide Squad and its relationships. I know Bane and Joker from their respective movies, but I was unable to imagine these characters as fitting their nicknames. Oh! Except for when Asher had a Bane mask, which I thought was badass. As to those nicknames, there were several per character, some similar to others, and sometimes even misspelled, all of which was confusing. The weird mystical mind control w/Bane was intriguing, but not well established and seemed incongruous in a world w/o magic. It felt more like a way to explain why people conveniently got amnesia/deferred to Bane.

4. Pacing: The plot seemed to move, albeit slowly. There were many references to the past I think I was expected to know, almost to the point of hindering the plot's movement. Before Bane shows up, I think the chapters drag, and I'm unsure of their purpose in moving the plot.

5. Description/emotions: The tone was sometimes hard to pinpoint because the characters seemed emotionally hyperbolic, especially in the first few chapters. For ex., Charlie being angry to the point of tears, but in literally the next paragraph grinning and bounding stairs. Although if the intent is to highlight the emotional rollercoaster of a teenager, then I suppose it works.

6. Writer's Style: I thought tension and conflict within each chapter was the author's greatest strength outside of uniqueness. The chapters did feel long for Wattpad, but they still explored tension/conflict. I was always waited for the shoe to drop, even when they were just playing dress-up. But if my estimation is correct, most of the chapters averaged between 4000-7500 words and if there's 84 parts that's a rather long romance novel. I understand that this story is being edited, but it's got a long way to go. The lack of editing, confusing character names, and extensive referencing to unfamiliar backstory all made this story very hard to follow.

7. Read more by this author: To be very honest, I would like to read something well-edited before making that decision, as this one was hard for me to read. However, I'm not sure this piece is something I would continue reading on my own unless Bane and Charlie became monogamous outside of their relationship. I personally don't like multiple partners for main characters in books unless it's a RH situation, and Bane and Charlie referring constantly to having sex with other people wasn't my cup of tea. I also prefer to maintain realism where possible (looking at the child marriage plot/references to DJJ long-term solitary confinement as examples). But my biggest problem was the casual treatment of sexual assault that occurred with James and Harper. 1. It was SA that felt like it was supposed to be a joke to the reader, and 2. Because the FMC had such strong feelings against anything non-consensual and then behaved the way she did. This might not seem like SA to some people, but drugging someone, getting/touching them naked, and "flicking" their private part while they're unconscious is a form of SA and since it was even referenced as a trigger and a strong plot point later in the book I was very surprised that it was treated so casually.

8. Strongest/Weakest: I agree that this is a very unique story w/unique characters. Accomplishing tension and conflict within each chapter was another strength. I didn't notice tense changes being a problem, but there were lots of other editing issues that were hard for me to look past. As for descriptions, I would just say that if this is meant to be readable as a stand-alone in a series, then describe each character as if they're being described for the first time at least once early on and try to stick with only one name when possible. When you enter a setting, describe it as the character would see it when the character sees it. Other than that, I'm not sure I really noticed description problems. 

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: Selly1010

Comments: What the story about? 

At first, I expected the werewolf story, not the gang story.At the first chapter, honestly, I confused with the lot of character appeared at once. And also sometimes the character called with the nickname as some of them have a similar name or nickname so I am very confused to imagine or portray the scene in my head. Sometimes I thought that this was a sequel because there are a lot of backstories that been told in an early chapter so I feel that I missed the story.

Characters: As the story has a lot of chapters and I just read relatively only 10 percent for this review, I can't comment a lot about char development. With the gang life and drug, sex, and others, I assume the characters are mature person, I mean the age at least twenties or thirties. But I read that MC is a teenager (I am sorry if I am wrong). For me, using the teenage character is a bit too force the story.

Theme: The dark theme is fine for me. With this theme, we can explore the story drama, problems, and stake to gain a lot of viewers and readers, however, the first chapter makes readers confuse and maybe some readers will put it down. So with editing and polishing, I believe it will be a good story.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: Daenerys1417

Comments: 1. How many chapters did you read? Three (I read to Chapter 2:1)

2. What did you think the book was about? I wasn't sure, at first, I thought it might be a Suicide Squad fanfic since there are characters named Harley and Joker. I quickly realized that it's an original fic and part of a series. I was a bit worried that I wouldn't understand what was going on since I saw a suggestion that two other books should be read before this one. (Burned by Hellfire and The Wildcards: Book 1) The book seemed to be about a gang war as well as the friendships, rivalries, and romances between its members. The blurb was a bit confusing because it shifted between being author's notes/warnings to the reader and a 1st person dialogue (summary) from the main character. Using line breaks to distinguish which is which would be helpful. I also suggest narrowing its scope without including so many details or mentioning so many different characters since it appears that the story primarily centers around Charlie (main character).

3. Did you feel that the book fulfilled your expectations? Somewhat. I could tell that there was a lot of history between the characters, old romances and love rivalries, all with the backdrop of gang war tensions. However, the entire time I was reading, I felt like I didn't really have the full picture and that I was missing context, most likely because I didn't read the prequels to this story.

4. What about the plot? I could tell that this was an original and complex plot involving a lot of different characters. Good job on the creativity and uniqueness.

5. Do the characters seem real and believable? I thought Charlie seemed real and believable: a bit of a rebel with a rough family life but someone who is fiercely loyal to her friends. The descriptive language used for the other characters mentioned in the first few chapters was good. I'm not a big fan of character guides (picture boards) because I feel that descriptive language and the reader's imagination should be enough to visualize a character, but because there's so many characters in this story and they're all going by multiple names and two of them even almost have the same name (Ash/Asher) I can see how this would be helpful.

6. How was the pacing of the chapters you read? The chapters were very complete and didn't leave me feeling like a scene ended abruptly or anything like that. However, I feel that some of them could have been broken up into smaller chunks for ease of reading.

7. How was the description of the chapters you read? I thought the descriptive language was good and covered character appearance, tone of voice, facial gestures, locations, smells, sounds, etc.

8. Describe what you liked or disliked about the writer's style? I thought the YouTube music videos at the beginning of each chapter was a nice touch and helped to set the mood. I feel that this story needs a lot of work with punctuation, singular vs. plural subjects and verbs, spelling, and run-on sentences. Many of your sentences could be broken up into two sentences instead of connecting so many phrases with commas. (For example: Standing up fully, the dame, correction Iris, her hair in long blonde dreadlocks frowns, "Language Charlie," before pointing to her two-year old daughter playing nearby.)Also, because there were so many characters, it was hard to keep track of who was who. It was made even more difficult by the fact that not only were you jumping from character to character but also interchanging names and nicknames. I feel like in an authentic conversation between old friends, they would refer to and think of each other by one name, whether it's their real name or a nickname. Just my opinion.

9. Would you read more of the author's work? Perhaps a different sort of story that's not part of a series and can stand alone on its own.

10. Comment on their strongest and weakest writing trait along with their help request and give overall thoughts.Your story is definitely unique, and I think that's a strong writing trait to have. You mentioned that you would like to strengthen descriptions, but I think that is strong as well. Writing with the correct tense is something to definitely improve on as well as overall spelling, grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure. It was enough for me to notice and to distract from the story.

Since this book is a series and it's not book #1, I was worried that I would have difficulty connecting to the story, and unfortunately, I was right. Keeping track of all the characters was overwhelming. I don't think this is a stand-alone story that someone can jump into without first reading the books that came before it. While you did provide some background information, I still felt as if I had been dropped into an alternate world where I had no idea of the full relationship and history between characters.

Kudos for coming up with such a vivid and complex story. I hope my feedback can help you with improving as a writer. Thanks for sharing and best of luck.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: BellaFrost1617

Comments: Reading the Shadow Hounds: Twisted Shadows has been incredibly emotional for me. I'll admit that at first I thought the names Joker, Harley, Ivy and Bane meant it was a Batman fan fiction, but that quickly faded as I read on. I've read four chapters, but I'm not sure I can continue at this time. The emotions are so powerful that the end of chapter four had me not only almost in tears for Charlie/Ivy, but also fantasising about burning those horrible people's house down and getting some rather tricky and genius level characters from one of my own books to ruin her mother's election chances for the cruelty. And the grandmother should be locked up for such vile behaviour. As far as I'm concerned, Charlie is the only character in that family who isn't a monster deserving of pain and suffering. I can only hope that the mother, father, brother and pathetic excuse for a would-be boyfriend that isn't getting the message that he isn't wanted all get what they deserve in the end. I can't even express the anger those characters evoked. But then in contrast there was so much happiness and joy in the group as they gave Anika a happy princess birthday. Oh, the lines and the thought of Joker and Jace in dresses had me laughing constantly. 

The Princess Sushi Ball part was hilarious. It's so great to see such happiness in the middle of the darkness that came with the start of the story and that moment where the rotten aristocratic wannabes ruined everything. It offers hope for some joy to come. Of all the guys, only Joker seems stable, which is says something since I couldn't get The Joker out of my head to start with. Ty and Bane just come off as passively abusive in their own ways, which makes me cringe. But that shows how powerful your writing is. Your emotions are brilliant and your descriptions, though you asked for help, are actually pretty good. You were painting pictures in my mind as I read each section, giving me a beautiful understanding of what the characters looked like, the painting Bane made, the colours of the dresses, even the world they live in, which seems so dark and almost dystopian in the suburban perfection of Charlie's nasty family's world. 

And your character creation is well rounded and filled out perfectly. I can feel what Charlie feels and sympathise with her so strongly. She's so relatable and it just feels bewildering that a teenage girl could be put through so much hell by people who know her. But I think that's what makes it relatable. Not all of us go through the kind of pain and abuse, but I doubt there's a person alive today who hasn't been so devastatingly lied to and betrayed by at least one person in their life. I didn't see anything in regards to tense changes really. You maintained your present tense very well and consistently, with the exception of the scene where Bane sneaks into Charlie's room being in third person. Your show rather than tell is great, but with room for improvement, which is always good to have that space, and I'm actually the type of reader who enjoys a good long read with likeable characters. I am curious about Bane's power he seems to have, which makes me wonder on the supernatural aspects that might be present. My only real issue was the amount of nicknames were hard to keep up with at first, but after the first two chapters I got the hang of it. 

Otherwise, just some basic editing to clean up the typical errors that we all have and it wouldn't need a huge amount of work. It's definitely a unique and engaging story with some great quirky attitudes from the principal characters and antagonists readers can truly get behind hating. I also love the ambiguity that some of the male characters have in attitude that leave you wondering whether they'll stay loyal and pull themselves together to improve as people, or whether they'll descend further into darkness and take on villainous roles themselves. Overall, I loved it, even though the emotions could be overwhelming, but that's powerful writing and that's what makes a great author. I hope I'll come back to it and see how it all ends, but for now I'll have to just take a break from reading it. Probably more my mental state and the triggers clashing, but I'm still so compelled by it and would love to see how it all turns out. Brilliant work and if it were a print book I'd buy it.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: KimberlyTanithMarie

Comments: I read the first few chapters and I will have to be honest, it was a bit hard for me to get into the story. Not because the story isn't good. In fact, the plot seemed really interesting, but I felt like there was so much going on that it was really hard to focus on the various interactions.

I love long chapters, but due to the depths and richness of the characters that the author illustrated, I personally felt like a lot of their hard work got lost, as after a while things started to feel a bit muddled, especially in areas where they were large parts of dialogue.

Perhaps they can think about breaking up the chapters a bit? This I believe would really help the flow.

Although since this is a collaborative story, I think that is why I felt like there was a push and pull at times, as sometimes things did not mesh as well as it could have. 

I also noted that it was suggested that we read the first book 'Wildcards' before reading Shadow Hounds, perhaps this is also why I felt lost in some parts as I was missing that initial connection with the characters that I probably would have obtained from reading the first book.

There is just so much going on all at once, perhaps too much at times.All in all, I do think that this book has some interesting characters and with some tweaking, I think that they can really make something good from it.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: ReggaeGirl4

Comments: What kind of bothered me, was the large number of characters. Their interactions were all over the place, that made it hard to follow the story line and stay with it. I understand that in a large group of people, like a gang, in order to understand relationships and dynamics, the characters need to be introduced, but the way the author did it, had me confused.

At that point, please be aware that I'm not a native speaker, and even though I consider myself fluent in English, I might not understand a couple things, like slang and stuff like that. Maybe that influenced my reading experience. 

However, the description of looks, surroundings, and smells were very well written and placed, which made places and characters livelier and more believable. 

I would read more work of that author, because I consider this a good read after all. The author's strongest writing trait is having a understanding of what good writing needs, and it shows in her work. Grammer and punctuation seem fine, the dialogues and the language go well with the gang topic, the story and main character are quite interesting, and there are no gaps in the storyline. Also the whole gang topic seems well researched. The weakest trait is too many characters, who have too much going on. Sometimes I read a name, and was like, "who was that again?" 

At this point, I'd like to say that I got really glued to this story in chapter 2 when Asher climbs into Charlie's room at night. It was super sexy how she reacted to his proximity being asleep. It was intense and I enjoyed it. 

The sex scene un 2:3 between Charlie and Joker was downright erotic and honest as hell. Funny that they shared such great sex and still obviously both imagined Ash someone else. Aside from that, their friendship is heartwarming as they both go through similar things with the person they are in love with. They understand each other, and somehow for me as a reader, who feels with the characters, that was really comforting. 

I'm sorry that my review is all over the place. I'm under a bit of time pressure at the moment, and so I took notes along the way while reading. 

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: LivEvansWrites

Comments: Before writing the review, I have to admit that I didn't read as much of this as I would have liked. I got up to 2:2. Shadow Hounds: Twisted Shadows, is a story about a group of people getting back together after spending a couple of years apart (and with all of the drama that happens in between). I went into this one a little blind, as I started reading the description and got a bit lost in it. There was plenty of detail there (I referred back to it through the reading process), but maybe a little too much.

The start of the first chapter, however, did draw me in. Charlie's voice is distinct and consistent, and I like the narration style used to characterise her. I understand that these characters are part of another universe. That was clear from how much detail there was in them, and how consistently they were written. However, one thing that made this extremely challenging for me was the sheer amount of names and nicknames each character had. I reread far too many paragraphs a dozen times over to figure out who was who on multiple occasions. I know that you have a character guide at the start but, in my personal opinion, a reader shouldn't have to flip between a chapter and a character guide to figure out who is who. Given that so many of the main characters are introduced quite early on, this made it even harder. I know it is pretty realistic to have multiple nicknames for each character, but when it comes to the narration, there needs to be far more consistency in order to make it a more accessible story line for readers. I will be the first to admit that I have a terrible memory at the best of times, so it could just be me, but I really struggled to read through at a decent pace because of this.

Also, another thing that had me re-reading, was the fact that I wasn't sure if this was a fanfic for the first couple of chapters. The use of well-known nicknames for the main characters, all in combination, really made it confusing. Having Joker or Harley on their own would be fine, but when you throw in Bane and Ivy, in addition to their other nicknames, it is a little overwhelming.

Now that is out of the way, there are so many positives. The characters themselves, as I mentioned above, are wonderfully fleshed out. There is so much going on in this world, that it is rich and immersive right away. Your descriptions work, but the strength in these authors really lies in how they give each character a motivation, flaws, and some way to connect with them. One reason that I'm so disappointed I didn't get to read much further is because I really wanted to know what these young people (they are 17, right?) had gone through to get were they were. You gave away some of this with Charlie/Charlotte/Ivy/Little Fox and Wilder/Wild/Trick/Joker. Given the content of the recalls, you handled it well.

For the most part, the prose was well-written. There were some issues a couple of times with homophones, but it is nothing that a quick run-through to edit couldn't help. All teeny mistakes that didn't effect the reading quality. The other thing I might suggest, and I hate being 'that' person, is that some of the paragraphs were quite long. I think that it might be advantageous to split it up a little more for readability and to preserve the integrity of the dialogue tags. For example, having the MC reminisce about someone while they are talking, once the MC's memories begin, then it feels like the character needs to have their dialogue starting on a new line and appropriately tagged, so it doesn't become convoluted.

The pacing of the story is well done. I like how you don't rush through things. You take your time to really let the story tell itself. That doesn't happen too often on Wattpad, and I think you've both nailed it. I didn't really pick up on any tense change problems and think the only real way to strengthen descriptions is with more info about the scenery. However, you do this when necessary, and given how character and drama heavy the main text is, I wouldn't push to add more to it. I think the style you use suits what you're writing, so no need to change.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: PixieStormcrow

Comments: I have to say the book completely took me by surprise in multiple ways. The title and covers all seemed to be mismatched and threw me off. The title had led me to believe that it was a paranormal boom while the cover made me think it was some futuristic Ready Player One/Sword Art Online type story. Then as I tried to read the blurb, I just got completely confused. I would say out of everything,those three aspects of the book are the weakness.

Because once I cracked open the book, WOW.At first I was worried about it being Book 2, that I would have a hard time following and indeed, in chapter one, I got really confused with who:s who. But as I read on and finely caught on to the referenced, I quickly got to know the entire cast in such a way that every character was memorable. Given how many characters there are, that is no small feat! 

Everything about this book came alive for me in plot, romance, background and characterization. I cannot give enough praise in those areas. The "world" the authors built us vivid, visceral and brutal in its beauty. I may have found some of the ages around previous alluded events disturbing but I am reminded that so much of the real world is that way too. I think the authors have handled and treated such hard topics with enough respect that I didn't find it uncomfortable. There was in some ways, no romanticizing these hard hitting topics, just a naked and raw truth to them, at least from my point of view.

If I had to offer some minor suggestions, I would say that perhaps the intricate world building went into too much detail at times (like some of the descriptions) while there are technically some awkward sentences and misused words but I know editing is in progress. Be wary of clauses that don't relate or share a subject with the rest of the sent me (ex. Stand up, she's....") But these are very minor.

This is more for consideration but if the authors are considering publishing the series, they may run into some copyright issues with the usage of the DC characters. I love them, but such heavy usage even with attribution may still be a problem. It would be something to inquire with an expert in the field.All in all, I thoroughly enjoyed the story and would like to commend the authors of an incredible piece of storytelling.

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

Reviewer: Natalieemm15

Comments: 1) What did you think the book was about?I personally thought the book was about a woman navigating through her experiences within the Shadow Hounds. At first I assumed it was a motorcycle gang, but I wasn't certain from the blurb until I began reading.

2) Did you feel the book fulfilled your expectations?I had no expectations but I was pleasantly surprised by the flow of the story. Some works can be difficult to read if the flow is off, but I like the author's use of dialogue tags, breaks, and I think dialogue is the author's strongpoint.

3) What about the plot? Does it pull you in? Or did you have to force yourself to read the book?So one thing I noticed with the first chapter is that we're not really getting Charlie's motivations. I think that the first chapter would benefit from introducing why she's been in Boston, or maybe adding a little bit more about why she's decided to come back, or to let us into her head a bit more. It seems like I'm reading more about the events that are happening but not really following the MC's thought process.

4) Do the characters seem real and believable?The characters are very believable. Ash, Charlie, and Trick have a strong established relationship and I like the fact that the MC's friends are introduced early on, but as I mentioned before, I think that Charlie's motivations for returning to the gang should be expounded upon a bit more. I would like to understand why she's come back. Does she just miss her friends? Is there a reason she left in the first place? More backstory would be good, but without info dumping too much at a time.

5) How was the pacing of the chapters?One thing I think could improve pacing of the chapters is establishing a clear direction for the story and the plot. The story should be moving in the direction of an established plot and at times, I felt as though I wasn't quite sure where the story was going exactly. I like the events where Charlie is spending time with her friends, but I like to know that those events will contribute to an overall plot and they felt as though they kind of just existed to give the reader information about the characters.

6) How was the description of the chapters?There's nothing wrong with the description of the characters themselves. I think that readers can get a good idea of what the characters look like, but I like how we get to know about Ash through Charlie's experiences with her. I don't need to read a description about how Ash is free spirited or adventurous because I can tell that by reading about her hopping up on the stripper pole, and her willingness to drastically change her hair color. So that's one thing I think the author should keep doing— letting us meet characters gradually through their actions.

7) Describe what you like and dislike about the writer's style.I firstly like that the dialogue is strong between the characters. It's evident that they've known each other for a long time, they possess a shared history, and it's also evident that Charlie's friends are a bit complicit in her poor decisions because in a way they enable her addictions (very in-keeping with gang life though, that's common in groups). The thing I dislike is that sometimes the author adds too much of one thing, but not enough of another. For instance, in the second chapter when Charlie is talking to Trick, she sort of runs off on a tangent about her struggles at her grandmothers and offers way too much information in one sitting. While this is how we'd talk in real life, novel dialogue should be a tad bit more formal. The thing about it, is it doesn't read formal, but it is more cleaned up. For example, while we might speak in run on sentences in real life. Dialogue in a story shouldn't follow that.

8) Would you read more of the author's work? Yes, I would. I'm a firm believer that writer's improve with each work they do. And while an older project may not be as strong, I love reading author's works and seeing the growth.

9) Strongest Writing Trait: Creativity, Concept, Character Development. Weakest Writing Trait: Organization, Plot development. 

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Reviewer: JamesEnd49

Comments: Dear Reading_Mermaid08: 

I was very excited to get going on your read. The plot seemed intensely loaded with potential, but then being the sequel??, to a previous book I had not read, I had trouble picking up the tread, and feel like I failed. Sorry. I only got through chapter three (part 7) of your offering.

As for the story: I liked the idea, gangland feud in Baltimore, a city I have never visited. I didn't understand that the Wildcards are a subset of the Shadow Hounds? and never did get to the point of knowing who the Twisted Skulls were. In setting up your story, I felt that the pictures offered are too white-bread to be believable. They all looked like they belong in a KPop band, not a gang. Maybe the images need to be changed or left out so that the reader can develop them in their own minds. 

Second: I had difficulty accepting that these characters have developed this level of bad-assedness. Think your story line might benefit from some flashbacks that fill in the experiences that brought these characters to their level of detactedness from regular human behavior or maybe I am too isolated. Don't know your background, and maybe you did all that in your previous SH book/s??

Third: (and again, it may just be me) I really couldn't keep up with all the nicknames. The constant shift of names left me challenged to stay up with your story without printing out the AKA list, and having them in-front of me to reference. This lead me to skipping over large sections of dialog and picking out the line of the story, as best I could. Check with your target audience and see, if they are able to stay with, and this may be a non-issue, but for me (older! I know) audience, I found it challenging.

Finally: I found the length of your story daunting. The chapters are long and don't seem to progress (maybe I don't have the patience for a lot of young angst-based dialog). I think you have this great story in your mind and have this fantasy about the lives and conversations of these characters that you have developed in great detail, but I would do some serious editing and break the book into smaller, more approachable pieces so that the average public can join you on the journey.

Best wishes: James 

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Reviewer: EllenFairyBlue4

Comments: I honestly couldn't quite get into Shadow Hounds. I understood what's happening but the multiple names is what really threw me off. It's ok to have different names for different people bit you have to introduce them a certain way. Besides that big issue, the story itself does seem interesting. I'm curious about the different characters interaction. It seem like you have a lot of side plots that intertwine into the story but like I said keeping up with the many names really confused me. You also had a lot of big paragraphs that could be shortened up into smaller ones. As a first draft this is pretty good. You have your story down. Sorry for the short feedback bit I couldn't get into the story. 

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