"blood is the only thing that we share and it's certainly not strong enough to save us"

*

A black curl tumbled into Regulus' tired eyes. He brushed it away impatiently before repositioning his fingers on the keys and continuing the song. The ivories and ebonies tinkled in the empty living room as he played a Tchaikovsky piece from years ago. Downstairs, a few of his visiting cousins milled about from dinner, but he evaded them, claiming to feel faint. It wasn't exactly a lie. He truly believed that the next time he heard Bellatrix's cackle, he might pass out.

Ever since Kreacher left, he'd been on edge. He couldn't get the image of his brother's helpless form on the ground out of his mind. It haunted him. He'd learned that they both survived, Eva barely, but that didn't change how much that mission shook his belief in his cause. All of these death... what for?The Dark Lord was power hungry, ready to sacrifice anyone who stood in his way. The boy wasn't ready to desert, but he was worried. Besides, there was no leaving Lord Voldemort's command alive.

In the corner sat a half-packed trunk. It would be a relief to go back to Hogwarts in a week. At least at Hogwarts, he could claim a couch in the Slytherin common room and read without being interrupted by his parents' screaming. At least at Hogwarts, he could go to prefect meetings and pretend he wasn't alone. Besides, he'd been made Head Boy this year, a small comfort that made him not feel like a complete failure.

For once, all was quiet in the world of Regulus Black.

"THAT DIRTY LITTLE BLOOD TRAITOR!"

Resting his elbows on the piano, Regulus put his head in his hands and groaned. His contact with the keys created a dissonance so uncomfortably dark that he pulled away.

His footsteps on the staircase echoed in the empty hallways of 12 Grimmauld Place as he walked down to see what all the fuss was about. 'That dirty little blood traitor' tended to be his mother's pet name for her estranged eldest son, so he assumed it had to do with him.

Everything always had to do with him. Even when they were younger, Sirius' rebellious behavior outshined Regulus' obedience every single time. What was the point of being good if no one noticed your efforts?

His relatives were crowded around the the Black family tree on the wall of te drawing room, dating all the way back to the Middle Ages. He scanned it, searching in confusion for any unfamiliarities, and he found one towards the bottom of the tapestry.

Eva Brandi Black née Taylor

"Oh damn," he muttered under his breath, his eyebrows rising as he understood what must have happened. He knew it would happen sooner or later, but this was a lot sooner than he expected. Narcissa shot him a concerned look.

He felt a pang in his heart because he missed their wedding, but after everything that had happened between them, he didn't feel like he deserved an invitation.

"How dare he?" Mrs. Black seethed, glaring around at them all like they could give her answers. "Besmirching our sacred name with filthy blood like hers?"

Bellatrix glowered at the name, already mostly singed off. Mrs. Black had already seen to that. "It's obvious, Aunt Walburga. He's looking for yet another way to bring us shame."

"As if his mere existence wasn't enough," Lucius added with an eye roll.

Regulus traced the line connecting Eva's name with Sirius' skeptically. "How long has this been here?"

"None of us know. It could have been here for weeks now. No one's been in here." Mr. Black was the only one in the room except for his son with a relatively calm demeanor. He sat on an armchair, kicked up his feet on a cushion, and lit a cigar. "Walburga, why are you even surprised? He doesn't care about any of us or our reputations."

"I'm not surprised, Orion." She spat his name like venom. Things between Regulus' parents had been... tense as of late. He'd been spending less and less time at home, deciding that wandering dangerous streets of London at night was safer than being in the house while his parents argued. "I'm greatly irritated. There's a difference. I don't expect someone as clueless as you to hear that, though."

"All I hear is the droning wail of a crabby old woman."

Oh shit. Regulus knew their argument definitely wouldn't end well, so he claimed that he was feeling faint again and escaped upstairs.

"They're married," he muttered, trying to decide how he felt about it. Eighteen seemed too young for something so eternal, but maybe starting an infinity early just ensured a longer one. Besides, everyone was eloping nowadays. "They're actually married."

He had a sister now.

One that probably hated his guts.

What else is new? Inter-family hatred was a defining feature of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. Welcome to the family. It sucks.

Letting out a long sigh, Regulus sat down at the piano once again, this time playing much quieter. Sirius wasn't the only one who knew Muggle music, after all. After a few Barry Manilow songs, he switched back to classical pieces and began to sing softly in French. Both of the Black sons learned the language from a young age and could speak it as fluently as their English. Sirius always complained about how stupid French vowels and how pretentious French people were, but Regulus loved being bilingual. Back when they were close, they used to get into heated arguments at school about a multitude of things and it was common to see the Black brothers shouting rapid-fire French vulgarities at each other in the halls of Hogwarts.

A loud crack startled the boy. He whipped his fingers off of the keys and turned around, his eyes widening when he saw Kreacher.

'What took you so long?" He demanded worriedly. "It's been weeks!"

"M-M-Master R-Regulus."

The house elf trembled violently from head to foot. Regulus couldn't decide if it was from fear or the cold because Kreacher was also soaking wet. He looked absolutely terrified.

"Are you okay?" Regulus grabbed a blanket off of one of the couches and gave it to him.

He shook his head, his body still shaking. "M-Master-"

Slowly, Regulus lowered himself onto the ground in front of him, dread settling in his stomach. "What happened?"

*

Eva curled up on the couch, grinning as she flipped through a notebook to find an empty page. The sketches of Hogwarts and flowers and her friends brought back fond memories. She and Sirius, or 'the half-decent Blacks', as they had taken to calling themselves, arrived home for a few days ago after spending most of August in the United States, a month they both agreed was the best of their lives.

"Okay, so we're having this small fake wedding party thing in a week," she said, thinking out loud. "It'll still be far enough away from the full moon that Remus will be feeling okay. Kriss can sneak back here for the night, she already checked the date. Lily's my fake maid of honor. I'm guessing James for fake best man, right?"

"I don't think 'fake' is the right word. More like 'belated'. He's the belated best man. She's the belated maid of honor." Sirius winked. Eva quickly scribbled that down on her list. He filled a glass of water and gave Francis a long drink before sitting next to her and putting an arm around her shoulders. "Wedding party is obvious. No one's allowed to look super fancy or we're kicking them out. Prongs said they'd handle most of the details. We just have to make a mixtape, show up, and look pretty."

"Done," she joked. "Except for the mixtape, I guess. But that's easy. You just need to trim your hair."

"What, you don't like it-" he flipped his hair dramatically, "-this beautiful?"

"It tickles my nose. It is handsome, though." She winked at him.

"Hey Blondie?" Sirius leaned his head on her shoulder, purposefully tickling her nose with his flowing locks. "What did James want earlier? When he pulled you out of the apartment when we were all eating lunch, I mean."

A smile spread across her face before she could hide it, though she knew she'd never be able to mask it even if she tried. "Nothing."

"Come on!"

"He just needed help with something. That's all."

"With what?"

She pretending to zip her lips. "With a surprise."

"You're killing me, Evaaaaaaaaaaaaaa," he groaned, drawing out her name until he ran out of breath. Then he did it again. And again. And again. This went on until Eva whacked him with the notebook to shut him up.

"Oi! I'm still sore from McKinnon's punch. Take it easy on your poor husband!" Upon arriving home, Marlene had slapped him across the face because he got married without her.

"It's called a surprise for a reason, you idiot."

"Would it have anything to do with a certain piece of jewelry Prongs dropped some serious coin on last week?"

She gasped. "How did you know about that?"

"He's the world's worst secret keeper, Eva. Don't you remember 'phoenixes in order' thing?" They shared a laugh. "Nah, the day we got back, the four of us went out for drinks, but before that, he made us help pick one out. We all voted on the winner. It's nice."

"Good. She deserves it." Eva fiddled with her own wedding band, simple and gold. "She will say yes, right? I'm just saying, she has years of practice for turning him down."

"She'd better say yes," Sirius growled, fake cracking his knuckles in intimidation. "I think she will. James is kind of obnoxious, but she knows that and she's still dating him, so why not keep him forever at this point?"

"He gave me a ten-minute lecture when we got back, you know. Saying all about how inconvenient our marriage is because he needs a new backup now."

"Well, let's hope he doesn't need a backup," Sirius said with a shrug. "Besides, if worst comes to worst, he can be lonely with Peter. He'll be a bachelor until he's old and gray."

Eva frowned. She started to braid her hair. "Does he like Mary or not? I can't tell."

"Of course he likes Mary. He's liked her for a year now, but he's never going to do anything about it. He's taking it so slow with her that it might as well not be happening at all. It's like he's drag racing a grandma and giving the old dear a head start."

She bumped his shoulder and said, "you're so stupid."

"I'm also yours. For-ev-er!"

A knock at the door interrupted her mind from firing back a witty retort. Eva glanced at the clock. Well past eleven. Usually, no one came to see them that late.

"Wands out, d'ya reckon?" Sirius asked quietly as he stood.

She raised her eyebrows. "Would someone who wanted to hex or kill us knock?"

"I dunno. Maybe Voldemort's sneak-attacking us. Reverse psychology, you know."

"Shut up."

Eva got up from the couch but Sirius nudged her backward, just in case. He opened the door to find his younger brother, who looked worse than he'd ever seen him. They just stared at each other.

"Reg?" Eva whispered, eyes wide. "You look terrible. What-?"

"Nope," Sirius interrupted. "Nope. He's not allowed here." He tried to shut the door but Eva pulled him off and quickly waved the boy in.

"Sirius," she said quietly. He either didn't hear her or ignored her.

"I came here because I didn't know where else to go," Regulus murmured. His face was a bloodless paperwhite, his curls disheveled, and his dark blue eyes were dilated in fear. "I need your help."

"No."

"Come on," he pleaded.

"No."

"We're brothers!"

Sirius glared, his gray eyes dark and stormy like the sky before a torrential downpour. "Are we really? At this point, are we? I don't think most brothers have the same kind of relationship that we do."

"Stop being a jerk! I need to talk to you!"

"Oh, you've got something to say?" Sirius laughed coldly. He had no sympathy left to spare his younger brother. "What? That you wouldn't have killed me to save your own neck? That if it came down to my life or yours, you would have hesitated? And you still have the nerve to come to me for help?"

Regulus glanced down at his shoes, regretting the decision to come. This was why he always worked alone. In his pocket was the scrap of paper his brother gave him years ago, a scribbled address on one side. At one point, it might have been a sanctuary. Now, it was anything but. He missed that window of opportunity by a long shot.

"Sirius, I don't like this either, but let's just hear him out," Eva whispered nervously, her fingers brushing her wand on the kitchen table. This time, he ignored her completely.

"What happened to all your Death Eater pals? Or our beloved family? I thought Lord Voldemort was mighty enough to protect you."

The mention of the Dark Lord struck a nerve in Regulus and he stiffened. Sirius didn't notice this, but Eva did, and it worried her. "I can't tell them. They wouldn't understand."

"And I will?"

Regulus fell silent.

"Always looking out for number one," Sirius spat, taking a step towards his younger brother. Eva grabbed his hand but he shook her off. "That's how you roll, right? No one else matters as long as you get to live another day in your pathetic Pureblood life, huh?

"Don't act like you understand me," he snapped. All of the bottled up hatred and fear from over the years started to pour out of him. "You have no idea what it's like being me and you don't give a damn to find out!"

"Oh, you're the tragic little hero now, huh? Give me a break!" Rage was practically radiating off of Sirius in waves. "You're a coward, that's what you are. Because you claim to care for us, but you wouldn't have blinked an eyelash if your stupid Death Eater buddies killed us just to keep your own arse safe!"

"Sirius, stop it!" Eva begged. She sounded close to tears.

"No. You almost died, Blondie, and it was because of him," he said, jabbing a finger in Regulus' direction. "He knew! I'll say whatever the hell I want about him and to him because it's not happening again. People don't mess with my family and get away with it."

Regulus' grip on the armrest tightened, creasing the fabric. This was it. He'd finally shattered the bond between them. He, Regulus, was no longer considered family to his older brother.

"You don't have to like me! Hate me all you want! I just want to talk to you, you bloody idiot! I need your help! It's important, and Mum and Dad can't know! I need you to listen to me, Merlin!"

"What do you want me to say?" Sirius yelled. "What? What is it?"

"I don't know!" Regulus yelled back, finally losing his composure. "I don't know!"

"Yeah? Well, you'd better fucking figure it out, Reg, because we're living day to day and your decisions actually mean something now. It's not playtime anymore! If you need a reminder of that, look at your damn tattoo! I'm not going to keep tricking myself into believing you're just misguided to make myself feel better! I'm done sticking my neck out for you! You're selfish and you're cruel and if you dropped dead I wouldn't care!"

"You shut up!" Regulus shouted. "You paint yourself like a right little saint and you attack me for my mistakes! At least I'm here, aren't I? Don't you think I'd rather be anywhere else? I went to Andromeda first and she threw me out! You two are all I have left! You always had friends that were like family. You had someone you could safely run away to! I only had you, and you know what you did? You ran! You took the easy way out and left me to deal with our shitty family all by myself! Maybe that's why I always look out for myself! Because no one else fucking does! I stayed and you ran, so who's really the coward here?"

There was a beat of silence. Sirius stood and glowered at his brother, breathing heavily. Regulus glared right back, blue-hot fire in his eyes, but behind that was a trace of brokenness. Tears streamed down Eva's face as she looked at the pair, so alike in appearance, so different in everything else.

"Get out of my apartment."

Regulus swallowed thickly. He had nowhere else to turn. Sirius and Eva always represented a safety net to him, a place that he could go and let out his emotions. His only other real friends were Narcissa, who could never know, and Kreacher, who already knew all too well.

"Sirius, please-"

"Get. Out." Sirius' voice cracked and he hated himself for the words he said next. "I swear if you ever come near me or her ever again, I'll kill you."

He turned around so he didn't have to see his brother leave.

Sirius walked into the kitchen and gripped the granite countertops so hard that his knuckles turned white and leaned over.

Eva hesitated before following him. Wiping tears off of her cheeks, she whispered, "Sirius?"

Without warning, he engulfed her in a tight embrace. She hugged him back, running her fingers through his hair in an attempt to calm him down. To her horror, his entire body shook as he began to sob weakly onto her shoulder. He never cried. She'd only ever seen him cry three times. One, that night in the common room when he apologized for ignoring her letters. Two, when he had a breakdown in their third year after a particularly bad nightmare and she stayed up all night trying to calm him down. And three, after Lily saved her from dying in St. Mungo's.

"Shhh," she whispered soothingly as she attempted to control her own tears as well. "Sirius-"

"He was my brother," he managed to get out, his voice pitiful. "My little brother! I took beatings for him! I loved him! Damnit, how did it get to... this?"

Her heart broke all over again. "It's not your fault," she whispered, lifting his face gently in her hands. His eyes met hers and she knew he would hang onto every word she uttered. "None of this is. He made his own choice and so did you. You're both adults. His decision isn't your fault."

"I said all those things to him," Sirius muttered hoarsely, his eyes rimmed in red. "He's my brother, Eve. I wish I could forgive him, but I keep giving him chances and I'm wrong ever single damn time! I can't keep letting him in."

"You did what you thought was right."

"I just... I can't lose you." Reaching up, he took one of Eva's hands and kissed the palm, his grip on her still shaky. "I can't. You almost died. I don't know what I would have done if-"

"No ifs." She put a finger to his lips. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

Sirius looked at her intently for a moment, then buried his head in her shoulder, a vulnerability he showed to very few. Eva just held him tightly as tears streamed down both of their faces.

angst angst fluff angst angst

anyway, hope you don't hate me too much after this chapter

QOTD: favorite ice cream flavor?

AOTD: coffee or peanut butter

predictions? thoughts? random?