"thank you for being a safe place to turn to"

*

Nov. 2, 1992

Dear Remus,

It's 2:36 at night and I can't sleep. I couldn't sleep last night, either, or the night before. It's so stupid, but all of the lights are on in my bedroom. I don't want to be alone in the dark right now. I'm sitting on my bed, wrapped in blankets and writing you a letter because I just wish I could talk to you for five minutes. It makes me feel a little less alone. 

The Chamber of Secrets has been opened. There was writing on the wall today. Someone wrote it in blood. Mrs. Norris was petrified, and even Dumbledore seems perplexed. You know the whole legend, I'm sure. Slytherin wanted to purge the school of all Muggle-Borns. I'm scared for my students. As selfish as it is, I'm scared for myself. None of this feels like a coincidence anymore. My conversation with Lucius Malfoy, showing the kids my scar, and now, this. I don't know what's happening, but I feel like it's bigger than us. It's always been bigger than us. Do you ever wish our world was smaller?

Tomorrow is Sirius' birthday.

I'm so sorry that I wrote that. I think I might be going mad. Honestly, I need a tight hug, and I need sleep. Neither is going to happen anytime soon.

Love,
Eva

*

Nov. 13, 1992

Eve,

I hope you're sleeping better now. More than anything, I wish I was there with you, or that you were here. I'm so sorry you're going through all of this by yourself. It's not at all fair, but when has life ever been fair to us?

I'm writing to you to procrastinate grading papers. I have about a million essays on why Romeo had it coming sitting in a messy stack on my desk. Six chocolate bars and a butterbeer later, I'm still just as uninspired, so they'll have to wait for a while. We just started "Julius Caesar" about a week ago. Your favorite Shakespeare, right? You told me that once. I'm still a fool for "Romeo and Juliet," though I think romance is an overrated aspect of life.

It snowed for the first time today. Real pretty, sort of like a cliche Christmas card. I'll send a picture back with Ringo. Maybe some cookies, too, if I think he can carry them. It's starting to get debatable. Have you ever thought about giving him a pension?

Hang in there, Eves. You're the strongest person I know.

Your friend,
Remus

*

Dec. 21, 1992

Dear Remus,

I'm so sorry that I'm not going to be home for Christmas this year. It just feels wrong to leave Hogwarts now. What if something happens when I'm gone? I'm worried about Harry. He doesn't seem like himself this year. Multiple students have already been petrified. Frankly, it's terrifying. 

You know what else is terrifying? Gilderoy Lockhart. The man never. stops. smiling. It's creepy! And he pops out of random corners with the worst pickup lines in the history of pickup lines. Even you were a better flirt, back in the day. Why is he so popular? I just don't understand it. At the first meeting of the dueling club, he called me "baby" and I nearly punched him in his perfect face.

The only good to come from this is a weird understanding with Severus. It might be a friendship, but I'm not quite sure. It's more of an alliance built on mutual hate for Gilderoy. The three of us are at least twenty years younger than the rest, but both Severus and I refuse to buddy up with the blond buffoon, so we spend a lot of time hiding from him in the staff room and grading papers. It feels kind of nice to put the past behind us.

I hope you're happy, whatever's going on now. Give Newt and Queenie extra hugs for me. You three are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Love,
Eva

*

Jan. 6, 1993

Eve,

Happy New Year! I have no resolutions because I'm perfect as is.

We missed you here for Christmas, but I completely understand your reasons for staying. If I was in your position, I'd be doing exactly what you're doing now.

I'm already counting down the days until summer. Not that I don't enjoy my job, because I do, but it's starting to get boring. I need a change. If I had the money, I'd go get my doctorate, but I'm not in the mood to be in debt for the rest of my existence, so maybe I'll just go on a nice vacation. Or maybe I'll go skydiving. (I can already hear you yelling at me, so just to confirm, I was kidding. Ha ha, I'm hysterical). Hey, want to go to the Olympics? They're in Barcelona this summer. Might be fun.

Listen to some Elton John songs. They're the chocolate of music. Trust me, you'll feel better.

Your friend,
Remus

*

Jan. 10, 1993

Dear Remus,

THEY CANCELLED QUIDDITCH. JUST FLAT-OUT CANCELLED IT! I GET IT, BUT STILL! HOW'S OLIVER SUPPOSED TO GET AN OFFER TO PLAY PRO QUIDDITCH LIKE HE DESERVES IF NO SCOUTS CAN COME TO SEE HIM PLAY? THIS IS MADNESS!

Love and general irritation,
Eva

*

Jan. 16, 1993

Eve,

I'm sorry. If he's as good as you say, it'll work out for him. Try not to let it ruin your week, because I know you care too much and it will.

Your friend,
Remus

*

Jan. 28, 1993

Dear Remus,

Today was the fourteenth time that Gilderoy asked me out. I'm running out of polite ways to say "you disgust me, get out of my face!" Any tips? Is my replacement at DeHaan flirtatious to the point of vomit-inducing? If the pattern continues and Gilderoy miraculously gets the boot, I shudder at the idea of Dumbledore's next hire.

I have a new favorite song, by the way. "Bed of Roses" by Bon Jovi. The lyrics are so real that they hurt, but I love it. I'd highly recommend listening, and we both know that I have IMPECCABLE music taste. Also, I really want to get tickets to see Bon Jovi now. Hint hint.

I wish I had good things to write. Hogwarts is getting worse every day. The Board of Directors just suspended Dumbledore and sent Hagrid to Azkaban. AZKABAN, Rem, all for something I know he didn't do. I tried to stop them, but they said that I was "biased" when it came to the subject, and Malfoy threatened my job again. I cried all night. I couldn't help it.

My students are starting to get paranoid, and the teachers keep giving me odd looks. They think I don't notice, but I do. I also noticed that they never leave me alone in the staff room anymore. Someone (usually Severus or McGonagall), hangs behind for a while. As terrible as the situation is, it's nice that they care. 

I extended my office hours again like I did last year for the second term. Exam prep, you know. I think most of them just come because they're scared. I let them come because I am, too, and it feels good to have some kind of control. I've always been a protector. It's in my nature, Rem. I have to fight for people.

I'm so sick of feeling weak and helpless, but I'm at a loss. No one knows who's been striking against the Muggle-Borns. If this continues, they might shut Hogwarts down. Please pray for us all. Four students have been petrified. I'm worried out of my mind.

Love,
Eva

*

Feb. 12, 1993

Eve,

Happy 33rd birthday! How insane is that, huh? You're practically ancient. I hope you like my present. Summer's looking up, hm? I'm thinking a quiet few months will be just what we need. You'll be back to yourself by next term, and there won't be anything insane going on by then. 

Update on your and Bert's love story, by the way. You two eloped and moved to Southern France. You paint custom harmonicas now, and his father, the CEO of the plastic utensil company, has put a price on Bert's head because he just wants to retire to Florida already and he needs someone to be CEO. You two aren't having it, though. That's too conventional.

I've got to go grade essays. Why did I assign so many of them in the first place? Enjoy your day.

Your friend,
Remus

*

Feb. 24, 1993

Eve,

Are you doing okay? I haven't heard from you since January. Maybe that's just me being paranoid. Hopefully, Ringo didn't perish on the journey with my letters. I'm sure you're just busy. It's exam season after all, but humor me. Please write back.

Remus

*

March 1, 1993

Eve,

You still haven't written back. It's been a while. No one's told me anything, so I'm guessing you're all right, but I don't like having to guess. Write back.

Remus

*

March 4, 1993

Eve,

Tomorrow's the moon. My head feels like it's going to explode and I'd like nothing more than to pass out on the couch, but I can't stop thinking about you. Please write back. I don't know what else to do.

Remus

*

March 10, 1993

Eve,

WRITE BACK.

new update! i hope you liked this chapter :)

i'm getting really excited for what's coming soon in this book...