Smoke

   HINDI ako pumunta sa mansyon ng mga Altamirano at may iniiwasan akong kapamilya nila. Dustin texted me if I was going, but I told him I would pass today because I had to go somewhere.

But the truth was, I had no intention of going anywhere. Ayoko lang talaga pumunta sa kanila dahil paniguradong nandoon na naman ang nakatatanda niyang kapatid.

I don't want to see Dwight's attractive face! Wala akong mukhang ihaharap sa kaniya pagkatapos ng nangyari kagabi!

Ugh! Naiinip ako! Wala akong magawa maliban sa paghilata buong maghapon!

I need to do something, or my brain will explode in pure boredom!

I quickly got out of bed and entered my walk-in closet. I took a crop top denim jacket and a baseball cap. I wore the jacket and picked a bag from my bag collection. Pinasok ko sa loob ng bag ang baseball cap bago ako bumaba.

"Dawson!" I called my bodyguard the moment my legs reached the living room.

"Yes? Do you need something, Miss?" Dawson entered the house.

Dawson doesn't look like a bodyguard. He was wearing long black sleeves, a white necktie, and a black chino. Kung wala lang siyang suot na wired earpiece, iisipin mong modelo siya.

"Samahan mo ako sa mall. We have to restock the pantry na," I said.

He nodded, "I have to call Chief General Robinhood first before we head straight to the mall," he informed me.

I nodded in understanding, "Okay, call him first."

"Yes, Miss."

I sat on the couch and rested my back while waiting for him to finish talking to my father. Nasa trabaho na sina Popsi, Ruru at balik eroplano na si Rere kaya't ako na naman ang naiwan mag-isa sa bahay.

[Ingatan mo ang prinsesa ko, Dawson. May tiwala ako sa 'yo. Pero kapag may nangyaring masama sa anak ko, uubusin ko ang lahi mo. Naiintindihan mo ba?]

Napangiwi ako nang marinig ko ang pag-uusap nina Dawson at Popsi sa phone. Popsi and his filthy mouth! They talked more for a few seconds before I saw Dawson hiding his phone behind his chinos.

I stood up and sighed.

"Hey, I'm sorry about Popsi. He was just really protective about me," I told Dawson. "Don't mind what he said. Nagbibiro lang 'yon,"

"He was serious, Miss Rara," Dawson disagreed with my statement. "But I understand where he's coming from,"

My bottom lip puckered, "Maybe you're sanay na... well, same." I chortled. "Let's go na!"

Tumango lang siya at pinauna na akong lumabas. Dawson opened the door for me before he jogged to the other side. Dahil ang random lang nang pagpunta ko sa mall para mamili, wala akong listahan ng mga bibilhin.

So, while we were heading to the mall, I listed the things to buy on my phone. I stopped typing on the phone when I noticed that we had already arrived at the mall. Inalis ko ang seatbelt sa akin at sinuot sa ulo ang dala kong baseball cap.

"Meat section first, then we will buy fruits, vegetables and snacks..."

He only nodded quietly.

Dawson grabbed a cart and pushed it to follow wherever I went. As I said, we went to the meat section first and put frozen foods in our cart. Then, we went to the fruits and vegetables section. I asked Dawson to help me with the fruits and vegetables as they were in bulk.

"Are these enough?" he asked.

"Remove the kiwi. No one eats kiwi at home," I said, and he nodded in response.

Nang matapos kami sa fruit and vegetable section, lumipat naman kami sa bread and sweets section. I picked a lot of biscuits, chocolates and junk food. Kapag may nagustuhan ako pero hindi ko abot, si Dawson ang kumukuha para sa akin.

"May gusto ka bang bilhin? Put it on our cart, I'll pay for it," I offered.

He looked at me then he shook his head. "Nothing,"

"Sure ka? Huwag ka mahiya sa akin,"

"Wala akong gustong bilhin, Miss."

Napanguso ako't napaisip, "Mahilig ka sa coffee?" Tanong ko.

"Yes, Miss."

"Great! Let's buy coffee!"

"Huwag na, Miss—"

I quickly ran to the beverages section. Dawson was left stressed in the hallway. I was grinning while looking for a coffee that I think he would like.

Nasa gano'n akong kalagayan nang may marinig akong boses hindi kalayuan sa akin.

[I'm at the mall. Yes, I am restocking the food at my condo. No, she didn't come today. I'll see her next time]

I caught my breath, and my eyes widened when I recognized the man talking to someone on that phone. It was no other than Dwight Altamirano!

My adrenaline rushed through my veins. He's not allowed to see me!

I panicked and just grabbed whatever my hand could grab, but the coffee packs quickly fell from the shelf. I shut my eyes as I hurriedly tried grabbing them all at once and stuffed them back.

"Do you need help?" I heard him ask me.

Bakit siya lumapit?!

I shook my head silently, but Dwight didn't listen, and he helped me with the remaining coffee packs on the floor.

"You look familiar," his voice was curious.

My eyes widened, and my heart pounded loudly. I remained quiet as I signed no. It's a good thing I still know how to do sign language. Well, I had a role in the past where I played a character who had selective mutism.

"Oh, 'kay. My bad," I heard him say.

I placed my hand near my mouth while my thumb was pointing up as I meant to say thank you to him for helping me.

"You're welcome,"

Tumango lang ako at tumalikod na, halos tumakbo na paalis. But then, I stopped when I realized something.

Did he just said, you're welcome?! So, he knew sign language?! God, Rara!

"Miss Rara! Where did you go? Hindi ka dapat tumakbo! 'Di ba hindi ka pwedeng mawala sa paningin ko?" Kalmado ngunit madiin ang bawat salita ni Dawson nang maabutan ako.

I handed him the coffee I got for him. "This coffee is for you... sorry," I uttered apologetically.

Huminga siya nang malalim at tinanggap ang pakete ng kape na napili ko. "Salamat... pero hindi mo pa rin dapat ginawa 'yon. Sasamahan naman kita,"

"Ayaw mo kaya kanina!" I hissed.

"Hindi naman sa ayaw ko," mahinahon na wika niya.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's just pay," sagot ko.

Mas nauna akong makarating sa pila dahil tulak-tulak ni Dawson ang dalawang cart. Iyong isa ay puno na at ang isa naman, malapit ng mapuno pero wala na akong balak dagdagan pa.

Hindi naman masyadong mahaba ang pila kaya nakapagbayad na ako agad. The cashier gave me a second glance but she didn't ask anything.

They put our purchases in individual boxes, depending on where the products belong. Then, the bagger placed all the boxes in two separate pushcarts so we could take them to the parking lot. I pushed the lighter carriage as Dawson pushed the heavier one.

May nadaanan kaming nagtitinda ng mga merienda kaya't huminto kami roon para bumili. I bought the famous Filipino afternoon snacks. I bought fifty pesos of turon saging, fifty pesos of maruya, karioka, banana cue, and camote cue. I also bought sixty pesos worth of ginataang bilo bilo.

"Dawson, samahan mo ako kumain!"

Si Dawson kasi ang nagpasok sa mga kahon ng mga groceries dahil hindi ko naman kaya ang mga 'yon... at hindi ko pa rin inaayos ang mga 'yon dahil inuna ko na ang pagkain.

"Hindi na po, Miss Rara. Busog pa ho ako,"

I exaggeratedly gasped, "Anong hindi? Gutom kana! Samahan mo na ako rito. Hindi ko kayang ubusin ang mga 'to."

"Bakit kasi ang dami mong binili?"

"Dahil akala ko, may kasama akong uubos ng mga ito. Saka itatabi ko rin ang iba para kina Ruru at Popsi,"

"Pero hindi pa ako gutom. Sa labas na lang po ako—"

I glared at him. "Dawson, I told you to sit down and join me!"

His lips parted when my voice changed. Bumungisngis ako nang maupo siya sa harapan ko. Inusog ko sa kaniya ang mga pagkain.

"Eat," I ordered softly.

Humagikgik ako nang kumain nga si Dawson. Nagsimula na rin akong tikman lahat ng mga pagkain. Of course, while we were eating, I took the chance to shoot him a question.

"How old are you?" I started.

"30,"

"Seriously? You are thirty?!" I asked surprisingly.

He nodded, "Oo... b-bakit? Do I look older?"

"No! You look younger! I thought we were the same age, or at least you were three or four years older than me," I said.

I laughed out loud when I noticed his ears reddening. He quickly lowered his head, avoiding my gaze. I smiled widely.

"I won't still call you kuya, though. It sounds weird," I shrugged and continued eating.

"Mas maganda kung gano'n, Miss Rara... dahil amo kita," sambit ni Dawson.

"We can be friends naman," I offered, but of course, he declined.

Natapos kami kumain na mas nakilala ko ang bodyguard ko. Nalaman kong may anim siyang kapatid at puro sila lalaki. Nasa lahi rin nila ang pagiging sundalo at pulis.

Mas nagulat ako nang malaman na may naging asawa na siya noon, limang taon na ang nakalilipas. Ngunit pumanaw na ito dahil sa malubhang sakit. Wala raw silang naging anak at dalawang taon lang sila nagsama sa iisang bubong.

Dawson was a man of few words. Smiling wasn't on his vocabulary, too.

Later that night, Popsi got home from work and asked me if I wanted to accompany him to a small party with his friends. Since I didn't have anything to do, I accepted his invitation.

I wore a pink satin dress with a big ribbon on the front. My hair was in a bun, and a few strands of my wavy hair were loose. Hindi na ako naglagay masyado ng kolorete at ayoko naman makakuha masyado ng pansin.

"This is my daughter. Rashaiah Dorothy," pinakilala ako ni Popsi sa mga kausap niya.

"Your daughter is a beautiful woman," komento ng isang babae bago ngumiti sa akin. "Is she your youngest, general?"

Popsi chuckled, "She is, kamukhang-kamukha ni Reina, 'no?"

"Oo, kahawig na kahawig nga ni Reina. Walang nakuha sa 'yo, Ro," sabi naman ng isang matandang lalaki.

"Gago, mayro'n naman!"

My lips parted when he cursed, "Popsi..." I tugged his sleeves. But he ignored me because someone took his attention.

"Ilan taon kana, hija?" The same guy who teased my father asked.

"I'm turning twenty-four na po,"

"Magkalapit lang pala ang edad niyo ng bunso ko! Iyong bunso kong anak na si Gabriel, bente sais at Architect sa ZDS! Bagay kayo!"

Narinig naman agad 'yon ni Popsi. "Dom, 'tong anak ko, hindi pa pwede magboyfriend. Manliligaw, papayagan ko pero depende sa lalaki at baka mabugbog ko lang kung gago. Tatlo rin ang mga barako ko sa bahay at hindi sila sang-ayon na magkaroon na ng boyfriend 'tong prinsesa ko. May bodyguard din itong anak ko..."

"Gago, Roro! Bantay sarado mo talaga 'tong anak mo. Paano ka magkaka-apo kung bantay sarado mo?"

Pumalatak si Popsi, "May mga barako ako sa bahay. Tatlo 'yon at sigurado naman akong mabibigyan nila ako ng apo. Itong prinsesa ko, baka kahit 40 years-old na, may bantay pa rin."

Napangiwi ako sa narinig.

The older guy shook his head. "Good luck sa future boyfriend mo, nak. Itago mong mabuti sa popsi mo," he whispered to me in a joking way.

I just nodded, "O-opo,"

Nang mapunta sa mga trabaho nila ang topic, nakahinga ako ng maluwag. I excused myself when I felt my social battery getting drained. Pumayag naman si Popsi pero huwag daw ako lalayo at wala si Dawson para bantayan ako.

Naghanap ako ng lugar na tahimik, 'yong ako lang mag-isa. I saw a mini garden, so I sat on the bench. I sighed and stared at my feet.

Mga ilang minuto lang at may dalawang pares ng mga paa ang pumasok sa garden. I took a quick look to see who entered the garden, but it was a wrong move because my eyes met the familiar sunset eyes I was trying to avoid.

"Kuya Dwight!" I called his name in surprise.

Bakit nandito siya?!

Hindi nga ako pumunta sa kanila para hindi siya makita tapos nandito siya?

This man is in his expensive business suit, which makes him look extra handsome. Dwight just looks at me, expectant. He wasn't smiling at all, but he doesn't look pissed or mad either.

God, I love the silent type, but he's intimidating, so no.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

I saw him take a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He opened the cover of the small box and took one stick before he smoothly lit in. Instead of walking away like I always do whenever someone is about to smoke in front of me, I stayed.

"You smoke?" I started.

Dwight's eyes met mine. The stick was perfectly in between his lips as if the cigarette was solely designed for his soft lips.

"What do you think, kid?"

I rolled my eyes upon hearing what he called me.

"Dalaga na ako," I grunt.

Tumingala siya sa langit at dahan-dahang bumuga ng usok ng sigarilyo. I stared at him more. His side profile is absolutely beautiful, and his nose is like a water slide. Dwight looked so expensive while puffing the smoke between his lips.

"Who are you with?" he asked again.

I swallowed to clear out my throat when he caught me watching him.

"I-I'm with someone,"

"Who?" he asked.

"Why are you asking?"

"Does my brother know this?"

I huffed, "Excuse me? Dustin doesn't have to know my whereabouts. This ain't his business," iritado kong sagot.

His face remained serious as he stared at me.

"He should know..." He puffed another smoke of the cigarette. "He's your..."

"He's my best friend," I resumed with what he wanted to say. "I'm also with my dad. He's inside with his friends," I clarified.

"Why didn't you go to our mansion? Are you... " he trailed off, and our eyes met in a dramatic way. "Avoiding me?"

Umawang ang labi ko at nangapa nang sasabihin.

"H-hindi..." I bit my bottom lip. "I-I was busy the whole day. Kasama ko rin si Dawson maghapon,"

His forehead wrinkled as his thick eyebrows furrowed, creating a clash.

"Who's that? Who is Dawson?"

I blinked when I caught the muscles on his jaw harshly moving. Napalunok ako bigla.

"Dawson is my bodyguard," I clarified.

Namangha ako nang makitang unti-unting uminahon ang itsura niya.

"You have a bodyguard?" he asked, calmer this time.

I nodded, "Yup. So, why are you smoking?" I said and ended up asking him, too.

"I only smoke when I'm stressed or thinking about something," he answered as he puffed another smoke.

I'm not too fond of the smell of smoke, but I guess there's an exemption to that.

I laughed at my inward thoughts.

"What makes you stressed?" I asked.

"That..." Bahagyang ngumuso ang labi niya.

"Are you saying I stressed you out?!" I asked, raising my voice.

His lips twitched. Parang gusto niyang ngumisi pero pinipigilan niya lang para hindi ko mahalata.

"Why do you ask a lot?" he shot me a question instead.

"Because I am curious!"

"Why?"

My eyes narrowed in annoyance. "Curious,"

"Why?"

"Paulit-ulit ka naman, kuya 'e!" sabi ko at nag cross arms pa.

Naningkit ang mga mata niya at halos umirap sa'kin. Umawang ang labi ko roon. I bit my bottom lip as I stifled a giggle.

Ang cute niya!

Dwight didn't finish the cigarette. He puffed the fire on the edge and threw the stick into the trash can.

"Are you done?" I said, loosening the awkward air.

I watched his every move. He fished something in his pocket, and a small candy was revealed. He opened the candy and took it inside his mouth.

I was caught off guard when he spun at me and cornered me on the bench. Dahil nakaupo ako sa bench, kailangan ko talagang tumingala sa kaniya.

Nahugot ko ang hininga nang idinikit ang pisngi niya sa gilid ng ulo ko.

"Do you find me interesting?" he whispered huskily.

I shivered because his hot and minty breath scent touched my ear. My lips trembled.

"K-kuya Dwight, you're too close!" I took the courage to push him away.

Nagpatangay naman siya at mabilis na namungay ang mga mata niya habang nakatingin sa akin.

"Don't watch me again when I smoke, do you understand?"

"Why can't I?"

He exhaled a deep and long breath. Hindi niya inalis sa akin ang mga mata.

"You're too..."

"Too?"

"Pretty... distracting," he said, almost murmuring that I didn't hear him say anything.

"What?!"

Napalunok ako nang binasa niya ang labi. Mas namula 'yon at pakiramdaman ko, biglang uminit ang paligid.

"Basta," he ordered.

I tsked, "Fine! Noted po, kuya Dwight!"

Mas lalong naging iritado ang mukha niya.

"Stop that," he hissed.

"Ano po, kuya?"

"That. Don't call me that,"

"Bakit? It's a sign of respect po, kuya Dwight."

"Stop..." he uttered roughly. "Calling me kuya. We aren't blood-related, okay? You are not my sister. Don't call me that," he demanded.

Humaba ang nguso ko, "Ang daming bawal sa 'yo! But fine! Whatever makes you sleep at night, kuya Dwight—" Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang mabanggit ulit 'yon. "I mean, oo na po."

"Rara! Rashaiah!"

My eyes widened when I heard Popsi's voice. I stood up from the bench.

"That was my dad! I have to go!" I was about to run when he spoke.

"Be careful. Your heels are too high, you might slip if you run..."

I blinked when I heard his worried words. But then, I found myself smiling genuinely at him and said,

"Thank you, Dwight..." before walking away.

:)