Playing with the twins in their fur was Lillian's new favorite pastime, during which her wolf was relaxed and in balance with her human side.
The three were playing in the woods. The sun shone bright and strong through the towering firs. Birds sang a cheerful morning tune and a summer breeze ruffled her brown fur. The twins' laughter rang in her head.
"Mommy, look! It's a rabbit!"
"It won't work on me again," Lillian linked Ezra, pulling him by his hind leg, careful to keep her hold gentle. It took her a few tries to know how to carry the twins without hurting them with her sharp canines. But once she let her wolf take the lead, instinct took over and she did it.
After breakfast, she'd shifted and chased the twins from their cabin into the woods. Elijah was trapped under her, only his head poked out, wriggling to get out.
Linking was flawless. When before she had to focus in order to mind-link the twins, now it became as effortless as speaking.
Elijah managed to crawl out and scrambled away. Lillian raised her head and looked at him, a wolfish grin on her wolf's face. She let Ezra go too, and the two pups collided and rolled around, growling and biting.
Their brown fur caught the sun, looking like golden threads. Lillian's wolf rested her head on her paws and relaxed. It had been two days since she came to the pack. She spent the majority of that time in her cabin with the twins, occasionally taking a run outside with them. The isolation cleared her head, she felt more at peace with her new self.
She still pushed her wolf back sometimes, but she was getting better at accepting her instincts and behaviors as hers.
Lillian yawned until her jaw cracked. Shaking her head, she sniffed the air. Noah's scent tickled her nose for a fraction of a second. Maybe she just imagined it, but they were close to his cabin.
He spent the night as his wolf in her bedroom, and for the two days she hadn't seen the man. Now that she could mind-link him, too, it was no longer an issue. He gave her space, for which she was both grateful and annoyed. The need to be around him was gut-wrenching, but her wolf seemed to want to burst out of her skin whenever he was close.
But this was enough isolation for Lillian. The pack understood that she needed time and space and they gave her both, but she already missed them. It was about time to get back to normal life again.
Besides, Elle and Arthur had been in the cabin near the border of the pack since the day of their arrival. Today the Seer would join them. It was time Lillian faced the music.
A chill ran down her spine.
Lillian froze. The fur on her back rose. She sprang to her feet and looked around, then remembered Noah's words. "Use your nose. Treat it as another pair of eyes."
"Boys, come here," she linked the twins. They must have heard the urgency in her voice because they jumped to their feet and ran to her side. Lillian raised her nose to the air and tried making sense of what it was telling her. It was frustrating since all she could smell and see were the woods around them.
A breeze blew right then, carrying with it a scent. Lillian snapped her head that way. She knew that scent, but for the life of her she couldn't remember who it belonged to. Damn her memory. But it was a female, of that much she was certain.
Grass crunching on the other side. She turned her head and watched carefully. Her ears pricked back and a growl shook her chest.
Blake appeared.
Lillian's growl stopped. Blake was in his skin, dressed in a pair of shorts, his brown hair damp. Lillian relaxed a fraction. She felt a tug in her mind and allowed it. Blake's voice filled her head.
"Hey, are you sure you should be out here on your own?" he put his hand in his pocket and leaned against the tree beside him.
"Yeah. It's not that deep into the woods," Lillian said. "We're still inside the patrol perimeter of the pack village."
He was about to say something when the wind blew again. They both turned to the newcomer. Now the scent was strong enough for Lillian to recall its owner.
Phoebe.
She appeared through the trees, tall and graceful. Blake took his hand out of his pocket and straightened. He came to stand beside Lillian and the twins, facing Phoebe. Lillian pushed the pups behind her. They were quiet, unusually so. They must have felt tension in the air.
Lillian didn't like that she was alone with two transfer wolves. Blake she trusted, to an extent. But Phoebe? She had made her animosity to Lillian known. She was hostile to Lillian in front of the pack. But out here, alone, in the woods? Phoebe could very well decide to do something stupid.
"Phoebe, what are you doing here?" Blake said.
"Stay out of this, Blake," Phoebe said. Blake's stance wasn't lost on Lillian. He would take her side if things went awry. Which reminded Lillian.
"Noah, I'm out here in the woods with the twins, Blake and Phoebe, close to your cabin," she linked Noah. She didn't want to take unnecessary risks. She had no intention of making her pups orphans. Noah's reply came right away.
"I'm coming."
"No," Lillian said firmly. "I'm fine right now. If there's something wrong I'll let you know."
He growled through the link, and Lillian could almost feel a hint of frustration echo in her chest. Hmm.
"I'm here to talk to the human," Phoebe said, jerking her head toward Lillian. She must think being referred to as a human would annoy Lillian. Silly woman.
Lillian pushed until she found her mind. "I'm all ears."
Surprise flickered in her hazel eyes. She pushed her hair back and put a hand on her hip. "Good. This makes things easier. I want you to step away from Noah."
Lillian looked around her. "And I want to have wings," Lillian replied. "But life doesn't work like that, princess."
Phoebe snarled and took a step forward. Blake growled, stopping her in her tracks. "You have no idea what it takes to be an Alpha!" Phoebe's shrill voice said in her head.
Lillian didn't want to be an alpha. It was simply a side-effect of being Noah's mate in her book. "And you do?" she asked Phoebe.
The other female raised her head and looked down her nose at Lillian. "Yes, I do. I'm the daughter of an Alpha."
Ah. So she was a princess.
Lillian sighed. "Look, Phoebe?.I understand you don't like me. That's fine. I don't like you either. But I don't go out of my way chasing you around and trying to drive you out of the pack. So let's just draw some lines so we can both live in peace. Stay out of my life, and that includes Noah."
Phoebe twisted her lips in a condescending smile. "Or what? As if you could do anything. You can't even defend yourself, you have to rely on Blake here." She waved her hand Blake's way. "Don't lecture me about lines when you can't even uphold your own rank in the pack. The entire pack knows it and feels it, but they're giving you time because you're the poor little human who was lucky enough to mother two pups and to land herself an alpha mate. You're weak."
Ugh. She was right, and it irritated Lillian. The fact was, if Blake wasn't here and Phoebe decided to wipe the ground with her, Lillian wouldn't have been able to do a damn thing about it. At least in her human form. She still didn't test her wolf's fighting instincts, and she had no desire to do it anytime soon. She had a feeling that if she let her wolf loose on someone, she would lose control over her. Lillian didn't want to kill anyone.
Lillian's wolf dug her claws in the ground, frustrated and angry. For the first time, Lillian shared those stormy feelings and embraced them as her own.
Phoebe was a thorn in her side, and Noah was barely holding himself back from shredding her to pieces because he knew Lillian wouldn't want him to fight her battles for her, whether that was Phoebe or someone else.
That meant Lillian needed to start fighting those battles herself.
"So when I prove my rank, will you stop with this nonsense?" Lillian asked.
Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Sure. Not that you can."
Lillian's temper flared. It took everything she had to keep her wolf back. Her entire body trembled with the effort. "Great, then," she linked her, her voice sharp. "You and me, two weeks from now, in the training ring. How does that sound?"
Phoebe raised her brow, looking Lillian's wolf up and down without meeting her eyes. "Right. And risk getting on Noah's bad side? I don't think so."
"You have my word Noah won't interfere."
A slow smile took over Phoebe's face. "Deal. Two weeks from now. I'll get to humiliate you in front of the entire pack."
Lillian growled, her wolf taking a step forward.
But Phoebe was right. Damn her, she was right. Lillian might have the body of a werewolf with all the perks that came with it, but in a fight with Phoebe, she would lose.
She needed to learn how to use this new body, and quickly. It wasn't just because of Phoebe. There were many things happening in her life at the moment, many things that would require her to be alert and strong.
It was about time Lillian got herself together and started being the woman that she was instead of acting like a lost puppy.
*** **** ***
Lillian brewed on her encounter with Phoebe for the rest of her day.
After getting back home, she found Anna sitting on the steps of her porch. She stood up, waddling, when Lillian and the twins approached.
Lillian's wolf sniffed Anna's belly, a gentleness to her movements. Anna chuckled and rubbed between her ears. "Come on, I need you today. I have a lesson with Violet."
Ears pricked at the thought of the little wolf, Lillian rushed inside, opening the door with her teeth. The pups kept Anna company until Lillian shifted and dressed in a t-shirt and a pair of basketball shorts. Now she understood Noah's obsession with the shorts. They were easy to shed off if one wanted to shift.
The twins were off to play with the other pups. They must have missed them, seeing as they stayed home with her for two full days, even skipping their lessons.
Anna and Lillian strolled to the school. Lillian took deep breaths, her nose picking up nuances and subtle scents she still didn't fully understand.
"I had a little encounter with Phoebe," she told the witch.
Anna's eyes widened, she put her hand on Lillian's forearm and squeezed. "Ooooh, juicy gossip. Tell me everything."
Lillian snorted. "You're terrible. But nothing really happened. It's the expected nonsense of staying away from Noah."
"Huh. I'd like to hear her say that in front of Noah."
"She wouldn't," Lillian said and narrowed her eyes at her friend. "And you won't tell him, either."
Anna blinked her black lashes and widened her eyes. "You'll take away a pregnant woman's fun."
"Yes, I will. I'm serious, Anna."
"Fine, fine," she grumbled. "Is that why you look different? Or is it just the isolation?"
Lillian stopped. They were in the middle of the village. Pack mates were going about their business, the smell of lunch in the pack house already reached Lillian's nose. It was close to lunchtime. Lillian waved to Liv and Elias' mother who were coming back from the school's direction.
"Different how?" she asked Anna.
"More... focused, I guess," Anna shrugged. "It's a witch thing. We have a good sense for magic. And your wolf felt kind of lost and subdued since you came."
Lillian wondered if her promise to Phoebe had anything to do with it. Having something that both she and her wolf would work together to achieve made her more balanced. But she'd felt better before her encounter with Phoebe. Accepting her wolf felt natural. Pushing her back was what felt abnormal.
"Yeah, I don't know," Lillian said. "It might have something to do with my future fight with Phoebe."
"What fight?!"
She told Anna about her argument with Phoebe. Anna groaned. "Lillian, you don't need to prove yourself to her of all people."
Lillian crossed her arms. "You know she's right, Anna. I can't be dominant and weak. You know that it messes with my balance and the pack's balance. If not Phoebe, then someone else will come by."
Anna sighed. "I still think you could've handled the situation better."
"Okay, maybe you're right. I was a little reckless. But it's done and over with. I'm not going back on my word."
"Then you better tell Kate," Anna said pointedly, "and Noah."
"I will." She scoffed. "Also, I wouldn't call my wolf subdued."
"Okay, maybe I should've said, you subdued her," Anna said. "It's like you're pushing her back too much. Right now, it's the most balanced I've seen you."
Lillian frowned to herself. "You're not the first one to tell me I push my wolf back too much," she grumbled.
"You should be careful, you know," Anna asked.
"It's the only way I know how to control her."
"Well, I'm not a wolf, but if you push her back too much, she'll snap. Pressure her too much and she might explode." Anna shrugged. "But like I said, I'm not a wolf, so you should talk to someone who is about it."
"Yeah..." Lillian looked at Anna. She narrowed her eyes at the other woman, who'd been looking her in the eyes without her wolf reacting in any way. "Hey, how come my wolf doesn't snap when you're looking me in the eyes?"
Anna grinned and patted her belly. "Because of my vulnerable state. I'm pregnant."
Lillian grinned back and linked her arm through Anna's. "Great. You should stay pregnant longer."
Anna almost chewed Lillian's head off at that. She was more than ready to give birth.
Violet was lurking by the school cabin. Pups ran by and around her, and she stood frozen, wide-eyed, watching them exert their endless energy.
Dressed in a set of blue sweats, Violet no longer looked like a starved waif. She'd put on weight and her skin had a healthy flush of color. Even her hair gleamed under the sun.
This was Violet's first session with Anna. Violet looked up when they drew closer, she immediately looked away from Lillian's gaze. Lillian's heart broke a little. Lillian swallowed thickly, but kept a smile on her face. It was okay. She'd get used to it.
They followed Anna inside to her classroom. A touch on Lillian's hand. She looked down to see Violet's fingers closing around her hand. She looked at Violet, and the younger wolf leaned her head on Lillian's shoulder and squeezed her hand tighter.
How could she break her heart and heal it at the very same minute? Lillian's smile turned genuine, feeling hopeful for a change. Maybe Jake was right, she needed to stop thinking like a human. And maybe Jennifer was right; everything would fall into place.
Violet couldn't read or write, so Anna started with that. The young girl's mind was agile, and she learned quickly enough. Lillian stayed at the back of the classroom, reading a book while Anna worked with Violet. Violet didn't seem to mind Anna, so they probably wouldn't need Lillian's presence in future sessions.
Lillian went with Violet to the pack house after her lesson. The twins joined them, in their skin and dressed in shorts that smelled like Elias. She must thank the pup's mother later.
"Mommy! Will Elle and Arthur come to the village again?" Ezra asked.
Lillian sighed, remembering the visit she'd been putting off. "I don't know, sweetheart. You'll have to ask Noah that."
"There he is!" Elijah said and ran forward. Noah was speaking with Jake near the pack house. He glanced their way, and a zing of electricity zipped down to Lillian's toes.
An echo of heat pooled down her belly. Noah crouched down and picked up Elijah, then Ezra who joined them, the muscles of his upper body rolling with the movement.
Lillian groaned. She really missed him, and it was getting difficult to hold back.
Lillian paused. Why was she holding back?
She frowned. A blank was her only answer. Violet touched her hand, her head cocked in a silent question. Lillian smiled and resumed their walk to the pack house.
By the time Noah and the twins joined them, Violet and Lillian were sitting with their lunch trays at one of the bench tables on the very edge of the outdoor dining area.
"Mommy, we got two chocolate puddings!" Elijah said, sitting next to Noah while Ezra took the other side.
"How lucky," Lillian said.
Now that she was a wolf herself, she understood the twins' endless appetite and the way they burned through energy. She felt guilty about all the times she'd stopped them from having too much sugar, because she had been judging their diet as a human, not understanding how fast they could burn through it all.
Being a werewolf herself, she came to realize, was making her a better mother.
Noah cut off pieces of the pile of meat on his plate and put the best bits on the twins', Violet's and her plate. Lillian watched his movements with a new fascination, her wolf looking through her eyes at her mate.
The earlier question echoed in her head. Why was she holding back with Noah? He knew everything there was to know about her, her darkest secrets and greatest fears.
Was it just a force of habit, of not letting anyone else truly in? Or did it have something to do with her past? Was she afraid of intimacy?
No. No, she wasn't. She had been lucky, in a way, to not remember what happened that night. Or was she? She didn't know, but she definitely knew that it did not affect her desire for this man.
"Stop looking at me like that," he linked her, his voice a deep growl in her mind. He wasn't even looking at her.
Lillian smiled and took a forkful of potatoes. "Like what?"
"Like you want to eat me."
Lillian almost choked on her food. Violet patted her back, looking worried. "I'm okay," Lillian smiled, clearing her throat.
She squinted at Noah and bit back a smile. "Maybe I do."
It was his turn to choke. Sweet payback.
A familiar smell. Lillian looked around to find Kate, holding a tray of her own, her two kids skipping behind her. Lillian waved the warrior over. The children immediately started their own line of conversation.
"I heard you met with Phoebe," Kate said as soon as she sat down next to Lillian. Lillian glanced at Noah. He kept eating, his knife and fork working to cut through the meat in precise portions. He had not asked her about it. It must have cost him a great deal of effort to hold back.
"News travels fast," Lillian mumbled. "Well, since I'm going to need your help anyway, you might as well know. I might or might not have challenged her into a fight."
Crack.
Lillian, Kate and Violet looked at Noah. His hands froze, still holding the knife and the fork, his plate split in half.
Kate's eyes widened. Lillian smothered back a laugh. "Did you just cut through your plate?"
Noah sighed and put away his cutlery. "What do you mean, a fight?"
"A fight." Lillian ate some meat to give herself time to find a way to say it so that it wouldn't seem like she'd made a reckless decision in a moment of anger. Nothing came to mind. She sighed. "I was angry and I acted like a hot-headed teenager. Bottom line is, Phoebe and I will have a fight two weeks from now."
Noah rubbed a hand down his face. Lillian felt sorry for him. He must be under a lot of stress. Some of it because of her. "I'm sorry," she mumbled in the mind-link.
He frowned. "What for?"
"Well, for putting you through all this, the shift and everything."
"Lillian, don't ever apologize for being in my life," he said. "I would take hell knowing you're with me than a peaceful existence otherwise."
Lillian wanted to jump over the table and hug him.
Kate grinned. "Well, I guess that means you'll get up and personal with the dirt for the upcoming two weeks."
Noah slowly nodded. "Technically, a challenge within the pack must be authorized by the alpha."
"I'm not going back on my word," Lillian said.
"I know, which is why you'll have to endure Kate's hellish training." Noah sighed heavily. "It's not going to be easy."
"I know." But she'd survived a lot more, she could do this. Lillian gave a firm nod. Yes, she could.
*** **** ***
She was looking at him. Again.
Noah didn't mind It. He was hers to look at. But there was something heavy in her gaze, in a good way.
They walked through the forest towards Arthur and Elle's cabin. Elle and Charles had been here since the day Noah and Lillian came back, but Arthur only came this morning, accompanied by the Seer and Irene, one of his people, and Charles left.
"If you don't watch your footing, you'll trip," Noah said.
Lillian swung her head away, her hair flicking over her cheek. He glanced at her and smiled. Her face was red under the trellis of sunlight sifting through the trees. He felt a prick of her embarrassment.
"If you don't catch me, do you even call yourself my mate?" She shot back.
Noah chuckled. "Point."
She grinned, jumping over a fallen tree with an agility that betrayed fast developing muscles. Her body was changing in subtle ways, strengthening and adjusting to quicker reflexes and sharper senses. With enough training, she would become a very strong werewolf.
Noah was again hit by an immense sense of gratitude and relief. After all she'd been through, she was finally immortal. He didn't have to worry about sickness, a wrong fall or a deep wound killing her.
"Why does it feel like..." she said, frowning. "Like I can feel..."
"My emotions? Probably because you can."
Her eyes widened and she stopped. "So I wasn't imagining it."
"No. But the bond is still nascent. Perks of it will make themselves known as it gains strength," he said. "Once the bond is fully made-"
"Fully made as in...?" she glanced his way. He winked.
She pinched her lips to the side, but a smile peeked through nonetheless. "Maybe we should get to working on that."
Noah froze mid-step. Lillian winked and went ahead of him.
He drew a deep breath and closed his eyes. This was neither the time nor the place for such thoughts. He caught up to her and gave her a look. "You're horrible."
She chuckled and bumped him with her shoulder. "I'll take it as a compliment."
The sound of swords fighting rang in the air. Lillian frowned. "What's that?"
"What do you smell?"
Lillian took several deep breaths and her frown cleared up. "There are patrols nearby, I smell Johnson and Brenda. Oh, Elle. Elle and Arthur and... other people? Two?"
"Good. Elle and Arthur are probably sparring," he said. "And the two others are Irene and the Seer."
The sound of fighting got louder, and as they got closer and trees got sparser, the view cleared up. Lillian's steps slowed down as the most dangerous couple in the world came into sight.
Elle and Arthur were indeed sparring, their swords glinting.
"Wow," Lillian breathed out, stopping. Noah understood her fascination. Elle and Arthur were both great fighters. But when they held swords, they transformed.
Arthur was a graceful dragon, tall and long-limbed, his body flowed like it was boneless, as if gravity did not exist in his world. Elle was a light-footed dancer, small and fast and unexpectedly strong. The two moved in unison, it was plain for anyone looking that the two people knew each other's rhythms by heart. They understood how the other moved, how they'd react and how fast.
Lillian leaned forward, her eyes tracking the movements of the two with an attentive, predatory gaze, the blue irises shifting to amber for a quick second. Elle had gotten faster since the last time Noah saw her fight.
Arthur and Elle clashed swords. Elle swung her leg, Arthur sprang back and landed several feet behind, lowering his sword to his side.
"What?!" Elle snarled, swinging her sword wildly around.
"We have guests," Arthur said, his lips twitching up.
Elle snapped her head around, her glare fiery and a flame of blue igniting in her green iris.
Elle's glare melted into a grin when she spotted them, she grinned. "Lillian! How is my new favorite wolf?"
Lillian chuckled and moved forward, meeting Elle halfway. She surprised the fae by giving her a hug. "Thank you for coming," Lillian said.
"You're welcome," Elle said. The sheath of her sword floated from near the cabin towards her. She sheathed her sword and held it. Stabbing a thumb over her shoulder at Arthur, she said, "He has his uses."
Noah joined them in time to see Lillian's smile.
"Where are the others?" Noah asked.
"Right here," Arthur said a second before two women walked out of the cabin.
The first one was a shapeshifter. A brunette with pale skin, dark eyes and a darker hair, her features hinting at east Asian origins. Irene.
"What is she?" Lillian wrinkled her nose, taking in Irene's scent. "Some type of shapeshifter, right? But there's something weird..."
"She's a nine-tailed fox," Noah said, remembering the white fox who'd fought beside him and Elle six months ago.
Lillian glanced at him, wide-eyed. "I thought they didn't exist. I read about them in one of Anna's books."
"I didn't think they still exist, either," Noah said. "But here she is."
Trailing behind Irene was a vampire. Pale skinned, bird-boned and with irises so pale they almost blended with the whites of her eyes. The Seer.
She followed Irene, her movements almost robotic and her eyes blank. Once Irene stopped, the Seer also stopped, standing slightly behind her. She was wearing a pale green sweater several shades darker than her eyes and jeans. The skin of her hands and her neck was covered with countless scars, raised lines on her skin that stopped in her jaws. Noah had seen her before and knew that the scars littered her entire body up to her jawline.
"Lillian, this is Irene," Elle said, "and the Seer."
"Hey," Lillian smiled at Irene, glancing at the Seer.
"Congratulations?" Irene said. "I don't know what people usually say in these situations."
Lillian laughed. "I don't either. I'll take the congratulations, thank you."
Elle looked at the Seer, then shook her head at Noah, her lips set in a grim line.
Noah sighed. He'd hoped the Seer would be lucid enough to give them some clues. They weren't that lucky.
"I was just going on a walk with her," Irene said, putting her arm around the Seer's shoulders.
"I can show you around," Lillian said. "There's a nice creek nearby."
Before Noah could pipe in, Sean's voice filled his head.
"Harvey called. I think you should talk to him," he said.
"Why? What did he say?"
"He found him. He found Albert's son."
Noah's eyes snapped to Lillian. They found the bastard.
--- ---- ---
Hello my dear friends!
I hope you're doing well! How did you like the chapter?
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M.B.
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