Chapter 25 - Summers

It’s been perfect. I have no other way to describe what these few days with Louis have been. Our first date as a couple was more than I could’ve ever expected. He did only nice things for me and the musical was amazing, I loved it and I know he enjoyed it, too, which made me so happy. I don’t like feeling that I’m forcing someone to watch a musical. I like that he also enjoys the things I love. This makes me feel like we can bond even more.

Besides all that, it’s just been perfect. Even if we only see each other for fifteen minutes in the day, it’s lovely. He’s so caring and sweet to me, always making sure I’m having a good time, but he’s not overbearing. I’ve never felt like that, like I’m actually important to someone, really important. He’s probably the sweetest guy I’ve ever known and even his kisses are always sweet.

Did I mention how good of a kisser Louis Tomlinson is? No? My bad, I’m sorry.

He is incredible. Sometimes he makes my head spin and the world disappear with just one kiss; others he kisses me like I’m the most precious creature in existence and he’s afraid he might break me, and others it’s just like he can’t get enough of me.

Needless to say I’ve never felt like this before with someone. And it’s because he’s so great, he treats me so well and because he makes me feel like the most beautiful woman every day is that I’m the most scared I’ve ever felt. I’m lucky he likes me, really, because he’s one of those guys you only find in books. I swear, it seems like some writer made him up and he came to life and to me. He’s not just a good guy, he’s a gentleman. The day I meet his mother I’m going to hug her and thank her in name of all human kind for raising the best man alive. If my dad were alive, they would share that title.

Louis has his flaws, too. He’s not that patient and he gets frustrated easily. I noticed that when we were playing Xbox one day and he also hates losing, but probably that fired spirit makes him so immersed in the game. Also, he’s quite obsessive. He’s working really hard on enhancing his endurance so he can resist a whole  ninety-minute game. He trains so hard that I’m afraid he’s wearing himself out. He’s not getting enough sleep, I’m sure. He wakes up really early to train and still stays for another hour on the field after the practice is over. I can’t always stay to make him company, which only makes me worry more because if I have so much to do for Uni, so should he. So when does he find time to study?

I haven’t voiced my worries to him yet because I’m just observing, gathering evidence but I think I’ll soon ask him to take it easy. He needs to balance everything, he can’t jeopardise his major because of football. I know it’s important, but so is his major.

But even if he has those flaws and maybe many more, he’s still a good person, a good man and that’s priceless. I don’t care about his flaws because they are not that terrible and  they make him the person he is and that person is making me fall so fast and so hard. I know I have a tendency to fall in love quite easily, but with Louis it’s even easier.

Sometimes when I see him on the field I wonder how is it that I never noticed him before. Even if he wasn’t this good before how is that I didn’t notice his energy? His passion? But at the same time I like that he didn’t catch my eye for the player he’s on the field, but for the man he is in his life. He helped me in a complicated situation and always respected my space and that I needed time. He never pushed me and that’s something that tells you a lot about his character.

And it’s because of all those things that I’m so scared. Scared that someone else will take him away from me. I’m afraid I won’t be able to keep him by my side. I’m afraid that he’ll get tired of me and push me away like Ryan did.

Since Louis and I started dating and I realised how lucky I am for having him, I’ve been thinking of Ryan, one of my ex boyfriends, more often. Not because I still care about him or anything. In fact, it’s not thinking about him but thinking of how it ended between us. Sometimes I see the way he broke up with me so clearly in my mind that it  frightens me.

Ryan was a good guy, too. Sweet but in a different way, not like Louis. He treated me well and we used to go out a lot. He liked partying maybe too much. I don’t blame him, we dated during our last year in college, and partying was all the kids our age were doing.

One of Ryan’s flaws was that he was too friendly and flirty. I know many girls had a crush on him and some of  them didn’t even mind that he was dating someone else. I saw red every time that happened, how they could be so shameless around him and it pissed me even more that Ryan didn’t do anything about it.

“You’re exaggerating, Robin. They are just friends!” he used to say, making me so mad at him for not realising what his behaviour was doing to me.

“They don’t see you as a friend! And you encourage them,” I fought back every time.

“Can’t you trust me?!” he would always ask me and my answer was always the same.

“I trust you, but they are the problem and I just want you to help by not encouraging them!”

“So you want me to not have friends because you’re too insecure?” he would retort and I remember groaning every time in frustration.

“You don’t understand. You never understand!” I yelled and usually by that time I would just leave because arguing with Ryan was always so hard and it would make me feel miserable by the end of the day.

I’m not exaggerating, those girls were terrible. I even heard them once saying that I wasn’t good enough for Ryan and he should be with one of them. They really wanted to steal him from me. At the end it worked. I remember that day so clearly.

“It’s not working anymore, Robin,” Ryan said that day, one week before the A-level exams. He couldn’t have picked a worse timing.

“What do you mean?” I asked dazed although I kind of saw it coming, I thought we would wait until we were done with our exams. He didn’t.

“Us. It’s not working anymore, I can’t do this. You are a great girl, but this is not the same. We fight all the time—”

“But we can try harder and fix it.” I cut him off, desperate to stop what he was going to say. “I’m sure that if—”

“No,” he interrupted me then. “We can’t fix it. It’s broken already and it’s best for both of us if we end it here. Don’t make it harder, Robin,” he added when he saw I was about to say something else. “Goodbye,” finished Ryan leaning in to give me one last kiss on my forehead.

I felt so powerless and so broken because I couldn’t do anything to stop it, to make it work. He was a good guy and I let him go. And it was so much worse because three days later I saw him with that girl I heard talking in the toilets. It was like stabbing me in the middle of my heart with a rusty knife and he knew it. At least he had the decency to look sorry when I saw them, not like that other girl. I still hate her today.

So I’m afraid something like that will happen now. Louis and I have been together for over a week and we haven’t had a single argument, which is a good omen but I’m still scared. I don’t want the story to repeat itself, I don’t want to lose Louis to another girl. I’m terrified because with every day we spend together, the more I fall for him.

I just hope this time I’ll be able to do something about it, to make it work.

+ + + + +

“Are you excited?” I ask Louis after practice.

The team has a game tomorrow, reason why Coach Meyer forced Louis to finish practice like everyone else and to have a good rest tonight. I waited for him and we’re heading to his room now to spend some time together.

“Yes, although I’m a bit concerned about Connor,” he replies and at his concern I squeeze his hand gently, lacing our fingers together and leaning a bit closer to him.

“If he’s  idiotic enough to do something to you I’m sure Coach will kick him out of the team. He lacks intelligence, but not even Connor is that stupid,” I say in a light tone, hoping he would laugh.

Louis only smiles and I know he’s really concerned. We all know Connor is a caveman and he’s beyond pissed that Coach Meyer decided that he would only play half time and Louis would play the other. The coach realised Tom and Louis make a great pair on the field, they enhance each other and they are unstoppable. We all saw that in the previous game. The problem is that Connor is an outstanding player, but he’s always on his own. Coach can’t just leave Connor on the bench during the game. And he tried to make Louis and Connor play side by side as forward. It didn’t work. It went awful and Louis almost ended hurt again.

“It’s gonna be all right, Lou,” I tell him stopping so he does the same. I make him turn around so he can look me in the eyes when I carry on. “Connor won’t hurt you in any way. He’ll have to accept that if he wants to win, he needs to listen to the coach and if he doesn’t like it, he can leave. You just do your best tomorrow and everything will be fine.”

I know Louis is not scared of Connor, just concerned with what that idiot might do to get revenge because it’s obvious he is losing the spotlight to Louis.

Louis smiles wider at me, a bit of his worry fading away as he lets go of my hand and cups my face ever so softly before he leans in to kiss me sweetly. As usual, I melt against him.

“You’re right,” he whispers against my lips. “It’ll be okay and we’re gonna win tomorrow.”

“Of course we’ll win! And I’ll be there cheering for you. I even have a surprise for you,” I tell him with a cheeky smile and he raises his eyebrows at me in a questioning look. “Tsk, tsk, tsk. You’ll see tomorrow. Don’t even ask me to tell you now.”

“Oh, what a tease!” he complains and I just laugh at him, pulling away to grab his hand and start walking again.

“I’m a terrible human, I know,” I joke lightly and I hear him chuckle.

“The worst,” he jokes along, pulling me to wrap his arm around my waist. I automatically wrap mine around his and we keep walking like that. “And I still fancy you like that,” adds Louis kissing my temple.

I don’t say anything else, we just keep walking in a much lighter mood. We spend the rest of the afternoon together and I even help him with one of his courses. He has to write an essay due next week, so I edit it for him, pointing some mistakes so he can learn for his next assignment.

We just do normal things, but I enjoy every second of our time together. I repeat, I can only describe it as perfect. I know every relationship has a honeymoon stage, but without a doubt with Louis has been the sweetest. I wish it would never end.

-:-:-

Oh don't worry, the fluff will end soon and the drama will come and I'll break my characters. Yay!

Dedication to @MixedDreamz. you're right, this is their cute time and soon it'll be over. Soon.

Bel, xx

NU: Monday