The world is changing.

I can feel it in the earth, in the water, and sometimes I smell it in the air.

Wait a moment...

That isn't change I'm smelling, it's smoke.

I lift my head and sniff the air and sure enough, I can smell smoke. I toss the apple I planned on "borrowing" from this vacant fruit stand and debate on whether or not I should investigate. I came to this small village for one purpose and one purpose only: to "borrow" some apples without permission.

I was not about to get myself involved with a bunch of villagers. Surely there have been situations like this before, and they most definitely have solved those situations before without my assistance. I pocket a few more apples and begin walking in the opposite direction of where the smoke is coming from, ignoring the frantic shouts of men as they try to put out the fire.

Don't turn around, don't turn around.

Somebody starts screaming.

Still not going to turn around...

Someone's calling for help. 

I'm still not going to do it...

I hear a woman begging for someone to find her son.

I'm turning around...

And I see fire, a lot of fire.

Quickening my pace and remembering to keep in the shadows, my eyes quickly scan the burning building. It's an inn, a very big inn, and fortunately for the villagers, it's far from any other buildings so at least the fire won't spread.

How a fire started is the least of my concerns at the moment (it's an inn, people drink, get drunk, things like this happen) the woman who caused me to turn around is going about frantically trying to get someone to go inside and search for her son.

I don't have time to ponder over how her son got left alone in a burning inn (they were probably passing through this village and decided to stay at the inn and the fire must have started when the mother wasn't with her son) I pull a black scarf over my mouth and nose, wrap my cloak around my body, and race into the building.

Instantly I feel burning heat on my skin, Pallando had better be right about this cloak being resistant to fire. I reach a gloved hand up and make sure that my hair is safely tucked inside of my hood. Burning hair is not something I want while searching for a child. 

My eyes search through the fire and smoke, I can see burning tables and chairs, but there's no sign of a human boy. Groaning, I make my way towards the stairs, avoiding flames as I go. I test the first step to see if it will hold: if I wasn't an elf it would collapse instantly. Fortunately (though sometimes unfortunately) I am an elf.

I lightly bound up the stairs, ignoring the ominous groans of the burning beams above my head. Find the boy, get out, don't die.

Simple.

Once I reach the top of the stairs I'm straining to hear anything that will lead me to the child, and I'm rewarded immediately with frightened screams. Rewarded, or cursed?

I race down the burning hall as quickly as I can, following the screams. My eyes are beginning to water and my lungs are filling up with smoke, I try not to cough though, if I start coughing now I won't be able to stop.

The screams keep getting louder until finally, I find the room where they are emanating from. The door is closed and on fire (big surprise considering that I'm in a burning building) I don't hesitate to kick it down. I've always wanted to do that actually, even though my foot now hurts and my boots are singed, I'm happy that I finally got to do it.

Finding the boy isn't hard, he's still wailing as he clings to a blanket that he's wrapped around himself, he's also sitting in the middle of the floor. Why don't children who are left in burning buildings actually try and find a way out? Do they just assume that some masked stranger is going to come save them?

I approach the child and they scoot backwards; terrified. Is he really afraid of me? Well, I guess a hooded and masked being dressed in black suddenly appearing out the flames like Death itself would be a bit alarming. However, I don't have time to calm the boy. After all, we're both about to be crushed by burning wood.

Without hesitating, I bend down and scoop the boy into my arms, and the screaming begins. Instead of acknowledging the fact that I'm trying to help him the boy screams and thrashes in my arms, trying to free himself from my arms. As I'm running back down the hall towards freedom, the boy yelling in my ears and beating me with his little fists, I suddenly recall why I avoid children at all cost.

I barely make it to the stairs when the wooden beams supporting the roof finally give way, I have seconds before we're both buried alive. I do not want to die holding a screaming child. Grasping the boy tighter, I fly down the stairs as the roof begins to fall down around me. I run this way and that, dodging falling, burning pieces of wood and other such debris littering the inn floor. The door is in sight but there's one problem...

A long, burning, wooden beam is blocking my way out.

I'd curse but there is a child present.

Without stopping my mad run, I swiftly come to a decision: I'd rather take my chances with a single flaming beam than an entire burning roof coming down on me. 

Holding the boy with one arm I use my left hand to wrap my cloak around his small body, covering him completely with the dark blue cloak.

Pallando had better be right about this cloak...

Gritting my teeth and immediately regretting my decision, I leap in the air, tuck myself into a ball, and crash through the beam.

First I feel pain, intense burning, bone crushing pain all throughout my body.

The second thing I feel is dizziness, I'm rolling head over heels across the ground.

The third thing I feel is solid ground beneath my back, then I watch as the sky starts to spin.

Stars, lots of spinning stars...

I'm hardly aware of the boy sitting up on my chest and calling for his mother, who is now running towards us. The boy climbs off of me and runs with outstretched arms to where his mother waits, both embrace while I roll onto my knees resisting the urge to empty my stomach of its last meal.

"You saved my son," the mother says slowly, almost as if she is in awe. "Who are you?"

I look up, not intending to give her an answer when suddenly my blood runs cold.

No...

No, it can't be...

She's dead...

Standing in front of me, her form silhouetted by the flames is Elwin. 

My wife whom I saw be impaled by a spear while our home burned around us, and in her arms she holds Rilien, our son, whose throat was slit when he was barely a year old.

I fall onto my back, my eyes wide in terror.

"Caran? What's wrong?" Her voice...

It doesn't sound like hers at all, it sounds broken and distorted, and Caran... 

My old name...

"Caran?"

I bite my tongue to keep from screaming.

Elwin is standing there, staring at me through empty eyes as blood soaks her stomach, seeping through her dress and spilling on the ground.

And Rilien...

His neck is covered in blood...

"Caran!"

She screams-no shrieks-my name. She lunges forward with Rilien's limp body in her arms.

"Why didn't you save us Caran?! WHY DID YOU LET US DIE?!

I scramble backwards onto my feet, tears fill my eyes as I watch Elwin's empty eyes flood with hatred, towards me.

"I-I didn't want y-you to die..." I trip and almost fall onto the ground. 

"MY SON IS DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU! AND ANNA?! SHE'S DEAD BECAUSE YOU FAILED HER! YOU COULDN'T KEEP HER SAFE!"

Anna...

Sweet Anna...

I failed her...

I failed them all...

A crowd has gathered, all of them giving me hostile looks but I pay them no heed. I blink once and the vision of Elwin fades. Standing in her place is the woman holding her son, unlike the others concern has entered her gaze.

"Are you alright?" She asks but I never answer.

I turn around and bolt from the village, shoving people aside and racing for the safety of the dark. Once I'm far from the village, and I'm certain that no one is near, I collapse. 

The tears I've been holding back fall from my eyes and roll off my face, landing on the soft earth below. My forehead is pressed against the ground and I'm on my knees. My hood his off and I twist my fingers in my hair, my body shakes as I fight to calm myself.

"It wasn't real, it wasn't real," I mumble over and over again, my voice is so weak I barely recognize it.

"It wasn't real, it wasn't real, they were not there, it wasn't real." My heart is beating so fast it hurts, oh Valar it hurts.

"They are dead. Elwin, Rilien, and Anna are dead..." I have to tell myself this, I have to remind myself that it's true.

"Elwin, Rilien, a-and An-Anna a-are..."

Anna's face flashes in my mind. My beautiful sister, her long, red hair framing her smooth face, bright, green eyes looking back at me, my sweet, loving sister. The last light I had before my world plunged into darkness.

"A-Anna i-is..."

Of all the deaths, her's is still the hardest for me to accept.

"Anna is..."

Because I never saw her die.

Silence fills the air. 

My cries stop, my beating heart is silenced.

I hear nothing except for one thought that echoes in my mind.

You never saw Anna die.

I didn't, I didn't see her die.

I remember her being hurt, and that I couldn't help her. It had been my fault, I was the one who brought those men to her, then they had beaten her before my eyes.

I remember cradling her in my arms, carrying her somewhere safe, a place where I knew she'd be protected from the evil in the world. I left her in that forest where the strange elves lived, I left her lying beneath a tree, then I watched as she was carried away from me.

I haven't seen her since.

I straighten myself but remain on my knees. I wipe the tears from my wet face and rub the dirt off my forehead.

I know that it is highly unlikely that my sister is alive, but I can't help but wonder, what if she is?

If so then is she still here in Middle Earth, or has she sailed with all the other elves to Valinor?

I doubt that she is here, all the elves sailed over the sea decades ago. Any elves who are left are few and far from here.

I have no family left, they're either dead or in Valinor. I have no friends, the only ones I could call friends are dead or in Valinor. Well, except for Pallando, the odd wizard who lives three days west of here. 

Speaking of Pallando, I think it's time that I paid my old friend (literally old) a visit. I have some questions that need answering, and some complaints to lodge. 

Also...

I need him to do something about these visions I'm having of deceased family members. I'm not sure when they started, or why I'm seeing them, but I can't take it anymore. If Pallando can do something about my visions maybe I'd be able to find some peace.

Maybe...

Straightening myself, I cover my head with my hood again, then checking to make sure I'm not being followed, I head west. 

/\\//\\//\

Three days later I find myself standing before the blue, wooden door that leads into Pallando's house. I knock once on the soft wood before pushing the door open.

"I'm back," I announce stooping to avoid banging my head on the low doorway. I stand up to my full height and pull my hood back, searching the small house for any sign of Pallando. "I'll be up in a moment! Just give me a moment Ca-I mean-Amarth!"

I roll my eyes and walk absently over to the small fireplace. It's unlit at the moment which isn't anything unusual, Pallando only lights it at night. I unstrap my swords from my back and set them up against the wall before unclasping the silver brooch that keeps my cloak fastened about my shoulders. Underneath the cloak, I wear a simple black shirt that covers my arms, black pants, and of course black boots.

What can I say? Black is my color just as blue is Pallando's.

I drape my cloak across the oak chair Pallando made for me when I come to visit. After I discovered that the wizard wasn't dead we found a place where he could rebuild his home. It's much smaller than the last one he lived in, and instead of an upstairs he somehow made a large cellar for storing extra food and other such things below the house. That's where he was now, doing what I don't know and I wasn't about to go down there and see. 

There are two bedrooms, one for Pallando and one for me when I stop by. Then there's the small kitchen, a washroom, and of course the living area where Pallando spends most of his time. The entrance to the cellar is in the kitchen and is marked by a trap door that has to remain propped up with a wooden pole lest it falls and trap whoever is down there inside.

I hear the soft tapping of Pallando's boots and the shuffling of his clothes that alerts me of his coming up the stairs. A few seconds later a head crowned with white, shoulder length, hair appears along with ancient, blue eyes, a kind face, white, scraggly beard; ah Pallando, he always looks the same no matter how long I leave on my travels.

"Did you miss me?" I ask watching as he removes the pole holding up the trap door.

"Oh Ca- Amarth, of course, I missed you. It's always so quiet here when you're gone." I notice that he's carrying something in his hands, a small box. 

"What is that?" I ask stepping towards him.

"This? It is nothing you need to concern yourself with Ca- Amarth! I'm sorry, I've been quite distracted the past few days." Pallando sets the wooden box on the table in the kitchen before turning his gaze on me, only to grunt in annoyance when he sees that my attention is fixed on the box.

"Ahem," Pallando clears his throat impatiently.

"Sorry," I tear my wandering eyes from the box and focus completely on Pallando, "I'm just curious is all."

"That curiosity of yours is always getting you into trouble." Pallando snaps and for a moment I'm shocked at his tone. Pallando never talks to me this way; unless he's worried about something.

"Pallando, is there something wrong?" I'm starting to worry about him, there's something wrong I know it. However; Pallando smiles and shakes his head.

"Oh forgive me Amarth, I'm just a little tired is all. I've been busy while you were gone." Pallando shuffles out of the kitchen and towards his own chair in front of the fireplace. I follow behind him, only after taking one last look at the box.

"Busy with what?" I ask sitting myself down beside him.

"I've been doing a bit of traveling myself if you must know," Pallando replied sounding very pleased with himself. "I've gone to some of the lands north of here and let me tell you Amarth I have seen some of the most interesting things!"

I let him go on and on about his "expedition" as he calls it; nodding my head and adding the occasional comment when necessary. Yet ever did my thoughts drift to the box on the table, what was in it? After Pallando finishes his tale he asks if I'm hungry: I'm not but I allow him to cook me a meal anyway. 

Pallando lives to serve people, it's what he enjoys more than anything besides creating, taking care of others. After fixing me a hearty meal of fried trout and chips with roasted mushrooms (a personal favorite of mine) he sits down in front of me and keeps me company while I eat, asking about my own travels.

There isn't much to tell him; I've been traveling around the east from village to village, mainly to distract myself from the ever dreaded thoughts that plague my mind. I decide that this would be a good time to ask Pallando about my visions, but the moment I think of Elwin standing in her bloodied dress, my mouth goes dry and my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth. No, I won't tell him, not yet anyway.

Night soon falls and Pallando and I continue to talk until I'm ready to retire for the night. Usually, I stay up later, but after traveling for so long I'm ready for a long rest in a soft bed. I go to my room and change from my traveling clothes into a blue, loose fitting shirt with grey trousers. I settle in my bed and will sleep to come to me, only it doesn't.

Why? Because my stupid mind keeps wandering back to the box Pallando left on the table. It was still there when I went to my room, surely it's still there now? I debate on whether or not I should go and take a look at it; why shouldn't I? What would the harm be in taking a little peek? I sit up in bed and set my blanket aside. 

When I think about it, Pallando never said that I shouldn't look inside the box, he only said that it wasn't something I needed to concern myself with.

But since I willingly want to concern myself with it, then I have every right to go and look at the box.

Having made up my mind I swing my legs over the side of my bed and gently set me feet on the wooden floor. Without making a sound I creep over to the door and open it, wincing as it creaks slightly. If I'm lucky Pallando will think I'm just going to the washroom to relieve myself, if I'm unlucky and he sees me I can use that as my excuse. If he doesn't believe me, I can always run, he's not very fast.

Cautiously I tiptoe down the short hallway towards the kitchen, I can't hear any snoring which unsettles me because Pallando is a snorer. A wise person would go back to their room, but I'm not very wise at all. I am reckless and dangerous. Entering the kitchen I see the box lying exactly where Pallando left it. The fact that it's dark makes no difference to an elf, I can see just fine. Approaching the table I take care not to bump into the chairs on either side of the table. 

My hand closes around the box and a rush of excitement flows through me. I lift the box up and pull it close to my chest. Just a quick look and I'll be satisfied, then I can go back to my room and forget all about it. I find that the box doesn't have a lock, which is reassuring when you think about it. If there was something in here that Pallando absolutely did not want me to see, then there would be a lock on it. Since there isn't I can assume that there is nothing wrong with me looking inside it.

Grinning like a child about to eat stolen sweets, I open the lid and peer into the box. Only to see that it's empty. Though I'm disappointed and confused, I have to say I saw this coming. Of course, Pallando would remove whatever was in here! The question is why? What was in here and why doesn't Pallando want me-

A match is struck and a candle is lit. Looking up, face flushed in embarrassment, I see Pallando standing in front of me, a look of disappointment on his face. Now might be a good time to run...