The past few weeks have seen Delaney more preoccupied than usual. If he's not focusing on work, he's spending the majority of his time with Eli. Somehow they've fallen into an easy and comfortable routine. It's almost as if they've known each other much longer than the couple of months they have. Because of his preoccupation with this new facet of life, he's not been as hyper focused on the one thing he usually is. Which is how he ends up missing the warning signs that his heat is approaching.

He's usually very diligent about keeping track of the pre-heat symptoms, however, sitting at his desk, trying not to giggle softly at something silly Eli text him, he dismisses the warmth spreading throughout his body as the same happiness he feels whenever he's around Eli. Which, his feelings are something he has yet to look at in depth.

He can focus on those later.

A few hours later when Malik comes to speak with him about Tristin's aggressive form of flirting, it's the alpha that points out,

"You smell."

Delaney stares blankly at Malik. "Do you not want to work here?"

"Technically, you don't have the authority to fire me. The owners of the building do."

Delaney interrupts, holding his hand up to stop the alpha from speaking, "What do you mean, I smell?"

"Your scent," Malik clarifies. "Usually it's very mild, difficult to pick up at times. But now it's very clear. It's very comforting." He flashes a small smile.

Delaney frowns, his mind working quickly to try to identify whether or not he used perfume that does augment his scent. He does every once in a while, but he can't recall the last time he has. He shrugs off Malik's observation and guides the conversation back to Tristin. "So you're bringing me this information because you'd like me to do, what exactly?" Delaney is surprised when Malik, a 6'2", muscular, and slightly intimidating alpha lowers his eyes to the floor, a small smile flirting with the corners of his mouth.

"Please inform him that I take my job very seriously and he's making it slightly difficult to maintain the level of professionalism my employers expect."

"Oh," Delaney chuckles, "You like him?"

"He's attractive."

"You li–" Delaney inhales sharply as a searing pain shoots through his abdomen. His fingers grip his stomach, his mind believing that if he held on tight enough, the pain would fade. However, another stabbing sensation cuts through his middle and his knee comes up to join his hand in applying pressure against his belly.

"Sir?" Malik's voice is tight with concern.

Delaney hangs his head, his eyes closed tightly as he takes in deep breaths through his nostrils. He grits out between clenched teeth, "Call. Tristin." Malik's out of the room without a reply, leaving Delaney hunched over his desk.

How can he have been so foolish to not keep track of his symptoms?

Maybe it was purposeful.

That doesn't make any sense to him, so he forces his mind to quiet, focusing on his breathing and managing the pain as another sharp twinge had his body shuddering. Within ten minutes, he's able to pick up Tristin's scent. A strong grip is around his arm, pulling him up to his feet.

"What are you doing at work?! You never work when your heat cycle is starting!" Tristin fusses.

"I--I forgot about it," Delaney weakly explains.

Tristin is practically dragging him to the elevator all the while muttering underneath his breath, "How can you forget?"

"They only come once a year," Delaney snaps as they enter the elevator. Another hot flash has sweat beading along his brow, causing his hair to stick to his forehead.

"What do you mean?" Tristin looks down at Delaney. His brows are drawn together and his eyes slightly narrowed in confusion. "I thought heat cycles came every two months."

It's not that he doesn't want to deal with this, it's that right now, Delaney literally cannot. Not in the midst of feeling so awfully. "Shut up, please. I have a terrible migraine, it's hot, and my body feels as if there is something foreign nestled deep inside of me that is trying to tunnel its way out."

"I forget how much of a bitch you are when you're in heat. Maybe you should call Eli. Pretty sure taking dick is supposed to help you all through this."

Delaney glares up at Tristin. "If you say another word I will not tell you what Malik told m—," he hisses loudly as pain causes him to double over. He grips his knees, trying to steady himself as the world spins.

"As much as I want to ask what Malik told you, I'm not that big of an asshole. C'mon." Tristin scoops Delaney into his arms, despite his protests. "This is faster than trying to drag you across the parking structure. Yell at me after you come up with a better explanation as to why you're trying to work through your heat."

Delaney barely remembers being buckled into the car and Tristin stopping at a convenience store before immense fatigue washes over him, causing him to succumb to a fitful sleep.

Day One

The dreams are the worst. He spends the majority of the first day drifting in and out of sleep. Delaney wakes up from them the same way each time, crying out the last syllable to a name he'll never get to bestow upon the child that's ripped from his arms. Or sometimes he wakes up crying, clutching a pillow to his chest as a faceless nurse takes his baby. The repeated, "bring him back," is what wakes him up. His tears stain his pillow, making his face damp, but he can't bring himself to move. Not until another flash of pain has him curling up in a tight ball and gasping for breath.

He wants to cry out that it's unfair. It doesn't make any fucking sense why he has to go through the pain of a heat cycle if he'll never be able to have what going into heat means for an omega. Long after the pain subsides, he's still curled up in a ball, his hand on his empty womb, weeping openly.

The thought from earlier in the day returns and it finally makes sense.

He purposefully ignored the pre-heat symptoms because he wanted to ignore the heat. He wanted to forget that his body will remind him of what he's supposed to do, but can't. For a while it worked. It was nice to forget that he wasn't whole, but now he regrets this decision. He should have been taking the painkillers like his OB/GYN instructed—as soon as the symptoms begin, no matter how faint.

But now he's punishing himself, not wanting to pull out of the pain, but drowning in it as the physical aches mix with the emotions, and he's able to cry for what could have been but will never be.

Day Two

He's in the fetal position, not having slept at all after waking up from the last nightmare. His eyes are heavy and grainy as sleep threatens to pull him under. When his eyes droop shut, his body jolts, and he wakes up, blinking rapidly. He can't handle another nightmare. He can't survive seeing the same thing each time he closes his eyes, so he's resigned to not sleeping.

Delaney stares blankly at the wall, residual hiccuping sobs being the only sound that fills the room. He stopped crying about an hour ago, but he still sniffles every so often. He's trying to talk himself out of this deep despair by pointing out all of the good parts of his life.

His job.

His friendship with Tristin.

Eli.

His face flashes in Delaney's mind. His honey brown eyes are always so soft when he looks at Delaney. A few times, he's been caught openly staring, a soft grin on his mouth as he does.

Eli.

Delaney's heart clenches in his chest, a vice grip of emotional pain squeezing out his breath as he thinks about Eli. The alpha makes him happy. Happy in ways he hasn't felt in years and that excites him and scares him all at once. He knows the truth of his feelings—that he likes Eli—but he isn't supposed to like the alpha. He's supposed to enjoy the companionship and the sex. He's supposed to take all that's being offered and give next to nothing in return, with no regrets. However, he can't. He finds himself wanting to open up to Eli. Especially in those quiet moments when it seems like the world has faded and it's just the two of them. In those moments he wants to tell Eli the truth, wants to lay himself bare before the alpha and ask if he can ever accept an omega that can't—can't give him kids. He wants to know if Eli can overlook his own biological instincts to procreate and if he's okay with his days being filled with only Delaney. Could that, no, would that be enough for him?

Much to his dismay, he still has more tears to shed.

Day Three

Delaney thought the pain was going to be the worst part of this cycle. He's wildly incorrect.

It's a slow creeping heat that begins in his toes. He's halfway asleep when the warm tingling spreads up his legs and into his abdomen. He shifts, slightly uncomfortable as the sensation begins to concentrate just at his core. A sleepy sigh rolls over his lips as the warmth begins to settle heavily, pooling thickly in his gut. The sheets beneath him grow wet with his slick as his hips undulate slowly, seemingly having a mind of their own. With each little roll of his hips, his cock throbs, filling out at a slow pace, before it's erect and heavy against his stomach. The thin sheet covering him feels as if it's rubbing against every pleasurable nerve in his body. When he arches his back, rolling his hips up to seek friction he has yet to offer himself, the sheet slides against his heated skin, sending white hot sparks of pleasure racing through his body. He rolls over onto his side, spreading his knees open and propping one foot up on the bed as he gently prods between his ass to circle his rim.

His eyes roll shut as he eases his finger inside of his hole, a light gasp falling from between his slightly parted lips. His muscles clench tightly around his finger, squeezing and pulling him deeper as slick rushes out around the digit, dripping down his hand. He's never been this wet before. He's never felt this hot before. His insides are impossibly hot, but in the most pleasurable way possible, and the only thing he can think about is how good it would feel to have his heat wrapped around Eli's cock.

"Mmpphh," he bites down on his bottom lip as he pushes in a second finger. His hips bear down on his wrist and he pulls his fingers free, waits for a brief second, and pushes them back in deep enough to have his eyes rolling in the back of his head. His other hand comes down to close around his cock, his grip tight as his fist slides over slick skin. The fire in his belly grows to an unbearable degree as his hips chase his fist before rolling back onto his fingers. "Fuck," he moans loudly, his breath hitching in his chest as he fights to hold back from saying it. He fails miserably as he whimpers, two fingers becoming three in an attempt to replicate that same fullness. When it doesn't feel the same, when the flames licking at his nerves become too much to handle, he finds himself crying out for the only person that can give him what he wants.

Delaney moans loudly and at the sound of the alpha's name falling from his lips, his hole tightens around his fingers and his cock throbs hard in his fist. He says the alpha's name again, softly at first, until his movements become frantic, matching the frenzied build of arousal as it crescendos, an intense wave of pleasure washing over him as slick rushes between his legs, and he paints his chest in ropes of white.

The heat ebbs almost instantly. He pulls his fingers free, rolling over onto his back and exhaling shakily as he stares up at the ceiling. He's used to this part of his heat. He has a few toys that he'll play with every once in a while. But this? This was different.

"Eli," he mumbles.

It's the alpha. His stupid, perfect face. And his nice body. And his big, thick, cock.

Delaney shakes his head, pushing away thoughts of Eli. He doesn't need to think about him right now. He needs to think about getting through this heat with his sanity. He can't vacillate between deeply depressed and achingly horny. He needs to get his emotions under control.

Day Four

After spending almost all of yesterday masturbating, Delaney is worn out. Yet, that fire still simmers in his gut and he's grown to despise it. Nothing he does makes the heat fade all together. He's already tried a cold shower, followed by an intense two-hour work-out, followed by a cold bath, but in the bath, he ended up riding one of his toys and sobbing when his orgasm didn't feel as powerful as it does when he's with Eli.

He huffs a frustrated sigh as he sends a message.

[Delaney: Why haven't I heard from you in days?]

[Eli: I've been busy.]

[Delaney: Too busy to say hi? Or good morning?]

[Eli: The phone works both ways...]

[Delaney: I did text you]

[Eli: When?]

[Delaney: So now you're ignoring my messages?]

He glares at his phone, irrationally upset when Eli doesn't respond right away. He's in the middle of sending a scathing message when his phone vibrates and lights up in his hand. He swipes to answer it, placing it on speaker as he snaps,

"What do you want?"

A heavy sigh precedes Eli's wary voice. "Why are you picking a fight with me, Dee?"

His eyes narrow and he bites out, "I'm not."

"But you are. We haven't spoken to each other in a few days and this is how you decide to initiate conversation?"

"Whose fault is it that we haven't spoken in days?"

"I really don't want to fight with you."

"No one is fighting!" Delaney argues.

"Then what is wrong with you?" Eli bites back.

Delaney sounds absolutely petulant when he responds, "You. You're what's wrong with me."

"Look, I'm sorry I didn't call for a couple of days." As Eli tries to explain, he stammers out, It was—I had—,"

"Shut up," Delaney interrupts. "Listen to me because I'm probably not going to say this again. At least not outside of a heat cycle."

"You're in heat?" Eli mumbles, "No wonder."

"I'm going to pretend like I didn't hear that, which is definitely in your best interest. "

"I'm listening..." Eli trails off.

Delaney scowls. His heart races in his chest as he blurts out, "Ican'tstopthinkingaboutyou."

Eli sounds confused. "Huh? Slow down. I can't understand you."

Delaney inhales deeply and on the exhale, he slowly says, "I can't stop thinking about you, Eli."

"I heard you the first time. I just wanted to make sure I heard you right the first time."

"You're an asshole," Delaney gripes.

Eli tries to stifle his laughter, but it bleeds into his voice. "You like me though."

"Maybe," Delaney admits. He rolls over onto his side. "I miss you," he says softly.

Eli's voice is just as gentle as he replies, "I miss you too."

Delaney swallows thickly as he whispers, "Eli?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you come over?"

The implication hangs as heavy as the silence on the other end, but when Eli finally answers, his voice is deeper, huskier. "Send me your address."