Be careful what you wish for, it might come true.

Dorcas had heard this saying plenty of times, but it was only now that she experienced its true meaning. She had always wondered about who her real friends were - who would accept her unconditionally and who would abandon her when they found out that she liked girls. Now that most of the castle knew her secret, she was able to witness the true colour of people.

Maeve and Silver were, of course, more than supportive of her as she attempted to deal with the people shooting glares in her direction or simply just walking away from her when normally they would stop to say hi. When she went to sit at the Great Hall for breakfast, the people around her moved away, lowering their voices into hushed whispers as if they were scared she might infect them. Walking across the corridors proved painful as she would watch people pointing fingers at her, and had to tolerate the disgusting comments made by passing boys. The library was the worst of all; even the librarian didn't smile at her when she went over to borrow a book, giving her a suppressed humph in answer to a question she had asked. This coming from a teacher hurt much, much more than the entire castle combined.

Despite the obvious discrimination over something she couldn't control, Dorcas had gained love from the most unexpected of places. She was going to the Potions practice room one morning when she heard someone call her name from behind her. Tired of the increased catcalling, she hastened her pace and shouted over her shoulder, "I'm not going to kiss a girl for your amusement!" but the boy caught up and got into steps beside her.

"No, you misunderstood," he said apologetically. She slowed down to look at him, recognising him as a fourth year Gryffindor. He continued. "I just wanted to tell you that I admire you for being so brave. You don't deserve what you are going through, and I may not understand the pain you are under, but I want you to know that there are people who support you. There may not be many of them, but there's enough to make a difference."

She stopped walking and gave him a small smile. Her lips felt strange as she did so - she felt like she hadn't smiled in a long time. The boy smiled briefly and went on his way.

Another time was when she was in the kitchen - it was the only place outside of her dormitories where she could be alone as not many people knew of it. She was waiting for the house elves to bring her food when a tiny house elf trotted towards her and offered her a cupcake. "Here is a cupcake for Miss for all the trouble she is going through."

Dorcas was touched, although she kept wondering how they knew of what was going on up in the castle. Maybe they gossiped amongst themselves about the students. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she bit into the cupcake made just for her.

At the moment, Dorcas was in the seventh year girls' dormitories, lying in her bed and revising for the NEWTs. She tried to avoid leaving the comfort of the Gryffindor tower as much as she could, sometimes asking her friends to bring in food for her during mealtimes. She has also been avoiding Juliet.

Dorcas didn't know what Juliet thought of her now that her secret was out in the open. And she was too scared to find out.

After flipping aimlessly through a few pages, she closed her book and dropped it carelessly on the bed, letting out a deep sigh. The dorms were empty, allowing her to breathe freely for once, with no fear of anyone shooting her death glares or saying something nasty. She drew her legs closer to her and wrapped them in her arms, staring up at the ceiling.

She has always been terrified of people finding out, and the experience of watching people's reaction over her sexuality was excruciating to say the least. With every snide remark, every leer, every hateful glance, Dorcas felt herself sinking further and further into the ground, hating herself for being born this way. She hated that she was different, she hated that she felt no attraction towards boys, she hated having to live in fear of being herself.

Every time someone said something nasty to her in passing, she would feel tears building up in her eyes. But she would force them back, refusing to let them out for the world to witness. She would hold back the bubbling misery, the intense self loathing, the constant need to scream at the world, and when she would settle down in her bed at night, she would let it all out. She would bury her face into her pillow and weep and weep and weep until she would feel like she had no more tears left in her eyes and would slowly drift off into sleep.

Only a month left, she chanted to herself everyday. Only a month, and then I'll be out of this place for good.

It was amazing to think about how a couple of bigoted teenagers made her hate the place she used to call home.

Dorcas leaned over the bed and pulled out a parchment paper from the drawers along with a quill and an inkpot. She placed the paper in front of her, deciding to write a letter to her mother.

Mum, she wrote.

Her mind was blank. What would she write? What could she possibly write without making her mother scared or worried? She could lie, but she knew her mother would see through it. So she decided to be honest instead.

I miss you, Mum. Please get me away from her.

With a groan, she crumpled the paper into a ball and vanished it with a simple charm. She was starting to cry again and she rubbed her eyes furiously to keep tears from falling down her face. Jumping out of her bed, she began to pace along the aisle in the middle of the room, pulling her hair, kicking her bed, punching her pillow until the cotton began to come out. She didn't try to stop the tears anymore. She sat down on her bed and curled up into a ball before she started crying like a child.

Several minutes passed in silence save for the sound of her sobs. She poured herself some water into her goblet and drank it, then she poured some more water. Just then, the sound of the door clicking was heard and Heidi, one of her roommates walked in.

Heidi stopped upon seeing her. Dorcas realised she probably looked horrible - tears and snot running down her face, which was quite clearly red, and hair messy. She wouldn't be surprised if Heidi mistook her for a homeless person who had ended up in the seventh year girls' dormitories, somehow.

Dorcas ignored her and downed the water in her goblet, before depositing it on the table by her head. She was preparing to lie down when Heidi came up and said, "Hi, Dorcas."

She stared at her for a moment, responding with a soft, "Hey."

"May I sit?"

Dorcas looked at her bed where Heidi had gestured towards, as if she couldn't believe someone would want to sit with her. She nodded slowly, and Heidi sat gingerly by her leg.

"Do you want chocolates?" she asked suddenly, taking her by surprise. "I have some."

Dorcas couldn't believe her ears. Why would she offer her chocolates all of a sudden? But Heidi didn't wait for her answer. She fetched a box from her table and put it between them. "I bought them over the holiday and I still haven't finished them," she explained. "I'm kind of a miser when it comes to chocolates. I try to avoid eating them because I don't want it to end. You can have them whenever you like."

"Thanks," said Dorcas slowly.

"Look, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for what you're going through," Heidi began. "The people who are treating you this way are all backwards, ignorant bastards. You are a sweet, lovely girl, and I hope you have a future prettier than those people."

"Thank you, Heidi," Dorcas said impassively. She wasn't in the mood to listen to her, although she really was grateful for her words. She just wanted to lie down and sleep.

"I'll stop bothering you now," said Heidi, standing up. "One last thing though." She paused, eyeing her for a moment. "You probably don't know, but I've known that you were gay for quite a long time."

This snapped all the drowsiness from her body as Dorcas whipped around to look at her. "You knew? How?"

Heidi laughed a little. "Well, you three are quite loud when you talk. And sometimes you forget that I'm in the room."

Dorcas stared at her in shock. It was true. Heidi never really belonged amongst the three of them. She had a few friends in Hufflepuff, and they were the ones she hung out with. She began to feel ashamed.

"Heidi, sit down," she said, scooting aside to make space for her. "Let's finish these chocolates."

Heidi seemed surprised, but she joined her and opened the box.

When they had almost finished half of the chocolates in the box, the door to the dormitory opened again and Maeve and Silver walked in with their heads held high and chests puffed out, looking extremely proud of themselves. "Chocolate!" Silver exclaimed and joined them on the bed. Maeve offered a bright smile to Dorcas and sat down as well.

"Why do you look so happy?" Dorcas asked, eyeing them suspiciously.

"We had a little chat with Cillian," answered Maeve innocently, checking her nails.

"Little chat?" she asked, suppressing a smile.

"Yes," agreed Silver. "We just told him that what he did wasn't cool."

"Just told?"

They both nodded their heads, still wearing the haughty smiles on their faces. Dorcas found herself laughing suddenly. It felt good.

"And what exactly did you do?"

"Just a little talk," they answered together.

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this chapter is terrible i'm sorry