"I am late, aren't I?"

As soon as I turned, I saw him entering through the oak door with a bouquet of magnolias in one hand.

His dark brown hair was reflected under the magic stones. It was a dull hair color, but it was a color that went well with the man's aristocratic face and green eyes.

"Uncle Leander," I greeted with a smile, trying to mask the disappointment in my heart.

"Ah, my favorite niece." He started walking toward me. "Seeing that you're already here, it seems like I'm really late."

Just like me, every year Uncle Leander also visited my mother's grave on her birthday, but it was unusual for us to cross paths since he usually came in the early morning and immediately went back to the capital after he finished.

Duke Leander Elloid was a busy man. There were a lot of unkind things that people could say about him, but he definitely didn't shy away from hard work.

Though he never let it show that he was tired or didn't get enough sleep—having the caretaking of an entire territory and countless businesses as well as the responsibility as the head of the council in his hands weren't exactly an easy job. I guess that was what we both had in common—us, Elloid were truly a prideful and stubborn sort.

This is why people say that I am more an Elloid than I ever am a Berenice, even though my last name is Berenice.

But anyway, my uncle never liked leaving his duties for too long, especially now that he became busier after he was appointed as Constantine's supervisor as well as the noble's representative for my development project. So yes, despite his eccentric and overbearing personality, he was not the type to take his job lightly.

Yet such a man always set aside his time to visit his sister's grave several times a year. If it didn't speak volumes of how much he cherished his older sister, I didn't know what did.

"At least you get to see me so that you wouldn't forget your one and only niece's face with how busy you have been as of late, Uncle," I finally replied.

"As if you even have to try. How could I forget such a smooth-talker?" He looked at me in amusement before bursting into laughter. "Your skills seem to be improving a lot, my dear niece."

My uncle stopped in front of me and smiled. Everything about him was ornate and extravagant. He was dressed in an exquisite formal suit, decorated with pure gold threads and gemstones and the finest fabrics that served no purpose except to remind people of his status and wealth.

Though a bit tacky, I had to admit, it was fitting for him.

"I only learned from the best, Uncle." I gave him an innocent smile.

He clicked his tongue. "What a cheeky little girl."

We giggled together.

His eyes softened and turned his head toward my mother's portrait in the center of the room, right above her grave. For once, I didn't see the usual arrogant mask I thought was permanently sewn to his face. It was a very new and strange feeling, to see this expression on him.

"You look more and more like your mother as you grow up," he murmured. "Sometimes when I look at you, I feel like I'm looking at my sister again, as if she's still alive and well. You do resemble her a lot."

"Do you miss her?" I let out a breath, trying to relieve the pressure that suddenly appeared in my chest.

I didn't know whether it was the atmosphere of the place or my mother's effect that was manifesting through her portrait, but people often dropped their guard in her presence. And as bizarre as it was to have this kind of conservation with my infamously annoying uncle, it strangely felt so natural, too.

"Every day," he answered after a while.

I lifted my head to meet his gaze. His vivid emerald eyes looked unusually sad.

He gave me a pained smile, and my own grew as I watched him, trying to comfort him in some way before my mind went into a whirlwind of uncontrollable thoughts.

When I first remembered my past life and realized that I was now reincarnated inside a novel, the thought that I had little power because I had knowledge about this world was what helped me control my thoughts and myself. It was the idea that this was all a book and I knew what was going to happen that comforted me and helped me feel like I had an advantage.

But when was my life ever that easy?

My actions impacted the storyline, so things were no longer happening the way it did in the book. What mattered now was what I did, so everything I knew about the plot was not important anymore.

Though nothing really changed about my anger and resentment toward this book-world, something was obviously changing with the way things developed.

It could be the butterfly effect of my actions, but my relationship with Arsen and my family was definitely so much better compared to the first timeline.

One time when I was concocting my plan, I ended up spending hours and hours thinking about why my uncle didn't help me in the first timeline, but despite how many times I thought about it, a lot of things just didn't add up. Something was definitely amiss.

My uncle was too proud to ever let someone like Constantine take over the empire. I was his niece and an important chess piece in this game of thrones, so it wasn't likely that he would abandon me, unless... Constantine threatened him using his family.

My cousin, Daphne, and the duchess had gone south to the Elloid estate around the time of the rebellion, so I wouldn't put it past that sly bastard to have captured them and shackled my uncle with their safety.

Of course I couldn't be sure whether my theory was right or not. It could be just this world's plot armor to make sure that the storyline was followed in the first timeline for all I knew, but either way, what was more important was to have him on my side this time.

Yes, the more people on my side, the better.

The thought reduced the heavy burden in my heart, even just a little.

It means you are one less person I have to curse.

"My sister, Odette..." My uncle murmured and I snapped out of my existential thoughts.

"Huh?"

"...growing up, I always looked up to her. I admired her a lot and she's always been my role model."

I flustered a bit at his sudden confession.

I always knew that my uncle adored my mother, but this was the first time I heard him admit it out loud, especially to me.

My uncle and I never really had a heart-to-heart conversation before. I didn't know what suddenly possessed him to do it now.

Maybe the nostalgic memories of his beloved sister had mellowed him a bit.

It was no surprise that he grew up to be as conceited as he was if his role model had been Odette Elloid.

Not that I could judge him, since I was pretty much the same.

"My sister was the type of person who wanted many things even when she already had a lot. And when she wanted something, whether it was an object or a person, she would go for it until the end," he said. "She never failed until... well, until her disastrous betrothal with Calisto."

I nodded in understanding. It was a well-known fact after all.

"I still remember how angry she was about it—her pride was badly hurt." Uncle Leander gave me a wry smile. "Do you know how surprised I was when she had easily agreed to your grandfather's suggestion of marrying your father? Well, I guess he was the best candidate at that time—and combining our families would do us good to keep the imperial family in check."

Considering how the imperial family struggled to maintain their power after that and how Arsen had to endure all the scorn from high-ranking nobles for years, I guess my mother's revenge had been successful after all.

"I'm sure she gave them a hard time." I chuckled.

"Oh, she did. Not that they gave her any reason not to be resentful—after all, they gave her a hard time as well."

"They did?"

"You know that your mother had a hard time conceiving," he stated matter of factly.

Oh, that... I nodded.

"My sister was barely eighteen when she married Kaydeen, and seeing the bastard child of her husband, no doubt she was eager for her own little one as well." He glanced at me before opening his mouth again, "She wanted you, Calypso, so badly, but what she wanted wasn't coming. To make it worse, the empress's pregnancy was announced not long after her official wedding with the emperor." He clucked his tongue.

"I can only imagine. It must have felt like rubbing salt on an open wound."

"Oh, you have no idea." He grimaced. "I was so shocked that one time my sister came to visit me in the capital. She hadn't even sent a notice beforehand, but she was at my doorstep one night. She was like a mad woman. It was so unlike her. For a second, I thought it must've been a doppelganger."

He stared at his sister's portrait with that sad look again.

"I barely said anything. I touched her shoulder, maybe, and said 'Are you okay, sister?' or something inconsequential like that, and she came apart. She was weeping so hard that she could barely stand. I never saw my sister lose her composure like that. Apparently, she'd gone to a friend's pregnancy celebration. She was telling me all of this in quite an emotional state, you understand. I didn't think my sister would be the type to confide in her friend that she was having difficulty getting pregnant, but it seemed like she mentioned something, and her friend said something foolish and insensitive. That much was perfectly clear. She made some thoughtless joke about, 'Oh, help yourself to one of mine,' and my sister took it as unendurable cruelty. She half-convinced herself that her friend was doing this to her on purpose, having babies one after another like that. Well, that friend's thriving family business plummeted to the ground not long after that. Last I heard, their properties were confiscated by a loan shark and they could barely make a living and decided to move to a village. I suspected that my sister had a part in that, but that's not the point—"

Well, that sounds like something my mother would do.

But what caught my attention was the part when he said my mother had been weeping. I had lived with her for fourteen years, and never once had I ever seen her cry with genuine tears. I saw her shed crocodile tears a few times to put on a show, but they didn't count.

"By the time she managed to tell me the whole thing, she was digging at her stomach with her nails, like she thought she could crawl inside herself and find you hiding somewhere. I was trying to calm her down and pull her hands off. I had her by the wrists, and she looked me right in the face and said, 'Why isn't this happening?' I've never heard her voice sound like that. I've never heard anyone sound like that."

It must have felt like the end of the world for someone like Odette Elloid to have her reality check and be told that she couldn't do something. Not to mention the aftereffects several miscarriages must have taken on her mental and physical state.

"She had you two years later, but by then, of course the damage was long done. There was no missing your birth. It was all over every announcement board and newspaper. She took out two full pages. You were her miracle and her treasure and her world from the moment she saw you and nothing and no one could ever change that. It's bound into every strand of who she is."

I snorted. "For someone who was supposed to love me, she sure had a strange way of showing it."

He looked at me with a raised eyebrow. "She only wanted the best for you, Calypso. Do you know how much ridicule she received when she failed to be an empress? Of course she paid back those who dared disrespect her tenfold, but it still wasn't a pleasant experience. She never want that for you."

"Was that why she wanted me to live her own dream?"

"If you put it that way, then probably yes. She had a lot of greed and she didn't like it if she wasn't the best, but you, Calypso, were her biggest pride—probably the only one she allowed to be better than her. And that was why she wanted you to sit in the highest position so that no one could look down on you. So that you won't have to bow to anyone. But more than anything, she wished for you to be strong enough so even when you face any misfortune in the future, you wouldn't be shaken up."

I couldn't trust myself to respond.

Uncle Leander reached out toward my mother's painting, fingertips just brushing against the smooth surface. "Did you know that I promised my sister to assist you in becoming a great empress?"

"I have guessed."

"I would have taken you under my wing regardless. After all, you're my niece, but yes, I also wanted to honor my sister's last wish. I'm sorry that it means I have to be a little harsh on you sometimes, but please know that I always have your best interest in mind." He continued upon seeing my disbelief, "We may have our differences, but nothing is more important than family. We are family, and family takes care of each other."

"Uncle..." I cleared my throat and asked him the question that had been bugging my mind since earlier. "Do you—do you think my mother would be disappointed in me if she could see me now?"

My uncle's face suddenly crinkled with sympathy. "Oh, my poor sister," he commented. "Is that what you think?"

"I mean, lately, I haven't exactly acted like the perfect empress she always wanted me to be."

Uncle Leander was shaking his head. "You don't really understand your mother, do you?"

I don't. It would be impossible to completely understand my mother's mind even though I lived with her most of my life. No, it was impossible to completely understand someone in the first place. I didn't even understand myself.

"What do you mean?"

"Calypso, I'm trying to tell you that she'd love you no matter what. She might not be the affectionate type, but in truth, there is nothing you can do to disappoint her enough to diminish that."

I stared at him in wonder, mouth slightly agape.

My surprise hadn't subsided yet when Uncle Leander suddenly turned to me and frowned. "But I will. I will be disappointed in you if you keep on doing undignified things. We have a reputation to keep after all. Do you understand?"

I started coughing violently, trying to mask my bubbling laughter at his sudden declaration.

Ah yes, this is the uncle I know.

It was fortunate that he returned to his usual annoying self at the right moment. If it would have been longer, I might be convinced that he was possessed. "Yes, uncle. I'll keep that in mind."

"Good."

There was a moment of silence before Uncle Leander stepped forward and put down the bouquet of magnolias that he had been holding on my mother's grave.

Magnolia symbolized nobility, perseverance, and dignity. It suited my mother.

He then took out a bottle of wine from his coat. It was my mother's favorite—one of the rarest and most expensive. He uncorked the bottle before saying cheers and poured all the content around my mother's grave.

I stepped forward and started rearranging the flowers to make them look prettier when my eyes caught sight of a bouquet of red carnations at the corner.

There were a lot of flowers on and around her grave, but the red carnations always stood out to me. It was the only flower that was a constant presence on this occasion; same as my uncle's magnolia and my calla lily.

My guess was another person also always came to her grave every year, though I had no idea who it was. My mother didn't have a lot of friends, but she had a lot of loyal servants. "It must be one of them," I muttered. "Maybe her butler? Or lady-in-waiting?"

Uncle Leander frowned. "What do you mean?"

"These carnations. They're always here every year. They're from one of her servants, aren't they?"

"No, it's from your father," he answered simply.

My eyes widened in confusion and for a moment. I thought I had misheard him. "My father? As in Duke Kaydeen Berenice?"

"Do you have other father?" He rolled his eyes. "Of course it's Kaydeen. Who else?"

I tried to process what he said. "I thought my father wasn't fond enough of my mother to have a servant come every year with flowers."

Now it was my uncle's turn to look at me weirdly. "You really don't know your parents, do you? Your father never ordered a servant to send flowers. He always comes to deliver the flowers himself at the earliest of dawn, and it's not even the whole thing..."

"Huh?" I blinked.

"I came a bit late today so I didn't meet him, but have crossed paths with him several times before."

What?

"At first I was curious as to why he visited my sister's grave so often, so I decided to ask his butler and what he said was pretty surprising."

"What did he say?" I asked, curious.

"Apparently your father visits your mother's grave to bring her flowers at least thrice a week. It's always the same flower too; red carnations. That's how I immediately knew it was from your father."

I tilted my head in confusion. "Why would he do that?"

"He brought flowers for his wife whom he had been married to for years. What's so strange about that?" He raised his brow in a teasing manner.

"But it's my father and mother we're talking about. I never saw them being affectionate to one another except to put on a show and I don't think they even loved each other."

"I never thought you would be so narrow-minded, my dear niece." He laughed and it only made me more confused. "You don't need to love someone—at least not that way—to cherish them, you know."

"Hmm... I guess so?" I responded dumbly, unconvinced.

But I was baffled and pretty much embarrassed for being called narrow-minded by my annoying uncle of all people. He was the last person that I would expect to lecture me about how relationships work. It made me feel so inadequate.

"I could be wrong, but I like to think of myself as a good observer, and from what I observed of your parents throughout the years, I could tell that they loved each other—as in the kind of love between friends without attraction."

What the—

Was he talking about platonic love? My mother and father?

No matter how I looked at it, it was just so hard to believe, but more than that, why did it hit home so hard?

Is it because Arsen and I are the same?

I bit my lip as I could feel the stinging pain in my chest.

No, it's different between us.

It's more complicated than that.

I stared at my uncle without really seeing him, thinking of my own relationship with Arsen, and I came up with a harrowing conclusion: madness.

Do you know what madness is? It's to go on romantically loving a man who loves you platonically.

Hah... This is why my life story is a tragedy.

I sighed and a self-deprecating smirk curled at the corner of my lip.

Apparently madness wants to hug me, insanity wants to kiss me, and I am being courted by every fucking thing that will only bring ruin, ruin, and ruin.

"You don't believe me, do you?" My uncle's voice tore through the air and snapped me back to the present.

"A bit," I replied. "To be honest, it's hard to imagine them having something more than a business relationship."

"Unfortunately, I don't think I'm the right person to satisfy your curiosity." He shrugged nonchalantly. "You might have to ask him yourself."

Very unlikely...

"Anyway, I think it's time for me to go. I still have a lot of business to take care of," he announced as he dusted the dirt from his palm. "I'll see you around, Calypso."

"Yes, Uncle."

After bidding the busy man goodbye with the promise of having a meal together sometime, I stood still in front of my mother's grave, deep in thought.

Monochrome characters.

Not just black or white, apparently gray exists, too.

My eyes lingered on the bouquet of red carnations. The double layer of petals with crinkly edges created a frilly, beautiful flower, and I subconsciously reached out my hand to touch them.

Does my father even know what red carnation means?

In the language of flowers—because according to my mother, reading flowers was something a high-standing woman should know—in the case of carnations, color meant everything. White meant sweet and lovely, pink was often given as a heartfelt sign of gratitude, while yellow symbolized disdain. But red... I will never forget you—my heart aches for you.

It was said that the deep red petals of the red carnation represented a beating heart. It was also a symbol of distinction, as it referred to someone who stood out among the crowd and captured everyone's attention. However, paradoxically, red carnations were also related to death, as they were often used in offerings and wreaths that adorn funerals and cemeteries, thus their presence reminded us of someone who was dear to us but wasn't there.

"Anyone that has character leaves a mark on another," I whispered. "How satisfying it must be for you, because it seems like you succeed in leaving a mark on everyone around you, Mother."

***

Author's Note:

Did you expect that it would be her uncle? I know that most of you guessed "Arsen." Lol... What do you think about Calypso's little chit-chat with her uncle? I think people started warming up to him ever since we got a little of his perspective. We've come a long way, guys! Oh, and what do you think about Calypso's father and mother? Please let me know your opinion.

I had a lot of fun writing about Calypso's mother. She's a very interesting character indeed. Some people even told me that we need a separate story about her mother. Well, I'm considering it. I might write a side story about her once I finished with the main story. But for now, I'm going to focus on the main story.

By the way, a few days ago I listened to a song that somehow reminded me of Calypso, and all of sudden, I started crying. It was when I realized that I'm truly emotionally attached to my characters. Maybe this is the reason why it's so hard for me to work on several stories at once. The characters are like my babies, and it's so hard for me to divide my love and attention for too many of them. Hahaha...

The theme song for this chapter doesn't exactly describe Odette, though a few lines could totally resonate with her. But I think Calypso or even Leander could probably relate to this song when thinking about the late Odette.

Marjorie - Taylor Swift

Never be so kind
You forget to be clever
Never be so clever
You forget to be kind

And if I didn't know better
I'd think you were talking to me now
If I didn't know better
I'd think you were still around

What died didn't stay dead
What died didn't stay dead
You're alive, you're alive in my head
What died didn't stay dead
What died didn't stay dead
You're alive, so alive

Never be so politе
You forget your power
Nevеr wield such power
You forget to be polite

And if I didn't know better
I'd think you were listening to me now
If I didn't know better
I'd think you were still around

What died didn't stay dead
What died didn't stay dead
You're alive, you're alive in my head
What died didn't stay dead
What died didn't stay dead
You're alive, so alive

The autumn chill that wakes me up
You loved the amber skies so much
Long limbs and frozen swims
You'd always go past where our feet could touch
And I complained the whole way there
The car ride back and up the stairs
I should've asked you questions
I should've asked you how to be
Asked you to write it down for me
Should've kept every grocery store receipt
'Cause every scrap of you would be taken from me
Watched as you signed your name: Marjorie
All your closets of backlogged dreams
And how you left them all to me

What died didn't stay dead
What died didn't stay dead
You're alive, you're alive in my head
What died didn't stay dead
What died didn't stay dead
You're alive, so alive

And if I didn't know better
I'd think you were singing to me now
If I didn't know better
I'd think you were still around
I know better
But I still feel you all around
I know better
But you're still around

https://youtu.be/hP6QpMeSG6s

Bonus picture:

Odette Elloid