I could hear my phone going off in my bedroom as we started to head for the kitchen. "Let me grab that, and I'll meet you downstairs," I said to Jess.

"Ok cool," she responded.

Quickly, I hurried to my room and began to search for the phone, "where is it? I could have sworn it was under the pillow," I said, talking out loud to myself. Finally, I had found it lying on the floor. Hmm, I must've knocked it out of the bed last night, I thought.

"Oh my god!" I said, as I took off and ran downstairs heading for Jess.

"What, who was it?" she asked, as I walked towards her in shock.

"Carter..." I replied.

Her eyes grew big as she smiled, "well, what did he say?"

"Good morning Emery," I said, with a smirk.

"Did you respond?"

"No, not yet."

"Ok so what are you waiting for? Say something..." she insisted.

"What should I say?" I asked, becoming nervous.

"What do you mean?" she chuckled, "how about good morning Carter..., how are you?" she said, sarcastically.

My mind went blank, trying to deal with last night and this morning, and now Carter trying to reach out to me, it was way too much going on, and I just could not think.

"Emery...!" Jess said loudly, "snap out of it, you're like stuck in space."

"Ok... ok. I'll just text what you said," I uttered and shook my head, as I came out of a daze. "Good," she replied.

Good morning Carter, how are you?

"There I sent it," I sighed, as I hopped up onto the counter.

"Nervous...?" she asked, while pouring the eggs into the frying pan.

"I am actually."

"Why Em...? he's just a man," she assured me, as she looked back at me with a grin.

"It's just..., how do you tell someone about your nightmares and depression? Plus, that whole thing about him being a paramedic, this is crazy." I said, as I rolled my eyes.

"Don't be so hard on yourself," she responded, while grabbing the bacon out of the fridge. "Ugh...! I just feel like he will look down on me if he finds out

about everything," I assumed.

"He won't," she thought.

"And how do you know that for sure?" my eyes squinted, as I wondered.

"Why would he? does he seem like he would judge you?"

"No, I don't think so... well actually, I really don't know," I said in confusion, "I just think at this point I'm too damaged for him," I believed.

"You're not damaged Emery... come on, we just talked about this right?" she said, strongly. "I mean, I get that I can't possibly understand the hurt and pain that you carry every day, but I do know that you can't let this take over your life, or you will never be happy again," she believed.

"Happy...! how could I ever be happy knowing that I was the cause..." I cringed.

Her eyes narrowed over to mine, and I could tell that she was hurt by what I said, and before she could say anything, the phone started to vibrate.

"He said he's doing good, and asked if I was free today," I said, changing the subject as I took a deep breath. "Well you're not doing anything today are you?" she asked.

Even though she was bothered by what I said, she was willing to change the subject as well. "No, I don't think I have anything to do," I responded.

"So why don't you go hang out with him today, maybe he can distract your mind in a good way, at least give him a chance to anyway," she suggested, as she handed me my plate of food. I thought about it for a few seconds as I ate my piece of bacon, "maybe you're right, I guess..." I said, picking up my phone to respond back.

Yes I'm free, I text, and quickly he responded.

I have to do a shift tonight but I'm free until then, I would like to see you, is that cool?

Sure ... where should I meet you?

Your choice.

I paused for a moment and tried to think of a place to meet him, but only one place came to my mind.

Meet me at the place where you first met me at 3:00

The wooded area?

Exactly, there's a lake beyond the woods, I'll be there.

Ok cool.

As I looked up at Jess with a raise of an eyebrow she asked, "so, are you seeing him?"

"I told him I would hang out with him for a while, and that I will meet up with him around 3," I responded.

"Great!" she said excitingly, "hopefully, this will cheer you up a bit, you know..." she hoped.

"Yeah..." I sighed.

"So where are you meeting him?" she asked, curiously.

"At the diner," I lied.

I knew she would have never agreed if I had told her where I really was going.

"Do you have any idea as to what you're going to wear?" she pondered.

"I have no clue," I responded, as I jumped down off of the counter to throw my plate into the sink. "I'm going to my room now to see what I can put together," I exhaled, still thinking about the lie I just told her.

"I'm sure you will find something Em," she said, with a grin.