[049] one final choice

                                                                       Suki wakes up to the sound of noises and commotion, feeling dizzy as she tried to get up and see what was going on. But Suki's determination to see what was going on overrode how awful she felt. She sits up and looks over at Lottie who was still asleep. But just as Suki tries to gather her bearings, she hears the sound of Travis screaming. It was absolutely haunting and a shiver goes down Suki's spine as she registers the terrifying sound. She didn't know what was going on but she automatically thought the worst.

                                                                        After all, Suki couldn't forget the vision she had earlier. Suki suspected that maybe it had something to do with what was going on. But, of course, Suki only had one way to find out.

                                                                        With a groan, Suki crawls over to the wall and uses it to help and support her own weight as she picked herself up from off of the floor. And then she slowly wandered over to the window, seeing exactly what was going on outside. She could see others beginning to head inside, their faces seemingly devoid of emotion. Travis was the only truly emotional one, and Suki would soon figure out why.

                                                                       She'd see a dead Javi being carried around on a log by the other girls, his skin pale and his body utterly lifeless. Suki almost wondered if she was enduring yet another nightmare. Or a terrible vision. But it quickly became apparent that it was all very real and Suki just backs away from the window in absolute horror. Suki had no idea what had happened and how Javi had ended up dead.

                                                                      But Suki knew that with Javi dead, it meant that their hunger was officially over. It was obvious that they weren't going to let his body go to waste and they planned on eating him, just like they did with Jackie. Perhaps Javi was better off having died during the time he was missing, rather than dying like this.

                                                                    "Suki?" Lottie calls her name.

                                                                     The girl turns to look at Lottie, going back down to the floor to be by her side. Her eye met Lottie's own bloodshot gaze and Lottie instinctively held onto her hand as she asks, "What's going on? I heard screaming. I thought I was dreaming but then I opened my eyes and I didn't see you beside me so I got worried."

                                                                   "It was Travis," Suki begins, her eye taking in Lottie's batterrd features. The swelling had gone down but her face was still bruised and bloodied, her eyes bloodshot as well.

                                                                   "Travis? What happened to Travis?" Lottie inquired.

                                                                     But just then, the entrance to the attic opened and both Misty and Courtney climbed back up to meet with Suki and Lottie. Suki looked over at her girlfriend, feeling more confused than ever. Even though she had clearly seen Javi's dead body out there in the snow, Courtney appeared to be as calm as ever - her and Misty.

                                                                   "You're awake, the both of you. And just in time too," Courtney remarked.

                                                                   "W - what's going on? Why is Travis screaming? What happened to Javi? I - I saw him...," Suki asks, despite already suspecting the answer. However, she wanted to hear the truth from her girlfriend and Misty.

                                                                     Lottie looks over at Suki, her eyes wide in both horror and confusion as she wondered what happened to Javi. Suki wouldn't have brought him up if everything was fine.

                                                                   "Javi died, Suki. The... the wilderness chose him and because of that, we'll finally be able to eat," Courtney answered.

                                                                   "What?" Suki and Lottie both ask at the same time, focusing their attention onto Courtney now.

                                                                   "It was supposed to be Natalie but... it's obvious that it just wasn't meant to be," Courtney adds with a frown.

                                                                    Courtney seemed more upset at the fact that Javi had died in Natalie's place, rather than the fact that Javi had died at all.

                                                                   "Did you guys kill him?" Suki demanded, wanting to know how Javi ended up dead when she had seen him fine just moments before.

                                                                   "No, I swear! We didn't even kill him... exactly. It's like Courtney said. The wilderness chose him and there was nothing we could do about it," Misty explained.

                                                                   "How?" Lottie asks as she begins to sit up, still holding onto Suki's hand.

                                                                    That was what Suki also wanted to know. How could this have happened? How could Javi be dead? She couldn't make sense of any of it. There was no way that this could be happening. None of it made any sense. And yet...

                                                                  "Look. I told them what you said to me. How you didn't want to go to waste. But... we need you, Lottie," Misty explained, causing Lottie to shake her head. "So... we drew cards. And whoever got the Queen... A-anyway, uh, Natalie, Natalie drew it. But then... during the chase, Javi - Javi died, so..."

                                                                    It was just like Suki's dream. Now it was all starting to fit together. She had seen exactly what had happened to Javi. The girls had been chasing after Natalie but... ended up bringing Javi back dead instead of her. The sacrifice was finally being complete and the wilderness had won once again.

                                                                  "Misty -," Lottie began to say.

                                                                  "It's okay. This is good. We have food now," Misty persisted.

                                                                  "Now we don't have to go hungry for a while," Courtney assured, giving Suki a small smile.

                                                                 "But this is wrong. It shouldn't have been him. I already told you -," Suki began to say.

                                                                 "And I already told you that that's not happening. You... and Lottie are both important. Neither of you are dying," Courtney persisted, although the words were truly only directed at Suki. She wasn't going to let her die and be eaten. Courtney was going to protect her girlfriend no matter what, even if it meant having to sacrifice one of their own.

                                                                 "No, Misty. I never meant... I didn't want this. How could you two let them -?" Lottie harshly began to ask, sitting up further as she glared at Misty.

                                                                 "How could we?" Misty quickly cut her off, her demeanor changing from nervous to angry, almost offended even at Lottie's response. "You and Suki both started this. It's done and it's going to save all of our lives. So you better not start making people feel bad about it now."

                                                                "You fucking psycho," Suki spat, earning a glare from Misty.

                                                                "You'll see. This was the right choice. I did this for you," Courtney persisted, reaching out for Suki's hand. But Suki pulled away from her.

                                                                "I never asked for this," Suki argued.

                                                                "Come on. We should go," Misty replied, gently tugging on Courtney's sleeve to get her attention.

                                                                  Courtney scowls but gets up anyway, the two girls making their way back downstairs to talk to the others. It was just Lottie and Suki now, the latter grabbing a hold of the group appointed prophet and hugging her close. 

                                                                  "I - I didn't want this. I never wanted this. I just -," Lottie replies, her voice growing shaky as though she were about to cry.

                                                                  "I know. I know," is all Suki says as she continued to hold her close.

                                                                 "What am I supposed to do? I can't do this anymore. I can't keep going like this," Lottie continued. "I don't want to be their leader anymore, Suki. I don't want to do what the wilderness wants. Maybe you were right to question It. Maybe It isn't as good as I thought It was going to be."

                                                                   Suki frowns, glancing down at Lottie. Although she was glad that Lottie was finally able to see what she did, that didn't mean things would be easy. The other girls needed a leader. Someone to rely on and worship, someone to blame when things went wrong. If there was no one, they'd have no choice but to look at themselves and it was pretty obvious that they didn't want to blame themselves for what they did.

                                                                  "I think I have an idea of what to do," Suki replied.

                                                                  "You do?" Lottie glances up at her, looking just a little more hopeful than before. "What is it?"

(🌲🔪🦌)

                                                                   "You should be ashamed," Travis remarked, glaring right at Van and Courtney who were sitting across from him in the room.

                                                                     Courtney scoffs, struggling to feel all the shame she knew she was supposed to feel. All Courtney felt in that moment was hunger and... annoyance over the fact that Suki chose not to see things her way. How could she not see how much she loved her? How could she not see that she'd do anything for her, even down to killing for her?

                                                                   "Well, I don't," Van bluntly admits, devoid of any shame. She seemed almost proud of what she and the others had done and for that, she certainly earned Courtney's respect.

                                                                   "Besides, when you think about it, it's all your fault," Courtney remarked, making Travis scowl. "If you hadn't rushed to save Natalie and just let us finish, she'd be dead and your brother would be just fine.  You and I both know it's true."

                                                                   "You're a monster," Travis replies, his tone dripping with disgust, "The fact that you can even say that -."

                                                                   "I'm not ashamed, Travis. I'm glad I'm alive. Just like you are," Van argued.

                                                                    Travis goes silent as he looks down to the floor, nothing but guilt written on his face.

                                                                   "I don't think any of us who are still here should feel ashamed of that. Ever," Van continued. "Let your brother save you, Travis. After everything he went through out here... don't you at least owe him that?"

                                                                    Once again, Travis didn't know what to say. And so he didn't say anything. Courtney was relieved at that. She wasn't sure just how much more whining from Travis she had to hear.

                                                                    Courtney wasn't sure how much more time would pass before Shauna came back with the tray of meat, all of it coming from Javi himself. All Courtney could fosuc on was the bloodstained meat as she walked to the table, setting the tray down after. She noticed Javi's heart at the very center of the tray and Shauna tenderly grabbed a hold of it, looking down at the bleeding heart before she accidentally met Courtney's gaze. Eyes red with desire and hunger, she motioned for Shauna to continue.

                                                                  She was starving and she wasn't sure how much longer she could wait to eat.

                                                                 "Travis," Shauna declared, looking over at Travis who had been standing off to the side.

                                                                   A scowling Travis quickly made his way towards the fireplace and put the wolf carving on top of the fireplace. After he did that, he walked straight towards Shauna where he looked down at Javi's heart now in her hands before he took it from Shauna. Everyone watched him in anticipation, waiting eagerly for his next move. Courtney watched on as he lifted the heart right up to his lips, taking a bite and consuming a raw piece of Javi for himself.

                                                                 Travis looked absolutely guilty as he then placed the bitten heart back down, Javi's blood smearing his lips, and it went into the pan. The unmistakble sound of meat sizzling on the pan quickly filled the cabin. Travis turned away and stormed out of the window, unable to bring himself to eat his own brother.

                                                                After that, Courtney and the others quickly raced over to the meat and grabbed pieces to add to the pan in preparation to cook. The smell was more than enough for Courtney and she couldn't wait to eat. Finally, their hunger pains would be over and while it wouldn't last forever, it'd be long enough until next time.

(🌲🔪🦌)

word count: 2013
notes: courtney truly gives no fucks lmaoo