Outside she was sunshine-personified

Inside her was darkness that could blind

Could you tell

She was going through hell?

Tears that she fought against 

Sometimes fell without her consent

Did you see

Her crippling misery?

Hope that she kept alive against all odds

Died and so ended a facade

Did you sense

The death of her innocence?

Love that burned in her heart

Charred her hard, tore her apart

Did you know

She's merely a ghost now?

Hope she harbored in her soul

Died slowly as she lost control

Did you notice

The start of her psychosis?

All her hard work down the drain

Life stood still; she missed the train

Did you see her

Standing in your rearview mirror?

Dream that kept her going

Leached the life from her process of growing

Did you notice what was amiss?

Or were you too lost in your own bliss?

Dark thoughts haunt her mind

She's losing patience, all kind

Do you see her still on her feet

Even with her face etched with defeat?

Her soul is tired and it is weary

She's lost all faith in everything cheery

Do you know any way

To make her believe in the light again?

She fought it all, endured the pain

Gave her all, but didn't earn any gain

Do you see her sitting there

Trying so fucking hard not to care?

Her chest feels empty, so does life

Her dream asked for too great a price

Do you know she craves an end?

She's tired of trying and failing to transcend 

Her standards rose and fell

Now all she wants is an out of this hell

Do you know

Which way she should go?

All she ever wished was to be happy

She never thought it would be this dark and crappy

Did you know she feels broken beyond repair?

Shies away from all feeling and consorts with despair

She deserved so much more

Than what life chose to pour

Do you know when she stopped being strong?

Do you know where she went wrong?

'Cuz she would like to know

How everything went all rogue.

-Vaish
(23/9/23)

(Posting on: 4/10/23)

* * *

A/N: let's just say life isn't going the way I planned it to go. At all (what's new? lol). I am getting fucked from all aspects of my life: personal, career and every other. And after doing everything (I thought was) right, I really don't know how, when, and where tf things went so downhill. I'm tired and defeated and just want to leave it all, but that is not an option. Never really was tbh.

And so I wrote this. To cope.

Basically, the poem is self-explanatory.

Hope you guys are doing well. Take care <3