This is kind of my rant for the day. It's actually personal, but I also want to get it out there. Please don't judge.
-------------------------------------------------------------

From excitement to indifference at your arrival,
I learnt to not pack up my mess and hate the time when you shall return.

From appreciation for good marks to taken for granted ranks,
I decided it was no longer important to score good marks.

For disappointed looks to taking away my phone and books,
I wished you wouldn't control me with what I love to do.

From 'Go, study dear, do the work later' to 'Do your work now, I don't care if you fail!'
I learnt how to silently scream in frsustration at your bipolar expectations.

From teasing me for being lazy  to labelling me as lazy,
I learnt to live up to the word if that was what you expected me to do.

From scraped knees to bruised egos,
I learnt that physical wounds heal, while verbal ones only pile up.

From teaching religious rituals to forcing superstitious practices,
I learnt to sneak behind your back.

From small disagreements on flavours of icecream to family conflicts for my behaviour,
I was told that I was always the cause for all conflicts in the house.

From guilty apologies to forced apologies,
I was taught that you will always be right.

From weekly visits to the garden to weekly scoldings for my behaviour,
I learnt to dread the day you are at home.

From 'The ghost will get you!' to 'Your in-laws will kick you out!'
I learnt to silently wish I would never have to marry.

From what I score to what I earn,
I never learnt to value what I truly wanted to do.

From your expectations to my disappointments,
I learnt what I wanted to do was so different from what I should do.

From 'Can I go please?' to 'Why can't I go?!'
I protested against your opposition to my wishes.

From mischevious yet innocent looks to frustrated and angry glares,
I learnt not to not talk back you, simply not speak when being scolded.

From your unbreakable trust to your unwarranted suspicion,
I learnt to hide things from you.

From crying outbursts to silent tears,
I learnt to let out my frustations.

From goodnight kisses and 'Go to sleep now.'
I learnt to miss that little sign of my love for you.

From always dad to sometimes father,
I learnt how much I missed the old you.

From silently loving you to silently cursing you,
I grew up.
And so did the distance between us.

And yet, I love you, Dad.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

  Don't get me wrong here, he is still such an awesome dad all the time and I love him to the moon and back, yet I miss the old him while being grateful for having him as my dad, you know...well, never mind. Thanks for reading.