CHAPTER SIX.

Elly hadn't left her room that morning. She didn't want to. Part of her knew that her raising her voice at Ahsoka was fine and it was just a minor hitch but it scared her. If she could get angry at one of her closest friends, she had no chance of completely controlling herself. She knew that she should talk to Obi-Wan but it suddenly felt so difficult.

But she heard a knock at the door and knew she couldn't hide forever. She called for them to come in and the door whooshed open to reveal Obi-Wan. He had a neutral expression on his face but she could feel the confusion just below the surface. She pulled her robes tighter around her as she looked up at him, giving him a small smile.

"Good morning, Master Kenobi," She said, trying to be as polite as possible. Obi-Wan looked down at her, his eyebrows furrowed together. She was dressed as if she was ready to go out and train and yet she was here.

"Are you ready?" He asked as he put his hands in the pockets of his robes. Elly hesitated before she nodded her head. Obi-Wan then gestured towards the door and Elly pushed herself off the bed. She stopped before she reached the door but when Obi-Wan looked back at her, she forced herself to keep walking.

But the silence became deafening and by the time they reached the training room, the anxious pit in her stomach had grown significantly. She didn't want to stop but Obi-Wan could tell something was wrong. He would just rather that they be in a private place to talk about whatever was clearly bothering the woman.

"I cannot continue this training," Elly said as the door whooshed shut behind them in the training room. Little did she know that Mace Windu caught her words before the door closed and he would be having words of his own with her about that later. Obi-Wan's face fell slightly and she ran her fingers through her hair before she walked over to the bench. She sat down and Obi-Wan joined her side. His robe folded over his lap.

"Elly, I feel like I don't have to remind you what the council will do if you don't continue," He retorted. Elly nodded and shuffled further back so she could cross her legs in front of her. She was messing with her fingers before she turned her head to look at him.

"I can't spar. You saw what it did to me," She retorted. He nodded and let his own head fall back against the wall. They both knew it was inevitable that it would end this way but it didn't make it any easier. They had no other choice but to go forward. The Council didn't know about Elly and they both knew that the Council could never know. They had to do this for themselves.

"We'll suspend any sparring and focus on meditation instead." There was no room for argument in that so Elly nodded. Obi-Wan then stood up and placed his robes on the bench. They still had to go through their typical routine. All training outside of sparring would still be suitable but Elly knew she couldn't spar. Not yet. Especially not with Obi-Wan.

He was one of the few people who had seen what she became after the death of her Padawan and she refused to force him to see that anymore. She didn't want him to have to deal with the guilt of hiding her secrets. He was already doing too much for her. He was a council member and Elly knew deep down that she was no longer suited for the Jedi Order but Obi-Wan had kept her here and she owed it to him to try.

Which is why she pushed herself to her limits, knowing that now was one of her few chances to redeem herself. By the time they were done with the physical workouts, she was red in the face and her chest was heaving. Her head hurt from dehydration and her throat felt sore from breathing so heavily. She was lying on the mats in the middle of the room when Obi-Wan came over with a cantina of water. He dropped it next to her and she forced herself to sit up, guzzling the water down before letting out a sigh of relief.

"We will meditate in here to avoid any suspicion," He informed as he sat down across from her. Elly nodded her head and then pulled the hair tie from her ponytail, her hair falling into a messy middle parting.

The room was quiet as Obi-Wan closed his eyes. He had always found meditation so much easier compared to Elly. Despite her three years of practice, she always found herself restless before starting. Her whole body shifted in an attempt to get comfortable before she closed her eyes. She took a few centring breaths and let her shoulders relax.

It surprisingly didn't take long for her to fall into meditation. The presence of Obi-Wan's force signature seemed to calm her down significantly and the Force flowed through her with ease. It felt strange but Elly stayed calm, knowing that reacting harshly would break the connection and she would have to start all over again.

Then she began the slow process of filtering through her emotions, it was the hardest part. Elly knew she had to be honest with herself about her emotions but it had grown more and more difficult over the years. Between confusing Jedi practices and her own emotional turmoil left by the death of her Padawan and her younger self's feelings, it was hard to admit she wasn't perfect. Especially when Obi-Wan sat across from her.

But she pushed forward. She let the emotions bubble to the surface. The sadness, the anger, the guilt and concern. The emotions she knew she shouldn't feel. She let them go and she felt lighter. Everything felt better.

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After her training session with Obi-Wan that morning, Elly felt better. A little better. Her mind felt less cluttered and for the first time in a long time, meditation had worked properly. The emotions had been absorbed by the Force and she felt at peace. She knew that the emotions would come back eventually, they always did but for now, it was peaceful.

Her front was pressed against her mattress as she let her eyes close. Her muscles ached after the circuit training and although she knew she had to go to the Meditation Gardens, she didn't want to. She was too tired. A yawn escaped her lips as she covered her hand with her mouth. However, her half-nap was disrupted by a knock.

The knock was too hard to be Obi-Wan but in the wrong place to be Master Yoda. Ahsoka only ever half-knocked and she could usually feel Anakin's presence if it was him. Which left one person, Mace Windu. Those nervous feelings quickly bubbled back to the surface but she pushed them back before they had a chance to fester.

She slid off the bed and pottered to the door. Her legs felt a lot sorer than she had expected. She opened the door and plastered the stoic expression that most Jedi seemed to wear onto her face as she was greeted by the tall Jedi Master.

"Master Windu, I wasn't expecting you," She said, a slightly questioning tone as she raised an eyebrow. He walked past her, knocking shoulders with her briefly. She glanced down at the floor for a moment before she waved her hand in front of the sensor to close the door. She then turned to face him, letting her hands rest by her side.

Windu was standing in the middle of her room. He looked so out of place. He had never been a naturalistic person and now the plants surrounded him, he seemed incredibly uncomfortable. Elly could only imagine he was so uncomfortable because his room was as bland as his personality.

"I thought it be best if we discuss some matters in private," He responded as he looked down at her. There was no concern evident though there were hints of disappointment. Her head tilted slightly as she stepped forward.

"What matters?" She asked. It is unlikely that Obi-Wan would have gone out of his way to inform Windu of what had occurred earlier. It came with too much confusion and explanation and it would only lead to more questions. So, it couldn't be about that. Anyone who would have walked past the room should have assumed they were sparring. There was nothing to indicate otherwise

"I overheard your conversation with Master Kenobi at training this morning and I wanted to discuss what was said," Windu explained as he stared her down. His gaze was burning into her head. She felt like she was under interrogation and his words made her pause. Every single possible thing he could have heard running through her head.

"I can assure you that whatever you heard is not what I meant," Elly spoke without thinking, knowing that even a hint of hesitation would be taken as some sort of admittance of guilt. She had done very little wrong, she knew that

"I heard you claim that you cannot continue training? Did you say those words?" He asked. He sounded almost offended by her accusation. She put her hands in the pockets of her robe and straightened up her posture.

"I did," She nodded in conjunction with her words. She knew that she had to at least appear confident. Mace Windu was good at picking apart people and she couldn't allow him to do that.

"And do you not mean what you say?" He accused. Elly's eyebrows pulled together and she stepped back, glancing away from him for a moment.

"Of course I do," She retorted. Her voice was calm and even despite the want to snap at him bubbling to the surface. Not only was Windu interrogating her despite her doing nothing wrong, he was also directly questioning her integrity. She understood that he was doing it on purpose but it frustrated her all the same.

"Then you mean to discontinue your training against the direct orders of the Council?" She shook her head solemnly.

"No." It was a simple answer. Blunt and unquestionable. She knew that Windu was trying to pick her apart but she wouldn't let him. Not here and not because of this. There were plenty of things she deserved to be questioned over but not this.

"Because if that is the case, Master Muloa, then the Council will have little choice but to expel you from the Order." His voice was so calm but the threat wasn't even subtle. Elly stared at him, her face falling. She was completely baffled but his face remained entirely neutral. It quickly made her wonder if the Council had said this or Windu simply wanted to have some sort of power over her. Some form of 'encouragement'.

"I fully intend to continue with training under the Council's Orders," Elly responded, meeting his gaze defiantly. He narrowed his eyes but she held his gaze, unwilling to be intimidated by him of all people.

"Then what were you speaking to Master Kenobi about?" He asked, breaking their gaze first. It was a small inner victory that made Elly smile to herself.

"I was expressing my doubts about whether I have the ability to continue with the training regiment he had created. I didn't mean to prevent all further training," She explained. It was a lie. All of it was a complete lie but she said it with enough confidence that he seemed to believe her. She just hoped that she could speak to Obi-Wan before Windu got the chance.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"Yes. I did not intend for it to come across that way to passersby. I do not intend to disobey the Council's orders." Elly put up her most confident smile and Windu seemed to take her at face value which is exactly what she needed. She let her shoulders relax when he seemed to take the lie. It was just what she needed.

"And if I asked Master Kenobi about this incident, he would tell me what you have." He was still trying to catch her out but Elly wouldn't let it pass. She nodded.

"Yes."

"The Council is putting a lot of faith in you and we are relying on this training to be completed in a timely manner," Windu said as he walked towards the door. Elly turned around, watching him walk away. He glanced back at her and she forced a neutral smile onto her face.

"And it will be." She assured. That was a lie. She wasn't sure what would happen but she knew that she had to try.

"Good." He responded and then he opened the door with a wave of his hand and left her alone. Elly felt like she could breathe again and let out a soft sigh. She ran her fingers through her hair before she walked back to her bed and collapsed against it. Her face hit the pillows with a soft 'oof'. She was lucky that time. Next time she might not be.

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