5. Sludge
When do i get to claim my badge as Present Mic's number one simp?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sticking with the family chat, keigo is here because he definitely lives under Enji's floorboards with Rumi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~A wild name guide~~
• Oboro Shirakumo - Loud Cloud
• Nemuri Kayama - Midnight
• Tensei Iida - Ingenium
• Tsunagu Hakamata - Best Jeanist
• Shota Aizawa - Eraserhead
• Anakuro Hirooki - Thirteen
• Hizashi Yamada - Present mic
• Yagi Toshinori - All might
• Enji Todoroki - Endeavour
• Rumi Usagiyama - Miruko
• Keigo Takami - Hawks
• Yu Takeyama - Mt Lady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thursday 7th April
wHeN i wAs a yOunG bOy
~[16 : 43]~
Keigo Takami:
I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BEING A MEME
Yu Takeyama:
Why tho? Any publicity is good publicity
Shota Aizawa:
Last time i checked, being convicted of mass murder is the not so good type of publicity.
Yu Takeyama:
Well damn. I stand corrected.
Nemuri Kayama:
You're literally sat on the sofa watching cheesy reality shows.
Yu Takeyama:
I - s i t - c o r r e c t e d
Yu Takeyama:
Also i just debuted tHis mOrnIng. I deserve some me time before i have to go on patrol again later.
Keigo Takami:
NO YOU DON'T GET IT. I'M NO LONGER KNOWN AS HAWKS THE HERO
Keigo Takami:
NOOO I'M THE APPLE JUICE GUY FROM THAT ONE VIDEO NOW.
Enji Todoroki:
Not that fucking video, jesus fucking christ.
Yagi Toshinori:
Which apple juice video? The one where you you spilt some on Enji at the hero charts or the one where you inhaled it through the nose and it came out your ears?
Tsunagu Hakamata:
The fact theres more than one apple juice video really solidifies the fact you're The Apple Juice Guy.
Rumi Usagiyama changed Keigo Takami's name to Apple Juice Guy
Apple Juice Guy:
NO STOP. I'VE BEEN CRYING INTO A MCDONALDS HAPPY MEAL FOR THREE HOURS. MY NUGGETS ARE COLD. C O L D .
Hitoshi Shinso:
Did you happen to order some apple juice with that happy meal?
Apple Juice Guy:
GO BACK TO SCHOOL BEFORE I THROTTLE YOU
Izuku Midoriya:
That would be child abuse Hawks, how does 'Convicted Abuser Apple Juice Guy' sound to you?
Tenko Shimura:
Or you could join the League? Please i just want one hero to be a backstabber. Think of the drama Keigo.
Apple Juice Guy:
LEAVW ME ALONE TENKO, I JUST WANT TO SOB INTO MY MCDONALDS IN PEACE 😭😭😭
Anakuro Hirooki:
If it makes you feel better Keigo, at least the general populace hasn't dubbed you the 'hotter than hot hobo'
Shota Aizawa:
Please don't bring that up, its incredibly embarrassing.
Rumi Usagiyama:
Ya but 'hotter than hot hobo' is better than 'that random apple juice guy' by a whole ass miLe.
Shoto Todoroki:
It reminds me of the time everyone in kindergarten called Katsuki the 'broccoli butt sniffer' because he accidentallyyyy–
Tenya Iida:
I apologize for this unbefitting behavior. Shoto will not be on his phone during lesson time anymore.
Oboro Shirakumo:
NO SHOTO FUNISH THE STORY. I NEE D IT
Izuku Midoriya:
He thought it would be funny to pants me during recess but apparently everyone thought it was pretty gæ
Yuga Aoyama:
Because it was mon ami ✨🥰
Katsuki Bakugo:
SHUT THE FUCK UP DEKU. AT LEAST I WASN'T KNOWN AS DOOKY PANTS THE 3RD
Hitoshi Shinso:
Not because you were dooky pants the 2nd 👀
Tenya Iida:
At least we can all agree Shoto was the first. Apologies, we shall be continuing with our studies now.
Enji Todoroki:
I would like a refund on my youngest child please.
Touya Todoroki:
Hehe nerds. The real dooky pants the first was me, they got the wrong Todoroki.
Enji Todoroki:
And the oldest child.
Tsunagu Hakamata:
Can we please return to the fact people are calling Shota 'Musutafu's hottest hobo?'
Yagi Toshinori:
I thought he was the '''hotter than hot hobo'''?
Yu Takeyama:
People call him alot of things. I heard he was the 'hobo in the streets, devil in the sheets'. The other day lmao
Oboro Shirakumo:
Hizashi? Can you confirm?
Hizashi Yamada:
WHAT? PLEASE I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF A PRESS INTERVIEW AND YOUR MAKING ME 🅱️LUSH
Tsunagu Hakamata:
Thats a Yessir.
Shota Aizawa left the group
Tensei Iida:
Understandable have a magnificent day
Nemuri Kayama:
Now that he's gone i can tell you something fun. Someone made a GoFundMe to: "Get the hobo off the streets and into a castle where he belongs."
Anakuro Hirooki:
NO WAY THATS TRUE 😭💀
Yu Takeyama:
The person who set it up had the alias 'loud blonde' 👀
Tsunagu Hakamata:
Ah Hizashi. Are wanting a castle too?
Hizashi Yamada:
NO THERES SO MANY LOUD BLONDES ABOUT. KATSUKI IS A LOUD BLONDE.
Tensei Iida:
No, Katsuki is an aggressive blonde, its okay Hizashi we understand.
Hizashi Yamada:
Hahzgqbqnjjq STOOOOP
Hitoshi Shinso:
Schools out, someone tell dad i will not be eating his piss poor attempt at homemade pizza again.
Shoto Todoroki:
I thought it was nice, if you got over the sourness. The aftertaste reminded me of when i used to eat acorns.
Oboro Shirakumo:
You're lucky he left the chat because he would've definitely stuffed you both in the crust of his ""pizza""
Katsuki Bakugo:
DEKU WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GO? I JUST WANNA TALK.
Izuku Midoriya:
For you "talk" means breaking both my legs so i left school early :)
Yagi Toshinori:
IZUKU WHAT RVER YOU DO PLEASE DON'T TAKE THE SUBWAY
Izuku Midoriya:
Its a bit late for that All Dad, why?
Izuku Midoriya:
Oh, i see
Izuku Midoriya:
Well shiiit
Shoto Todoroki:
are you okay?
Katsuki Bakugo:
DEKU WHAT THE FUCK
Shoto Todoroki:
Izuku
Shoto Todoroki:
Izuku
Shoto Todoroki:
Izuku
Shoto Todoroki:
Izuuuuuuukuuuuuu
Shoto Todoroki:
I z u k u
Shoto Todoroki:
I love you?
Shoto Todoroki:
Are you ok
Shoto Todoroki:
I have your mints still
Shoto Todoroki:
I should give them back
Shoto Todoroki:
Katsuki keeps annoying me.
Shoto Todoroki:
I need you to pierce his ears again
Shoto Todoroki:
Please answer
Yu Takeyama:
The fucking simp level is off the charts
Izuku Midoriya:
THAT WAS THE MOST EVENTFUL 10 MINUTES OF MY ENTIRE LIFE
Izuku Midoriya:
Also hi shoto, ill be home soon :3
Shoto Todoroki:
hello :)
Anakuro Hirooki:
What the fuck did i just read? I need context
Izuku Midoriya:
And context you shall receive. I was in the subway when this big ole slime guy came out of the sewers like a rat and tried to enter me.
Tensei Iida:
👁👄👁
Hizashi Yamada:
OMG ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU TRAUMATIZED
Hitoshi Shinso:
Someone needs to tell this guy the slime trend died in 2017
Izuku Midoriya:
Ikr lol. What a loser. Anyway, All Dad came and punched his lights out like a great dad, he was in a rush for some reason but i needed to ask him something so i held onto his thicc leg and fLeW.
Nemuri Kayama:
Aww you used to do that all the time when you were younger.
Izuku Midoriya:
Right? So we landed on a roof, i asked my important question: If we could order takeout tonight. Then he shared a shocking secret with me and took off, with the slime in some soda bottles because practical.
Rumi Usagiyama:
Where are you now squirt?
Izuku Midoriya:
Wandering through the streets, slightly lost, slightly scared. Can you pick me up Auntie Rumi :^)
Yagi Toshinori:
I DROPPED IT OH SHIT OH FUCK
Izuku Midoriya:
IM SORRY WHAT? YOU DID NOT JUST DROP THE VILLIAN
Tenko Shimura:
Im ashamed to be called your brother smh
Hizashi Yamada:
AND YOU SHOUTED AT ME FOR DROPPING THE KIDNEY
Yagi Toshinori:
THAT WAS LITERAL YEARS AGO. NEXT CALLER
Hitoshi Shinso:
I FEEL LIKE THERE'S SOME BACKSTORY HERE I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT
Tensei Iida:
YOU WILL NOT KNOW. E V E R
Oboro Shirakumo:
WHY IS EVERYONE YELLING
Katsuki Bakugo:
I FUCKING FOUND YOUEPR SHITTY VILLIAN. ITS FUCKING DESCENDING UPON ME. FUCKING
Apple Juice Guy:
The sad thing? He could've properly finished his SOS message if he didn't cuss after every word 😢✊
Yu Takeyama:
NOT THE TIME FEATHER BRAINS, TOSHINORI I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR GORGEOUS ASS OVER I HERE I WILL ✨MANIFEST✨
Hitoshi Shinso:
Why is nobody doing anything? Katsuki might actually diE lmao
Izuku Midoriya:
OH FUCK THIS
Shoto Todoroki:
I get the feeling you did something stupid
Hitoshi Shinso:
HAHA YES IZUKU POP THE FUCK OFF! LET ME HELP
Yu Takeyama:
Damn. Look at these quirky lil kids, running right to death. Just damn damn.
Yagi Toshinori:
N O . IM LOSING IT. STOP I CAN'T GOODBYE. GYVTYVYTVYTV
Touya Todoroki:
What the fuck is happening over there? And why do i have to be at the mall with my family instead of joining in.
Shoto Todoroki:
Yeah, im worried about Izuku
Enji Todoroki:
Hush my dear children. We do not mix with the 3rd class.
Yu Takeyama:
FUCK YOU ENJI, ILL MUG U
Katsuki Bakugo:
UNCLE TOSHINORI YOU NIGHTMARE, I DIDN'T BRING A JACKET. AND YOU MAKE IT RAIN? DAMN IT IM FUCKING SOAKED.
Hitoshi Shinso:
Imagine missing out on that entertaining shit show.
Anakuro Hirooki:
IM SO ANGRY I WASN'T THERE
Oboro Shirakumo:
I had to teach a lesson and i‐ what happened
Yu Takeyama:
Because that was such a stressful situation, i say we have family night at the Todoroki's~
Apple Juice Guy:
Ill text the rest of the class
Enji Todoroki:
STOP DOING THIS YU
~
Rumi Usagiyama:
Its been a while, Where's Izu and Toshi?
Katsuki Bakugo:
Damn nerd probably fell down a ditch
Oboro Shirakumo:
And Toshi probably followed tbf
Nemuri Kayama:
Lmaoo true
Apple Juice Guy:
Can we play monopoly
~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~
Elsewhere in Musutafu...
"Izuku, you will be a hero." Toshinori smiled brightly and Izuku Midoriya allowed himself to believe his number one hero.
~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~
Vttvtvyb ok that ending was lowkey cute.
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