▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁
⊱ 𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐬 ⊰
𝙖 𝙘𝙧𝙤𝙨𝙨𝙧𝙤𝙖𝙙𝙨
▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁
⠀
⠀

there comes a time in life when decisions are made based on necessity rather than desire, what a person may truly want or prefer is cast to the side when the need for things becomes much greater — this is why people take college classes too stressful since the credit looks good, why smiling and nodding at thanksgiving dinner is forced because opinions start arguments, and why people work for companies they hate since the pay is good and they need to put that food on the table.

he had no table to put food on, he had no thanksgiving dinners to sit at, and he certainly had no college classes to take to ruin his mood some more. sometimes decisions were made purely to get away from it all. the need for space and time to think was also a necessity, keeping humans from completely losing their minds and giving them one more day to feel like they were still sane.

that was the true need. jungkook couldn't lose it, not just yet at least. there was so much to do it seemed before things would end, before the light went away and there were no more days. somehow he would need to find things to do to fill those days before the need to shorten them becomes too much.

six months ago he'd never picture himself where he was today, meeting one of seoul's most well known entertainers with a reputation and name that could get him anything his little heart desires. this was probably the last place he'd ever want himself to be found. jungkook didn't think he'd find himself hauling makeup trunks and suitcases stuffed with stage outfits out to a hallway of a building where the paint on the walls cost more than what he'd consider spending on groceries nowadays.

he wasn't broke, or even close for that matter. jungkook never really struggled, not as a child or through school years since he had good parents with decent jobs that kept them okay. he just didn't find the need to waste money on things that didn't matter as much as the fancy brand of water stocking the mini fridges in every office room.

it wasn't his money, it didn't matter. he'd stay quiet and do his job to earn his check and then find another when this was all over. that's all the ravenette has been doing the last six months, hopping from one place to the next to like a child that couldn't sit still.

no one would know he was so antsy to keep busy based of that stoic expression sitting happy on his face most of the time and the rest of his calm exterior. no one but her.

"so what do you think?" ms. euna hadn't left yet. she was packed and had her bag full of hair dryers and paintings from her kids, but she still stood in the hallway of the entertainment building, like someone had to remove her before she willingly left so soon.

jungkook stopped organizing the bags and trunks neatly against the wall so they were out of the way, hearing the pop in his knees as he stood up straight. "what do i think?" he said.

"about the boy," she smiled so warmly, so naturally. "taehyung is a sweetheart." she said. the look in her eyes and the sincerity in her voice when she spoke about him only showed how she did really care. this wasn't just a job for her, and he felt a little guilty for showing up and looking at everything strictly business. euna didn't fail to tell him everything, gushing about the young rockstar and how he never sits still unless she had some snack sitting there or showed pictures of her kids from her phone, the way they were all a family from the stage crew to the members in the band.

jungkook felt like an outsider already, like a square block being shoved into a family of circles and he knew it just wouldn't work. he didn't want it, but leaving seoul for many months and being busy was the only thing he really craved right now. "do you really want to know what i think?" he asked, but it wasn't really a question to be answered.

ms. euna just hummed, instead of sigh that really wanted to escape her lungs. she helped the male get his job, an old family friend she was that got in touch over not the best circumstances. jungkook was both thankful and despised it, he couldn't help but feel both when talking to the lady — just to be reminded by that time but also saved from sitting alone and always thinking about it.

"if you need anything, give me a call." she said, that same warm smile on her face, little wrinkles showing at the eyes from age, as well as that subtle hint of sadness that was in every pair looking at him. that's exactly what he was running from, why he was leaving seoul.

jungkook would rather have a spoiled rockstar look at him with no second glances instead of the pity in everyone else's. it only left a lump in his chest, one that traveled down from his throat and settled in his stomach to remind his to press on the gas harder to get home quicker. time didn't work like that, trying to speed things up gets people to places quicker, but the time spent there is so much longer.

after leaving the entertainment building and driving home, jungkook dropped his bag on the floor next to the door where he left his shoes as well. it was dark and empty, cold from the window he stupidly left open all morning for the wind to enter and make itself comfy until greeting him later on. it was getting dark out, nearing dinner time and soon bed time.

he opened the fridge and pulled out some leftovers from the day before, a carton of rice and another with noodles and vegetables. there was no chance in him cooking tonight, not when he's been up since the sun said hello this morning, rising over the horizon just as he was getting the building to start his tour around the place and catch up with euna. they all got folders at the meeting last night, filled with timetables and schedules that practically planned out the next five months.

that's how jungkook liked it, he knew what he'd be doing and where he'd be and how he can fill those few spaces of free time to keep his mind busy and running. later he'd probably go through the folder again, and then again tomorrow and most likely another time before the end of the week. for right now he dumped his dinner all onto one plate before sticking it in the microwave and deciding to change before the timer ended.

that attire usually consisted of sweatpants and a simple shirt, anything comfortable and clean that he could find before laundry day on saturdays. the smell of his food had him walking back out to the kitchen, taking the plate carefully and some chopsticks before sitting at the small table by a window in his apartment.

six months ago he moved here, selling his house and finding some place smaller. there was no reason to live in a place too big for one person, not when his apartment now was doing him just fine.

jungkook had two chairs at his kitchen table, he'd probably only have one since that's all he needed, but it looked funny sitting there on it's own so he was quick to buy a new one to put on the other end. he stared at it now while he ate, cheeks full of noodles and steamed vegetables. empty chairs were meant to be filled, maybe he would go back to just having the one.

it was such a different approach to life than others, some wanting more things to fill what they didn't have. much like a young brunette, silky robe over his shoulders and glass of beige waves in his hand once again. taehyung looked out his apartment window, the skyline shining with lights from all the buildings below him and looking the pixies trapped in his glass. they were free, outside in the real world to do what they wanted and touch the sky if they really wanted to, to get lost in that darkness and never come back down to this earth.

he never ate at his kitchen table, not the long marbled one with six chairs on each side or even dark oak one on the other side of the kitchen island. he remembers not being able to choose which he liked more, but the space in his home let him get both. taehyung figured it wouldn't hurt to fill that space.

most of the time he spent on his couch, or in his room with a movie in the background and his hand playing with himself to keep him company — but most of the time taehyung sat by the windows, all tall and on every side to give the best view of the city. he'd sit and stare, drink in hand until the bottle was empty and he was too lost to find another. the sun coming up would tell him to go to bed, to get a couple hours of sleep before someone needed him.

he slept a lot, not too many people really needed him. they needed his talent.

taehyung sipped his champagne and hummed to the song playing through the apartment, something with no lyrics and just sounds, much different than the music he writes himself. this was his safe place, a sanctuary to relax and not be bothered.

the stage was his home. where the true taehyung came out and he left nothing out when belting words and leaving it all there with those ready to pay to see him. he loved the attention, and he'd partly do shows for free just so he could sing and be appreciated by someone. but he needed the money to buy more champagne and more kitchen tables.

anything to fill the empty space.

⠀
⠀
⠀
⠀
⠀
⠀
⠀
⠀
⠀
▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁

let me know what you think so far!
i'm curious and i'm kind of taking a slightly different approach to writing this story so i'm wondering what you guys think