It's funny how I always keep running away from all these problems, and now him. But I know he won't follow.

I was going back home, to cry in my bed and eat strawberry ice cream. To ditch this stupid dress and wash off all the makeup, removong every trace of this night.

To disappear and never come back. I had messed up. I had left him. But how was that possible, when he wanted me in the first place?

The keys jingle inside my pocket, and I dash through the drunk crowds and laughing couples. They were so happy.

I had memorised where the carpark was located, just in case. It was funnily painful, that I prepared to get away fast if he broke my heart.

The traffic lights are tired, blinking slowly but I had to get away, far from here. And then its green and the little man starts to walk, so I do too.

As fast as him, faster until everything is blurry. From my tears, and the city lights that burn into my sight. And for a moment, I close my eyes and imagine to be freed, from all this. From Cole and love and being alive. To feel nothing and everything.

But I wouldn't know.

I can hear the cars rushing to me, closer and closer. I keep my eyes shut and spread out my arms.

And I wonder what it is like to leave forever, without my heart, because Cole has taken it.

I wouldn't know any better than you.