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29: Somewhere Between Hope And Hopelessness

The sun was low in the sky, casting its warm, golden light over the winding road, the kind of light that made everything feel more cinematic than it probably deserved. Nze walked alongside Iza, his bag slung lazily over one shoulder, the faint hum of crickets and the rustling leaves filling the spaces between their words.

Iza kicked a loose pebble on the road, sending it skittering ahead. "So, you're going to see your aunt?"

"Yeah," Nze said, adjusting the strap of his bag. "She's not been feeling great. Figured I'd spend the weekend with family before I drown in revision. You know, do my filial duty or whatever."

Iza snorted, folding her arms across her chest. "Filial duty? Since when did you start sounding like someone out of a 19th-century novel?"

"Since I started hanging out with someone who insists on using words like henceforth in normal conversations," he shot back, grinning.

She rolled her eyes but didn't bother denying it. "Fair. But seriously, are you okay? You've been... I don't know, quieter lately." 

"What do you mean?" Nze asked, kicking a rock down the road, as if the answer might be hiding underneath it. 

"Oh, I don't know," she said, her voice laced with a kind of casualness that was anything but casual. "You're not the quiet type. You're the run-your-mouth-until-it-falls-off type. So, forgive me if I'm a little concerned when you suddenly go all broody." 

"Maybe I just have a lot on my mind," he said, his smirk faltering for just a second. It was so brief, Iza almost missed it. Almost.

"Cryptic," Iza replied, narrowing her eyes. 

Nze laughed, and the sound cut through the air like sunlight breaking through clouds. Iza smiled too, but it hurt. It hurt in that dull, familiar way she was getting used to, the way that lived somewhere between hope and hopelessness. 

She wished he'd let her in—just a crack, just enough for her to peek through the door he kept so firmly shut. She wished he'd see her for more than the person who walked beside him, more than the friend who laughed at his jokes and carried half his burdens without being asked. She wished he'd let her be his, and maybe—if he ever stopped being so completely blind to the obvious—let her make him hers too. 

But Nze didn't see it. Or maybe he saw it and chose not to see it, which hurt worse. She blamed that stupid imprint. It had tethered his heart to the leopard that had marked him. She didn't fully understand it—Nze didn't even know about it—but whatever bond it had created, it was clear it left no room for her.. She had tried—tried so hard—to push past it, to just be his friend, to just be there

And she had been there. For weeks now, she had been everywhere he was, everywhere he'd let her be. Giving him just enough space to breathe but not enough to let him disappear completely. She joked that the only thing she hadn't done was follow him into the bathroom, and honestly, she wasn't above considering it. 

The fact that she was walking him home—through the winding roads of his neighborhood on one side of town—when her home was on the complete other side said it all. But Nze, bless him, had the emotional perception of a rock. 

She sighed and looked over at him, at the way he seemed to carry something invisible but heavy on his shoulders. "You know, you could tell me. Whatever's on your mind, I mean. I'm not great with secrets, but I'm an excellent listener." 

He glanced at her, his smile softer now, almost grateful. "I know, Iza. I know." 

And just like that, the conversation ended, leaving her alone with her unspoken words and the silence that followed him like a shadow.

He looked ahead, where the road curved and disappeared into the dense green of the hill. "I'm fine," he said, too quickly.

Iza raised an eyebrow, her face the perfect mix of skepticism and concern. "You're a terrible liar, you know. The worst. Like, if there were a competition for lying, you'd come in last place. By a lot."

"I'm not lying," Nze said, though his voice betrayed him.

"You are literally lying right now," she countered, her voice light but her gaze sharp. "But if you say you're good, I'd believe you."

He stopped walking, turning to face her. "How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Read my mind like it's the back of a cereal box?"

Iza shrugged, a smug grin spreading across her face. "It's a gift. And also, you're not exactly subtle, Arinze. You've been the easiest-to-read boy at Holy Cross."

Nze laughed genuinely and they started walking again, the road narrowing as the trees closed in around them. Iza was quiet for a moment, her usual quick wit giving way to something more thoughtful.

The road dipped slightly as they walked, the trees forming a canopy overhead. The sunlight filtered through the leaves in patches, casting a soft, dappled glow on the path. Iza, still grinning from Nze's laugh, glanced at him sideways. 

"So, how ready are you for exams?" she asked, kicking another pebble off the path. 

Nze groaned dramatically, tilting his head back as if the thought alone was physically painful. "Let's see... I've gone through approximately two chapters out of twenty for Philosophy, skimmed the handouts for Logic, and stared at my Intro to Literature textbook long enough to realize I'd rather set it on fire than actually read it." 

Iza snorted. "Sounds like you've got a solid plan." 

"Iza, I am drowning," Nze said, throwing his hands in the air. "And Pico's no help—he just keeps telling me to 'relax' and 'study vibes.' Like, what does that even mean?" 

"It means Pico's going to repeat another year," Iza quipped. "But honestly, you'll be fine. You always pull it together at the last minute. It's like your superpower." 

"Yeah, but I'd prefer a superpower that doesn't involve near-death experiences from cramming," Nze said, shaking his head. "What about you? How's the reading going?" 

She shrugged. "Better than you, obviously. Aunt Oby's been drilling me like she's the one sitting for the exams." 

Nze chuckled. "Aunt Oby and her endless questions. 'Iza, how's school?' 'Iza, when is Nze coming to visit again?' She really loves me, you know." 

"She does," Iza said with a smirk. "She thinks you're charming. If only she knew the truth." 

"Hey!" Nze protested, feigning offense. "I am charming." 

"Sure, sure," Iza said, waving him off. "But seriously, when are you visiting again? She keeps asking, and honestly, I'm tired of being the middleman. Just show up so she can gush about how 'respectful and well-mannered' you are." 

"I'll visit after exams," Nze said, grinning. "Assuming I survive." 

"Deal," Iza said, holding out her hand as if to seal the promise. 

They reached the base of the hill, the road now lined with houses and the faint scent of wood smoke wafting in the air. Nze's house came into view—a modest, single-story building with a neatly swept front yard and a small lumber shed at the side.

"Here we are," Nze said, gesturing grandly. "Casa Nduka. No frills, but the lumber shed is a nice touch, don't you think?" 

Iza laughed. "Very classy. Are you sure you don't live in a palace?" 

Before Nze could respond, the door creaked open, and Aunt Naomi stepped out onto the veranda, her face lighting up when she saw them. 

"Arinze!" she called, her voice warm despite its hoarseness. "You're back!" 

"Hey, Aunt Naomi," Nze said, hurrying up the steps to hug her. "I brought company, hope that's okay." 

"Of course, it is," Aunt Naomi said, her eyes twinkling as she looked at Iza. "You must be Izabella with a "Z". Nze talks about you all the time." 

Iza raised an eyebrow, glancing at Nze. "Oh, does he now?" 

Nze groaned, shaking his head. "Don't listen to her. She's just trying to embarrass me." 

"Too late," Iza said, grinning. 

Eli appeared in the doorway then, his muscular frame nearly filling the entrance. "Nze! You brought a guest? Good. We need more people to share this yam porridge Naomi made." 

Iza laughed. "If you're offering food, I might just move in." 

"Be careful what you wish for," Eli said, chuckling. "Come in, come in." 

Inside, the house smelled of spices and freshly cooked food. The small living room was cozy, with mismatched furniture and faded but clean curtains framing the windows. 

Iza sat on the couch, chatting easily with Naomi and Eli while Nze excused himself to put his bag away. The conversation flowed naturally—Naomi asking about Iza's family, Eli cracking jokes about Nze's study habits, and Iza firing back with her own quips. 

After about an hour, Iza glanced at her phone. "I should probably head back before it gets too dark." 

"You sure?" Naomi asked. "You're welcome to stay for dinner." 

"Thanks, Aunt Naomi, but I'll come another time," Iza said, standing. "I have to pretend to study, you know." 

Nze walked her to the door, the two of them stepping outside as the evening air grew cooler. 

"Thanks for coming in," Nze said. "They liked you." 

"I mean, who wouldn't?" Iza said, smirking. Then her tone softened. "You've got a good family, Nze. Don't take them for granted." 

"I won't," he said, smiling. "And hey, thanks for the walk. And the pep talk. And for not letting me wallow in my own weirdness." 

"Anytime," Iza said. She gave him a quick hug before turning to head down the road. "Don't forget—visit Aunt Oby after exams. She'll probably bake something if you do." 

"Got it," Nze called after her. 

He stood there for a moment, watching her until she disappeared around the bend. Then he turned and went back inside, the warmth of home wrapping around him like a well-worn blanket.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚

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