This was the absolute last thing that I should've been doing, but goddammit I couldn't help myself. 

Not when it came to her. 

Her sweet strands of coiled amber hair tickled the edge of my chin as the sunlight poured in through the curtains. 

God, this was so similar but so far away that it made some forgotten part of my chest sting. 

There was a physical ache in my ribs from where this image of her waking up in my arms not too long ago flashed behind my eyes, but then I was pushing her away. 

In the memory, I was telling her things that were supposed to make her stay away from me forever, not come back with information about my mother in a move so selfless it made my fucking head spun. 

In the memory I was betraying her, because I was too much of a coward to tell her to actually stay away from me, to tell her the real reason why. 

It was all too much and not enough, and when push came to shove I chose to keep her safe by hurting her anyway. 

So what did it all matter anyway?

Because the moment I saw her stricken, tear stained face as she staggered down the sidewalk, I knew it didn't matter. 

The only thing that did matter was telling her the truth about why I had acted the way that I did.

And maybe she'd never forgive me for using her family like that, but if it meant keeping her safe I'd sacrifice just about anyone just to make sure she was okay.

And keeping her away from my father, especially knowing the truth about what he'd done to my mother?  That was my top priority. 

It just seemed we couldn't keep away from each other anymore, though.  No matter how hard we tried. 

She was like a magnet and I couldn't resist being pulled into her orbit. 

She shifted a little on my arm and I couldn't help but remember how she'd fallen asleep on my chest the night before as I rocked her gently beside me. 

She hadn't cried anymore. 

No, instead she'd done something much worse. 

She hadn't made a single sound all night. 

The silence scared me more than her fear, than her grief. 

The silence meant that she'd started giving up. 

I wasn't about to let that happen. 

"Ugh, why do I feel like I chugged a bottle of vodka last night?"

"I don't know...did you?  Before you came here, I mean."

She gingerly lifted her head up off my chest and glanced around the room as if taking inventory on if anything had changed since the last time she'd been there. 

"I definitely must've been either drunk or out of my mind to have come here of all places."

I couldn't help but reach up and tuck a stay curl out of her eyes and behind her ear, marveling at just how damn soft her skin was. 

It should've been a crime—no one's skin should be allowed to feel that silky-smooth. 

"Ouch.  You do know your words hurt, right?"

She scrambled up off of me in a half-crawl, half-jump, but before I could ask where the fire was, she was frantically searching for what was most likely her phone. 

"What time is it?"

"Why does it matter?  School's out for the week, no one else is here except two or three guys who stayed back in the house.  We're all alone, sweetheart."

"It matters because I still have an internship that I can't just neglect because of the holidays.  Some people actually need references and resume builders for when they graduate and need to get real jobs.  Some people don't rely on their criminal fathers to—"

She cut herself off. 

It was like watching her brain turn its wheels in real time.  Kind of adorable, really, if you didn't take into account what she thought of me subconsciously.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that.  I know you don't...support him right now.  But in my defense...you did support him when you knew he was doing some really crooked things.  I can understand why you drew the line where you did, but its kind of a too little too late kind of thing.  You knew who he was before, you just didn't know the extent of what he was capable of before I showed you."

I didn't know I was breathing so deeply until my stomach stretched with the force of each inhale. 

"I think you meant it exactly how you said it.  And just to set the record straight here, Gracie, I never supported my father, not once."

She was ruffled in her workout gear from the day before as it seemed like she was going on a run to clear her head before she found me, her hair a mussed mess on the top of her head and her eyes wide with unshed tears, but she was still easily the most beautiful girl I'd ever laid eyes on. 

She deserved the truth because of the way that I cared about her, and because of the way she'd told me she cared about me. 

In this little slice of life, we could escape from everything, from reality, from my father and all his little horrors. 

But she needed to hear the truth first, just once, and it would take everything in me for it to come out, but she was worth it. 

God, was she so worth it. 

"Oh really?  You're trying to tell me that you didn't support your father when you were doing his bidding?  When you were calling my father and trying to blackmail him with bogus jail time for something he had no idea about?  It was my mother who stole from your father, not my dad!  In case you haven't noticed, she left him!  For your father!  God, this is so fucked up..."

Gracie threw her face in her hands, the mass of curls around her falling over until she was just a curtain of hair and anxiety.

"I'm trying to tell you the truth here, Gracie.  Do you want to listen to it?  You might want to take a seat, its a long story."

"The truth?  Oh, that's a good one coming from you!  We were standing right here not too long ago when you told me the truth about why you pursued me!  We were standing right here when you made it clear the only interest you had in me was because of your father and what my mom had stolen from him!"

"It wasn't the whole truth, Gracie."

"Oh?  Please, enlighten me then on this 'whole truth' of yours.  I'm sure it'll be so eye opening."

Swinging my legs off the edge of the bed as the old frame creaked beneath my weight, I stood to my full height but she still somehow managed to look down on me with those glorious eyes of hers.

She had her arms crossed over her chest, but the second I started walking toward her she put them up as if to tell me to not come any closer. 

"Dammit, Gracie, I'm not gonna hurt you.  I just don't think this is the kind of conversation we should be having if we're at each other's throats.  Can I at least make you breakfast?  You've got to be starving.  And you can't make it to your internship without having my famous protein chocolate chip waffles first."

"What are you gonna do, poison them?"

"Only with sugar."

She rolled her eyes, but there was a hint of acceptance of my offer as her eyes danced from the glint of sunlight still streaming in from the early morning. 

"Fine.  One waffle, with extra syrup.  Then I'm leaving.  You can tell me whatever it is you want to tell me while I'm eating."

Then she turned on her heel and was out the door.

***

She sat in silence again while she watched me cook. 

It was unnerving, really, the way I'd turn around to grab an ingredient just to find her staring, quiet, her face never giving off any hint of an expression to give me an insight into what she was thinking. 

It was a miracle she was even still sitting there, entertaining the idea of letting me explain to her what had been going on in my head for practically my entire life. 

It didn't help that we were both so hot and cold with each other. 

I knew why I was acting the way that I was, and I knew why she was pushing me away, but I had no clue why she kept pulling me back in. 

Surely the way I'd treated her would've been enough to send her running?

But no, she'd found me and given me the answers to a question I'd known all along but always had needed proof in order to accept, and she'd done it without wanting anything else in return. 

She'd gone running but had broken down in my arms when she came across me, and she'd let me be the person who rubbed her back all night long until we both fell asleep. 

She was a fucking enigma is what she was.

"And there you go, my famous protein chocolate chip waffles, with extra syrup on the side."

She'd made me put an extra serving of sugar into the batter, so it wasn't like she needed the extra syrup too, but a sweet tooth was another little tidbit about her that I stowed away for later in my mind as facts about her that I'd need to recall at another time. 

She placed her fork on the waffle and began to dig in, which was when I started talking...and only hoped she didn't run away from me when I was finished. 

"I've always known exactly who my father was, and I've had no illusions about the type of man he is.  It's why I was doing his dirty work in the first place—I was pretending, trying to get on his good side.  It was never real, it was just a game with him.  It always has been."

She set her fork down, those expressive eyes glancing over the dirty cooktop, the sticky counters where my teammates scarfed down breakfasts and late lunches. 

Everywhere but me.

"That's pretty convenient.  You were just faking it when you harassed my father for information.  Sure.  And I'm supposed to believe that how?"

There she went, crossing those damn arms in front of her again. 

It was time to stop pulling punches.  If I wanted her to stay and hear the whole story, it was time to pull out the big guns.

"Because the first time my father hit me I was only eight years old, and it only got worse from there."

***

Author's Note:

What did you think of this chapter?

What do you think will happen next?

Question:  Have you read any of my other stories on here?  If so, what are your faves?

Also--there's been some troubling information that a lot of readers have been finding my stories on other platforms.  Please note: this story has only ever been posted on Wattpad! 

I have never posted anywhere other than Wattpad and likely never will post anywhere else, so if you see this story or any of my other books somewhere else, please report them or send me a message and let me know!  

There are others profiting off of my FREE stories and my hard work, and that makes me feel a little bit crushed....so please help if you can, I would appreciate it more than you know!!!

Until next time my lovely readers,
Kristen :)