"I was always shy kind of a person. In childhood, I had a lot of friends but as we grew up, things started to change, my friends started to drift apart as their moms said they should not spend their time with a person like me who didn't have a mother. They were sure I would have loose morals, they feared if I will spoil their daughters. "

Rishi squeezed her hand in his. It's traumatic for a child to be left out like that just because they are a little different from other children. He looked at her to find her looking at a distant with sadness in her eyes. He felt helpless, only if he could take away her pain.

"Initially, I used to cry out in frustration but slowly and gradually I became used to it. I was used to classmates coming to me for my notes and help in their studies and the next day they would deny even recognizing me. they would be busy with their groups and hell lot of friends. I was envious of all of them, they had so many friends and I had none.
Time passed we entered college. I was determined that I will talk to everyone and will make a lot of friends, with whom I will go for trips, I will click pictures with them, I will eat with them and do all the stuff friends did together. In starting, I did talk to people but with time they too left, I was again left disheartened. Papa tried his best to cheer me up but at that time I just wanted to fit in the social rules. I tried to change my talking style, my looks, and everything where I felt that maybe I am a little less but nothing worked.
You know Rishi what hurts? When everyone ignores you but you don't know the reason for it.
When nothing worked, I accepted the harsh reality. I was again only notes providing Machine. I was again alone in between so many people."

Rishi turned his body towards her, her eyes were dripping, probably Rishi could never feel how it was to be left alone as he was always surrounded by his family and friends. He was always loved. Listening to her, he felt grateful for the love he received. The same love did make him feel frustrated sometimes but now he heard her desiring for such love, he realized he was living her dream.
He wrapped his both hands around her and pulled her closer. He knew she would not like sympathy, what she needed the most at the time was someone listening to her words. She wanted someone to just listen to her. She didn't want anyone's advice. She wanted someone to just be with her. He exactly did that, he let her continue without saying a word. He just held her tightly, telling her he is with her.

"A year and a half passed in a jiffy,  as usual, I was sitting in the canteen with my Book, my books were the only companion who didn't turn their back at me. I was in mid of an interesting chapter where the villain of the story was going to be revealed but there came a boy, a boy who I have never seen. He sat opposite me. "Hey! " He said flashing a smile. I was surprised. Thinking it to be one of the dares of their truth and dare game I thought to ignore him. But he took my book, "her sister is going to turn out the real villain" He closed the book, keeping it on my bag. I glared at him annoyed for spoiling the suspense but he sat there flashing his dimples as if he did a great job.

I kept the book in my bag and decided to search for another place to sit but he jumped in front of me, blocking my way, " You are beautiful! " Nobody really had complimented me except my father and teachers for academics, it was new for me. I felt good. I was very happy that someone found me beautiful. His opinion about my skin mattered to me but why? I didn't have an answer. For that day I went to another place. But from that day on, he started coming in front of me more frequently, he would compliment me, try to talk to me, he would put in every effort to make me talk to him. As this continued for more than a few weeks, I believed he genuinely wanted to be my friend, he wanted to talk to me, he was interested in me. His opinions about me mattered a lot to me. I would listen to each and every word very carefully. He was my friend, Sameer Raheja. "

"Over the months our friendship was blooming. I was glad that now I had a friend. For some reason, Papa didn't like him much but I was possessive about Sameer, over-possessive I would say. I got a  companion after a long time and I couldn't stand anyone badmouthing him. Even a girl in my class whom I liked a little came to me to say that I should stay away from him as he is not a good boy but I shrugged it off thinking her to be jealous of my friend. When in reality I was jealous of everyone. They say you perceive the world how you are yourself. I exactly did that.
My friendship with Sameer eventually turned into a romantic relationship. I was on cloud nine.
We didn't cross the line until we had a fight on a certain day about me being a total statue for him. He said he didn't feel like he was dating someone, it was better to date a doll than to date me. I was hurt, but my love for him overpowered my senses, I thought he was right. He was always right for me. I could see he was sad because of me, his friends were making fun of him just because of me. He was bearing so much just because of me. I was scared what if he broke the friendship. I was just so scared. How would I live without him? and finally, I gave in to his demands. "

The last part came out as a whisper from her mouth, she was ashamed of her past self. Her heart burns in fury when she recalls how dumb she was then. She looked at Rishi to check if he was disgusted by her but when she looked at him she found only concern for her. He forwarded his cup of coffee to her. Taking a few sips, she again looked at him to confirm if he still wanted to listen to her. What if she was again in a delusion of her own fairy tales? But he still didn't show any sign of being angry or embarrassed at her.

"Just two weeks later of the completion of my graduation, I got to know that I was pregnant. I was terrified, I had just completed my Graduation and was looking for colleges to do my master's and  I was pregnant at 21. All my dreams crashed, I didn't want all of it to be like this. I was an ambitious girl, I had planned different things for myself. I wanted to first set up my career first and then the marriage part came. Somehow I consoled myself that's it was all fine, since Sameer was there, he would help me. We will together find out a solution, he would never leave me but all my dreams shattered when he broke up after learning that I was pregnant. I tried to reach him but he got away with, " I didn't want to be a father so soon. I am so young right now. You have spoiled my life. Please don't contact me ever". After that, he didn't pick up my calls or bothered to reply to my messages.  I just asked him to send me a handwritten note wherein he will never demand the custody of the child in the future which he gladly did "

Rishi kept stroking her hair as her head lay against his chest. He was infuriated at the Man who left her just like that. She loved him so much to blindly trust his each and every word and he just left her like that? He could not even imagine what she would have felt like. Her heart must have broken into zillion pieces. Now he understood why she was afraid to believe his promises. the Man had made so many false promises to her that now she was afraid of Promises. She feared if they were hallow too. His chain of thoughts broke when she continued,

"I dropped my education till Suchi turned a year old. After that, I completed my master's while interning at Dad's company.
Rishi, the thing which hurts me the most is that I hurt my father in all the fiasco. I was so dumb and so blind by love that I didn't even realize how much I was hurting my hero who was always my support. He did everything for me. You know once he wore my mother's saree and danced for me just because I was upset that on mother's day, mothers of my classmates were dancing in a group. I mistook that only I was alone. My old man was too. After my mother only I was left to whom he could share his words, his feelings but what did I do? I ignored him, his care, his warnings that my choice is not good. I took his love for granted, I went so low that I yelled at him, "please papa! Stop being so irritating. You just want my only friend to part ways with me right? Please papa let me live my life. I know what is right and what is wrong, you don't need to keep shouting it in my ears. I am so frustrated even with your voice. I just hate you for trying to control my life. For god's sake, let me be happy" I yelled those ugly words to him after that I hardly heard him talking to me. "

"I am disgusted with the way I behaved with him. When he came to know about me being pregnant, he was shaken up. Even he wanted me to set my career first. Even then he took care of me. He again did everything for me but I craved to hear his voice.
After Suchi was born Papa always showed that he didn't care for Suchi and didn't like her but I saw him secretly giving her chocolates and playing with her when he thought I was not around. My papa is a softie. I knew he could never dislike that innocent soul."

Saanvi smiled through her tears, remembering her father. She only had respect for him. Her heart was burdened with guilt but she never got the courage to say sorry to him. But her father could already see how sorry she was. He still wanted his little Saan to come to him and talk but his Saan was too guilt-stricken that she didn't even look at him. When she was going away from him, he could not control his tears, he bless his child with his heart. He talked to her making both of their lives a little easy.

Rishi kissed her hair as she kept crying on his chest. Snaking his arms around her waist he held her tighter.
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Please ignore grammatical mistakes.

Happy Mahashivratri🥰❤✨.

If I will update more frequently, you guys will start loving me more and if you will start loving me more then my Fu-tu-re hubby will get jealous as you already know what a possessive man he is. So updates less frequently okay 🥰.

Thanks for reading❤.