Yibo turns the key and checks on Sean before opening the door. later one slightly nods and walks in, looking around with curiosity. Yibo stops at the door and awkwardly coughs, thinking what to do. Sean still looks on the edge of fainting, his eyes red and swollen from crying. detective knows that something too serious happened, but doesn't dare to ask. why bother? he won't be honest as always

"are you feeling better now? maybe need some medicine?"

"Are you sure that no one followed us?"

"Mn, I checked it few times. Why? Are you running away from him? Did that bastard hurt you because of me?" Yibo finally moves forward and is about to touch him, but Sean shakes his head and takes step back

"I'm ok"

"since when are you suffering from asthma? is it serious?"

"usually it doesn't affect my life, only very strong stress can cause asthma attacks"

"don't you dare to say that again, to ask..."

"I'm sorry"

"rest at first and we can talk later, if you're willing of course"

"By the way, what is this place? did you have another flat too?"

"Hmm. it can be called common flat of friends? we're having some fun here during our academy years. But of course doing it separately"

"using for one night stands right? Were you popular boy? How many did you..." Sean locks eyes with him and Yibo feels his face burning "I see, you're spending time wisely"

"why do you sound this jealous? I didn't know you back then, should I save my virginity for you?"

"it's only you who thinks so"

"what?"

"if you knew me already? then what?"

"maybe things were going to be different? both being students with less life burdens? maybe we could give our love more chance? that day when I met Zhan, I know you were there too. if I follow him back, if I ask for your number"

"if...if is most painful word ever Yibo. but I think we're never meant to be. that day when we almost met, was last happy one in my life. since then I was thrown into tormenting hell and it can't be change anymore"

"Sean" Yibo walks closer and hesitantly holds Sean's hand, deeply looking into his eyes "do you know what is hardest for me? I can't get when you're honest and when you're lying. you look at me with this pure, beautiful eyes now, filled with pain. when you do this my heart aches, I get madly desire to take you away, to hide and protect you from everyone. to cover you with my body, anytime someone tries to hurt you. at times like this my love becomes even stronger, I'm ready to kill, to die for you. I know I sound too silly now, maybe you think that I'm stupid young boy but...this is what my heart feels and I can't hide in anymore"

"Yibo, please stop"

"you keep giving me hope, I start thinking that you're opening for me and we're getting closer. when next day comes and you erase our progress again, making me think it was all my imagination. do you know? just few hours ago I thought about you as murderer. I asked myself, what do you prefer Yibo? taking all blame on you or the man you love being guilty? no, I better lose myself than you"

"so..." Sean painfully smiles and moves back, avoiding Yibo's touch "you can't accept me being guilty? you know very well what kind of person I'm"

"I wanna believe that you have your reasons, I wanna believe you're suffering and that is why. even sometimes you look evil, I can't believe you're able to harm someone. can't you share it? please, I'll do everything to help"

"my methods aren't suitable for righteous policeman like you. some trashy bastard died because of you and you made it tragedy. so what? not everyone's death it worth of worry"

"you don't understand"

"right, that is why I advice...just mind your own business from now on, detective Wang Yibo" Sean pushes him back and walks into bathroom, locking door behind. Yibo sighs and sits down on the bed, rubbing his temples. how come it ended by him hurting Sean again? will they ever be able to fix it all?

***

Sean leaves bathroom and stops at the door surprised by the view in front of him. Yibo puts few dishes on the table and fakes smile noticing him. doctor avoids looking at his tearful eyes and asks as nothing happened

"what are you doing?"

"are you feeling better after taking bath? you look very freshen and...beautiful with red cheeks and wet hair"

"such a nonsense, what exactly do you want?"

"can't you just be nice for once?"

"anyway thanks for taking care of me" Sean mumbles and quickly takes his jacket, walking towards the door "I'm leaving"

"can't we..." suddenly he feels tight grip around his waist and Yibo's chin on his neck "for just one day, can't we be happy? can't we act like carefree boyfriends? we're here all alone, far from outer, dark world. please stay, please remove your shields for once and just be my Sean. I wanna say your name with adoration and not with fear and suspicion. let's forget reality and hide ourselves into colorful bubble. just for once, can't you spare me Sean?"

"do you even know how to cook? is it edible?" Sean suddenly asks after few minutes of silence and gently removes his arms. he turns back with slight smile and wipes Yibo's tears away "didn't you buy products for your mom? won't she be worried?"

"I already called and warned her. she thought...I left with my girlfriend"

"not bad idea, I hope you find someone who is able to make you happy" noticing Yibo's frown, Sean stops and lowers eyes "I'm sorry"

"and I hope it's you, who I'll bring to home and introduce mom as my life partner. do you know what she gonna say?"

"nope"

"that you're too good for me" Yibo giggles loudly and Sean's eyes brightens visibly with adoration "she'll like you I'm sure"

"such a sweet talker"

"come here let's eat, or it will get cold" Yibo forces Sean to sit down at the table and fills his plate with different dishes. detective leans chin on his palm and keeps looking at him, until Sean sighs with annoyance and takes first byte "how is it? good?"

"if you plan poisoning me yes" Yibo's nose falls down right away and Sean laughs, filling his mouth again "just kidding you sulky boy, it's delicious" doctor keeps chewing tastily and empties almost every dishes. just realizing what happened he looks at Yibo with widen eyes and gasps seeing detective crying. Yibo turns away and wipes tears, hiding them from him

"you eat so well"

"is something wrong? you turned into cry baby today"

"the sound of your laughter...so rare and precious. can you do it more often?"

"mn, if you cook for me again"

"you have terrible taste, you know? I once cooked for my friends and can you guess what happened? there was long line at the bathroom. Lei said he would stop flirting with girls if survive that day"

"so?"

"that bastard didn't die, but broke promise right away"

"you have very nice friends, I kind of envy you"

"what about you?"

"I have none, I can't afford to. I have seen many times how carefree you look next to them, teasing, laughing, jumping like kid. that is my favorite Yibo...happy Yibo" Sean reaches his hand and Yibo gasps feeling doctor's soft lips caressing his fingers "It's been years since I enjoy eating, it doesn't matter is it delicious or not, as long as company is nice. there is always unbearable coldness in my house, there is always someone extra or missing at our table. it's been long since me and Yanlin have something to talk about. we're happy siblings once, but now only thing I want is to be left alone. I eat fancy food outside with fancy people, who are all disgusting inside. I just eat to survive but the joy, I felt it only now, with you"

"I'll cook for you everyday, for the whole life, you just need to stay by my side. I'll improve my skills for you, I can learn more from mom"

"why can't you obey even just once Yibo? you won't be able to be happy next to me, I'll take smile away from you. don't you see? you've fallen into my trap too deeply and can't find way out. tell me honestly, can you imagine our future together? ask yourself, do you really love me?"

"what about you Sean? wasn't it you who approached me first today? you should ask yourself too"

"when I got into taxi couldn't even talk properly. driver turned to me and ask, who can comfort you now? your address was first one coming into my mind, you're always first and last one for me Yibo"

"what is the way for us to be together? what I need to give up on?"

"yourself, you should stop being yourself Yibo"

*****

Jiang waves hand to Yanlin, who just enters cafe and gets up signing her to sit down. woman smiles and places few document cases on the table

"did I make you wait long? sorry, I had some problems"

"no worries, it's me always bothering you. is everything ok now?"

"just my brother being troublemaker as always. he just vanishes suddenly and no one knows where he went"

"same as my friend?" Jiang sighs and calls for waiter "what would you like to drink?"

"just orange juice, I can't drink coffee late"

"ok" Jiang orders and turns to her again, hesitating to keep talking "I thought about it a lot, I can't help myself but want Sean to disappear from Yibo's life. I feel like your brother is trying to destroy him and enjoying it too much"

"he isn't that kind of person, my both brothers are such a angels"

"you can't even lie Yanlin, everything is written on your face"

"it looks like you're very protective of your friends? they're both lucky and...and the second one, his name is Lei right?"

"yes, why?"

"maybe I'm interested in him?" Yanlin laughs and Jiang's expression drastically changes without him noticing "why are you this shocked? yes, he is younger than me, but I don't think it's this huge problem at all. Lei seems bright and funny person, he can help at coloring my boring life"

"Lei is a player, not suitable for serious woman like you. I can't even imagine you two being in the romantic relationship"

"not you badmouthing him right away. by any chance do you like me?"

"I only see you as colleague, I never hesitate when it comes to admitting my feelings"

"you sure? it seems different for me" Yanlin mockingly stares at him and Jiang lowers eyes. Lei's all past relationships lasted only for few weeks or months, he would sulk, whine, cry but find new one very soon. both Jiang and Yibo were so used to it, but with Yanlin it could be different. Lei just moved to his house and became his family, he just felt that strong possessiveness over him. there is no way he can let go of him for some woman's weird obsession...

"I'll help to get closer to him" he fakes smile and reaches cases "let's move to main reason of our meeting, did you bring what I asked for?"

"yes and no one could see me. take look at it" Yanlin waits until Jiang reads it all and slight smirk shakes her lips noticing visible worry on young man's face "is something wrong?"

"there is something very fishy about that boy's disappearance. I'm sure Chen is little part of very serious crime scheme. this isn't case that beginner detective like Yibo can handle"

"so, what are you going to do? lying to your friend?"

"I...I don't know. he is too persistent and won't give up this easily"

'it isn't like he didn't do the same. I mean deceiving his friends" Yanlin taps finger on another case and whispers "his righteousness isn't the reason Yibo became detective. he has other plans, but I'm sure you know nothing about it" Jiang hesitates before opening it, but information inside makes him freeze. he stays silent for a few minutes and then moves stare to her, wondering about something

"you hate Yibo right?"

"is it this visible?"

"and you love playing with others' feelings. you know very well that these cases can lead Yibo to death and this is exactly what you want. didn't he suffer enough already because of your brother, what more do you plan to do?"

"you're smart one"

"you're putting me into worst position. Yibo will find out about everything one day anyway and my silence gonna break our friendship but...how can I doom him like that?"

"you have choice to make right?" Yanlin grins and gets up, moving juice glass towards him "here drink something cold, you really need it now. tell your friend to leave his nose into his own business from now on and leave my brothers. I'm not nice person like them"

"please you all stay away from him, I beg you"

"he should do the same or I can do more jiang, remember my words"

*****

Sean doesn't wait for answer and gets up, slowly walking towards bed. Yibo keeps watching how cutely he yawns, how adorable his frown of annoyance is, when blanket gets stuck under his legs. The way he rubs nose on the pillow to stop himself from sneezing, absolutely every tiny thing he does feels too precious and Yibo knows...one day he is going to face the worst dilemma ...love or principles?

He carefully washes the dishes and then takes short shower. At the time Yibo gets back, Sean is already sleeping soundly, looking ethereal as always. Yibo lays down too slowly, leaving big place between them. His eyes feels too heavy, but keeps fighting against dizziness just to cherish this precious moment. Sean suddenly turns towards him and Yibo is about to fake sleep but gets caught "sorry for waking you up, do you want me to sleep on the sofa?"

"no, I need you next to me" Sean smiles and moves forward until their bodies almost touches. His hand slowly runs up on Yibo's nape and his fingers teasingly messes detective's hair. Yibo stays still although he is burning inside and just keeps looking into his eyes.

"So this is how it could be?" Sean asks with trembling voice and his thumb caresses Yibo's parted lips "is this happiness we could get in another life?"

"Sean..."

"Being this close, feeling each-other's warmth, sharing breath and heartbeat, how precious it's right? I wanna go to sleep with you, I wanna see your face first after waking up, I wanna do silly things like other normal couples. I want to dream and love too. Why? Why everything beautiful is forbidden for me?"

"Then do it, dare and love me"

"Don't I already?" Sean places Yibo's hand on his chest and softens his voice "can't you hear? How loud my heartbeat is next to you. how my eyes, my voice, my whole being changes when you're close. can you imagine how hard it's for me to stay away?"

"Who am I talking to now?"

"Sean from past, who is going to disappear very soon. That pure side you awoken in me, but won't last long. So, why won't you hold into me? You're too far"

"I'm ashamed, I'm still disgusted by myself" Yibo lowers eyes and tries to stop tears from falling "do I have right to touch you? Don't you really hate me?"

"I know...maybe that night hurt you even more than me. I took many things from you Yibo, I have to say sorry too" Sean gets closer and cuddles at him, wrapping his arm around Yibo's waist "Just feeling of our cheeks touching, so warm so homely"

"You being romantic, it kind of scares me"

"you said we should act like this for one night right? hating it now?"

"I'm scared because it feels too good, I'm scared because I'm going to get used to it" Yibo gently wraps arm around Sean's slim waist and kisses his forehead, keeping the touch. it feels like the most beautiful dream ever, he dies to keep seeing forever "when time comes...I want to choose your love"

"no matter what?"

"no matter what" Sean looks up and cups Yibo's face, bringing their lips together. kiss is too smooth and light, but filled with emotions. he tightly closes eyes and is going to follow desires but suddenly loud sounds rings into his ears "you don't deserve to be happy, you don't deserve to be happy, you don't deserve to be happy" Sean's face shakes from pain and covers ears with his palms, trying not to hear anymore

"what is wrong? what is wrong my love?"

"can you keep talking until I fall asleep? about anything, it doesn't matter just...just for one night I want to stop him from torturing me" Sean hides himself into Yibo's chest and tightly holds his shirt "is your love strong enough to take my nightmares away?"

Sometimes I find it too impossible to make their love and relationship work 😓 I mean it's too hard to find way to happiness. I even managed it in the "Dark Society" so maybe 😊

anyway I can't believe they're together in the whole chapter, finally our poor babies got some sweet moments 🥺