Cameron Moore was throwing the after party that we were going to. He was one of Jordan's friends and his parents conveniently weren't home so he had an open house and open bar.

He was taking everyone's keys though and making everyone who drank crash at his place so at least we would be safely drinking which is all you can really ask for.

After Jordan dapped Cameron up he gave me a hug.

I snuck out from under his arm and went to the bathroom to make sure I didn't look a total mess.

Luckily I looked fine and as I was escaping the bathroom my hand was tagged from behind and I was dragged back in.

"Harper," I screamed after my heart stopped racing.

I expected her to laugh or say something but when she didn't I knew something was off.

"What happened?" I asked her as she sat on the toilet.

She dodged the question. "I brought your after party clothes," she said, shaking the bag it was in.

"What's wrong Harper?" I said sternly.

She looked me dead in the eyes. "I lost it Charlotte."

I looked at her like she was insane. "You lost what?"

"I lost IT."

My eyes widened.

"With Liam?" I whispered.

She nodded.

I tried not to panic.

"Okay." I whispered while wringing my hands together. "Was it- I mean was it good?"

She made an awkward face and shrugged.

"I don't know?"

"Well..." I said starting to backtrack. "I mean everyone's first time is sort of bad. It doesn't really mean anything."

She was quiet.

"You used protection right?" I asked.

"We're accident babies Charlotte. I'm not going to be the accident baby that has an accident baby."

"True enough."

"I feel strange," Harper admitted.

"Do you... regret it?"

"I don't know. I think I just feel like a part of me is missing."

"You're still the same person Harper. Virginity means nothing."

"And I know that but I can't shake the feeling."

I bit my lip. "Do you want to talk it through or do you need a distraction for a bit to process?"

"I'm going to go with door number two," she said jokingly.

"Okay friend," I said worriedly.

"Charlotte I'm fine," she said with a smile. "Relax."

And 20 minutes later when she was drunk off her ass and dancing on tables I found I could no longer relax.

***

Margot and Elyse had no idea what was up with Harper so they probably thought Harper was just getting with the festivities. But I was half tempted to drag her ass out of there so she could um you know, deal with her actual problem and not drink to death.

Liam was looking at her worriedly as well and eventually I decided that we needed to talk. I was sitting on Jordan's lap while he talked to a friend and I let him know I needed to get up to talk to Liam and so he loosened his hold on me.

"Keep an eye on Harper for me please," I told him as I walked away.

I tapped Liam on the shoulder to ask if we could talk and he followed me into one of the rooms so I could hear him over the music.

I shut the door and studied him.

"Harper told me what happened."

"I figured," he said.

"Did anything happen?"

He shook his head. "I didn't pressure her or anything. It came out of left field for me too and now I feel like I made the wrong decision."

I tapped my foot. "I can't really tell exactly it is right now but I think she's just scared. Harper's families like super catholic and purity culture is a thing for her. She might just feel guilty."

Liam blew out a breath. "What should I do?"

"Just don't treat her any different. Remind her that she shouldn't feel guilty for something so natural."

"You really think that's it?" he asked.

I nodded. "You have to realize that even if Harper isn't religious she still might have internalized that stuff.

Either way Harper can be very secretive when she wants to be. She won't talk about certain things until you back her into a corner."

He pulled at his hair.

"I feel like total shit," he muttered.

"It's not your fault," I told him.

"Shit happens," I said while touching his shoulder. "Just treat her with care for a bit. Harper's tough but she can also be pretty fragile. And I know that eventually she'll be fine. So since at least for now she's drunk and happy maybe we should be too."

Liam hugged me and I hugged him back.

He was a good guy.

We walked out of the room together and drunk Harper smiled when she saw me and Liam.

"Charlie, I think you and I should sing a song," she said with a giggle.

I was going to say something but Margot started laughing hysterically from behind her as if something was funny.

I closed my mouth and sighed cause this dumb bitch was drunk too.

Liam wandered over to Jordan who was playing beer pong with some other guys. And I turned back to the girls.

"Where's Elyse?" I asked.

Margot leaned in like she was going to whisper, and honestly she might have tried, but when she screamed that Elyse was out getting laid by her boyfriend she realized she failed.

I ignored Margot and I texted Elyse quickly to make sure she was alright. I checked her location and then 10 minutes later she confirmed Margot's sentiment.

It seemed I was the mom for tonight which wasn't so bad since I wasn't much of a drinker. It did suck when my friends were annoying drunks.

However even though I wasn't drunk I did probably have a second hand high from the stench of weed (and sweat) but I mean it is what it is.

I was also extremely tired because it was 3 hours past my bedtime and I was still wearing my prom dress because I couldn't leave my drunk friends unattended. However since they were in the sights of their own dates I figured I could sneak away for a bit.

I actually brought cute sexy party clothes that I needed to wear because I didn't plan this fit for nothing.

I put on another dress. This one black and mini. It gave me good cleavage and cinched at the waist. I put my hair up since I could feel it frizzing up again due to the heat. I pulled some tendrils out and flattened the dress down my body.

Everyone else was wearing pretty revealing clothing so even with my mini dress I would stand out but at least I wasn't over dressed anymore.

I walked out of the bathroom and walked to Jordan's car where I put my clothes next to his wrinkled tux.

When I came back inside I wandered over to Jordan to see if I could play beer pong with the guys.

Upon arrival Jordan looked me up and down before releasing a slow smile. He leaned in for a quick kiss and then I turned around so I could keep my friends in my line of sight.

I straightened out my dress and then teetered on my heels to face the boys. I spun too quickly and Jordan's arm wrapped around my waist to steady me after I almost toppled over. I finally gained my balance after an embarrassingly long time and brushed the hair out of my face before looking at everyone.

"Hey," I said with a little wave.

They all looked at me like I was amusing and I just shot them an awkward smile back.

"What?" I asked.

Matt laughed softly.

"What's so funny?" I repeated.

"You," Brent, another friend of Jordan's said.

I rolled my eyes.

Jordan's eyes rested on my hip and I knew he was smiling from behind me.

However, instead of trying to decipher the mystery that is boys I ignored them and moved on.

"Can I play?"

Everyone shrugged.

Jordan was already playing with Liam so Cameron and I set up to play against them.

I sank my first two balls and so did Jordan. I drank the foul substance before wrinkling my nose and shuddering.

Everyone laughed but I didn't participate. I was focused.

Cameron went and got one ball in and Liam got two. I got one ball in the next round and Jordan got no balls in.

I blew him a kiss as thanks because I fucking hated beer.

Eventually we had three cups still up. One cup I needed to hit and two Jordan needed to hit.

Cameron was cheering me on from behind and I held my body so still so I could get this ball in. I leaned over slightly and threw the ball against the table only for it to hit the rim and roll away.

I blew a breath angrily and tried again only to miss again.

Jordan sank one of his cups easy and then on the last one he shot me a little smirk before sinking the other one just as easily.

I pushed the hair out of my face and I made a face before flicking him off.

I moved out of the way for someone else to take a turn and ended up sitting on Jordan's lap again while other people were going.

He put his hand on my back and looked up at my face after staring at the space between my breasts and my legs.

"I like your dress," he told me softly.

My face heated.

"I know," I told him. "I can feel that."

He laughed because this fool had no shame.

"You want a chance to really feel-"

"Jordan," I yelled.

Which only made him laugh harder.

***

I was laying next to Jordan on a random bed in a guest room and I realized we hadn't slept next to each other since we were at least 8.

The thought of it made me laugh and when I explained it to Jordan he laughed too.

"My dad put a stop to that real quick," I said on a laugh.

His hands skimmed my torso.

"For good reasons," he said.

I made a noise in the back of my throat and smacked his arm.

"We were 8, Jordan," I reminded him. "I was thinking about Hannah Montana and getting my mom to buy me heelys."

"I was a good multi tasker. I might have been thinking about other shit but believe me 12 year old me was thinking about you," Jordan told me.

That was kinda sweet in a weird way so I just smiled.

"Remember in middle school at the 8th grade formal when I wore that ugly grey dress?"

He laughed.

"Yeah. I told you that dress was ugly, but you tried to tell me it was cute so I just let you do your thing."

"Well you should have tried harder because it had feathers on it. I looked like a literal bird."

His lips quirked up.

"The night before, at Hannah Crosswell's sleepover party, everyone ganged up on me and dared me to kiss you."

He clutched his hand to his heart dramatically.

"So then why didn't you?"

I hit his arm again.

"Because I was scared. And you went with Gia. I'm not a homewrecker."

"Shut up. A homewrecker? This was the 8th grade."

I rolled my eyes.

"You know what I mean."

"I would have kissed you back," he told me.

I smiled at the ceiling.

"I know that now," I told him.

"Why didn't you kiss me when Mike Tavers dared you to?" I asked.

"Honestly I was going to but you looked nervous and I just misread it. I thought you didn't want to do it," he said.

"I probably looked that way because I was scared you didn't want to do it."

"I know that now," He told me.