I've been thinking about a lot of things lately. The other day, I was just going about my normal business when I almost blurted this out:

I miss you. You're all the friends I had but could never keep; the friends I thought I could trust with my life but backstabbed me in the end. You're the friends I destroyed myself for; the ones who let me think I was never good enough.

But some of you—you're the friends I wish I hadn't betrayed. I thought we could be friends forever, but I didn't know that forever didn't exist back then. We grew up; we grew apart. We're strangers now.

The worst thing is that I don't know if the friends I have now will become strangers eventually. I don't think we could ever become strangers, but that's what I thought last time.

I miss you, Anna.
I miss you, Nova.
I miss you, Lila.
I miss you, Katie.
I miss you, Lucy.
I miss you, Mellie.
I miss all of you.

Please don't leave me, Laura.
Please don't leave me, Alessandra.
Please don't leave me, Jessica.
Please don't leave me, Ash.
Please don't leave me, Beatrice.
Please don't leave me, Selena.
I don't want anyone else to become a stranger.

Life works in mysterious ways. I don't know what will happen. I can't take anything for granted. I could die today. I could die in fifty years. You could die today. You could die in fifty years. So just know that I'm sorry. Just know that I miss you. Just know I don't want to lose anyone else.

This is for all the friends I don't have anymore, and for the ones that I still have. This is for the friends I have yet to meet.

I miss you. Please don't leave me.

~