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Chapter 11 (1)

Back at Beth's host home, Nora and Owen had laid out a whole table of food for dinner. Stewed beef, onion soup, garlic bread, poutine...the dining room became more hearty with all the steam coming up from the pots and bowls. However, Beth was not in the mood of eating. While Julianna helped Owen clean up the kitchen, she curled up on her seat by the table, anxiously staring at her message to Simone, which wrote Simmy, me and Jules feel very sorry. Can we talk?. It was left on read for a couple of hours already.

"Where's Simone? Will she be here for dinner tonight?" Owen asked.

"I don't think she will come. She's probably at home now." Julianna replied.

"What happened to her?" Nora noticed that Beth looked under the weather. "Also Beth, you haven't been talkative today. Is there something that happened between the three of you?"

"Well..we had a fight." Beth put down her phone. "To be exact, Julianna and Simone were fighting with each other over if I should go to the dinner party organized by Bianca."

"Beth's mother was against Beth from going to the event," Julianna added. "I did agree with her that going to the event doesn't have a substantial influence on Beth getting acceptance from Lisette University. However, it seems that Beth really admires and idolizes Bianca. It's fine if she wants to see Bianca before she leaves Laurel."

"Is Bianca at Laurel City now? At the networking event?" Owen interrupted Beth. "We didn't see her this morning."

"She was wearing formal attire and working as a volunteer at the event for her fall break. I think she might have been busy catering to all the audiences this afternoon."

"How did you recognize her? Did you contact her before you went to the event?"

"Not really apart from following her art on social media." Beth rolled her hair with her fingers and looked away from Owen. "I have no idea how to start a conversation with her. She posts those intricate, intimate illustrations and literary passages that talk about lingering feelings and mental insomnia through the lens of a single floating leaf. Other times it was philosophical musings and critiquing the limits of logic. Sometimes she posts photos of herself sitting by the window pane, drinking wine in her pajamas. Fortunately, fate did me a favor. I found her during the networking event and worked up my courage to ask her if she was Bianca. Voila!"

'Well, it's great that you guys met! Was she doing alright?'

'She's probably out there changing the world..." Beth lowered her voice. "Seriously, I want to be like her. Talented, independent, and beautiful. It seems that my own mom doesn't even see me becoming that way one day. She was always so critical."

"Beth, I think you are doing better and better. And we will tell your parents about your progress at Laurel Prep." Nora and Owen ensured Beth not to worry. "Your mom's words say more about her than about you. Maybe she had no room for errors when she was growing up. Maybe she was simply preventing you from making mistakes and getting hurt. Either way, I think you should sit down and talk to her, even if it's going to be difficult.'

'What about Simone?' Beth asked. 'I didn't expect her to be insecure about her abilities as a Laurel student, or her friendship with me. I felt like I didn't know too much about her before our fight today.'

'Then get to know about her.' Owen passed the garlic bread basket to Beth, upon noticing that food had been piling up on her plate, untouched. 'What about we eat first and talk later? Being hungry is not good for us.'

Everyone didn't talk much for the rest of dinner time. After dinner, Owen and Nora occupied the couch and had the TV on in front of them. Owen asked Beth about Julianna's address, saying that he would be driving Julianna back before it got too late into the day. In the meantime, Beth decided to show Julianna around her bedroom. The two girls walked through a corridor, in which Beth's bedroom was situated on the right side. A beige knitted blanket was loosely spread out on top of the twin-sized bed, which sat beside the window. Several fluffy pillows of pink and gold were also found on top of the bed. The window wall was the home to several posters — the "girl boss" poster, some vintage graphic posters, and a couple of collages made with online fashion inspiration.

A wooden clothes rack was placed on the right side of the bed. Beth kept the dresses and coats on her rack while placing her sweaters, pants, and undergarments in separate clothes baskets. Flipping through the clothes on the rack, Julianna noticed the sunflower dress Beth wore on the first day of school. Right next to it was a mint chiffon dress. It had soft ruffles on the edges and small, shiny ribbons all over it. She hadn't seen that one before; it reminded her of party dresses designed for special social occasions.

Finally, Julianna directed her attention toward Beth's study area in her room. Several textbooks sat on top of Beth's laptop. On the edge of the desk Directly above Beth's desk was the lilac-colored banner of Lisette University School of Art, surrounded by string fairy lights and photos attached to them.

She occupied the chair in front of the desk, while Beth jumped unto the bed.

"I love your room. It's such a cozy and sentimental place." Julianna said.

"Thank you, Jules! Make yourself comfortable here."

Julianna caught Beth glancing over messages on her phone again.

'Has Simone replied to you yet?'

'Not really...I guess we probably need to wait for a day to pass before we continue saying anything to her.' Beth sighed. 'Please don't get upset about what Simmy said about your middle school classmate talking behind your back. She was probably just being reactive and blunt all of a sudden.'

There was a pause for several seconds before Julianna uttered another word.

'Back when I was in middle school, a lot of my classmates called me smart. They approached me in order to seek academic help. These people were constantly talking about how I had the potential to go to Marie-Lisette Academy. The truth was that I wasn't satisfied with being called ''smart' if I couldn't fulfill the meaning behind it. Every day I find new things to learn about and new ways to improve the world. The more I know, the more I realize I don't know. What I wanted was to find peers with which I can share things that interest me.'

'Was that the reason why you sent your articles in our group chat?'

'Exactly.' Julianna nodded. 'I thought we were going to have interesting conversations around those topics. I didn't mean to come off as a show-off, or to assume Simone didn't care about reading the articles.'

'Well, remember what I said tonight about how I hesitated to contact Bianca. Simmy might have read what you sent, but couldn't find the courage to tell you about what she thinks. After all, she has those images of you being a reserved 4.0 student and having a plan for everything.'

'Well, I'm actually neither of these." Julianna shrugged. "Anyways, why did you befriend Simone? What do you like about her in particular?'

'At first, I didn't like Simone as well.' Beth brushed her chin with her finger. 'Later I found that she was more than meets the eye. Simone is playful, but she wasn't the type to lose herself in the admiration of others. Fame doesn't deter her from forming connections with other people and discovering herself. She struggled a lot with catching up on academics after quitting acting but still made it into Laurel Prep on her grades. Whenever I hang out with her, I wouldn't feel pressured by her identity as an influencer. All I see was someone who makes a lot of funny faces, is obsessed with strawberry cheesecake, and loves when people say her music made their day. Making friends doesn't always require a list of tangible qualities. Simone was special to me; that's enough.'

Julianna hesitated to say anything. She looked over Beth's fairy light photos and stopped at the ones which had Beth, herself, and Simone.

"Oh, I see. There are things that I don't understand about Simone, but I want to get to know about her more."

"Well, I hope you guys get along well." Beth smiled. "Speaking of which, is your family alright? I haven't seen them for a while. You mentioned that they adopted you because of their previous daughter. Maybe that's not what they intended to do. Maybe there are some reasons behind the decision, reasons that your parents might be shielding you from."

"We never talked about them at home, and I guess we may never will. It seems that my parents just avoid this issue altogether." Julianna said.

"But you are concerned with the truth, right? Don't you want to know the truth about yourself?"

The air turned quiet after Beth spoke her last word. Dead quiet. Small particles seemed to be suspended in the midair, drifting in the warm splendors of the fairy lights. As Julianna remained in her seat, her blue hair rested naturally on her shoulders, almost extending to her waist. She took in a deep breath, stood up, tucked a lock of her blue hair behind her ears, and turned to the photos again. Her eyes were concentrated on the small, pixelated figures in the photos as if she was carefully examining the forms of such figures. Then, she slowly extended her right hand towards the photos, moving her hand up and down, as if she was feeling the forms at the forefront of her fingertips. The silence was broken as Owen pushed open the room and looked inside. Julianna instantly retrieved her hands and looked at him.

"Julianna, when do you want to head home? We can leave in a minute if you are okay with it." He asked.

"That's fine, it's kinda late now." Julianna decided to follow Owen's speech. Then she turned to Beth. "Beth, is it alright with you that we hang out more next time?"

"Are you leaving now?"

Julianna quickly blinked her eyes twice.

"Well, I'd love for you to stay longer today, but if you want to leave, I'm fine with that," Beth replied. "Have a good night, and I will see you tomorrow at school."

"Thanks. It might be a little early to mention, but please let me know how Wednesday dinner goes. I hope you have a good time and get the opportunity to talk to Bianca more."

"Of course, I will!" 

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