Chapter 18:

It has been a few days since Julian came to bring us some take-out while we were hauled up in the office, trying to put our finger on the exact problem. And it made sense. Harrington Inc. originally was a hotel chain that aimed its main business on those who traveled for business. The slowing down of business has nothing to do with me being a single woman being in charge, that was just the stupidest argument they could come up with. Business trips aren't just that big of a deal anymore. The world has caught up to the life of the business. The number of flights has certainly increased, so most national business trips don't require a night in a hotel as you can easily fly out in the morning, and return that same night. That is, in fact, when a trip is needed at all. A lot of things can be dealt with by conference calls or simple one on one video calls. So, the problem is not me running it all, it is Harrington Inc's outdated formula that is causing the trouble. How convenient for my father to jump ship at exactly the right moment. Right?

Needless to say, the days following that night were long. Very long. I stepped into my office at seven in the morning, and I wouldn't leave till at least eight o'clock at night. I hadn't seen Julian, my mom or my sister, or anyone else for that matter, in five days. We had brief contact in the form of text messages or quick phone calls, but that was about it. Because of that, I shouldn't have been surprised when Allison was kicking me out. She sent Julian a message from my phone, and he knocked on my office door. "Yes! Finally, you're here. Take her! And by taking her, I mean, grab her by the wrist and literally drag her out of here. I told her to go so many times, but she just doesn't listen.'' Allison said, looking at me, daring me to go against her. But, of course, I couldn't do that. I could not let my big secret slip now.

Julian did as he was told, and reached for my hand. I sighed a sigh of defeat and then let him lead me outside. "See you tomorrow," I called over my shoulder to Allison, who just stood there with a smile on her face. It was only half-past 6, and my PA kicked me out. What has become of me? Julian and I neared the elevator when I realized something. "Shoot! I forgot something important. Give me a minute, please?" He just stood there shaking his head with a smile on his face. "Go, just keep in mind that if this takes longer than five minutes, I'll just come in there and carry you out." He leaned in and gave me a sweet kiss. "Now, hurry. Before I change my mind." I gave him another kiss before I hurried back into my office.

"Lucy, seriously? What now?" asked Allison when I stepped inside. "I know you want to fix this problem in order to be able to live your life the way you wish and you want to prove your father wrong, but overworking yourself and not living your life, isn't going to make that happen. Besides that, I really want to go and have dinner with Brandon. And I know that you told me to go whenever I wanted, but that is a bit difficult with Julian still hovering around here. So, leave, please?"

"Relax, Allison. I am leaving. I would just like my bag and phone to go with me." I said stepping around her to fetch my belongings from my desk. "Leave this mess for what it is, I'll clean up tomorrow. Please, take the morning off tomorrow, you deserve it. Tell Brandon I said hi and that I am sorry for keeping you away. I know that with his crazy hours you can't spend much time together. Bye for now." And with that I walked out of my office, making my way back to the elevator. "I am all set. Thank you for being patient with me."

While we waited for the elevator, Julian wrapped his arms around me from behind and pulled me close to his chest. "I swear to God, woman, you are working yourself to death if you go on like this. You and your boss both for that matter. I know that you want to fix what is broken, and I truly admire the time and effort you both put in but, please, don't forget to live while doing it." He pressed a kiss to my neck and nuzzled his nose against my hair.

For a moment, I managed to forget all that was going on. I forgot the crappy situation I was in, the poor relationship with my father, the problems within the company. At this moment, all I could feel was how good Julian was for me. And then it hit me. He was not good for me. He could not be good for me, he doesn't even know me. He knows the version of me I let him believe I was. He has no idea who I am, what I do, or why I do it. He has no clue. This realization, which of course, has always been present in the back of my head, made me step away from him slightly.

I need to tell him, he deserves to know the truth. Sure, he spilled coffee over me more than once, he isn't perfect. But he deserves the truth. But once I tell him, I doubt that he'll understand, that he could get over the fact I lied about who I am. I mean, what kind of person would do that? I wouldn't easily accept it if it would be the other way around. Just why didn't I tell him that first time I met with him. Because I wanted to prove him wrong. Because I wanted to show I am not type of person that uses her money and position to get what she wanted. But wasn't that exactly I was doing now?

I need to tell him, I know I do. But am I ready to possibly lose him? I was long passed the question of whether he would be good enough for me if he would meet up to the standards that were set by my father. Screw him! All my life I have been jealous of those typical 'daddy-girls'. The kind of girls that were adored by their fathers and how that adoration is mutual. I have been jealous of that feeling of being loved unconditionally by both parents. So why would I ruin my life now in order to please him? I have lived up to all my obligations, all my life. I gave up my dreams in order to keep the business in the family, and I was happy to do so.

Telling Julian the truth now would mean that I could lose him before I really got to know him. Chances are that being honest would result in ending things between us before it even started. But not telling him and keeping my secret is eating at me. It's making me lose my sanity slowly but surely. What happened to honesty is the best policy?

My train of thought was interrupted by the dinging sound of the elevator. The doors opened and we stepped in together. I looked up only to be greeted by Julian's eyes studying my face. "You seem a bit distracted tonight. A penny for your thoughts?"

I smiled up to him, trying to push my thoughts away to the back of my head. "I'm okay. Just hungry and tired. It's been a long and busy day. I just want to eat something and then spend a lazy night on my couch. I'm sorry if you made big plans, but I'm just not in the mood. Sorry." The doors of the elevator closed and I pressed the button to go down to the main floor.

He moved closer to me and lifted my chin with this finger, forcing me to look up to him. He caressed by cheek lightly and I couldn't help myself leaning into his touch, savoring the feeling it gave me. "It is all fine by me. I just worry about you and I think you should relax a little more when you can. I want you to be able to relax when you're with me. So if that means a lazy night in, I am down for that. And If you say now that you want to go home by yourself, I am okay with that too. I just need you to take care of yourself." He pressed a kiss to my forehead.

It's strange that such a small, simple gesture could feel so much more intimate than kissing or having sex. It was a gesture that made me feel safe and sound with a man for the first time in my life. Like he genuinely cared for me.

"I would love to enjoy your company. Please come home with me? We can just order a pizza or Chinese, I don't care."

Julian smiled at me. "In that case, I have a slightly different plan." And he raised a bag of groceries that I haven't noticed before. "I thought that you could use a nice, nutritious home-cooked meal. I have seen the hundreds of take-out menus when I was at your place. Let me cook for you while you enjoy a hot and relaxing bath." I was about to react and to tell him that I don't depend on anyone, but he raised his hand and stopped me before I could speak. "I know what you're going to say. And I know that you don't need anyone, men, in particular, to take care of you. But I want to. Let me do this for you, just tonight."

And right in that moment, I knew I was in deep, deep trouble.

-

"Man, I am in trouble." I thought to myself when I took a sip from my wine, relaxing in my bath. How could I let this thing get to this point? I am falling for this guy and I am falling hard. Never in my life have I felt so cared for by anyone in my life. Except for my mom, of course. Bless her soul. How am I going to tell him my name is not Allison Blake and that I am not an executive assistant? And more importantly, how am I going to tell him that instead, I am Lucienne Harrington, CEO of Harrington Inc. And if all that is done, I can only imagine that when he asks me why I did it, I would have to tell him the only reason why I joined that stupid dating site in the first place because my father set me an ultimatum.

My life is a serious mess right now, and I don't know how to fix it.

There was a soft knock on the bathroom door. "Is everything alright in there? Food will be ready in twenty minutes, so don't rush yourself to anything."

"Thank you. I will be there in a bit. I am done already." I got up from the bathtub an started to climb over the edge, only to be rudely reminded by the fact I forgot to lay out my bath mat. My wet and slippery foot slipped away and I fell to the floor, my head slamming against the toilet on the way down. All I could hear was someone calling out my name in the distance. My sight became blurry before everything around be turned black.