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The Theory

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"THREE CHANCES?"

"Yeah, three doors. I just walked through one to get here and have to find the door that'll take me to the next."

"But what if there's a door to take you back?"

"Take me back? What do you mean?" I asked, and he shifted to get closer.

"Three doors. There was no particular order. No numbers on the door or anything like that?"

I shook my head, still not knowing where he was going with this.

"That means any door could be the first or the last," he said, and confusion forced my brows together.

"I don't understand?"

"Ok, how do I explain this?" His eyes flitted up to the ceiling and back to me. "This is your second chance, but then, it could have been the first. If you had entered this door first, you would have been here first, right?"

"Yeah?"

"That means this door could have also been the third."

"Okay and..."

"And if it was the last, it would have the door that would take you out, as in back to your real life. Meaning each chance would have two doors. In case that chance was the last, it would have, let's call it, the last door."

I paused before I reiterated my summary of his words.

"So, you're saying, every chance could have two doors? The first would take me to the next chance, that's if that chance was first or second, but it would have another... last door in case it was the last chance."

"Exactly! Now, instead of trying to find the next door, we have to find two doors and figure out which is the last door and which just leads you to the next chance."

In the next moment, my eyes widened as realization dawned on me.

"That's genius, Kai," I said, and he gave me a bright smile, one that I returned. Then I slumped back into my chair.

"Now I just have to find out what I was doing wrong that made me come to this memory. The first time, it was about Lilly. But now..." I paused. "I thought it was Jane, my step-mom, but I kinda made peace with her last night, and seeing that I don't know the door I'm supposed to go through, that might mean she's not the reason I'm here."

I sighed. "If only there was a way I could... know what to do."

"How did you know it was Lilly the last time?"

"I figured she was kinda jealous of me. Plus, we were friends when we were younger, but then my mom went to jail and that ruined everything before she moved away. It surprised me when I realized we were in the same high school, but I didn't treat her any better than she treated me," I said.

"So you're saying once upon a time, Lilly was... nice and your friend," he said like I just spun an unreal story.

I smiled. "Yeah, strange right? We were in the same neighborhood and elementary school. She was prim and proper then, and still is now. I don't even know what brought us together, but it's as they say. The best relationships are the ones you don't see coming. But she left, and I never tried or cared to reach out."

"Now I get why she was so bitter to you. I mean, I knew she didn't like the fact that I have feelings for you, but seeing how she and Noah are now dating, I was pretty sure there was more behind her hatred toward you," he said.

"Yeah, we settled things between ourselves, though. After I did that, Mrs. Morris's sister told me, Mrs. Morris told her about the door."

"That's interesting. Why didn't Mrs. Morris tell you when she was warning you?" he asked.

"I guess it's the cave's design. I'll only know my way out after I've done what it brought me here to do."

"Hm. Any idea who's gonna tell you which door now?" he said.

"Nope. Why do we need to know the person?"

"It would be better if the person tells you directly. That way you could also ask if there's another door," he said.

"Oh, that makes sense," I said.

He took a sip of his cup and that's when I realized I had one in front of me, too. When did the barista come to take our order, talk less of dropping it for us? I didn't notice that.

I drew my brows together in confusion.

"Kai, did you order this?" I asked, and he stopped sipping to look at me.

"I thought you ordered it before I came. Didn't you see the barista drop it?" he asked.

"No. I'm only realizing now," I said and flashed a wary look at my cup.

"In case you're wondering, it's hot chocolate, and it tastes good," he said and continued sipping.

I had no issues with hot chocolate, so I took the sup, but after one sip, the world around me contorted until I was back in high school.

*******

I dropped the folded white shirt on my bed as I turned to where Lilly stood, looking between the two dresses in her hands. The annual winter ball was approaching, and she couldn't pick between the red sleeveless dress and the pink off-shoulder dress.

"I'm glad we've put aside our differences. It feels good to have it off me. I've never even told my girls all that I shared with you," she said with her eyes fixed on the red dress, which was turning out by every second to be her most likely choice.

"I'm glad too. But at least they still talk to you. Naomi and I haven't spoken for almost a week now. Kai says I should be the bigger person and go up to her, but I don't want to. Am I a terrible friend for that?" I asked, but still went on.

"I mean, she just doesn't get that. I don't want to talk about Mariana. She keeps thinking I'm going through something that I can't express, but she doesn't understand that this might just be my way of dealing with this whole situation."

Lilly's eyes were now on the pink dress as she said, "You're dealing with it by not talking about it."

"Exactly."

"If she's truly your friend, she would understand," she said, and I could hear the judgment in her tone. Guess she hadn't given that up yet.

"Lilly," I warned. "What did we say about snide comments?"

"Fine, fine, I'm working on it, okay?" She sighed before setting the two dresses down in exasperation. Her eyes sparkling with mirth met mine when she said, "It's difficult to suddenly be friends again with someone who abandoned me."

I let out a light chuckle. "I didn't abandon you, I—"

"Yeah, yeah. But hear me out. I think you should talk to Naomi. Even though I don't like her that much, I get her point and where she's coming from. You guys just need better communication to understand each other. It worked for us, didn't it?"

I was quiet as I mulled over what she said.

"You don't have to take it to heart though, it's just my opinion and after all, everyone has opinions on everything. Now I need your opinion on which dress looks better," she said before rambling about the pros and cons of both dresses and how the lighting in the hall was a major reason for her confusion while I just sat there still stunned that we were once again friends.

If I'd known all it would take was an apology to her, I guess I would have done that sooner. But her words rang true. Maybe better communication would help Naomi and me.

*******

What the heck just happened?

My eyes shot open and I gasped for air with my chest heaving as if I had just emerged from underwater. As my vision cleared to reveal Kai hovering over me, I realized I was on my back.

"Clara! Are you okay? How do you—"

"She's awake," someone shouted from above me and many relieved sighs followed their declaration.

I sat up, eyes darting around to see that we were still at the cafe.

"What... what happened?" I asked and saw some people around, worry etched on their features.

"Should we still call the ambulance? I was about to," a woman said.

"Do you feel fine? Should we call the ambulance?" Kai repeated the woman's question as his eyes moved in a frantic motion, searching for any signs of discomfort.

"No, no need. I'm fine," I said, and another man relayed this to the lady who must have asked.

People started returning to their seats as Kai helped me up.

"A bit of advice, dear," the man started. Once my eyes settled on him, a wave of familiarity descended upon me.

He had long black hair that fell to his shoulders and his bright blue jacket was a contrast to the black or darker-colored jackets almost everyone wore. I'm sure I'd seen him somewhere. I just couldn't remember where.

"Don't go doing things you shouldn't and worrying about things that are more than your capacity. Looks to me like you're under a lot of emotional stress. You should rest and always do like you're told," he said and turned to leave.

As he sauntered out, my eyes noticed how similar the blue of his jacket was to the blue on the table.

It sounded like perfectly normal advice a concerned elder would give a teenager, but I just couldn't shake off the feeling that the statement held some underlying meaning.

"Do you know him?" Kai asked.

I would have said, 'I'd never seen him in my life' but that felt like a lie, considering the familiarity he brought with him. My brain was reaching for a memory that kept dancing out of its grasp. So I said, "No."

"Do you wanna get out of here?"

"Yes."

When we got out, I couldn't help but notice that the man wasn't nearby. We came out seconds after he left and couldn't spot him anywhere. A question soon replaced the thought.

Was that a vision?

During the first chance, the visions I had were memories of my past. This one, however, was definitely not my past. Lilly and I were never that close, unless...

It seemed to be after we had reconciled because we were talking about Naomi and preparing for the annual winter ball.

But why would I have a memory of that?

I had a lot of questions, but there was one my brain kept on repeating.

What the heck was in that cup?

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It took a while to convince Kai not to take me to the hospital since he drove in his uncle's car. This made the drive back home a quiet and terse one. He kept readjusting his grip on the wheel and his eyes hadn't once met mine, even though I'd stared at him for most of the time. And I knew he knew I was staring. Yet he didn't say a word.

When we turned onto my street, his lips parted and I anticipated his words, but they never came. I sighed in exasperation, unable to withstand the growing tension, so I broke it with my words.

"Just say what's on your mind."

He hesitated. "Are you sure we shouldn't head to the hospi—"

"Kai c'mon, we've gone through this. I'm fine. You should ask me what I felt."

"You were unconscious and your pulse was slow. What would you have been feeling?"

"A vision," I said, and he whiplashed to me, eyes narrowing in confusion.

"You were feeling a vision?" he asked and my palm met my forehead as his confusion made me weary.

My voice was light with mirth when I said, "You'd think that since I was the one who fainted, I'd be having a slow time comprehending things."

His voice came out tight when he said, "I'm just... worried."

As we drove on, the pointed black roof of my house stood out as the highest of all the houses on the street.

"You worry about a lot of things."

"But you—"

"I'm fine. I just had the weirdest experience," I said as he pulled up into my driveway that Dad and Tony had cleared of snow that morning.

"What did you see?"

"Lilly and I were discussing, and we were friendly, back in the dorm, I guess."

"Oh," he said, not sounding as surprised as I thought he would.

I frowned, and my lips formed a pout. "You say oh like you knew."

"Well, you and Lilly started talking after the whole incident. You were on speaking terms again."

"So I just had a vision of the aftermath of my first chance," I said, and silence followed my declaration.

"What do you think this means?" he asked.

"I don't know. I mean, in the first chance, I was having visions of memories that happened in my real life."

"So, does this mean that this talk actually happened in your real life?"

"It couldn't have. In my real life, we've graduated. Lilly and I never sorted out our issues, thus we never became friends and Mariana never got expelled for stabbing me." I said, my voice breaking at the end.

"This can't be real, can it?" I asked and looked at Kai, the question that has been plaguing me since this all started. He still looked shaken, but his gaze was hard on the house ahead.

"I hate to say it, but it feels real to me. It feels like one day you started behaving weirdly and then you told me about your quest and how you need to get out, and out of nowhere, Mariana stabs you. You still manage to open the door, but you don't disappear through it, you just pass out.

"Then after weeks in the hospital, you come back and you don't want to talk about it with anyone, and that's fine. We go on a break. I beg my dad to let me stay here with my uncle for the holidays so we can talk about how you feel. But you say you're in your past again and I'm thinking crazy because I'm coming up with a stupid theory of two doors when I don't know what the f**k I'm doing and then you just pass out and scare the s**t out of me. Then this odd guy comes with his odd advice. And you say you had a vision of something that hasn't happened and I can't help but think it's all crazy and messed up." he finally ended his rant with his chest heaving and his breaths filling the silence.

My eyes couldn't move from his side profile, and he refused to meet mine. His description from the beginning was perfect. Perfectly normal. Except that it made me realize one truth.

I shouldn't have told him.

I shouldn't have said anything. He didn't deserve to deal with all this because he had feelings for me. Because I trusted him.

I was so scared that he would meet the same fate as Mrs. Morris, or worse, that I didn't stop to think how crazy this would all sound to someone living a perfectly normal life. I knew he said this was all crazy, but I couldn't help but feel that he meant I was crazy.

And maybe I was.

It was normal as it could be for him before I ever said anything to him. Maybe that real life I keep thinking about wasn't real. I mean, what proof did I have except for Perry, Mrs. Morris, and the weird, unexplainable visions I was having? Maybe I was sick and something had messed up with my brain. Maybe I—

"Clara," I heard the gulp that followed as loud as banging drums. "I shouldn't have said—"

"No. I shouldn't have said this to you. Any of this. I shouldn't have dragged you into this. I didn't stop to think twice or even once about how this could affect you and I just hauled you in."

My eyes couldn't meet his as I muttered a sorry once again, feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt and embarrassment at how selfish I was. I claimed my feelings for Kai were genuine, yet I didn't once care for how all this would feel to him.

I pushed the door open and stomped out with the crunch of snow beneath my boots as my sole companion throughout the lone walk. I barely registered how I took my boots and jacket off as I headed up to my room with one fact hovering over my head.

He didn't follow me.

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Phew! Kai really held in a lot. He had reached his limit. I think he needs more time to understand everything Clara has been saying. What do you think and what would you have done, if you were in Kai's shoes?

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The Sparkling Authoress
Mis. A

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