That’s part of what I like about the book in some ways. It portrays death truthfully. You die in the middle of your life, in the middle of a sentence. ~ John Green, The Fault In Our Stars.

Song of the chapter : Bhare Naina by Nandini Srikar.

***

The next moments pass in a blur and then Ekansh is placed on a stretcher as the doctors hurry inside.

"Ekansh please aankhe kholo. Tum darro mat ha. Abhi bass tum thik ho jaaoge" I cry holding his hand tightly.

His face is so badly bruised that all I can see is blood. The blood is not stopping and I am on the verge of getting a panic attack.

They take him inside the operation theatre and the nurse closes the door on my face.

I place my head on the closed doors as my legs threaten to give up underneath me.

Let him be okay.. please..

"Bahot blood loss hua hai unka. Teen haddiyaan toot gayi hai aur skull me bhi swelling hai. I don't think he'll make it but we'll try our best" the doctor says and goes inside.

I go and slump down on a chair and look at my shaking hands that are now red.

Khoon. Ekansh ka khoon. Because of me. Ye tune kya kar diya, Avni?

Bile rises in my throat and I run towards the washroom and throw up all the contents of my stomach.

Kyu gayi mai vo raste pe? Kyu maine aaju baju nahi dekha? Kyu maine phone uthaya? Kyu kyu kyu?!

I wash my hands vigorously, like I'm trying to rip off my own skin and cry. Meri galti ki saza Ekansh ko. Kyu?

I somehow stumble outside and see that there are now more people outside the operation theatre.

Ekansh ki family.

I've never met anyone before but Ekansh se bahot sunaa hai inke baare me. He stays in a joint family. Teen saal se itni baate sunn ke I can recognise them very well.

The old man and old lady sitting in a corner are his dada dadi and the little girl beside them is his youngest cousin, Chanchal.

His mom is crying on his dad's shoulder and tears roll down my cheeks. There is another elder couple who I assume to be his chacha chachi and their elder daughter, Devika are talking about something.

I slowly walk forward and his mom is the first one to look at me.

Her eyes light up with fire once she sees me. Just by her expression I know that she knows. She dashes towards me and slaps me right across my face. Hard.

I'm about to fall when two strong hands hold my shoulders and jerk me up. I look up to see Hriday glaring down at me in rage.

"Stop it Mugdha!" His dad comes towards us and pulls her away from me. "I'm sorry beta" he says as my hands move towards my face and I cry in them.

"Dad aap sorry mat bolo. Issi ke wajah se Ekansh ki ye haalat hai. Issi ne-"

"Bass karo Hriday!" a gentle hand settles on my shoulder and I look up to see his dadaji looking at me in concern.

"Jo bhi hua vo bass ek haadsa tha. Aur vo Ekansh ka faisla tha. Ye wakt pe ek dusre ko doshi tehraane se achha hai ke ek hum ek dusre ke saath rahe" his daadi says and I wipe my tears.

I see his chacha chachi and Devika give me angry looks and I quickly look down.

I sit in one of the corner seats and my eyes fall on the murthi of Ganpati Bappa in a distance. Daadi and chachi are sitting there, praying.

Bhagwan se vishwas tab hi uth gaya tha jab vo mere baba ko mujhse dur le gaye.

Agar aap ho Bhagwan ji, toh please Ekansh ko kuch mat hone do. Vo ek bahot achha ladka hai. Aur baba kehte the ke achhe logo ke saath achha hi hota hai.

If you want take my life, spare his.

"Didi?" I see Chanchal tapping her little hand on my knee. "Aapke sarr se khoon aa raha hai" she says pointing towards my forehead.

I touch my forehead and wince. There's a bruise and a bump has formed. That's when I see that my leggings are torn near the knee and they are scrapped. My palms are in the same condition because of the fall.  The small stones on the road have pierced me through the skin.

"Koi baat nahi, Chanchal. Apne aap thik ho jaayega" I tell her.

"Aapko mera naam kaise pata?" She asks as her mouth forms a little 'o'.

"Ekansh bahot baat karta tha aapke baare me" I say as my eyes fill with tears again.

The door opens to the operation theatre and we all rush towards the doctor.

"We're really sor-"

Hriday grabs his collar and slams him against the wall.

"Don't you dare!" He sneers at him as his dad pulls him back and the doctor starts coughing.

"His organs are failing slowly. Vo hosh me hai abhi. You can go say.. goodbye" he says and walks away.

My body, mind, everything goes numb. This can't be happening. No no no.

"Vo pehle apne dada dadi se baat karna chahte hai akele me" the nurse says when she comes out.

They both go inside and after a few minutes they call us.

Everybody rushes inside and I drag my legs to him. How am I going to show him my face? How am I going to say goodbye?

When I look at him, my heart squeezes in pain. He has so many needles in his skin and his face has lost all his colour. His face is badly bruised and his body looks much smaller in this big room.

The heartbeat monitor is beeping steadily and the smell of antiseptics starts making me nauseous.

I stand in the corner of the room, too ashamed and hurt to go face him. To look at him in this condition.

"Ekansh?" His mother whispers softly and he slowly opens his eyes. I put my hand on my mouth to swallow the sobs.

"I'm.. fine, maa" he says and his mom breaks down in tears. She sobs loudly as his father starts crying too.

"Chacha chachi kyu ro rahe hai?" Chanchal asks and I sob harder. "Bhai ko ab sona hai. Hum kal fir aayenge unhe dekhne thik hai?" Her dad tells her.

"Good night bhai. Sweet dreams" she says and kisses him on his cheek and her dad takes her out of the room. His chachi places her head on his chest and starts crying.

"Chachi please" Ekansh breathes out. "Devika ko mo- model banne dena. Vo bahot achhi model banegi" he says looking at Devika as she goes and hugs him.

"Aapne mujhe promise kiya tha ke aap mujhe car chalana sikhaaoge" she cries.

"I know darling"

"Nahi nahi nahi" she screams. "You promised bhai. Mujhe kuch nahi pata bass. Mujhe kuch nahi pata aap utho" she cries loudly.

"Devika" Ekansh lifts his hand slowly and wipes her tears. "I'm sorry. But you're going to be okay".

Then his eyes search the room and land on Hriday.

"Bhai?" He says in a hoarse voice and Hriday steps forward. "What are you crying like a pu- pussy?" he says and they both laugh through their tears. It's their inside joke I guess.

"I'm sorry" Hriday says and Ekansh shakes his head.

"Mai aapse iss duniya me sabse- sabse jyada pyaar karta hu. Remember that always" he says and Hriday takes his hand as his tears fall on them.

"Avni" he calls out my name and I step forward.

"I'm sorry Ekansh" I say as my body shakes with the heavy sobs.

"Hey.. it's okay. I love you. Tum bhi mere liye yahi karti, hai na?" He asks and I nod.

"Bhai aap kuch bhul rahe ho" he says.

"Kya?"

"Meri aakhri ichha nahi puchoge?" He whispers and everyone in the room weeps harder.

"Pucho na. Avni, pucho" he says as tears roll down his eyes. "Please".

"Tumhari.. aakhri ich- ichha kya hai Ekansh?" I choke out the words.

He takes my hand and Hriday's hand and takes a deep breath.

"Meri aankhri ichha ye hai ke mai tum dono ko abhi issi wakt shadi karte hue dekhna chahta hu".

His voice echoes through the room and I feel like my heartbeat stops. The whole room goes silent and the only sound that can be heard is the beeping of his heart monitor which is slowly becoming faster.

Everybody in the room starts questioning him. I start panicking when I hear the beeps getting more fast.

"Fine" Hriday's voice cuts through the noise like a knife and I look at him.

He'd do it for his brother in a heartbeat. Hriday loves him just as much. I know agar Ekansh ye time pe unse kuch bhi maang leta toh vo usse de dete.

Aur mai?

I close my eyes when the room starts spinning before my eyes. All of this is too much, too fast.

"Lekin yaha kaise?" Hriday asks and I open my eyes to look at Ekansh.

He thinks for a while.

"Daadi ko mantra aate hai. Mujhe circle kar ke saath phere lo" he says and Hriday nods.

"Tumhare around kyu" I place my hand on his cheek.

"Fir hi tum dono ye saath phere nibhaaoge. Mai apne important hone ka pura faayda uthaaunga" he smiles.

Hriday forwards his hand for me to take but I just stare at it not knowing what to do. I look at his family members but nobody objects. He grabs my arm making me stand up forcefully.

"Ekansh agar chahta hai ke apni shadi ho toh apni shadi hogi. If he told me to kill you, I would even do that. The latter one more happily though" he whispers in my ear threateningly and I gulp.

Daadi starts with the mantra and Hriday holds my hand in a death grip and I just numbly follow him, my eyes not once leaving the face of Ekansh.

The sound of the heartbeat monitor over the mantras is making me dizzy.

What is the reason behind this?

As if he could hear the question, he answers me, "Tum dono ko baad me pata chalega. Tab you will thank me".

I wipe away my tears and Ekansh mouths a sorry to me.

"Mangalsutra aap baadme pehna dena bhai. Yaad se lekin. Aur Sindoor.." he looks around the room as his eyes fall on Hriday's hands.

"Aapke haath pehle se hi red hai bhai" he says and I look at his hands with Ekansh's blood.

I break into a fresh set of tears when Hriday's thumb brushes on my forehead. Goosebumps rise on my skin and I fist my hands as my nails dig painfully into my palms.

"Thank you" he says and I kiss his forehead.

"I love you more than anything" I tell him.

"Avni ka khayal rakhna. Aur tum bhai ka. Mai upar se nazar rakhunga, samjhe dono" he tells us breathlessly.

"Aur bhai?" He has now started struggling with his words as they barely come out. "You've fulfilled your promise to maa. You'll always be the Joey to my Chandler. I love you" he says and the beeping sound comes to a still as his eyes close.

It rings in my ear as everyone in the room starts crying and I just stare at him.

I just lost my life, in the literal sense.

Suddenly Hriday grabs me by the arm harshly and drags me out of the room.

"Kya kar rahe ho aap? Please chhodiye mujhe" I sob as his fingers dig into my flesh.

He opens a random door and pushes me inside. It's dark but I don't get to see anything as he directly comes and stands in front of me.

With a lot of courage, I look into his eyes. There are no more tears, but his eyes are bloodshot, his lashes damp.

"I hate you with every fibre of my being, Shravni Desai. Tum mere bhai ke maut ki zimmedaar ho" he says taking a threatening step forward.

Our faces are inches apart, our shallow breaths mingling together. I'm transfixed by his heated gaze.

"Maine kuch nahi-"

"Just shut up" he cuts me off and punches the wall right next to my face. I flinch and close my eyes tightly.

He grasps my chin harshly and makes me look at him. "Tumhari galti ke wajah se Ekansh marr gaya. And now you deserve to suffer. And the fact that you're my wife won't save you. It's going to be the opposite".

***

Just in two chapters I got so attached to Ekansh so I'm too emotional to write something more now. Thanks to all of you that are taking the time to read this. I promise it gets better later.. ily :)