Irene didn't know what to do or how to react, what she did know was that she needed fresh air. That she needed to get out of the building and away from all of them. Away from their thoughts and opinions on what they thought was the right move.

As they decided amongst themselves on something that they had no right to have opinions on.

But for the first time she couldn't find the words to voice her objections when normally they came so naturally.

So instead she ran. She ran like a coward, and she was never one to run away from a problem.

It was raining outside, and she couldn't help but wonder why it almost seemed to rain everyday in Gotham. All the separated Gotham and Metropolis was a large river and yet it always seemed sunny in Metropolis.

But for once Irene found herself grateful for the ran as she began to walk down the road. It almost felt like the rain was helping her clear her thoughts.

"Irene." Bruce called out but she felt like the walls were caving in around her. She had to leave. Nothing made sense, and she could feel herself begin to panic as her heart began to beat more rapidly in her chest. "Irene."

As he said her name he got a hold of her arm causing her to stop as he pulled her closer.

"Let go of me Bruce."

He did. Instantly. Almost like if she had burned him. Even he seemed a little confused.

"You can't be serious about this." Irene finally said after a long moment of silence. They had just been staring at each other waiting for the other to speak first, but clearly he knew better than to do it first knowing that he would say something wrong.

"Do you not want Clark back?"

The question caused a small gasp to leave her lips. How could he ever ask something like that?

Of course she wanted him back. She needed him back. Every morning she woke up hoping that everything had just been a nightmare. That he wasn't dead, and that he was sleeping peacefully beside her.

"Of course I want him back." Irene replied feeling the tears building up in her eyes. "But not like this. Not when we don't know the consequences."

"I know how much you need him Irene. When I first met you, you had a spark. That spark... it's diminished." He stated firmly though he seemed to be struggling to find the right words. Or maybe he was afraid of saying that wrong ones. "I meant what I said. The world needs you. Needs that words that you have to say."

Irene had never heard Bruce speak so much. When he spoke he only ever said what was necessary for any occasion, never bothering with meaningless conversation to fill awkward silences. So Irene couldn't help but feel a little speechless over everything he had just told her.

She didn't know he thought so highly of her. She had always assumed that he felt some kind of obligation to her. That his guilt over Clark was why he had insisted on her going back to work or helping him find the meta-humans even though she knew he was more than capable of doing it himself.

"You've said you need me but that's not true." She countered as she pushed wet strands of hair from her face.

"All of us coming together wouldn't have been possible without you."

"We both know that you were more than capable of finding them on your own." Irene countered having thought about it multiple times already. Bruce Wayne was always one of the smartest people in the room, she realized that now. That his goal all along had been to try to make her to what she loved again, to not let her lose herself in her grief. "You pretended that you needed me to help me. I see that now. And thank you, but I can't be involved in this anymore."

He looked at her like a puzzle that needed to be solved. He didn't understand why she was acting this way, and maybe she didn't either. "Why are you against this."

"Bruce I'm pregnant." Irene found herself saying needing him to get the full picture of what she felt. Of why she was so hesitant.

Bruce looked at her as if she had just slapped him across the face. He was surprised, which meant that Alfred hadn't told him.

He quickly recovered from his initial shock though as he became serious. "Then shouldn't that make this decision easier?"

Irene felt at a loss of words. A couple of days ago she had gone to him with the intention of telling him about the nightmare she had. About how it didn't make sense and how it scared her.

"A couple of nights ago I had this dream... it was more of a nightmare." She started knowing that he was probably going to think that she was losing her mind. Maybe she she was. "There was this apocalyptic world. You, Barry, Kara and others were all dead. Superman killed you all. I had this nightmare before I even knew Kara existed existed. Tell me how is that possible?"

Bruce remained quiet for what felt like an eternity before taking a step closer to her, his voice low as he spoke. Almost like they were sharing a secret. "I... I've had similar nightmares."

Now it was Irene's turn to be stunned silent. But in that shock there was also relief, because if Bruce was having similar dreams then it meant that she wasn't crazy.

"What if something goes wrong when you try to bring Clark back?" Irene questioned, finally understanding why she was against it. If she allowed herself to be impulsively selfish and something went wrong what did that mean for the future? But it wasn't her future that she was worried about, it was the future of the child that was now growing inside of her. "What bringing him back just leads to what happened in those nightmares?"

Irene never got the chance to hear what Bruce intended to say as Jimmy approached them.

"Irene you're going to get sick." Jimmy called out as he wrapped her coat around her shoulders. He looked between Irene and Bruce with uncertainty before tugging on her arm. "Let's go."

Irene and Jimmy had picked up some late night Chinese food before he dropped her off at her apartment. They had been mostly silent since the ferry ride from Gotham, the weight of knowing there was a possibility that Clark could come back was heavy.

And Irene felt emotionally and physically exhausted by everything. Some part of her just wanted to lay in bed and cry for hours.

"What if I'm wrong Jimmy?" Irene questioned softly as she moved the food around on the plate with her fork. "What if they can bring him back?"

Jimmy hadn't voiced his opinion on the subject, most likely because he was afraid of how she would react. Or maybe he wasn't entirely sure what he believed. But he was silent now as he finally looked up from his plate to meet Irene's eyes.

"And what if you're right?" He said instead and Irene knew that this hurt him too. Clark had been one of his best friends. "If he doesn't come back as himself and ends up hurting people... Clark would have never wanted that."

He was right of course. The reason why he had sacrificed himself to begin with was to make sure that no one got hurt by Doomsday. If they tried to bring him back and something went wrong, then his sacrifice would have been for nothing.

Clark would have wanted her to continue being strong. Irene had failed completely at that. The truth was that she had completely lost herself, and she didn't want that to be the case anymore.

"Jimmy you were taking pictures of the team weren't you?" Irene asked feeling as something clicked into place. She hadn't felt that kind of inspiration and urge to write a story in a very long time.

She had almost forgotten what that drive felt like.

He almost looked offended by the question as he placed a hand on the camera sitting by his plate of food. "Of course I was."

Irene nodded slowly weighing whether or not she could even return to work. Or if it was a good idea to even publish the story that was coming together in her head. "How do you feel about being a co-writer with me on a story?"

Jimmy smiled, and it was a kind of boyish smile that Irene hadn't seen from him in a long time. "I thought you'd never ask."

For the first time Irene felt a slight sense of normalcy. That even with everything that was going on with Steppenwolf and Darkseid that at least one part of her life felt normal again.

That the idea of going back to work and doing what she loved again brought her some sense of joy.

For a couple of hours as she and Jimmy started working on the story that they planned on presenting to Perry the next day.

But even after Jimmy had gone home later that night sleep was the farthest thing from Irene's mind. She didn't know where her mind was or how to sort everything out.

Irene wasn't even sure what she was doing as she got some cardboard boxes out from the closet. They were the boxes that Clark had used when he had moved into her apartment.

It made what she was doing so much harder? But she knew that it needed to be done.

She removed the red flannel jacket from the hanger, it had always been Clark's favorite. It was old and there was a hole on the sleeve, but that had never mattered to him even when Irene had told him it was time to get a new one.

Bringing the jacket up to her face Irene inhaled the lingering scent. It was the scent of freshly cut grass, even when living in a big city like Metropolis he always seemed to carry Smallville wherever he went.

She couldn't control the tears that went down her cheeks as she packed away all his things. It was hard to let go, but it was something that she had to do. She had given herself enough time to mourn him.

Maybe if she wasn't pregnant she would have let herself drown in her grief. But that wasn't the case. It wasn't just her anymore. Irene now had something more to live for and she wasn't going to mess it up.

Irene knew that she would never be able to move on from Clark Kent. He had been everything, and what she had told Diana remained true. She knew that she would never love anyone else again.

She going that she was okay with that. Irene had found that epic love that they wrote about in books, and she may have lost Clark but nothing could take away all the memories he gave her. Some people never find that kind of love, and she had. Even if it had been cut short.

And for the first in almost four months Irene felt some peace at the thought.

A/N: Only seven more chapters to go! Really excited for these last few because there's still so many fun moments left to write. Expect them to all be pretty long chapters.