i feel on the brink of a panic attack and that doesn't spark joy but it's my own fault for not being able to keep up with school

but i wanna think about other things so,, my sister got a tattoo today. it's a little sun on her ankle and her best friend got a matching moon,, and it reminded me of how much i want to do that too

it's probably impossible, because my best friend would need to know and like shadowhunters, and agree to getting a matching tattoo with me, but it's a nice thought to think about. it's highkey basic but i truly do think of her as my parabatai,, my love for her goes beyond friendship, but it's not romantic at all,, she's my soulmate, my other half, and i would literally die for her with no hesitation. parabatai is the best word i've found to describe our relationship, and a part of me has always wanted to "make it official" in some way jsbhskdkghd so yeah it's probably the most basic thing i've ever thought about but who cares about basic if i found someone who makes me feel like that

to summarise: i really love my best friend :(💕💖❤💗💞