Hello people!!!❤️❤️❤️

How are you doing?

This is my first Wattpad story, so please don't be too hard on me 🥺

Recommendations
1. If you see any grammar mistakes please let me know to correct them ✅
2. If you like the chapter please let me know with a vote ⭐️ or a comment
3. Constructive criticism is really helpful
4. I RECOMMEND TO READ ONE CHAPTER PER DAY (especially for those who like a little bit of drama) 😉
5. NO SPOILERS!!!

Love ya all💞

***

Self-reflection

Ever since I remember I always dreamed of falling in love, getting married, and being a mother. In other words, having the perfect family. A loving husband who is spiritual, smart, and attractive. Someone who can see through me, who I can trust, who is with me through the uncertainty of life.

I also had the American dream (transmitted by my mother), I wanted to live in the US, meet a handsome American, and marry him to become a US citizen. Therefore, whenever I saw an American I would get super excited and try to talk to him/her with my best English. I loved learning English, to the point I valued it more than my native tongue. Whenever there was a family trip to the US I would get super excited and imagine my future self living there with my handsome spouse and my beautiful children.

However, I'm almost 24, and instead of finding my perfect American boyfriend in college, I am still single and wondering when will I meet the guy for me. I'm aware there are millions of men and women going through the same situation, but what makes it hard for me is that there's someone who is living my dream, the exact way I imagined it to be, and that's my younger sister.

When we were both in the single zone we were very close, she was my favorite person I fully trusted her and even though we had our issues, overall we were very close.

Envy and jealousy, are two capital sins that can completely destroy you if you let them take over you, but they are also so common and hard to avoid, they are part of human nature. Living in a fallen world is tough, where nothing is certain and a single event can change your life forever, hence it is completely normal to be afraid.

Fear is a horrible feeling, but in small quantities, it can be useful for survival. Nonetheless, living in fear is not nice; the fear of losing something dear to you and the fear of never having something you always wanted is what we call jealousy and envy, which can lead to your downfall. For instance, Anakin Skywalker one of my favorite fictional characters and my biggest platonic crush was consumed by jealousy (fear of losing Padme like he lost his mother), which led to severe permanent injuries (losing all his limbs and being completely burned), losing his reputation and all his friends/allies. But worst of all he lost the love of his life.

I've been envious of my sister before, she's always been the better athlete and the better student. People praise her intellect and her beauty, she's normally surrounded by lots of friends, which makes her look like some sort of popular kid. With her high self-esteem and her ambitious goals she seems to be Miss Perfect, she's ready for success and she's determined to get whatever she wants. I mean, I struggled a little bit with my envious thoughts back then, but visualizing idealistic future versions of her and I would help me calm down by thinking we could both be happy and successful and share our joys together!

But now she's living the American Romantic Dream while I'm watching her on my own, having all I ever wanted. However, even if I can't control my envy & even if I go crazy, I would never do anything to ruin her happiness since that's not right & deep inside I love her. Besides, even if I was selfish and didn't care about my sister at all; I know this is God's will and he's all powerful and all mighty, so even if I tried to ruin her dream with all my might, I could end up like Anakin, losing everything I have, or even worse, going to a place where no human soul would find peace for eternity.

Therefore, I must kill these thoughts, emotions, and feelings that desperately want to find a young perfect college guy who would satisfy all my current desires. I know I can't do this on my own, so I need the strength that comes from the heavens, the type of strength that only comes from God and makes you do, think, or act in a way you never thought you could.

So, Dear Lord I know you are the one who truly understands me, you've seen my past and my present and you can read and remember all my thoughts. Henceforth, if it is your will please give me a man who I can spend the rest of my days with, but if not give me the strength to stay single and say "It is well with my soul".

January 7th of 2026

"So Mathew, as specified in Title II of the Sarbanes Oxley Act, which of the following non-audit services to audit clients are not prohibited from being performed by a registered public accounting firm if the pre-approved by the audit committee and disclosed to the SEC?" - asked professor Roland, one of our university accounting teachers.

-"Tax services, because according to SOX Title II, internal audit outsourcing services, management functions, legal services and other services unrelated to the audit are all prohibited"- replied Mathew confidently.

He and most of my classmates were like that studious, smart, and responsible, put differently, they were nerds. I didn't dislike being in an environment like that, but I can't deny it was way more challenging than school. I always felt like smarty pants till I started college, especially at the graduate level. My schoolmates used to constantly ask me for help, high school and college were more the other way.

"I want you to choose one partner to work on these sheets I'm giving you. You have to examine a company's financial statements and each pair has different information. So, don't talk too much because I'll take them at the end of the class"- those instructions immediately got me out of my thoughts.

I didn't know who to choose, my friend Laila already got with Jessica and Mike obviously got with his beloved girlfriend. But there was a part of me that wanted to work with this guy... I didn't know his name...

Short messy brown hair, green olive eyes, light brown skin, tall, slim body... Lina! Why do you always daydream about a different guy every day? But with him it was different, it was like some sort of spiritual connection.

Some part of me thought he felt it too, I'll never forget yesterday's "staring contest" we kept looking at each other for no reason! Or at least that's how it felt for me.

"Hey there"- I turned to see him and I was shocked! There was a part of me that couldn't believe this was actually happening.

"H-hey"- I replied, stammering.

"Mind if we work together?"- he said with a smirk.

"No, not at all"- he sat beside me and we both set our minds on the auditing sheets, which were pretty complex, so we didn't have time to waste.

"Five more minutes"- said Professor Roland, I didn't worry since we were almost done with the verification.

"We did it"

"Yeah, we make a good team"- he answered, with a cute smile. Oh my, I really like this boy.

The bell rang for lunchtime, and my friend Laila was about to invite me to eat lunch with her new friend till she realized I was with my "crush" (I didn't want her to know that, but she always found a way to bring to light my deepest secrets)

"What's your name?"

"Lina Días, and yours?"

"Jordan Brown"- that name suits him so well! -" I am happy to meet someone as smart as you, I would like to know you better"- I felt my cheeks getting hotter, why was he so relaxed while I was so nervous?

"That would be great, I mean I would like to know you as well"- he smiled, which made my face feel even hotter.

Suddenly I heard a stomach growling noise -"How'd you feel about grabbing lunch together?"

"Right now? Sure! You must be hungry"- we walked together to Midtown Cafeteria, the University's best and most high-cost Cafeteria. Part of me sensed he might invite me, what a gentleman!

As we were walking to our destination we talked about our careers and hobbies. He liked playing basketball, reading historical books, and playing video games. Uh, I hoped he was not obsessed with video games like my cousin Francisco, there was not a day he didn't play video games!

He bought a double beef burger, French fries, and a Coca-Cola, while I bought just a simple burger (I wasn't very hungry and I expected him to invite me)

"You're just ordering a cheeseburger? I can buy you something else if you want"

"No, don't worry I'm not very hungry, but thanks"

"Are you sure?"- he said in a worried tone, he was so perfect!

"I'm sure"- I replied confidently as we sat down.

"Are you close to your brother?"- I asked after catching a glimpse of his Lock Screen.

"Yes! We try to FaceTime at least once every week. He just started high school, so he's been a little moody the past few days."

"I feel that the transition to high school is never easy"

"Very true, especially senior year when you have to make the decision of whether to go to college or not"

"And choosing a career is another tough decision since it's what you'll work on for the rest of your life" - I said as I nervously played with the buttons of my left cuff.

His stare fell on my hands, so I stopped what I was doing. -"Not necessarily, for instance, my grandfather has a Bachelor's in Mechanical Engineering but he later decided to become the successor of his cousin's company. He's the CEO of a telecommunications firm."

We continued talking about our careers and how we ended up at SPU. I gave him some tips since I've been there far longer than he has.

"What are your plans for the future?"- he asked hesitantly. That question had always freaked me out, I had so many mixed ideas in my head and I was still unsure of what I wanted. I constantly prayed to God to make the right decisions.

"Graduate from Southeastern Pentecostal University, get a job, travel a little, I don't know, and what about you?"

"Administrate my grandfather's church and hopefully other churches"-his voice was so firm and strong that I didn't doubt for a second what he said.

"That's great! I'm sure your grandfather's church will grow more when you administrate it"- he chuckled, that dashing smile!

I felt each minute intensified the feelings I had for him.

"I hope so. I'll work hard and try to follow God's plan"

"That's what every Christian should do"

"You're right, only God knows what's best for each one of us"- Jordan was wonderful! Lively spirit, ambitious soul, and healthy body.

I had the feeling this was the man God had for me.

***

Hello again!!!❤️❤️❤️

I hope you liked it 🤞

How do you imagine Jordan Brown? 🤔