Hanamiya Makoto's thoughts..

Opening your eyes in the morning and then instantly seeing the person you love beside you in bed, that's the moment you're going to find yourself most appreciative of life.

I love it when every morning I wake up, Nadeshiko's face is the first thing that I'll see. It's just wonderful.

No. It's perfect.

The sun hasn't fully risen yet but the room was bathed in that lightened color that made it almost seem to be anxiously awaiting the sun's rays. It was a morning filled with utmost serenity. It was the morning after our wedding day.

To be specific, it was our honeymoon.

I felt so many things as I laid in between mussed sheets and warm skin---things that were filling up my heart with content and happiness. And it was all because of my wife beside me, laying sound asleep.

A gentle smile crept into my face as I stared at her sleeping face.

"I love you," I whispered even though I knew she couldn't hear it. But it didn't really matter, whether she could hear me or not, I would never hesitate to tell her how much I love her. On and on. I would never get tired.

Funny, yeah.

I was like that before, a jerk who wavers when it comes to love and any other emotional matters. But that was before I realized that losing someone you love, someone you love so much, because of your own stupid acts is painful. So very painful.

All those times that she was not with me, all those times that she was ignoring me, every fucking time she wouldn't even talk or look at me -- it was emotional torture, psychological even. Regret and misery would visit me every night like a phantom haunting me in the dark and even in my dreams.

Series of what if's and I should have's consumed me every fucking hour of my life. What if I was strong enough to show her what I truly felt? What if I came running after her that day she turned her back on me? What if I was not stupid enough to actually let her go? I should have told her how much she meant to me back then.

That my world just can't be right without her in my life.

Thinking about it again, a lump suddenly formed deep in my throat. I protectively wrapped my arm around her waist and held her close to my bare chest. I didn't know why but whenever I think about the possibility of losing her again, my chest would tighten... As if literally crushing my heart from within.

With all the unpleasant thoughts lingering inside my head, I didn't realize that my grip on her was getting tighter. And she stirred.

"M-Makoto? What's wrong?" she mumbled in a lazy tone and then wrapped her arm around my waist too. She didn't open her eyes and just nuzzled her head closer.

She was never a morning person. In fact, she was lazy. I remembered her getting into a lot of trouble with our teacher because of her tardiness back in our first year of high school when we were still in the same class. All the pouts, the sheepish smiles, and the insincere apologies she would give to our teacher back then were just too adorable. I would always try my hardest to contain my smiles then by holding a book up to my face, pretending to not pay attention. But to be honest, every tiny piece of my attention was focused on her. Only her.

I chuckled softly at the memory then sighed. "Nothing. I had a bad dream."

"Then why are you laughing? Idiot."

"Don't mind me, babe. Just continue your sleep," I cooed, grinning at the way she mocked me. Idiot had been my favorite word, but now it had become my middle name too because of her.

Oh, the things you endure for love.

"Okay, I'm so tired. You were rough last night." She yawned then grew still and silent. I knew she was already off to dreamland again.

I planted a soft kiss on her nose, the gentle smile never once leaving my face.

Last night was a bliss, one of the best nights of my life. I had taken her in the best way that I could because the last time that we made love was a year and six months ago---the time when Ryuzaki was formed.

A year and six months.

I missed her so badly. So so so badly. But I held back myself, I promised to myself not to do it until the day we exchange our marriage vows.

I'm ashamed of myself. Really.

I love Nadeshiko so much, and yet I tainted her. I should've waited. I should've controlled myself so that I could give her the perfect wedding, the perfect honeymoon, and our perfect first time for sexual intercourse. But since I couldn't turn back time, and turning back time would only mean denying Ryuzaki which I couldn't possibly do, I just focused on making up for my mistakes. I held back all of my sexual urges. It was hard. Literally hard, even. If you know what I mean.

Nadeshiko, despite giving birth to our son, remained beautiful and sexy and perfect. All those tantrums and hormonal fits she threw at me when she was still pregnant, they were just insecurities of a woman entangled with frustrations and stress and well, insecurity. But I understood her though, I understood what she was going through. And I meant what I said about her being the only girl in the entire galaxy worthy enough of my attention.

She's simply the only one for me.

Suddenly, I remembered my little angel -- my seven months old son, Ryuzaki. I missed him. But since there was no way we could bring him to our honeymoon, we left him at home with his uncles and aunts and grandparents who would always go out of control whenever he was around. But I knew they just love him a whole lot so they're always excited.

And besides, I wanted to have his mother all to myself even for just a few days.

Suddenly, all too suddenly, the memory of last night came alive inside my mind. It made my usually brilliant brain fizzle out and became clouded---clouded like the rain clouds that hang far overhead and drizzle down water to the earth's crust. The fact that we were both completely bare under the sheets didn't help too. I groaned.

Nadeshiko is still sore. Keep that in mind, Hanamiya Makoto.

Once again, I groaned..

and groaned..

..and groaned.

Damn.

I heaved a very deep sigh and closed my eyes for a moment, soaking up the peace that fluttered over the room. Then my mind cleared up almost immediately. Taking a solemn breath, I opened my eyes again and stared at her face.

Minutes slip by and the sun began an early arch into the room, stretching soft clouded shadows over the floor. Nadeshiko was breathing out evenly, eyes fluttered close, some of her blonde locks were covering her beautiful eyes.

Such a beautiful sight.

I didn't know how I ended up being the person that I currently am, but one thing's for sure... For the first time in a long time, I felt utterly at peace. And it's because of Nadeshiko.

I will be forever thankful to God for creating a lovestory where a beautiful princess like her fell in love with an evil villain like me. I know, too cheesy. But that's love. It turns you into a person you never thought you could be.

Yesterday as she was walking down the aisle, I couldn't stop smiling. I was almost tearing up. She was my dream, and I would give up anything just to have her. Winning didn't even matter anymore, I already have the greatest prize ever.

If heaven could be one thing, it's Nadeshiko's love itself.

From the very first day that I saw her sitting two seats away from me in class, my heart trembled for the first time. Every time she would smile at me, greet me, walk past me, look at me... I knew I couldn't let her get away. I began harboring feelings of frustration, desperation.. love. I studied her every action, took pictures of her secretly, even followed her wherever she would go just to know her likes and dislikes. Hara being my teammate was a great help too. But as days went on, I realized I was getting nowhere. So I decided to confess to her and ended up being adamantly stupid. I didn't even get to tell her that I love her because every time that I'd try to, my nerves would get the best of me. But still, it turned out well enough. She became my girlfriend, yeah, because I left her with no choice.

Such an idiot I was.

However, stalking and admiring someone is a thing, but having that someone as your girlfriend is another thing. Her mere presense was enough to completely flip my world upside down. Every time we touch, I would grow speechless---which would frustrate me and I would end up ignoring her and calling her idiot even. What a stupid guy I was. I ended up losing her instead. She couldn't accept the basketball that I used to play. But it only made sense now, it was evil. And upon experiencing the grave consequences of it, I didn't even want to think about it anymore.

Damn.

I was a devil.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, carressing her soft cheek. Then I added, "Thank you so much."

Nadeshiko guided me into the right path, and I have no intention of straying away again.

She sighed out, mumbling softly beneath her breath and snuggled closer, her breath was now tickling my neck. Her leg moved to slide between mine and a noise left the back of my throat before I could stop it, denoting the sleepy pleasure that her proximity had brought. Fuck! But it wasn't enough, it never was, and I had to physically clench my fingers together to stop myself from touching her.

I didn't want to wake her up. She needed rest, needed it more than I needed intimacy. I would be selfish if I wake her up so early, especially after the wild night we both shared, and how late we ended up finally sleeping.

I was completely serious about letting her rest and I knew that if I stayed longer, temptation would fiercely call. So I gently unravel myself from her arms, slipping my pillow against her chest to give her something to hold onto.

I smiled when she gripped the pillow hard, burying her face into the soft fabric and letting out a sleepy sigh. A moment later, I searched for my pants, found it below the bedpost, and slipped it on. I kissed her softly on the forehead before silently leaving the bedroom.

I wanted to give my wife a proper morning with a proper breakfast. It was our first day as a married couple so I wanted it to be sweet and perfect. For her.

After brushing my teeth and washing my face, I proceeded to the kitchen. I was familiar with everything because after all, it was our own house. I had bought it using the money I earned for working part-time in our company for years. It was the house I've been eyeing ever since I knew Nadeshiko was pregnant. I decided to spend our first days as a couple in our new house since we couldn't take a long vacation somewhere overseas because of school. It would be tough for her since she had just resumed on her studies.

Last night, she was surprised when she saw my wedding gift -- which was the entire house itself. She didn't know anything about it after all, it was my secret.

I was glad she was happy.

When I knew she was carrying my child, I didn't know what to do at first. It was very unexpected that I even felt neauseous and sweated cold sweats. But then thinking about a family together with Nadeshiko made me happy and the thought of having a child excited me to bits. So I started saving all the money that I could, did well on school, and tried hard to improve in basketball. Everything for Nadeshiko and for our child. I wanted to become a better person. Better than what everyone thinks of me.

Better than the person that I once was.

For them. For my own family.

I just finished preparing an American breakfast with eggs and bacons and homemade pancakes, because I knew it's what she loves, when my peripheral vision caught sight of her at the entrance of the kitchen. She was yawning while tying her hair into a messy bun.

"Ohayou, Makoto," she greeted in her morning voice.

After placing the plate of pancakes down the table, I turned to her. "Ohayou, Mrs. Hanamiya Nadeshiko."

Her face turned into fifty shades of red. "Jeez, Makoto."

I chuckled, leaned against the counter, and took her in. She was wearing my undershirt which only reached the middle of her thighs, the first two buttons weren't closed, and the white fabric cinched around her waist delightfully. She was barefooted and the morning light coming from the glass windows shone right through her, giving me a clearer view of her white flawless skin. Some of her straight blonde locks that her hairtie had missed to hold were framing her beautiful face, and the purple marks around her neck down to her collarbone were the evidence of last night's pleasure.

She was breathtakingly beautiful with just that.

Hanamiya Makoto, you're a lucky bastard!

"What are you staring at?" she asked, confusion and wonder dancing through her eyes.

I smirked then in a husky tone, confessed, "You're unconsciously seducing every bit of my flesh, babe."

She went still, then her face went into a whole new level of redness, as if fifty shades of red still wasn't enough. "B-Baka, stop it with that! I'll change right away."

But before she could take a step, I was already behind her, wrapping my arms around her from behind. "Don't change. You look raveshing in that."

"Then stop saying embarrassing things. It's making me.. me..."

"Hot?" I finished for her with a smirk. Then my smirk grew wider as the sudden bright images of last night took a hold of my mind.

"No, that's not it. It's embarrassing," she said in a low tone before tangling her fingers with mine, dragging my arms more tightly around her. "But last night was wonderful, Makoto. Thank you for loving me in the best way that you could."

It was my freaking turn to blush at her confession. My cheeks flared up and my breathing hitched. Then a pleased and satisfied smile curled up my lips. "I should be the one thanking you. Thank you for trusting me, Nadeshiko. For giving me a chance, for loving me no matter who and what I am, for marrying me, and for giving me Ryuzaki."

I knew what she would say, she would tell me that she loves me. I knew her too well. I just knew her.

But then,

I was wrong.

What she said was better than what I expected. It was something far more beautiful than those three words.

"Thank you for coming into my life, Makoto. You're the only person I want to spend the rest of my life with. And I can't wait for tomorrow, or the next day, and the next next day, with you and Baby Ryuzaki beside me."

I nuzzled my face on her shoulder blades, trying to hide the tears in my eyes. I've never been more happy all my life. "I love you so much, Nadeshiko."

She leaned her head against mine. "I love you too."

I gently drew away, turned her around, looked at him in the eyes and kissed her lips. A delicate, gentle kiss. As if her lips were so fragile it would break with the slightest force. But the way she responded was different, there was an edge. A wicked naughty edge that made me forget about the gentleness I was displaying at first. And before I could lose control completely, I pulled away, breathless.

"Are you really trying to seduce me?" I asked with a rougish grin.

She laughed, a laugh I've always loved to hear. "Nu-uh. Not my fault if I'm too hot for you."

A loud laugh escaped my lips. "Oh really?"

She stuck her tongue out at me then walked over to the table where our breakfast was prepared. "Whatever, Makoto. Let's just eat, I'm hungry."

"Actually you just gave me an idea. Since you're asking for it, I'll give you what you want." I lunged at her and wrapped my arms around her waist. I lifted her up into the air, reveling in the way she shrieked and twisted in my arms.

"What about breakfast?" she squealed with a giggle as I made my way back to the bedroom with her in my arms.

"I guess breakfast will just have to wait."

"Oi, put me down!"

"Stop struggling, babe. Or we'll stumble down."

"Don't babe me, you idiot!"

"Come on. That again? Hahaha."

--

I was never the hero of a story, or a manga, or a show.

But I found my happy ever after, right here in my arms.

And I have no intention of letting her go again.

This time, I'll hold her forever. I'll stay beside her. I'll keep her in my heart...

Until my last breath.