"bubblegum, cherry pop, go to the hop!"

"hanging with my brother cause his friends are so hot."

"we're cruising-"

"for a bruising, now shut up."

jamie, donghyuck, and chenle all acted upset and offended at renjun's denial of their actions.

the four were standing outside the building where jisung's competition was, waiting for johnny, jaehyun, jaemin, mark, jeno, and taeyong.

jamie was nervous and trying to distract herself. who knew how jisung was going to react when he saw she had come, even with him telling her not to.

the doors opened thankfully after everyone had gotten there, and they all piled in, jamie and jaemin last.

jamie glanced at jaemin, concern and worry written all over her.

he smiled softly, "it'll be okay, i'm here."

jamie nodded and took a deep breath before walking into the doors, jaemin right next to her.

"i feel like we're being chaperoned," donghyuck voiced as they all sat down, "can't you three like leave and sit away from us?"

"your friends are mean," taeyong said, looking at jamie who shrugged in response.

jaehyun scoffed, "my birthday, my rules."

with that, he took the seat next to jamie before donghyuck did, leaning the male to gap at the older in shock.

taeyong, johnny, and jamie who had all witnessed jaehyun on his birthday before, laughed hard.

the male was demanding and lazy on his birthday, only ever wanting to do what he wants when, anything else was done by others. jamie had to get up early to make his special chicken and waffles breakfast this morning because if it wasn't homemade and was store bought, jaehyun would've thrown a fit.

johnny and taeyong sat on the other side of jaehyun, forcing the rest of jamie's friends, minus jaemin, to move down one to make room for the last member.

the dance competition went smoothly, little to no people got hurt, and jisung awed them all.

jamie couldn't help but watch him as he danced, in awe of his smooth moves. he looked like he was born to be on stage dancing.

"too bad ten went back to thailand," taeyong voiced after the competition as they all stood and waiting for jisung to come, "he loves dancing."

"poor chitta," jamie sighed, "i can't believe he's actually staying in thailand."

"his mother is dying?" jaehyun mumbled, "wouldn't you stay with her?"

jamie, johnny, and jaemin all stared at him, deadpan.

"my mother is in prison," jamie responded, "if she died, it would be beneficial to the prison because it would be one less person to feed and less money for the tax payers to send for that food and to keep the prison running."

"you're cold," taeyong said, "she still birthed you."

jamie crossed her arms, "yeah? reluctantly. when she found out she was pregnant, my father found her trying to kill me by jumping and landing on her stomach and hitting it against different things because they were too poor for a proper abortion and she didn't trust the people on the street."

the boys, except johnny, all stared at jamie in shock as she walked over to the group of younger ones, leaning against donghyuck.

donghyuck barely glanced at jamie before moving and making her stumble.

"that's mean," jamie scoffed, hitting donghyuck before leaning against mark on the other side of her.

he just let her be, continuing to talk to renjun about something jamie could only imagine.

"i won!" they all heard jisung screech as he ran over full speed into chenle.

he stopped dead in his tracks of celebrating when he saw jamie there, her head still against mark's shoulder as she played with his sleeve, bored out of her mind and in a daydream.

mark lightly elbowed her to wake her up, the girl looking around in shock before seeing jisung.

the boys around jisung continued to celebrate, but he just stared at jamie who bashfully hid behind mark.

"he's not going to bite you," mark mumbled to her.

"how do you know?" jamie asked quietly back, "i've seen him bite chenle before."

mark furrowed his brows, "should i ask?"

jamie shook her head, urging him to go over to jisung.

mark reluctantly left her side and the girl migrated back over to her brothers and taeyong, absentmindedly playing with jaehyun's jacket, doubts running through her mind a mile a minute.

was he that ashamed? did he really hate her that much? he seemed so angry and yet scared when he saw her. he really didn't want her there, and jamie knew when she wasn't wanted. she wanted to go home.

just as she went to open her mouth to voice her want, jaehyun's eyes widened and his face went pale, like he had seen a ghost.

jamie started to panic, "jaehyun? what's wrong?"

she tried to follow his line of sight.

lizzy was sauntering towards them, her head high. a short bob framed her face and her bright red lipstick stood out, drawing the attention she so desperately craved.

she didn't stop at the group of four who were staring at her silence, barely glancing at them and acknowledging them.

she went straight for jisung, his eyes wide, panic clear on his face.

"good job jisung," lizzy's smile was definitely sarcastic, "for being the worse one up there. seriously, when are you going to quit? you're so bad at dancing."

chenle held jisung's hand, the latter putting his head down and mumbling an apology to her.

rage filled jamie's heart and if it weren't for the crowd, or jaehyun's hand that was basically crushing hers, she would've jumped the older who would've been knocked out by now.

the boys all stood in shock as lizzy's face turned from angry to flirty and she ran her hand down mark's arm, "mark! i didn't know you were going to be here."

the male, obviously uncomfortable, took a step back, "yeah, jisung and i are friends."

"how can you be friends with him?" lizzy asked mark, stepping closer again, her hand still lingering on him, "jisung is a failure with no personality."

jamie shot forward, done with the way the girl was treating them, took mark's hand, and pulled him away from lizzy, "get your filthy hands off my boyfriend!"

the group stood in shock at jamie's outburst, the girl basically shooting lasers through her eyes at lizzy who was equally filled with rage.

"jimin, why are you here? don't tell me you're actually friends with jisung too. jisung has no female friends, i've made sure of that," lizzy scoffed.

jamie's lips raised in anger, barely able to control herself as to not pummel the other female, "so what if i am?"

"hoe," lizzy snarled, "isn't sitting in jaehyun's lap enough? now you have mark and my brother? i bet you're with all the guys around us."

mark's hand shot out, multiple quick and startled words along the lines of "woah" leaving his lips as he stopped jamie from hitting the older female.

"mark is my boyfriend," jamie lied through gritted teeth, "i have nothing with none of the others, especially not jaehyun because that would be incest and i'm not about that life unlike you."

jamie hit a nerve, she could tell, and she instantly regretted the words that left her lips as jisung turned and ran, chenle running after him in panic.

lizzy stared at her in shock for a few minutes before slapping the girl across the face and walking away.

jamie looked at jaemin in regret, the male instantly going to her side and holding her face, whispering words of comfort.

tears built in jamie's eyes, "why did i do that?"

renjun looked at her in disgust before leaving, mark debating staying or leaving until renjun pulled him along.

jeno was next to jamie was well, the two boys trying their hardest to calm her down.

"please leave me too," jamie cried, "i don't deserve friends."

doubts and self-depreciating comments screamed at her. she could barely see the two boys' faces, drowning in her emotions. all she could hear was her brain screaming "i hate you."

panic rose in her throat, her breathing getting constricted and her ears ringing. her chest hurt and her lungs screamed for air as she let out a startled gasp, pushing the two boys away and stumbling back.

johnny, taeyong, and jaehyun were by her side in a matter of seconds, johnny using centering techniques to try and calm her down.

it didn't help, she couldn't get out. it felt like water had surrounded her and dragged her down, a heavy weight on her ankle. she couldn't see, everything was blurred, hot tears streaming down her cheeks. she couldn't open her mouth to speak, she could barely breathe. strangled gasps leaving her lips, coughs as well. she felt suffocated. she felt the hands on her throat, she could see jisung in front of her, mocking her and scorning her, jesting as well. she could feel his hand on her throat.

by now, a crowd had formed around them of stranglers waiting for their children who were all talking still.

the noise was fuzzy, she couldn't hear it, couldn't make it out, all she could hear was white noise.

she barely registered the pain on her cheek, the stinging it left behind.

"focus on me," the voice was fuzzed, but she recognized it, "everything will be okay."

she blinked and jisung wasn't in front of her anymore, instead it was jaemin, hands on her shoulders, his face very close to hers. he was staring into her eyes, trying to appear calm, but she could tell he was panicking too.

she felt herself observing him, the panic still there, but lessening as jaemin repeatedly spoke to her.

she saw his pretty brown eyes staring back at her, the small freckles and sun spots littering his face, traces of acne scars and acne in general barely visible but still there. his lips weren't in the pretty smile they normal were, instead in a deep frown. he was so familiar, it comforted her.

"you're safe, he doesn't hate you. i promise you, he doesn't hate you and neither does she. you did nothing wrong. i love you, we can get through this."

a sob left her lips and she flung herself into her arms, her heart still pounding in her ears, her head still pounding, everything still there.

including jaemin.

her panic slowly subsided as jaemin held her in his arms tightly, whispering comforting words in her ears, telling her about his plans this week, how many times he was going to come to their apartment and when, how lucky he was to have her with him.

jamie didn't appreciate the eyes on her when she came back, a buzz still left in her veins and her hands still shaking, but she felt better.

johnny and jaehyun enveloped her in tight hugs when she finally let go of jaemin, both rambling about how scared they were.

"what now?" jamie asked, looking at jaemin.

"i still want my birthday dinner," jaehyun scoffed.

"renjun just texted me saying if i don't come to their dinner, i am officially a traitor," jeno mumbled.

"me too," jaemin said, putting his phone in his pocket.

"guess we're traitors then," jeno beamed.

"actually, jeno, wheein's shift is ending early so we have to leave because you know how she is when ruby is in the crate and not walked when she gets home," taeyong said.

everyone looked at the two curiously.

"taeyong is my brother," jeno explained, a happy expression on his face, "his dad and my mom were a thing before his dad met mark's mom and they had me. my mom couldn't afford to keep me and our dad didn't know about me, but now i'm living with taeyong and wheein and mr. lee and mrs. lee are going to adopt me."

jaemin and jamie crushed jeno in a hug, congratulating him, expressing their happiness for him.

he reciprocated it, hugging them back just as tight and laughing lightly, a huge smile on his face.

taeyong and jeno left shortly after, and so the four js were left to find a dinner spot for jaehyun.

jaehyun, being jaehyun, demanded that they go to a restaurant on the other side of seoul, so they spent the next few hours traveling all the way there for a restaurant that, in jamie and jaemin's opinion, wasn't worth it.

by the time they got back home, visiting hours for the hospital were almost over, so they quickly ran there and into lucas's room.

the male was peacefully sleeping, a nurse that was on duty to watch him was doing what looked to be schoolwork.

"he couldn't even stay up to say happy birthday," jaehyun grumbled.

"it's not his fault you dragged us to east jabip and back," jamie scoffed.

"i don't get your english sayings," jaehyun sneered back, "i only lived in america for four years."

"well, guess it's time to call it a night," johnny said, putting his arm around jaehyun's shoulders, "and by night i mean time for movies. are you staying over jaemin?"

jamie met jaemin's eyes and he nodded, a smile making its way on her lips, "yay! we haven't had a four js sleepover in a while."

jamie and jaemin walked behind jaehyun and johnny a bit, the two in front of them in their own world.

"jamie, are you okay?"

jamie looked at jaemin who was already looking at her in worry.

"i will be," jamie murmured, "i feel selfish for being upset when i was the one who hurt jisung."

"jisung will get over it," jaemin scoffed, "my son is tougher than that. besides, he knows you, he knows you didn't mean that."

"why did it seem to upset him so much though?" jamie wondered aloud, "does lizzy... no."

jaemin shrugged, "i honestly have no idea, the kid tells me nothing. i bet we could find out from chenle though, he's such a blabbermouth."

jamie shook her head, "i don't want to push it. chenle probably hates me anyway for what i said today... i hate myself for it, but the past is the past... i can't dwell over it, all i can do is fix the future."

"i'm proud of you," jaemin smiled, sneakily holding her hand, "we'll work through this together."