(February 7th, 2015)

  "What the hell?" I heard a scream and fell out of bed, rubbing my eyes and then looked up, narrowing them at Jeremy who just woke me up for no reason at all.

  "Why are you yelling at six in the morning? What in the world of all around us is wrong with you?" I asked, growing angrier by each minute of looking at his emotionless expression.

  "What is wrong with me? What is wrong with you! You're the one who got a tattoo," he yelled, his face growing red and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, looking down at my crumpled shirt that rolled up and gathered up at my chest, perhaps in my sleep. I groaned when I saw the white sachet from the tattoo, off.

  "I do what I want. I wanted to get a tattoo and so I got it, do you have a problem with it? Well, it's your problem and not mine," I stated, raising my eyebrow at him.

  He still looked angry and he looked like he was about to say something and explode a little after, but decided against it and so I ignored his glares and tried to go back to sleep which did not happen because it seemed like Jeremy had other plans anyway. He pulled me closer to his inked chest and massaged my back.

  "Jeremy, please.." I trailed off, trying to tell him to stop, but both of us knew that that was the last thing I wanted right now.

  "As much as I hate the fact that you got a tattoo, I have got to admit it looks hot," he whispered into my ear. I could feel him grinning by the tone of his voice and it took everything in me not to smile, not to give him the pleasure of seeing me smile. As much as his approval was never asked for or needed, it was still nice to know that he approves of something that I do, especially the fact that we have to work on getting along since we are one, married and two, live under one roof.

  Living under one roof with the same person that you tried running away from was not easy. Living witht hem under one roof and making love to them because you had natural chemistry was complicated. Living with them under one roof, married by a signed contract and played wedding and trying to be friends, is completely out of this world and I think that the world might collapse from its heaviness onto my shoulders for I can't hold it anymore.

  "Please.." I said again, but it came out more as a whisper that anyone would refuse to take as a demand.

  "Cassidy," he groaned, flipping me over by the waist to face him. He looked me straight in the eyes and I gulped. I definitely knew what was coming. I found him grinning mischievously and my eyes widened at his enthusiasm.

  "You have to be at work now, Jeremy. Please let go off me so that I can prepare breakfast for you and myself of course," I said like I was talking to a kid, as slow as possible and pointing my finger out the door, in case the kid did not understand. Only, he wasn't a kid and he sure as hell can understand.

  "Work can wait and I can prepare breakfast on my own," he replied, his voice getting huskier by the minute and I couldn't help the pool in my stomach that was growing in need.

  "The last time you tried, you burned the kitchen," I argued, knowing that it would never lead to something good. It never does. Me and Jeremy together are like the fire and water, never good together, but strong apart.

  "Which means this time, I'll have to have something else for breakfast," he said, winking at me as he played with the hem of my shirt and I sighed which made him smile in return.

  It never amazed me how perverted his mind was. It always lead to no good. 

  I took of his shirt and slowly ran my finger down his inked torso, tracing each picture that was inked into him, teasing him and he groaned, making me smirk back at him. I wasn't the type to tease, but a physical monopoly was definitely something I would never forget.

  "Two can play the game," I whispered, climbing on top of him and straddling his hips, he wiggled his eyebrows at me and I stifled a laugh.

  "I knew that there was a little bit of devil in your angel eyes," he said, pressing my body to his and holding me by the waist, flipping me over so that now he was the one on top of me. His breath tickled my neck and I sucked in my own breath to stop myself from sighing, again.

  "Less talking," I mumbled, and placed my lips on his, feeling the warmth seeping into me as his lips moved against mine, his tongue dominating my mouth. I wrapped my hands around his neck and pulled him closer to me if that was even possible. I could feel him smile against my lips and that left me as satisfied as I could ever be.

  He responded really quick. His hand moved up to cup my breast and I moaned into his mouth, wrapping my thighs around his bare torso whilst running my hand down his inked arm, admiring the beauty of him on top of me. He kissed my jaw, neck and nibbled my earlobe, making me giggle at the contact.

  His hands played with the hem of my shirt and I pushed my hands out through the sleeves and he pulled it off me, leaving me in a black lacy bra.

  "Fu-" I placed my fingers on his lips and scolded playfully, "no cursing," I smiled and he nodded.

 His hands moved to the back of my lacy bra and he was playing with the clasp, teasing me as I groaned and pushed his hands away to unclasp it whilst he unbuttoned my jeans.

  The door bell rang and it took all my power, energy and need to push myself off him and go get it and so, I did.

  I heard Jeremy groan when I put my bra back on and slipped my jeans back and went to open the door, finding Acacia standing behind it, grinning like a cheshire cat.

  "Wow, I did not know you started greeting people with lacy bras on. Jeremy must be going crazy, I think I already hear him groaning," she laughed and I joined her.

  "He sure is going mad, he was just leaving for work. Come on in," I said, pushing the door open as she unzipped her boots and I helped her take the coat off, hanging it behind the door and leading her into the kitchen.

  "Cassidy!" Jeremy called out, "I need help with my tie," really, did he really need me for that. God.

  He had known how to tie a tie since we were in high school. This is ridiculous. What could he possibly want from me right now when he clearly knows that I have guests outside and he can manage the tie on his own?

  "Poor husband of yours, not taken good care of," Acacia muttered, rolling her eyes and I had to hold back a laugh. I jumped off the little stool that I was sat on and walked towards the bedroom, closing the door behind me whilst hearing Acacia rummaging through the cupboards, probably making some coffee.

  "What's wrong, Jeremy?" I asked curiously eyeing him, expecting a secret weapon to appear from behind him and pierce it through my heart just like he always does, but nothing happened and so I nudged him and he blinked a few times, his eyes moving from my chest and then to my face. I totally forgot about my shirt.

  I walked to my closet and pulled out a black tank top, pulling it over my head and down my waist, it reached my mid thigh and so I slid of my shorts and slipped my colored leggings on. They were of different patterns and colors, too many to describe.

   I knew Jeremy wouldn't approve of it, but it didn't matter. It was my choice of clothing and it wasn't like  would ever go out in this anyway and so, I pushed the thought to the back of my mind.

  I helped Jeremy with his tie and also buttoned up his white shirt and tucked it for him into his dress pants, helping him put on his socks like a little child and rushed him out of the door because, one, I will be having Hana to come over in a few and Acacia was here. It is not appropriate for him to hang around and two, my client will be here in no time.

  "Acacia, could please sit in my room and watch a movie or something for about an hour until I am done with my client?" I asked, my eyes begging her to agree.

  "Sure, my lovely therapist. I don't even know why you became one. It is just so boring listening to people mop around," she said, eyeing me. Why is everyone eyeing me today?

  "It is not boring, one and two, I am helping people and I love my job now chop, chop, out now!" I said, waving my hands at her dismissively and she left to my bedroom, I closed the door behind her and heard the door bell ring and I looked through the peep hole to see the fifteen year old girl I was waiting for.

  I have never spoken to her yet and so I was waiting to personally meet her apart from the information that her mother gave me.

  "Hello, I am Lyric..." the girl said, smiling shyly and I grinned back at her, knowing that she would be one of the sweet and soft spoken people who wouldn't have a problem to talk to me.

  "Lyric, that's a very interesting name. Please have a seat wherever you wish," I suggesting, pointing my hands to the kitchen, living room and the drawing room. She sat on the white fluffy ball chair that was placed in the middle of the living room, in front of the black, glass coffee table and I took a seat in front of her, on the white couch.

  "Tell me something about yourself,"

  "Well, I am fifteen years old and I think I am about to tell you how I feel about everything because I have been wanting to talk with someone like you for a while and well.. yeah," she stammered and her cheeks turned a shade of dark pink and I smiled at her sweetness and encouraged her to go on and tell me what she needs to.

  "I have a good life. A bed, food and a roof over my head. Everything I could possibly need. My family is always there for me too. There is really not much to ask for," she said, looking up at me for something and I encouraged her to continue further, letting her know that I am listening.

  "But, to be happy I am always laughing. A smile hides a lot, it hides too much. I was diagnosed with mild depression a month ago and I have tried committing suicide. Three times. I have been bullied since third grade. Your nose is too big, your waist is too small. It isn't small enough, you're too tall and ugly, annoying, prude, immature, too short, a slut. I have heard it all," she ranted, mimicking all over her bullies' voices and my heart ached for her.

  "Words hurt," she said sighing and then continued, "and when people bring you down enough, you start to believe it yourself. I tried not to listen, but they are so loud, so close. I changed myself so the bullying would stop," she sobbed, but never stopped and said, "it slowed down"

  "I still hear things now and then and it does hurt just as worse, if not more," and she started sobbing and crying like I have never seen anyone before. She cried so much, I think a long time have passed and I let her do it, I brought her to my chest and made her snuggle into me, wiping her tears off and asking her to look at me and then I said, "I am sure that you did not deserve any of this, but the only thing you need to get over this is yourself,"

  "You have to regret the fact that you gave them the power to put you down like that. You are stronger than this. As easy it may sound and hard to do, you still must never give up. I know how it feels, I have been there once and that is what lead me to help people. It all sucks, it really does, but someone does care. You just do not see it. You are really beautiful, both inside and out. Keep your head up, don't look down. Keep looking forward and ignore the crowd. You will thank them for the pain, for the disbelief and the shame. It's going to be their loss that you gain and who needs them anyway?" I asked smiling at her.

  I continued, "And I know you think that you will never be heard, so small in this great big world, but you're gonna make it. I know you're going to break it. I know it hurts, I know it burns. They cut with razor blade words and you die a little from the inside. You are worth so much more. You will rise above it all, little by little," I went on and on with as much encouragement as I could.

  When it came to work, I always tried to be less professional. It makes my clients more comfortable. I have seen many therapist talk professional and the results come off only in the next few years. It was a different case with me.

  As soon as she left, I closed up my notepad where I usually write everything down when it came to work and stashed it into my office during which I attended only on Mondays.

  You know the words once upon a time, make you listen, there's a reason. There's a chance you'll find a little laughter and happily ever after.

  Happily ever after is so once upon a time and there is no other way.

  Acacia was in my room replaying the CD's I had collected from all these years of our annual programs, I would tell her to keep them in and maybe watch them next time, but she being as stubborn as she is, never listens to silly thing that people tell her and apparently I didn't give her any reason as to why she should not watch it and so when I told her not to she just flipped her dark brown hair over the shoulder and dismissed me.

  So, whilst she was watching all those programs, I was in the kitchen cleaning up the mess Jeremy made this morning. I had a lot in mind right now. Hana will be coming anytime soon, hopefully Acacia would leave before anything dramatic happens.

  I rinsed all the dishes that were left in the sink and placed them in the dishwasher, closing it and pressing a few buttons to bring the machine to life.

  An hour later Acacia enters the kitchen and glances at me weirdly.

  "Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked, whilst preparing a big American breakfast for me and Hana and some more for Acacia in case she stays. Before starting to make some food I listed the pros and cons of doing so, the pros were the food and the cons were making it and so one on one, I decided to make it anyway. It's not like I am going to stay hungry through out.

  "Nothing, I was just thinking," she mumbled, picking up her bag, phone and car keys from the kitchen counter and holding her hands out for a hug.

  I placed my knife down and went in for the hug and asked, "You're leaving already?"

  "Yeah, mom called and she needs me at home. I can't wait to get married and get out of house. As much as I hate Jeremy, I still think you are lucky to be out of your parents house," she complained.

  "I can't help but agree with you," I smiled slightly.

  She gave me a final wave and with that she left, closing the door behind her.

  Sometimes I lay in bed and read books. Any books that I found liking to my mood. I would eat what my stomach likes and not what I would like to have.

  I wonder about everyone's lives and if we will survive the collapse of our earth.

  I wonder how much more time is left for us on this earth and I also know that wondering all this is not healthy, but I still do and so be it.

  Until now, I didn't know what to do with my life and I understand why Jeremy was mad at me for all the tattoos. Before we signed the marriage agreement, which was before the wedding, I scolded him and told him that he couldn't have anymore tattoos or snap backs, only suits and a good job and he made me a rule, no more piercings and leggings, but nice dresses and good cooking skills and so I broke the rule.

  But it still wasn't a reason to wake me up at this time in the morning, what made me wonder is, what was Acacia doing here in the first place, at seven in the morning? Not like I mind, but when I asked her she said nothing and so, I let it slip by.

  My phone buzzed and I unlocked it to view the message which was from Hana, it read;

I'll be there in five, hope you've made something, hungry :$

  I sent her a text back, saying;

You're always hungry ;) But, hurry up :*

  With that said and sent, I closed my phone, placing it back on the kitchen counter and started preparing the Mexican filled omelette.

  I squeezed the avocado flesh into the blender, discarding the stone and skin. Squeezed in all the juice from 2 limes, ripped in the coriander stalks, added the yogurt and a splash of oil and whizzed until it was smooth, then seasoned to perfection.

  I peeled the onion and carrot. Ideally in a food processor, or using a box grater and good knife skills, grated the onion and carrot, then finely sliced the cabbage. Very finely sliced the chili by hand, then tipped everything into a large bowl. I added most of the coriander leaves, then poured over the avocado dressing and tossed together well. Tasted and seasoned to perfection again. Whisked all the eggs together in a bowl, with a splash of water to loosen and a pinch of salt and pepper.

  I placed the large non-stick frying pan on a medium-low heat. Once fairly hot, placed in a tiny drizzle of oil followed by a quarter of the egg mixture. Swirl it all around the pan, grated over a quarter of the cheese and let it melt, then cooked the omelette gently without colouring it, so it's soft, silky and smooth, for just under two minutes, only cooking on one side. Slide it on to a plate, spoon over a quarter of the avocado slaw, then gently folded up the sides and rolled them over.

  As soon as I was done with that, I placed a large bowl onto the table and sifted the flour, baking powder, salt and sugar. Making a well in the center and poured some milk, eggs and melted butter; I mixed it until it was smooth. I heated a light oiled griddle over a medium high hear and poured the batter into the griddle, using approximately one-fourth for each pancake.

  I was setting up the table when I heard the door bell ring and I was too busy to get it, knowing that it wasn't locked a yelled, "Come in,"

  I heard a little of shuffling here and there and saw Hana coming up to me with a huge grin on her face, her hands opening up for a hug and I gladly went for it, wrapping my hands around her now, much thinner waist.

  "Wow, you moved to a size ten. What did I miss?" I asked, smiling at her and she grinned back. Well, she's in a great mood. I noticed something glistening on her finger, but closed my eyes, ignoring it and smiled back at her again, asking her to have a seat.

  "Are you going to tell me your secret?" I asked, pointing at her now, very healthy and great shaped body, it's like she was molded. Perfect.

  "You're a size eight!" she screeched, "you've always been, what else do you need?" she asked, wide eyed and I laughed.

  "I am just wondering, you look great," I complimented, smiling back at her.

  "Well?" I pushed, raising n eyebrow.

  "Okay, here it goes. I was at the gym. After Jeremy asked you to marry him and all when we were in London for college. I was mad and angry, at myself mostly because I thought I wasn't good enough. I wanted to look good, for myself and I tried for a few times, but I just couldn't feel it you know? Just before I gave up, this guy came up to me and helped me. I started going there again, the same time and saw him a few more times. I finally asked him where he worked and he told me that he was a personal trainer and I asked him, if he could, you know, train me and help me out and he did and here I am," she said, pointing at her body and waving her hand at me, showing me the ring with the big bright diamond.

  "Engaged!" she squealed and I grinned, chuckling slightly whilst pulling her into a tight hug and congratulating her.

  "I am so happy for you," I said, still smiling and meaning what I had just told her.

  Her natural dark eyes, which were covered with bright, emerald green lenses the last time I saw her beamed. Her black hair, which was cut into a short bob, now cascaded down her back in little curls and her make up was soft, making her look younger. She was beautiful, more natural, more like her. I guess she really did realize that she found someone better.

  I however, looked the same, well let me say, worse. Not by my looks or anything, but from the inside. I died my hair, I got a tattoo and I started dressing slightly different.

  I made some coffee for the both of us and now, she was seated on the couch and I was standing, my elbows on the kitchen counter, supporting the rest of my body weight.

  I turned around, making sure she didn't see my face and said, "I saw you umm.. messaged Jeremy yesterday or so and I was just wondering..." I trailed off, turning back around to find her eyes wide. Am I missing on something? She's engaged and Jeremy wouldn't.. He wouldn't again, would he?

  She started chuckling slightly and I frowned, "Cassidy, it's not like that!" She said, still laughing and I let out a sigh of relief.

  "What's all about?"

   "It's nothing you wouldn't like, but I cannot tell you because I promised Jeremy. Although, I was really surprised he needed my help," she smiled slightly and I had no choice but to trust her and so I did.

  We hang out for a few hours until she got a call from Kyle, who was her soon to be husband and left. Once she did, I called up Jeremy and asked him what he wanted for dinner. He never picked up and so I decided to wait for some time and watch a movie.

  It was only five in the evening when I was done when I get a text from Jeremy saying;

Sorry, In a meeting will call you later. Parents called, be ready by seven for dinner. Dress nice and formal, love you x

  I still wasn't comfortable with all the I love you stuff he started out since we married, I don't think that saying that will make anything better and so I did what I had to do and sent him a text saying;

Okay :)

  Something simple and fast always works and the smiley face would do good. 

  When he replied with a smiley face back, I walked into the closet and started looking through all the dresses I had to find nothing and so I decided to settle for a pair of black, formal dress pants with a olive button up with my sleeves rolled up. It was half formal and half casual, we're just going to parents and so I doesn't matter. I hope.

  It was already six thirty when Jeremy came home and embraced me into a hug, which I returned awkwardly and smiled.

  "I told you to be ready and it is already six thirty seven," he said, frowning.

  "I am," I mumbled, looking down at my plain outfit whilst he did the same with disapproval. 

  He dragged me by my arm into the room and pushed me into the closet leaving the doors of the closet open and then said, "Strip"

  "Excuse me?" I uttered in total disbelief, staring at him wide eyed.

  "I said strip, you're not going like that," he repeated and went into the closet with me whilst I stood dumbfounded. He rummaged through my dresses for a while until he pulled out something I though I would never wear.

  It was a black leather dress, which was sleeveless and short, too short to even cover my butt. Acacia bought it for me on my birthday and threatened me to wear it on that day, I was eighteen and I am twenty three now. Wearing that dress? I don't think even god will have mercy on me, talk about Hitler.

  "Come on," he pushed it onto me and sat on the bead, looking me up and down, smirking.

  I unbuttoned my shirt slowly, shrugging it off my shoulder and unzipped my pants, slowly sliding them off my legs. I unclasped my white lace bra and pulled the strapless, black full covering bra out off the shelf to find Jeremy standing behind me with seconds. 

  "No teasing, Cassidy. You and I both know, we can skip dinner and I will take you, right here, right on this floor, right this second, he said moving his hand down the valley of my chest and I gasped, covering my chest with the bra that I just pulled out, I struggled with the clip and Jeremy did so for me, pulling the dress on me and zipping it for me. He kissed down my neck, leaving a soft moan to escape from me.

  "My eyes focusing on the clothes that I left on the floor. I escaped his embrace and folded those clothes only to hear him groaning.

  "I swear to god, if you bend on more time in that dress," he threatened and I smirked. 

  I pulled out the black slack from the right drawer and pushed my dress up to my chest, Jeremy's eyes widening. 

  By seven, I was already in my dress, my legs covered by my black slacks making them look like to separate toothpicks, but Jeremy insisted because the dress was too short. He also instead I wear a blazer on top because my shoulders were exposed and seen. Well, I didn't know people weren't supposed to see shoulders.

  He was wearing his suit and tie, perfectly ironed and I made some Tuna Nicoise Salad to bring along, we were seated in the car now, silence in the air.

  It is a thirty minute drive and the salad in my hands must have been shake down to earth from Jeremy's driving. He will never improve.

  "Are we going to my parents'?" I asked, already knowing the answer. I've recognized the road he has taken and let me tell you, I wasn't excited.

  "Yeah," he mumbled, looking at me apologetically.

  "You should have told me earlier, I wouldn't have changed," I sighed, knowing the lecture that awaits me.

  Jeremy parked the car in my parents' drive away and helped me out of it, mumbling a 'after you' and I thanked him walking down the patio. I left three knocks on the door and waited. A few seconds later, my mother greeted us with her face broken into a bright red painted smile, her blue eyes wide and big. She wore an emerald green, floor length dress that complimented her curves. 

  Her stern voice, that was covered with sweetness snapped me back to look her in the eyes and I managed to draw a smile on my face that was covered by a faint, pink gloss.

  This was going to be a long day, I sighed as my mother hugged Jeremy and greeted him with all her glory. Jeremy never understood why I wasn't very fond of my parents, he wouldn't understand. 

  I grew up on my dad's money, carpeting my floor. I was expected to live in a fantasy that was created by my parents and not imagined by me. I was forced into a marriage that my dad needed and not the one I wanted.

  He never knew any of that, I've always kept the little details to my self back in high school, I was too scared to loose him and now I know that it doesn't matter.

  "Cassidy, how many times have I told you to always fix your make up," she said, disapprovingly looking at my pink, faint lips and I forced a smile, biting into the salad that I have made.

  We were seated in the dining room that basically screamed money, the chandelier hanging looks like it was made of diamonds that are guaranteed never to be found, but here and the floor shined like nothing ever before. The white, silky cloth placed, looked like it was made right here and there. The expensive chine that we were eating from, looked so fragile that you could be scared to even place your food into it. 

  I hated such dinners. 

  My mom prepared a lamb, that was stuffed with onions, potatoes and asparagus. I've never eaten a lamb and I didn't look forward to it either. I think my mother was satisfied that I was eating the salad. She would have blown up if she'd see me eat anything else.

  My mothers eyes still glared into me, but I tried hard to ignore them. My mom might like to be painted like a doll, however, I refused to look like Heath Ledger from the Batman series. 

  Jeremy placed his hand on my thigh, giving me a supportive squeeze and I smiled at him.

  George, my father, looked at me and asked, "Darling, how is everything going with business? Jeremy is doing a great job, isn't he?"

  "Yes, father. He is," I answered shortly.

  I don't think he caught the fact that I wanted to end this conversation and continued anyway, ignoring my pleads for him to stay shut.

  "When are my little grandchildren going to make it? I hope it is before the day I die," he chuckled and I spat the wine back into my glass tube, chocking on my own air. 

  Oh my. Not this, please not this.

  "Cassidy, look at you! Always not happy, why don't you smile? And how many times did I tell you to eat less, look at the amount of salad that is put into your plate! You're growing fat, your thighs look horrifying. I do not understand how Jeremy can stand it!" My mother scolded, trying to cover it with a smile.

  My fork dropped from the shock and she started scolding me on how I never learned the manners they tried to teach me for all those years. 

  I was more than furious and excused myself, running through the halls and out the mansion. I stood by the car, waiting for Jeremy to come out, but he never did.

  I suppose he was under their arms right now. How proud must they be of him taking care of everything.

____________

Hello everyone :) I hope you are happy that my chapters are longer than before and I am really excited with all the support that you are showing me and all the comments and votes are highly appreciated, always. 

I have created a wattpad group on facebook where I help everyone share and promote their stories and I was wondering if you guys where interested, also, follow my twitter @Miss_popular_97 for more updates and inspiration and here is my private instagram @xx_linny_xx I accept all my fans. Hope to see meet you in there and get to know many of you. If you guys have any questions please let me know.

It is sad to see and know the fact that this book will be ending soon, we are a little bit more than halfway through and I can't believe I have gone this far.

The link to the page and group is in the comment and on the external link. Those who have a facebook and are interested are all welcome :)

Picture of Cassidy Valentines to the side. Yaay, she's so pretty, isn't she?

I hope you enjoyed this chapter :3 The next will be updated soon. Please leave votes, comments and maybe fan me? :$

Love you all, 
Linda xx