"You have got different sort of beauty in this dressing. Quite peculiar! I am not seeing this way of dressing anywhere here." While struggling himself to undress me he said.

"You should come to India to see this type of dressing." I was feeling pleasure with the rough touch of his hands on my body.

Oh, my god! My mouth became dry remembering my experience with Chuck on that day. He did that as much better as Nathaniel did that to me! Both were experts in doing that! On many occasions afterwards also we satisfied each other's urge. I was always in a dilemma whether I was in love with him or not. He was handsome, he was making me terribly satisfied in sex but I could not feel emotionally towards him at all. But I did not know why, when I heard that he was married already, I deeply hurt and severed all my connections with him. My pride was wounded but I did not feel upset after severing my connection with him. I said to him quite clearly that it was not possible to me to continue my relationship with him. It has not become difficult to me to forget about him completely. But the starvation of sex pained me a lot and it is paining me no less even now also.

Even after I came to India, he phoned to me and talked with me occasionally. He said he divorced and living separate from his wife for a long time. I could excuse him but did not feel any interest towards him. Only his occasional phone calls reminded me about him. While I have been struggling myself with my dad's death and other things it has happened like this.

The memories of Chuck making me feel fear. Nathaniel had sexual relationship with me and he died. He became a devil and came to me. This Chuck also had sexual relationship with me and died. Would this Chuck also come to me as a devil like Nathaniel? Why two young men who had sex with me died like that? At quite a young age! I cannot understand how and why a thirty four years aged young man like Chuck got heart attack.

I closed my eyes and am breathing deeply to relax myself. But I cannot sleep as I have been many times recently. I am feeling a sort of uneasiness in myself. I am trying to remember what Viola said to me to sleep peacefully. Yes, I have got successes. Viola's words perfectly came into my mind and I am forcing myself to implement them. Slowly I am finding that uneasiness is clearing itself and giving way to peaceful and blissful.....sleep.

***

"I forgot to tell you something." I am enjoying the coffee in the hall and said to Viola.

"Tell me what it is?" it seems Viola is also enjoying hers. I can see a satisfying and happy expression in her face.

"I got a wonderful secretary for me. Nova Harrison her name. She is having wonderful qualifications also."

"Unlike your previous secretary. I think you faced lot of trouble with her."

"You are right." I am making slow sips of my coffee. "I would have ousted her if she herself not decided to resign the job."

"I want to meet with this new secretary. I come with you to your office."

"I want you to come with me everyday to my office." Viola's company with me always is really very desirous to me.

"I planned to stay with you for a long time. So don't worry."

I am observing Viola. Viola is indeed attractive, youthful. She has revolutionary ideas and she takes sex also in an easy way. I found her spending time with one or two guys.

"Don't mention about my sexual affairs. How do you feel having it like this before marriage?" on one day I asked her.

"Just common and a natural thing. We drink water whenever we feel thirsty. We eat food whenever we feel hungry. Do we think much about these?"

I became aghast! Even I am also a little liberal with sex, I cannot take it as easy is as drinking water and eating food.

"Be careful not to get diseases. That much is enough." Viola said again

"I cannot take sex as easily as you are taking it."

"What about your Nathaniel? How many times he might have done that to you by now?" with a sneer on her lips she asked me.

"I said in the beginning itself. Don't mention mine here."

"How should not I mention? How can you exclude yourself from this?"

"Oh, my god!" I gasped. "I agree I am allowing him to do that. But every time I am feeling that I am doing a mistake. Immoral."

It was a long time back and Chuck did not enter into my life by then.

"Just get rid of this feeling. Enjoy it to the fullest extent possible. Or if you do think it is that much immoral stop it completely."

"Why you are looking at me like this? Have you found anything different in me?" Finished her coffee and put the cup on the table there, Viola asked me.

"Nothing at all." I laughed and came into the present. "You are indeed very attractive and youthful."

"I must agree with you. Guys who spent time with me said it like that. Not just before that, after that also?"

I understood what she meant by that and it seems she noticed the change in my expression.

"Are you feeling odd with what I have said to you?" she frowned her brows together.

"Why do I feel odd? I am no less. I let two young men did that to me so far. I let one between them to do that to me even before I became a woman."

"Are you feeling odd? Sinful?" the frowns thickened on the face of Viola.

"Sometimes. Yes." I closed my eyes and leaned back in the sofa.

I felt a smooth touch on my shoulder and opened my eyes. Viola put her hand around my neck and is looking into my face.

"It is natural." Viola smiled and said. "Feeling like that after a sexual acrobat with other people."

"Are you also feeling like that whenever you have sex with boys?"

"Yes. Sometimes of course." Viola breathed heavily and took off her hand. I am feeling relieved rid of that burden but Viola's saying perplexed me.

"Why cannot we stop this?"

"What should we stop?"

"Having sex with guys before marriage?"

"Is it is okay to you having sex with guys after the marriage?"

"Shut up?" I yelled. "We do have sex from our husbands."

"What it would be until then? Starving for sex?"

"But we are not feeling good doing it like that. You said that you are also not feeling good every time you are doing it."

"We cannot help feelings Dazzle. They come and go. Just like tides in the sea. How many times you have had guilty feeling for having it like that? But that feeling did not remain in you forever. If you do feel guilty whenever after doing that just let that guilty feeling linger in you as long as it wants. You can see its going away slowly from you also."

"You talk very peculiarly Ola. I need to learn a lot from you."

"As we both are going to be together from now, I think we can discuss a lot."

I am about to talk something more to Viola but I heard my cell phone ringing. I took it into my hand and looked at the screen. An unknown number and an unknown identity through true caller.

"Who it is this early morning?" before attending the call I said. "Hello?"

The other side is a woman and I am listening with interest while she is asking for my identification. "You are talking with the right person. Now tell me who you are and why do you want to talk with me?"

"You are the recent girl friend of Chuck Watson, are not you?"

I startled for that abruptness and am feeling angry. For a moment I cannot think of what to say. Viola also might have found out the peculiarity in that call and is interestingly looking into my face.

"First tell me who you are? Then I decide whether to answer your question or not." I cannot refrain myself without getting angry. My anger is quite evident in my voice also.

"I am Chuck Watson's wife."

Once again I startled. A phone call direct from the Chuck's wife! What she wants to talk with me? "You both have got divorce and living separate."

"That is a lie. We neither have got divorce nor living separate."

It is really very much surprising to me. I cannot believe this! I cannot imagine that Chuck Watson was that much big liar.

"I can prove if you do want. I looked after him all these days. Except looks he has got nothing else." There is a pause. "Even he is skilled very much in his profession he does not prefer to practice it."

It is really very difficult to me to believe. Even there would be no impact of this on my life, I just cannot believe it. Could Chuck that much big of a rogue and scoundrel!

"Chuck died with a heart attack." I hissed out heavily and said.

"Good riddance to both of us."

I just don't know what to say immediately. But one paramount question in my mind is to ask her. "May I know the purpose behind this call?"

"I came to know about you through someone here. I came to know how deep you loved him."

That woman is thinking that we both were deep lovers! No surprise. Anyone who found us like that thinks so. I did not say anything. I guess that woman is going to say something more.

"I want to find out how you are feeling now. If you are feeling too bad that he left the world leaving you, I want to say that there is no necessity like that. Chuck Watson is a cheater, rogue, rascal and scoundrel."

"My god! I did not expect this at all! I never could think about him so!" I am saying without any flavor in my voice. "I thought he is only a liar but not this much."

"No one can. His exterior is like that. But I can prove everything I have said to you."

I don't want to talk anything. In fact I don't know what to talk. I don't know why but deep inside me I am feeling satisfaction and relaxation.

"Thank you very much for the information. But I came to know that he was married even before you told me. I felt angry and cheated as he concealed that from me and severed my emotional tie also with him. There is no sort of relationship between us both by the time he died." I explained to her.

"I am feeling very happy on hearing this from you. I thought you may be worrying about him too much and want to say he does not deserve that. He does not deserve a nice girl like you. I came to know fully about you."

"Thank you very much." I cannot think of what else to say

"I am forwarding my details to you. You can contact me whenever you feel the necessity of it."

I thanked her once again and then she cut off the call.

(..........to be continued)

(I hope you enjoyed it so far. Please don't forget to rate and review it. I update the next chapter as early as possible.)