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Receiver: Sanjanasen67
Review

Chapters read: 10/10
Title (4/5)
As a non-mythological fan, I have no idea what it means in the first view. However, for a Mythology reader, it seems attractive to me. Moreover, you do mention in your blurb what this title means. 

Cover (5/5)
Your cover is amazing. The fonts are well visible. The knife, fire and hibiscus look beautiful. The border is fancy and that makes it beautiful too. Overall there's nothing that I would change in this one. 

Book description (4.5/5) 
You kept the description really short but it was on point. You mentioned everything that was needed to awake the curiosity of a reader. However, keep your note out of it and maybe you could add some more lines to the blurb but this is fine too. 

Prologue(0/5)
There's no Prologue to be seen. But it's always good to keep one because it gives you an idea what the story is about or what the current situation is. 

Grammar(3.5/10)
I found quite many grammar mistakes overall. The punctuation was missing at points and there were spelling mistakes. You chose wrong words at places and sometimes words were missing. Lack of punctuation made it quite difficult to read the story. 

Plot (4.5/10)
Beforehand I need to confess that I haven't read or seen Mahabharat. I know nothing about mythology but I had reviewed another book which portrayed almost the same scenes. I read a bit about Mahabharat for the review's sake and you put the mythology around Draupadi in your own words. Since Mahabharat is a sensitive issue, I won't say to be creative and interpret jew things but you could have portrayed their feelings in a better way. And maybe you could have taken something that is less portrayed maybe. 

Character(s)/ Development (4/10)
In the beginning, you have put two whole chapters of characters and half of them weren't even present till now. Probably you could have introduced them one by one. I had difficulties to identify with some of the characters but I guess this problem wouldn't occur at a Mahabharat fan's side. However, coming to their development. You failed to show their emotions and with that, the development wasn't visible too. You could have been more intense around all of it. 

Flow of the story (1.5/5)
At some points, I wished that you would have given some more details. You could have been more intense at places, such as the moment Kunti asks Arjun to share Draupadi. Or the fire scene. You were too fast at these places. Moreover, I got heavily disturbed by the pictures who were there. Some pictures would have been fine but there were too many. Some of them even intruded on the scenes and dialogues. That was really disturbing. 

Creativity (1.5/5)
As mentioned before, I felt to have read this story before too in the almost same way. Excluding the plot, it would have been a lot better if you would have intensified some moments. 

Your interest based on the content (2/5)
I felt your story was more like a monotonous tale than an emotional story. I couldn't connect with any character and there was no hook point for me since I have read something similar before too. 

Overall opinion (4/10)
I guess you should edit your story a bit. Firstly, you should focus on the grammatical mistakes. Secondly, try to intensify some feelings and scenes. Don't drag it, rather portray more about the story. However, for the positive fact, it's a good read if you want to know nearly about the story around Draupadi and the five Pandavas. 

Total (34,5/75)

Title
Not needed!

Blurb
Not needed!

Prologue
"Bhrata Yudhishthir, meet my sister Devika who is the princess of Shaivya kingdom", Krishna said mischievously...
"And Devi they are Pandavas, let me introduce them one by one...", he said while looking at them. But Devi is constantly staring at Dharmaraj, who is also gazing at her.
"This copper-hued eyes, his smile, his serene and calm face. Dharmaraj Yudhishthir, the name itself has some magic. I want to know him more - huh why I'm getting so attracted to him?" Devi murmured to herself.
"Shivi Kumari's smile is so beautiful, nah not only smile, her shining eyes, her rose-pink lips, her curly locks. Wait why am I saying all these things? I haven't met her before, but it feels like she is mine. No what am I thinking? This is wrong! Am I getting attracted to her?" Yudhi asked himself.
} {} {} {} {} {} {

Devi keeps on talking whereas Yudhi gets completely lost in her eyes.
"Are you feeling bored Yuvraj?" asked Devi.
"Never, Devi", he simply replied, lost in her beauty. "Rather, I found peace", he adds while murmuring.
"Can I say something? Actually, I want to say it before. That, actually, I really like to spend more time with you, so will you be my friend?" asked Devi with a hope of getting a positive response.
"Of course. I will!" he replied, but this time Yudhi blushed more.
"Feels like she is not just my friend, but more than that. I don't want to leave her! I always want her by my side. She made a special place in my heart. What's this feeling?" He questioned himself.
} {} {} {} {} {} {

Devika bought a simple embroidered friendship band(kind of Raksha kavach).
While Yudhi buys a dazzling anklet
"Yuvraj, I hope you will like it", Devi says by showing the friendship band.
"I hope this will protect u from all danger."
She tied it on his wrist with love and care while saying this.
"Devi, I will never take it off", Yudi assured her.
"Now show us your gift Yuvraj!" Vala said excitedly.
"Devi, can I make u wear this anklet? I know it's quite ordinary but I hope u will like it", Yudhi explained to her.
"No Yuvraj, you can't touch my feet!"
"PLEASE! Devi, it's a token of friendship. Please accept it", Yudhi requested while showing the anklet.
"Okay. It's pretty Yuvraj, it's really pretty." Amusement was clearly evident on her face.
} {} {} {} {} {} {

"Anuj, careful! The whole palace is made of flammable materials", Yudhishthir said shockingly while seeing all around. The others were equally shocked to hear that.
"Yes jyesth, your right. The walls of the palace started melting too, that means this Purochan along with Gandharaj tried to kill us by burning us alive!" Arjun was filled with anger. The Pandavas rush from the hall. They're about to open the door but before they could do that, the fire spreads over the whole palace.
} {} {} {} {} {} {

"DHARMRAJ!!!" Devika woke up from her sleep.
"What happened princess?" a worried Malini enquired from her.
"Don't know Malini but I saw a dream where Dharmraj along with his family is caught in a fire", she said with a trembling voice.
"No, it can't happen. They're warriors nothing will happen to them!" Malini confronted her with a similar fear in her heart.
} {} {} {} {} {} {

"Rajkumari, Vivah is going to start in a while. Rajkumari Draupadi wants you to be present in her vivah", interrupted Malini.
"Wow, and my puja is almost done. I'm going to give this prasad to Drau and bhrata Arjun, it's especially for the newly wedded couple", said Devika happily.
"But, her vivah is with the Pandavas. I mean with all the five Pandavas", Malini told with a low voice
"What rubbish? Are you out of ur sense Malini?" Devika's anger was evident and justified.
"No princess, I heard that Mata Kunti unknowingly passed an order that...", Malini was about to complete but Devika stopped her in between.

Devika was unable to believe her. She rushed towards the mandap, she was taken aback to see that whatever Malini said was true. Her eyes were filled with tears. The vision became blurry for her. She was completely taken aback to see Draupadi sitting beside Yudhishthir doing the rituals of their marriage. She was about to fall when Malini held her, giving her support. She couldn't control her tears anymore as her Dharmaraj is getting in a knot with someone else.
¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬

One day, rather one sentence and everything changed in their lives. Decisions were taken and sacrifices were made. Dharma played its game and they decided to support Dharma's play. It was to be seen how the sacrifices would affect their lives. What would happen in the future of all this? What would these sacrifices result? What would the sacrifices change in between all of them and moreover how will the equations evolve?

Cover
Not needed!