Word count: 810

Prompts: B98. "Nobody is perfect. That's what makes you special." and C38. "It just feels like I can never let go... even if I try."

Maybe they were right.

You saw a shadow coming towards you, and recognized him by the footsteps - you remembered telling Nyrra how you had a crush on Diaval. You remembered how she laughed while gushing about how cute you would be together, her laugh illuminating the whole room, your heart feeling light, you were feeling loved - now you felt stupid, trusting her with matters like that, as she had mocked you to everyone for having that crush, and that way Diaval found out about it too. Nyrra was a lovely person, but she could be manipulative at times, and you always knew in your heart that it would be the doom of your friendship one day.

Your friends were by your side, fortunately. The Faery Council hadn't kicked them out, but because of those events they weren't active in there anymore. They had had enough. And you just hoped you'd never see Nyrra again, you hated her now. You swore to yourself and everyone around you that you'll never forgive her, and everyone told you that it's a good call.

But fairies weren't created to hate. They were created to bring joy, safety, and to guard the magical lands. So the hatred in you burned you from inside, felt like darkness could consume you one day. So when Diaval sat beside you, you were immediately scared of blowing up again. What if you really were becoming a Dark Fairy? Diaval seemed to notice tears in your eyes, because he reached to touch your shoulder.

"Y/N?" he asked, and you took in a shaky breath. "Are you okay?"

His touch was everything you wanted when you were still friends with Nyrra, but now it felt like you'd destroy him too if you let him to come too close. Nyrra had been succesful in putting that thought your head - you'll bring nothing but harm to people around you. She was winning.

"I... I'm just breaking everything." you whispered and closed your eyes for a moment. "And I don't know how to fix those things."

You felt Diaval looking at you, before he sighed and pulled you to lie on his lap, stroking your wings and head, and you didn't bother to pull away. You were scared of breaking Diaval's trust and heart too, to drive him away, but for just this moment, you chose to relax to his touch.

"Nyrra once said that we'd be fitting for each other, you know?" you bit your lip. "She said she'd be the ringbearer if we ever got married. And I believed her."

Diaval stopped stroking your wings for a moment. "Do you miss her?"

"Her as I knew, yes. Memories, yes. But not her. The real her. No." you swallowed. "What she did... it feels like I can never let go... even if I try. I have so much hate in me, fairies shouldn't hate anyone. What if I'm becoming bad?"

You took in a deep sigh as Diaval started to stroke your wings again, picking the bad feathers off and you just lied there in silence, watching the setting sun.

"Y/N, the Mistress had hate in her for a long time too. She almost killed Aurora because of it, but she got a redemption. Hate is normal. You're not becoming a Dark Fairy because of it." Diaval fell silent for a bit. "Nobody is perfect. That's what makes you special. And you're strong, you'll get through those thoughts."

You were silent for a bit, before you mustered up a smile and looked up to your favorite raven. He smiled back at you - and that moment of affection and talking was everything you needed on that moment.