TW: Mention of cutting and cursing

(Micheal's POV)

     It's a Monday. I'm walking though the halls,on my way to my next class listening to three little birds Bob Marley.I haven't cut in 3 weeks(I mean with lots of threats from Rich and Jake but...same difference)and I'm almost eating correct proportions of food again. Jeremy and Christine are sitting with me a lot more too! And I started drawing and programming again!(and reading) And sleep is a thing I can do without pills or crying, I legitimately forgot how that felt. My thoughts were interrupted when a hand grabbed me and yanked me into a room.

    The detection room. Our school has several. Only 2 are ever used during the day though.I looked around for the magical hand,but instead I found Christine.

    "Hey Chris"I greeted shooting her a smile and pulling down my headphones.Me and Christine are actually really good friends believe it or not.

    "Hey Mikey" Christine said. Nick names are common in this group. Tying to be sympathetic? Try adding y or ie at the end of it( or if your dating.) I'v got Mike,Mikey, and Micha(Micah). 

    "Ok so I don't have much time to explain but,I'm braking up with Jeremy!" Christine said.It was rushed and fast but I understood.

    "What!!YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!" I realized I was yelling. "Sorry" I said. "Well this will be good for both of us OK. I recently found out that I'm Asexual so Jerry won't have to be denied sex anymore.And you get a second chance. "It took a moment for it to sink in.

    "Well" I stared "it's great you found out that your Asexual and all but He really loves you" I said. Christine pitched the bridge of her nose.

    "No he doesn't It was a school yard crush Michael, even if he does love me now he won't later... it's for the best. And I'm pretty sure he's crushing on you anyways." She said. I was going to retaliate saying there's no way he could ever like a loser like me but before I could Christine grabbed my forearm and dragged me back out into the hall. She took a few steps before letting go and started jogging.

    "Bye Mikey!" She called as she ran off to class. And left me there dumbfounded.

    At lunch I Sat my regular table to think stuff over.(Rich and Jake convinced me to sit at there table, with the SQUIP squad.)Then Jer and Chris came over.

    "Hey Micha" Jer greeted.  Now recently I'v noticed how He seems to blush and stutter a lot more around me then he used too,he also seems to zone out looking at me. And we've actually got stuck just staring at each other before. So what's up with that?

    "Hey ya Jer" I replied making a song reference.(AN: I will follow whoever gets that reference and congrats you have good music taste) Jer chuckled and sat down."So how was your day?" I asked. I could not get the thought out of my head that later he was going to be heartbroken. I wanted to say something but Chris was staring dangers at me so I keep quite.

    "Awesome!!" Jer exclaimed. Then he leaned in to my ear and lowered his voice to a whisper while I silently thanked the lords for my dark skin to hide my blush."Chrisy let me make out with her this morning! " he exclaimed. I felt petals conger inside me shit,shit,shit! Not now! Still, I let out a little laugh. When Jeremy pulled away he was smiling brightly.He leaned back in.

    "She usually makes me wait till after school for that!!" You could hear his little evil smile in his voice. Cute!Fuck the petals!! "Umm... I'm just gonna run to the bathroom." I said. "K Mikey" Jer said. Chris gave me a sympathetic look knowing why I was going to the bathroom.

    The second I got into the bathroom petal's rushed up I ran into a stall not bothering to lock it and started trowing it hurt like hell, no I didn't have thrones but I hate trowing up in general so I started crying while I did it.

                                                                                  Flashback

        I let Christine take him to 1 party and now hes trowing up his guts!!!! She takes him out and then just drops him off here!! OH. MY. GOD!! Still I got to help him. Jeremy dry heaved a few more times before leaning back on me. I hesitantly put my arm around him and rubbed his arm.

    "Hey Mikey?" Jer said

    "yea Jer" I replied wondering what was coming.

    "D... Do you hate me?" He asked, you could hear the fear and sadness in his voice.

    "No Jer, of course not!" I said somewhat shocked at the question.I reached out and grabbed some toilet paper and raped it around my hand before ripping it and wiping off Jeremy's mouth with it.

    "Thanks Mikey" Jeremy said voice horse. I need to ask,

    "Why would you think that?" Am I that bad of a friend? I

    "I'v been having nightmares of the SQUIP , and it tells me you hate me... and in some..." his voice got teary."Y-You even H-Hit m-m-me" he said as tears rolled down his face.

    "No,No,No I would never!" I reassured.

    "I know Mikey" Jeremy said sleepy.He turned to me and buried his head in my chest and then his breathing evened out.

Flashback over

    "Michael?" A voice asked. I recognized the voice as Jeremy's.Oh no,no,no I cant stop throwing up now!!! I oped my eyes and saw all the blood and petals coming out of me. Jeremy's going to F. I. L. P. "MICHAEL!?!?!" Jeremy said voice panicked and worried.I begin dry heaving into the toilet and then I felt an arm around my back."Oh my god Micha!!! Are you OK!!??"tears were steaming down my face.

    I pulled away from the toilet and leaned into Jeremy he cupped my cheeks and looked at me his eyes went over my face and landed on a stream of blood flowing down my chin. More panic rose in his eyes "ON MY GOD MICHAEL WE HAVE TO GET YOU TO THE HOSPITAL!!!" He yelled. I quickly wiped my mouth with my sleeve.

    "Calm down!" I said as I put my hands on his shoulders. Jeremy had started but hyperventilating. "Deep breaths,here mach my breathing .In...out...in...out...in" I continued this until Jeremy was breathing normally again.

    Jeremy looked in the toilet and saw the blood and flower petals and his eyes  went wide. "Michael what is this?!" Jeremy questioned. I thought about it for a second.I don't have to tell him it's him I like,I can just tell him what it is... Here (Heere) goes nothing.

    "Hanahaki "I said.

    "What?" Jeremy asked.

    "The Hanahaki disease is a sickness caused by one sided love,the victim's throat will fill up with flower petals of which the victim will cough up or throw up flower petals". I said,I had that definition memorized.Jeremy looked in disbelief and like he was about to cry.

    "Your in love with someone and didn't tell me?" He asked, he sounded really hurt. "Yea" I said guilt clear in my voice "Can it kill you?" He asked suddenly sounding panicked.

    "1 month and 2 weeks" Jeremy looked heartbroken. "To live?" He asked. Before I could respond He asked another question "Is there a cure?" He asked panic clear on in his voice. I

    "Ya, if the love is reciprocated"  I explained, not telling him about the surgery, he'll make me get it.

    "Well who is it?" He asked . The question I'v been dreading. Well only one option now. "Come on Jer, let's get back to lunch." I said standing up. I

    "No no no,not with you throwing up blood! And you didn't answer my question." He paused. "Who is it?" He asked again. I shook my head, if only he knew

    I'v always been one for story's. Magical lands with gobbles and fairies. I'd always been one to get stuck in my own head. It's why I write story's, code, and draw so much.I make my own little world, and it goes how I want it to. And I love exploring the world's of others,  too,books and video games and things like that are the way I escape. Sometimes I imagine a world where Jeremy could actually likes me back.

     I didn't answer for a while and Jeremy seemed to give up on that question and asked another, taking my hands in his. "Is there any other cure?" He asked. No. Way. I'm not telling him about surgery he'll force me to get it and over half the people who get it lose  there emotions and as much as I hate my emotions its what makes living, living. And I don't want to lose my feeling's for him. Its good in a twisted pained sorta way, I'm not getting the surgery.

    "Look Jer, I'm working on it...can we just get to lunch?" I begged.

    "Are you gonna be ok?" He asked, eyes, helpless yet some how full of hope.

     "Of course" I reassured him. I realized we were still holding hands. And started blushing, surprised no more pelts came up. But so did Jer. "Come on" I said I led him out the stall and to the bathroom door where I let go ... Before walking out. My last thought? Well now my hands are cold.

    We got back to the table and sat down and just to make sure he thought Chris didn't know I gave him this look of don't say anything. It worked. And the rest were of lunch was fine. Or until the end. Christine pulled me aside and told Jeremy to go wait down the hall. 

    "Did you throw up in the bathroom?" She asked. "Yea" I emitted. "And he saw? "She asked,"Ya he saw. And also,what did you say about youuu and Jerrrr not having slash you denying him sex earlier?" I asked stretching out certain words.

    "Well... I'm like Asexual soooo I haven't been OK to have sex with him yet." She said nervously fiddling with her fingers. "Oh and" She put her arms up and moved he wrists in her direction, signaling she wanted me to bend down so she could tell me something 'super secret'.I bent down and she leaned into my ear. "Also I think I would have probably of had to I be top." I burst out laughing. "Like think about it!"  She said. I looked down the hall at Jeremy.

    "He's my bottom" I said jokingly. Christine laughed. "Mhmm" she hummed in conformation. "Soon be will be." She said.

     "Pfft. I was joking!!" I said ,flustered "Sure!" She said before skiping back down the hall to Jeremy.

    After school Jeremy approached me at my locker. "Hey Micha" Jeremy chirped.  I

    "Sup Jer." I said with a bro nod.

    "So I was thinking maybe we could finally finish level 9?" He suggested.

    "hmmm" I hummed. "Why the sudden interest?" I asked.

    "Because we haven't played in forever??" He said shooting me a smile that made my heart melt.

     "Because Christine told you too?" I asked but it sounded like a statement.

    "Noooo." He said, holding out the 'o'. "Only half of it was that." He said giving me the pouty face.

    "Hey Jerry!" Christine called as she ran up to us. "Can I talk to you for a sec?" She asked as she begin walking beside us.

    "OK" Jeremy replied seemingly nervous and  confused. They walked into the bathroom and Jeremy asked me to wait for him. I put up my headphones for privacy. I thought about how Jeremy is going to cry later...And I'm going to have to help him. UGGG!! I hate,hate ,hate seeing him cry!! He'll need someone though and so I'll be there for him.

    A few minutes later Jeremy came out the bathroom. Jeremy's eyes were already glossed over with tears. "You OK bud?" I asked

    "Yea" He replied.

    "You sure?" I asked raising my eyebrow, eyeing him.

    "YES!!" He snapped. "Ok" I said looking down, I don't take yelling well let's just leave it at that. Jeremy looked guilty.

    "Sorry" He mumbled.

    "Want to go to my place?" I offered, coming out of my hurt trance. "Please" Jeremy said his head hung. I hated to see him so hurt, he looked like a kicked puppy. He was happy earlier. We began walking in complete silence. Jeremy looked really sad so I put an arm around him for comfort. (I do best in physical) He tensed for a second, before leaning into my touch. Using me to support him as if I removed my arm...He would fall.

    We got to my house and I took my arm  off from around him and unlocked the door. I let Jeremy in first.I turned around to close/lock the door but by the time I turned back around Jer already had tear streaming down his face. His cardigan was falling off one of his shoulders and his backpack was off one arm being held up by his slightly bent elbow.

    "Jer" I said sympathetically letting my backpack fall lazily to the ground then I held my arms open offering a hug. He lunged forward wrapping his arms around me,hugging me tight.

    I helped him down stairs(Into my basement)And sat him down on a beanbag. He began ranting about how he loved her and how now the SQUIP'INCEDNT was for nothing. It hurt to listen to him rant about how he loved her, but he needed someone to talk to. I pulled out a joint(I pre-roll them when I'm bored) I can't remember why but I did though. Jeremy reached out grabbing for the joint as I took a drag.

     I don't let  Jeremy smoke for a reason. When Jeremy get high he gets  very  flirty. He will try to kiss anything and one time kissed a pineapple.(honestly he tried to full on make out with it) Now he has kissed me before. When and after I liked him. Now we've never actually talked about these incidents. When I try to bring It up he always shuts it down. Sometimes he wouldn't talk to me for weeks.I held it out of his reach.

    "Please, please, please, Mikey." Jeremy begged.

    "No" I said, strictly. Jeremy crossed his arms and put out his bottom lip while giving me puppy eyes. "Not gonna work Jer." I said lowering the joint thinking Jer gave up. Then he snatched it from me and before I could take it back he put it to his pretty little lips and inhaled the chemicals. Well no going back now. I guess He needs this, I'll let him.

    An hour later Jer is high off his ass, we're playing Mario kart  when Jeremy's character suddenly stooped moving. I turned to him and he was just staring at me I started back I probably have heart eyes by now. We just stared at each other for a little while. Then Jeremy suddenly moved forward and our lips connected. My eyes went wide but I quickly kissed back. I could feel electricity flow though the kiss and our lips fit together like jig saw pieces it was perfect and I was enjoying it.

    That was... until I realized what I was doing. I tried pulling away but he followed me and threw one of his legs over mine so he was straddling me at my waist. I put my hands on his chest and gently pushed him away. He looked at me for a second.

    "What are you doing?" I asked.

    "Kissing you" Jeremy replied normally with a smug look on his face.

    "Why?" I asked, confused.

    "Because I like you silly." He said smiling at me. He gave me a pack on the lips. He's just high, I told myself.

     "But your straight." I reminded him. "Well to me you are too" He shot back wrapping his arms around my neck and leaning in so are faces were inches apart. Damn he makes a good argument when high, no more nerves I guess. (I had not came out yet at the time) it

    "And you believe that?" I asked raising an eye brow.I

     "No...but you believe I'm straight?" He asked me

    "Well yaeh" I replied. He did his damn adorable giggle. "I thought you knew me better than that" He flirted, tracing circles in my chest though my hoodie. "Well I'm BI soo" He giggled and my heart melted. And for a second I  believed it then I remembered that he was high.

    "Well tell me that when your not high" I said. "Well ask me then for now I want to keep doing this" he said. He kissed me again, if this is what he wants.

We made out till my Mom's got home.I walked him home and left with a mixture of guilt and hope.

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AN:Another chapter. Long as hell but still hope you enjoyed!! Also I do not own tree little birds.

Edit: I know that if your asexual you can still have sex for like your partner or whatever but Christen doesn't actually like Jeremy it one of her excuses and doesn't want to have sex in the first place.

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