Listen to Slow Down by Selena Gomez

Stella Davis

As I slipped into the water and waited for Meera to join me, I began to wonder if Chad was right.  

Look, he'd said.  She hasn't divorced her husband even after years of emotional detachment. Do you really think she'll let him and her son go for you?

Why hasn't Meera divorced him yet if she no longer liked him?  

Even if she never felt the need to divorce him so far, would she do it for me now?

When Meera had waddled through the pool to the spot where I was resting, she surprised me by kissing me squarely on the mouth.  Our goggles clinked with each other.

It only took milliseconds to feel the butterflies in my stomach. 

"Oh, wow!" was all I could muster when she moved back.  "What was that?" I breathed, blushing.  

Meera winced beside me, shaking her head as if her brain in the wrong place.  "I'm sorry.  I'm just so stressed right now."  Her long fingers pressed at her temple.  

"Stop apologizing to me," I moaned, wrapping an arm around her bare hand.  "Nikhil's still upset with you?" 

"Mmm.  He wouldn't pick up my calls."

I leaned on her shoulder apologetically.  "Give him some time.  How's...Ranjit?" 

When she didn't reply, I looked up at her pained face.  Even if I couldn't see her eyes under her goggles, I knew exactly how her eyebrows must be tightening.  

I've seen it way too many unpleasant times on her pretty face.  

When she opened her mouth, she spoke in a monotone.  "He finds every opportunity to lash out at me.  And speaks as if I had been the rude parent all along." 

I sighed beside her.  

Then why don't you just let him go?

"Swim a little.  I know it helps you relax." 

_

When we'd swam a good number of laps in practice and had changed into dry clothes, we headed out to her car.  By this time, she'd realized that something was bothering me.  

"Are you okay?" she asked when we were inside her car.  The scent of the car freshened consumed me as I continued to dry my hair with my towel.  

I tried to smile.  "Yes.  Why?" 

She stared at me doubtfully for a minute before answering.  "You were really quiet today." 

I shrugged in an attempt to hide my trouble.  "It's nothing.  Let's go home." 

As she drove, I stared outside the window, making sure I was facing away from her.  I didn't want to show her how I felt.

I didn't know how long our secret relationship would last if she isn't serious about it.  My heart felt heavier at the thought of Meera only seeing me as a mere affair.  I clenched my teeth, scolding myself to stop thinking.

Her hand found mine on the central console as she drove.  It felt so natural, so right that it almost hurt.    

I had fantasised about taking this to the next step with Meera, but I felt restless that I didn't know what was in her mind.   

When the car halted in front of her house, I stepped out and prepared to say goodbye.  

But before I could, she jumped out of the car and ran towards me.  Her eyes glinted, accompanied by what looked like a mischievous smile.  "You want to come inside?" she asked, her restive eyes fleeting momentarily at her house.  "Ranjit isn't home." 

I examined her face that hopefully stared into me.  I pursed my lips, slowly nodded.  

Meera let out a small squeal before grabbing my wrist and dragging me through the front door.    

The lights were quickly switched on and before I knew it, Meera's lips were on mine again. 

Impulsively, I kissed her back, my mouth moving longingly on her smooth lips. 

Meera made me feel.  Meera made me feel everything.

Her fingers slipped inside my shirt and grazed my skin, shooting goosebumps on my back.  I hungrily pulled her closer, my lips slipping to the side of her neck.  I was starting to feel the steam of her touch.  

The hot moan that escaped her mouth when I sucked on her neck made me lose my mind.  

Meera!

Soon, she had unbuttoned the first two buttons of my shirt and had pushed me onto the couch.  Her lips claimed mine again as she climbed up on my body, our hearts beating off each other's chest like wild, uncontrollable beasts.  

Her shirt scooted up a little and I reached for her burning skin underneath as she pantingly slipped her hands inside my sweatpants.  

Everything was happening too fast.  

Her gentle grinding on my hip, her wet hair falling on my face, me holding her waist firmly down to me. 

I felt euphoria in my gut, scary but exciting.  

But when her fingers brushed the wet folds of my sex, my nails sunk deeper into the skin of her waist, stopping her.  "Wait, Meera!  Wait!" I squawked, breathless.  

Her eyes widened and the panic in her face was evident when she retrieved her hand off my pants.  

"What's wrong?" she breathed, still sitting on me.  

"I-ugh.  Oh God," I heaved, closing my eyes to get back my breath.  "Meera?  Can I ask you something?" 

She nodded, her cloudy eyes roaming over every curve of my body, quite not revived from the excitement.  

I gulped, bracing myself for her reaction.  "What am I to you?" 

A confused frown fell on her face.  "What?" 

"What am I to you, Meera?" I repeated.  

She furrowed her eyebrows, slowly slipping off me and stiffly sitting on the remaining space on the couch.  "What do you mean?  You're...Stella." 

I propped myself up, pulling my pants higher.  "Yes, I'm Stella," I grumbled, looking straight at her.  "But I'm Stella to everyone.  What am I to you?"

She slowly seethed out of her daze.  "Hey?" she scowled, her voice cautious and delicate.  "Where is this coming from?" 

I stared into her dark eyes, shaking my head with a broken look.  "I'm not special to you, am I?" I sighed, a betrayed smile taking over my face. 

Why does it feel like I knew this all along?

"What?" she cried.  "Don't be absurd.  Of course, you are special to me." 

"I'm not!" I said in my smallest voice, bowing my head down.  "I know you're going through a lot with Nikhil and Ranjit, but I don't want to be just a distraction to you.  You'll leave me when your husband finds out.  You'll be ashamed of me.  And you haven't even divorced him even if you don't like him." My words came out more tormented than it felt. 

This was so humiliating.  I bit my tongue to stop myself from breaking down.  I felt like a toy a child plays with, only when it's sibling isn't home. 

I felt like a useless pest.

"Stella!" She shot up, coming to stand in front of me.  Her voice vibrated in my ear, painfully reminding me of what I've become.  She put a finger under my chin to lift my face up towards her.  Her eyes were twisted in pain, filled with hurt and emotion.  "Why are you saying these things that aren't true?"  

I slowly stood up too and brushed past her towards her door.  I couldn't bear to see her tortured face, especially since I was the one inflicting the pain on her.   I knew that Meera was an emotional person and I knew that she really liked me.  

But...

I turned around to her collapsing features.  "I don't want to be your dirty secret."

I stepped out into the sun and left. 

Please vote and make me smile.

Lookout for another update in a few hours (sorry if I can't make it.  And yes, I really want to know what's happening between Diane and Simon)

Question:  Would you rather be covered in syrup for a day or wax tour entire body?