Listen to Princesses Don't Cry by CARYS

Diane Jewel

"Would you rather marry a blue whale or a guinea pig?" Simon asked, skipping behind me as I walked in the hallway.   The entire college was a lively buzz since it was the last day before the summer holidays. 

"What?" I turned around and scrunched my nose in revulsion.

His white lab coat that had an acid hole on the collar flew around him as he rushed to catch up with me.  His hazel eyes glistened under his lab goggles.  I inhaled sharply at the sight of him.  My lips parted.  

And for a hazy second, I forgot where I was.  

"Dy," he caught my shoulder with one hand and gently shook.  "Stop staring at me and answer my question." 

I blushed in awkward shame.  I quickly cleared the lump in my throat to reply. "Neither.  I want to marry a human, like everybody else who's not a psycho."

"You have to pick one," Simon smirked.  "And also, I pick the guinea pig. That doesn't make me psycho."  He dumped the little stack of books he carried in my free hands.

"Yes, it does."

We turned around to walk out of the college building.  He freed himself from the lab coat and threw it on the pile of books.  The goggles followed.  

"Stop throwing your junk at me," I said, balancing his stuff as carefully as I could.  

"Pick one.  Guinea pig or whale?" 

"Why are you so stubborn?  Okay, fine.  Whale." 

He flashed a victory smile at my surrender.  

I put my tongue out at him.  

"I knew it.  You choose whale for its seven-foot penis."

"What? Nooooo," I argued as he laughed and put a casual arm around me.  My immediate instinct was to pull away from his, but somehow I liked this.  I had warmed up to Simon in the past couple weeks and I did not wish to ruin whatever spark the connected us.  "I didn't even know they had such long penises.  Anyway, it won't fit inside me even if I tried to fuck one." 

Simon chuckled at my graphic depiction.  

I stopped when we passed a gang of the sports guys and their girlfriends by the cafeteria.  My eyes automatically searched for Lena.  And sure, she sat in the middle of the group, possessing all their attention as she animatedly described something to them.  

A weak smile 

Simon nudged me.  

"You go on, Simon.  I have talk something important with Lena."  

"Alright, bye.  I have to collect my stuff from the locker too.  Also, you look cute in that outfit." 

My eyes dropped down to my black jacket and the shorts above the stockings.  "I wear this all the time."

"Yeah, that's what I'm saying.  You look awesome every day." He smiled, turning around to leave.

"Wait!" I stopped him.  "Aren't you forgetting something?" 

He turned to face me with a confused look.  What? his eyes asked.  "Ugh..." He inched closer, still puzzled as to what I was expected.  With an almost invisible smile, he planted a quick kiss on my forehead before turning around to rush off.  

Oh god!  Did he think I wanted a goodbye kiss?

"Nooo," I yelled.  "Not that!  Take your junk with you." I referred to his textbooks and lab coat he left behind with me.  

Without turning around, he shouted, "Can't.  Bring it to my house tomorrow. Let's hangout." 

Even if I wasn't seeing his face, I could imagine the nonchalant grin on his face.  

Smooth plan, Simon!

Waving a goodbye behind his back, I walked towards Lena's group.

"Lena.  Can we talk?" I uncertainly called, my legs shifting from one to another.  An uncomfortable expression passed her face before she stood up and made her way to me.  She wore Jason Ziegler's football jacket.   

When I felt the popular students' eyes on me, I hung my head down to make myself invisible.  As I waited for her, I noticed that my black boots had gotten dirt and mud on it again.

It's been almost two weeks since we even talked like friends. She was deliberately ignoring me and I finally made myself accept reality to confront her now.

And when we crossed the two-week mark, I knew that we'll never be the same again. 

We would no longer hang out in our favourite spot by the water fountain and the rose bushes.

"Hey, D!" She came smiling at me.  It felt strained.

"Lena," I locked eyes with her, going straight to the point.  "Why are you ignoring me?"

"What? No!" she giggled as if I had told her the earth was flat.  "I was just giving you time alone with Simon."

"No, you're not," I barged in a tone of finality.  "Ever since you got along with the jocks, you don't seem to remember me."

I waited for her reply, but she kept mum.  She hung her head to stare at the gravel beneath us.  Her actions said it all.

So it is true, isn't it? I got stranger-zoned.

"Look, Len!  I don't care whom you're friends with.  These guys..." I motioned at the gang behind her.  "They look fine.  They seem like nice people.  But just don't push me away without a word." I flinched in surprise at the agony in my voice.  

"D, I'm sorry," she started.  "I don't...know what to say to you."

"I just want you to be happy, Lena.  Do you understand?  We've been friends for four fucking years and you think I'll judge you for making friends with other groups?" 

"See, Diane," Lena shrugged and dived into an explanation.  She finally decided to shed her mask.  "We two are really different people.  We have interests that are complete opposites.  I know we made it work so far, but..." she took a deep, harrowing breath, preparing to spill it. 

We can't be friends anymore.  That's what she wanted to say.  I saw it in her guilty eyes.  

My heart slammed in my chest when the intensity of the truth rubbed on me.   

"Wait," I warned.  "Don't say it."

Betrayed, that's what I felt like. I shook my head in disbelief, stepping back from her.  

She pursed her lips with guilt.  In that instant, her eyes saturated with pity.  

Pity for me.  

I felt like crying.  After all this time, she just wants to dump me?

"I just..." I tried to tell her what I initially wanted to tell her, but my voice broke.  My heart felt ripped and injured as if she'd sent a thousand vultures to tear it down.  "I just wanted to tell you that I got a job."

Lena's eyes pity-lighted up.  "What is it?  I'm so happy for you."

"In the strip club downtown," I replied, wiping angrily at the water that began to pool at my eyes.  

Stop it, Diane, I scolded myself.

I didn't want to cry in front of her.  I didn't want to let her, especially her, see me vulnerable.  

"Oh?" I saw a flash of surprise in her eyes.  "As a waitress?" 

My dull eyes locked with hers.  "No.  As a stripper, Lena." 

Lena took a step back, her eyes widening to the size of a copper coin.  Her expressions changed from confusion to disgust in ticking moments. 

My eyebrows wrinkled in surprise at her reaction.  I wasn't expecting her to be disgusted.  She was the one who's always had a knack for getting things done by seduction.  In fact, I believed she'd just come and hug me and jump in excitement.  

But "What the fuck?" was all that came out of her mouth.  She kept repeating it until my frustrated voice stopped her.

"Lena!" I whispered in anger.  "I'm just a stripper.  Why are you so repulsed?"

"Jesus, Diane?" Slowly, her confusion cleared and in its place, I saw ridicule.  She laughed at me with mocking dismissal.  "I thought you'll do anything for money, but I didn't know you'll spread your legs for naked men." 

"That's not what I do," I sneered.  "I'm not a prostitute."

"Yeah okay, slut."

Please vote and make me smile.

Question:  Would you rather be in jail for a year or lose a year from your life?