" Cry it out.. "

" Just cry it out baby.. I'm here.. " He whispered softly crossing his arms around her tighter, caressing her head like a baby.

His every word, every pat, every touch felt an encouragement. Absurdly, this encouragement was supposed to make her lose.. and even more absurd, 'Losing' was what she needed then... And that happened !! She lost !!.. She lost that hold.. she lost the control over herself.. she lost the control over her tears. And as those few sobs bursted, the threshold was crossed.. and everything stuffed inside was struggling to come out. Nothing was in her control.. she herself wasn't in her control. Her sobs turned violent with each passing second bringing a sharp pain in his chest as if his heart was being squeezed. His insides were jumping in desperation to do something.. to bring her out of this.. but at the same time he was well aware that he wasn't supposed to bring her back.. he needed to make her go through it.. to cross this path.. for once and for all !!

He wanted her to let everything out the exact way it was coiling up inside her.. Though he didn't knew any solution, he as least didn't wanted to let her feel whatever she was feeling, alone. Only if he realize that he need no solution, he himself was her wonder drug.

He doesn't knew if would do the needful, but it would atleast make her free of the stuffed emotions inside. And that's what happened.. she cried.. she cried it all.. taking out pain, anger, irritation, frustration, dejection, and so much which she doesn't even know a term for...

A while later, her sobs settled down a bit but those streams of tears never stopped.. as if her soul was sucking them from the deepest of corners and pushing them out.

There was a time when tears used to refuse coming to her, realizing that no one was there to even see them.. wiping them off was way too fancy to think !!
And by the time she met Misha, she was used to this.. used to keep it all stuffed inside..

So these unending streams, felt frustrating at the same time.. it felt like her own soul was ditching her.. it was taking advantage of her weak moment.. but only if she realise that it was taking compensations for all the times when she just stuffed up all the pain, anger, complaints inside and made it so heavy that, this had to happen..

His heart was paining at the sight but his eyes felt wrong to even blink.. and holding her in his lap, cupping her other cheek while one was against his chest.. he held her closest.. covering her in all ways possible.. just like a mother would do !!

Meanwhile, he picked up the bottle from the floor, besides the bed. And as he squeezed her gently in an subconscious assurance, she looked up at him and then the bottle he was holding close to her mouth. Making her have water, he found at least her breaths calmer.. but her mental fidgety was intact.

And then keeping the bottle aside, he cupped her cheek back.. making her look at him.. looking deep into those glistening eyes.. maybe to read them or maybe to make them read his.. while his thumb worked on her cheeks.. making her a bit better.. or maybe making himself a bit better !!

And he just doesn't know when did he learnt this softness ?? When did he got so perfect with this language ?? This language where he need not worry about words.. and the eyes speak the loudest !!

And that little encouragement she see in there with everything else was all she needed. She all of a sudden developed an urge to speak, to tell, to shout, to complaint.. for a lot many things.. lot lot many things.. but doesn't know what should be the exact words ??

" M.mujhe.. samajh nahii aaraha... " She mumbled slowly while her words choked through those few words even..

He wasn't expecting that.. He didn't saw anything from her side which would tell that she wanted to speak and he was letting her take her time but only if he knew that even she herself wasn't expecting to speak, not because she needed time or anything.. but... because she herself wasn't aware that she needed to do that.. she wasn't aware how to do that.. She never talked.. never shared !! .. Maybe it was just that protectiveness he gives, which was bringing it all out of her..

" Kucch samajh nahi aaraha Sidharth.. kaise react karu.. kya feel karu.. " And words came with another, little burst of sob.

The hopelessness in her voice was literally making him feel his insides wringing. Her physical feebleness, mental fragility, emotional plight, helplessness, irritation, plead, complaint, everything.. everything which he doesn't want near her was there..

It wasn't just painful for him but fearful also.. Even though she was there.. in his arms right then.. but the fact was, that the things were unsolved.. they might be in their bubble right now but they had to face all that again.. and he doesn't know what was going in her mind regarding that.. Not that he doubt her, but the least he knew was that she was gonna suffer throughout..

" K.kya.. samajh nahi aa raha ?? We.. we can talk to them na.. wo gussa hi hai na.. samjhaenge na unhe.. samajh jaenge... "

And he doesn't know if he was convincing her or himself. He said that, because he actually believed that. They were her parents and he just wasn't able to think anything any other way. He doesn't know if he knows to do that 'convincing' thing.. but he knows that he would do anything for this girl who, forgetting the world behind found her home in his embrace.. while she kept looking at him wondering how to explain him ?? What he knows as 'a family', would even let him believe ??.. Would he understand if she tells him about hers ??

And she closed her eyes tight.. feeling frustrated of those unending streams of tears.. while Sidharth didn't interrupted her and just kept caressing her arm letting her take all the time she wants. A while later, she opened her blood shot eyes.. and another stream came.failing her attempt.. again !!

" Sidharth.. mai.. " She tried speaking but her voice ditched her interrupting her..

And sobering herself, she continued..

" Mai itni choti thi.. emotions bhi nahii samajhti thi tab.. Parr.. dadi aur bade papa jaise dekhte the.. m.mujhe.. samajh bhi nahi aa.ata tha... bass itna samajh aata tha.. ki.. m.mujhe acha nah.hii.. nahii lag raha.. Aur.. Mm.mai saamne nahii jati thi.. un.nke... "

" Wo jo bhi bolte the na.. aadha adhoora sa.. taana.. mujhe samajh nahii aata tha kuch bhi.. parr.. Jaise wo mujhe dekhte the, culprit jaisa feel hota tha.. " She told with a tint of revulsion as if she could still feel that feeling.

" Aur jaise jaise mujhe samajh aane lagi.. unka bolna bhi badhte gaya.. Mummy papa nahi bolte the kabhi.. Na mujhe kuch bolte the.. Na mere liye kuch bolte the.. "

" Waha koi baat hi nahi karta tha.. Mai baithi bhi rahungi side pe aur sab baat karte hote the jaise mai dikh nahi rahi.. Aur firr achanak dikh jati thi unhe agar paani chahiye ya koi kaam bolna ho... "

And by now no strong emotions were to be seen on her face.

" Jab ham Delhi gaye.. waha to dadi aur bade papa bhi nahii the.. firr bhi kuch nahi badla.. "

" Ek din kabhi aisa aajata tha.. ki Mummy mujhse idhar udhar ki baat karleti thi.. meri champi kardiya karti thi.. aur mujhe lagta tha ki abi shayad sab theek.. ab sab aisa hi hoga.. parr firr dadi ya bade papa ka call aate hi....
sab vaise hi ho jata tha.. "

She parted herself a little. And watching her attempt, he helped her to sit straight between his legs . but never left his hold around her..

" Tujhe ptae.. bachpan se.. jabse mujhe samajh aayi hai tabse.. Maine jo bhi kiya hai.. harr choti cheez.. mere subah uthne ke waqt se lekarr harr choti cheez.. harr cheez ke peeche ek single thought hota tha.. ki mai kuch aisa na kardu jo unhe acha na lage.. mai disappoint na kar du unhe.. unki acknowledgment ki desperation itni hogayi thi na.. ki.. harr cheez me maine sirff.. sirff ye socha hai wo kis cheez se khush honge... unhe meri dosti nahi pasand, maine dost nahi banaye.. unhe fizool ka bahar jana nahi pasand.. mai kabhii nahi gayi.. unhe meri school meetings me aana nahi pasand to maine rank lane ke padhna start kiya ki wo proud ho.. aur sabb.. sabb kuch unke liye.. sirf unke liye.. parr.. kuccch nahi hua Sidharth.. nahi padh koi farq.. koi farq hi nahi pada unhe kabhi meri kisi bhi cheez se.. "

" They.. they were family.. we used to live under same roof... parr unhe agar ek baat bolni ho.. ek sawaal puchna ho na.. to.. m.mai kitni baar pehle man me bolti thi.. darr nahii tha.. bas haqq hi nahii laga kabhi.. "

" Mujhe kuch samajh hi nahii aata tha waha.. Samajh hi nahi aata tha rishte kaise hote hai ?? Kyunki hamare ghar me to baate bhi 'zarurat' se hoti thi.. aur usparr meri to fir kisi ko zarurat bhi nahi hoti thi.. "

" Samajh hi nahi aata tha ki sare ghar aise hi hote hai kya ?? Aur agar hote hai to mujhe acha kyu nahii lagta kuch.. mujhe samajh hi nahi aata tha ki mai exactly expect kya karr rahi hu.. jo mai expect kar rahi hu wo practical bhi hai ya.. bas.. bass mere fairy land dreams hai.. "

" Apne hi ghar me ek besharam guest se zada kuch nahi thi mai... Mujhe samajh hi nahi aata tha itna kya bura hai mujme ki koi baat tak nahi karna chahta.. "

And her words literally squeezed his heart which in turn made him tighten his hold. It was the first time she accepted and not reasoned out. And this acceptance brought her a medicine and wound together..

Till then, all he knew was that her parents abandoned her five years ago. He was under the impression that maybe she made some mistake and they were upset and not talking to her.. and mistakes could be forgiven.. but what he just heard was making his insides crumble. What on earth that little girl might have done to get that treatment that she doesn't even knew what she was supposed to expect for herself...
How come each and every person got reasons against a little kid ??

" Your twin ?? " He struggled with himself to not ask but failed.

This question was eating him up.. First, she never mentions that ever and he couldn't believe that a sibling who literally shared everything from first breath can't hate you...

" Usne sath chorh diya isliye to kisi ne diya nahii... "

And her tears stood still in her eyes as if supporting her holded breath. And he was still contemplating when she continued...

" He died.. " She breathed out the words letting those holded tears lose which knew no bounds now.

" Meri vajah se.. dadi bolti thi !! "
And her words sounded more like a complain.. but all he could focus on was that hidden demand.. a demand to just dismiss.. to just repudiate the statement.

Her words crumbled his heart erupting a pain in his chest listening how casually she was telling this.. realizing how 'used to' she sounded with the words. His eyes filled up and he tried wrapping her even better.

" Because I chose to be the elder one.. I was 15 minutes elder to him.. h.he got s.trangled.. in.. there.. he didn't got even his first breath. " He told him struggling through those sobs and even his vision was blurred but he didn't bothered and kept his hands busy to make 'her' better.

" They were told to not expect another child.. maybe.. that that's why they kept me....
It was a better option than being called 'Childless'. "

He was feeling so miserable.. so helpless.. so frustrated !! He didn't wanted to hear but at the same time he wanted to know it all..

" They say.. wo meri jagah hota.. to.. he would have been safe..
I know that...
Parr.. Par.r.. maine.. m.meri.. kya galti usme.. " She pleaded for the answer amongst sobs.

And holding back of her head he took her even closer... hiding her from God knows whom ?? Maybe just those ill- memories.

" Noo.. kya bol rahi hai baby... "
And more than obstructing her to think that way that whisper was a plead to not say ahead.

It was breaking his heart to even hear. How much they have filled this in her mind that, even though she's aware that she wasn't to be blamed yet it was breaking her. All this while she was been punished and put into guilt of something which wasn't anything more than an unfortunate incident..

" They say that !! " She said like a child, complaining, and he pulled his head a little back and cupped her face.

" Koi bhi bole !! You can't take that.. " He told softly wiping off the tears with his thumbs running softly on her cheeks.

With each breath the wheezing sound turned sharper telling her narrow nasal passage and making her fill in more air through her mouth with each consequent breath..

This outpouring was needed but he couldn't ignore that she wasn't completely fine yet.. He picked the bottle again and made her take a few sips..

Her sobs were subsided now but her muffled breath and light hiccups made her keep her lips slightly parted to help her breathe which were trembling all the time.

" Come here.. " He softly made her to lie down.

And laying besides, he spooned her securely, covering themselves with the comforter completely..

" You were never wrong meri jaan.. Never !! ... They weren't just fairy land expectations.. Relationships are like that !! They are meant to be like that.. "

" Agar kisi ne wo nahi samjha that's their problem.. "

And maintaining the silence he let her get calm.. but kept caressing her arm making his attempt of making her better, better.

" Mera bhai hota to mera sath deta ?? " She asked all of a sudden looking out of the balcony.. deep through the moon.

And he felt so helpless waching that hopefulness in her word. He so knew what she wished to hear. Even though any answer was not going to bring any difference to the situation.. but.. maybe just a relief she was seeking through the acceptance of the fact that she was unwanted.. forsaken !!

She was there with him all these days but he never realized that the damage that smiling face was hiding was of this extent. He just couldn't believe that this girl, who he just don't get enough of, was craving for a bit of acknowledgement from the people who gave her existence.. this girl who holds all the love on earth never knew how much of that she should expect for herself.. this girl who became a soul for his world got her own soul damaged by the ones who created her !!

But ' who did what ?? ' wasn't a help. It was about what he would do. And in that very attempt he raised himself on his elbows and cupping her other cheek, he made her turn to him, gaining her attention..

" Usne to tera sath teri life ke sabse crucial part me diya.. He was your first ever supporter.. Apni utni si life me bhi tera bhai tujhe protect karr raha tha.. "

" Think it like that, that he was a God sent, to help you through the way to this world... "

" Hmm ?? "

He himself was not believing this positive approach he was watching within him. He wasn't like this.. he thinks abruptly.. acts abruptly.. beleives abruptly. But the desperation to push her pain away was bringing him every good thing.. As much she makes him insane.. she makes sane too..

" Jo bhi hua usme koi kuch nahi karr sakta tha.. but the least you could do is, Live 'his' life too.. "

And his words felt like a spell, giving her a new light within seconds. And it could be just philosophical explanations.. but still that little positivity made her want to believe it.
Not that he told something which she couldn't think of.. but maybe just because he said this, she felt all those blames, taunts and curses being pushed off..

And covering that little distance, he kept his forehead over her's... making her close her eyes instinctively.

" I got you.. always.. " He whispered in assurance and kissed her eye.

" Alwayss.. " And just strengthened the promise kissing another one soothing them..

And this.. this is what makes everything worthy... This man makes everything worthy. Every suffering.. Every pain.. Every breath.. Every beat.. He just makes her existence worthy !!

Those little hiccups still settling.. and the recent blood circulation was so visible all over her face.. those beautiful eyes looked heavy again.. and those slightly scrunching brows clearly told that her head must be paining, owing to how much she cried..

" Paining ?? " He asked softly rubbing his fingers over her forehead moving those baby hair backwards..

She opened up hearing him but amidst so much of half open packages in her mind, it took her time to recall what he asked and she just managed to nod half-mindedly.

And resting his head down again, he kept rubbing his thumb over her forehead... pressing it gently in between.. trying to make her sleep, while his own seemed nowhere near as her words kept running in his mind.
He was still finding it difficult to believe. Being a public figure, who knows 'hate' better ??
He remember once he told Varun that she won't understand 'Hate for no reason'. And there's the irony, Who'll understand it better than her ??

He couldn't even imagine himself at her place. He atleast gets the hate from outside world, but she gets it from the people who brought her to the world.
And the least he felt relieved with was, that he didn't exposed her to even more.

She atleast feels herself accepted in outside world. Let 'that much' be with her !!

And his thoughts interrupted feeling those little snuggles. He looked down and found this baby clutching the neckline of his tank top trying to keep the warmth of his touch as closest as possible.

" Naaz.. Baby.. Andarr chalee ?? " He asked utterly soft, as if scared to disturb her.
But that's the purpose in the first place.. to wake her up !!

But the draining breakdown had already pushed her to a deep slumber making him drop the thought. And he just stretched his arm carefully and put the blinds on to keep the cold breeze away. Rest, he was there to wrap her..

______________________________________

" What are you doing here ?? " Shreya breathed out the words within those pantings coming to the chair Ankush was sitting... no, almost laid on.

While Vardaan too followed and plopped down on the chair besides Ankush.

" It's been straight TWO hours.. Let me breathe please !! " Ankush pleaded taking one of those little water bottles from the table..

sipping on the water wondering at the energy this girl carries.

" JUST two hours Ankush !! " Shreya countered while

" Dude... " Vardaan called gaining Ankush's attention making him look at him lazily.

" Start working on your stamina ha.. she's disappointed !! " And Vardaan is back !!

Ankush spit-out the water in shock hearing him, and turned instinctively towards Shreya to see if she heard and sighed in relief finding her busy looking around as if inspecting.. and then turned back to this absurd-human, who sat there shamelessly unaffected to Ankush's glares.

" Sanu nahi hai yrr... kitna socha tha hamne... Wo honi chahiye thi.. maza aata.. " Shreya said in disappointment still looking around.

" Ek bhai bhi hai tera.. yaad hai ?? " Vardaan asked amusedly making Shreya look at him.

" Haa.. matlab, dono !!
Ek hi baat hai.. !! " Shreya dismissed in an obvious tone.

_____________________________________

How perfectly they were snuggled into each other elongated the next morning. It was only when the rays got bright enough to make the air across the blinds hot enough for them to be wrapped in a comforter..

As soon as he opened his eyes, he registered his surroundings.. the last night recalled and his eyes moved down towards her in a reflex.

And smiling was the last thing he would have once believed himself doing as the first thing in the morning.. as the sweat bands on her forehead made the reason of discomfort quite clear.. but still in that sleepy attempt she was snuggling into what she knows as comfort. Just a tiny.. simple.. little thing !! But these little things makes him feel so high of himself.. it feels high to hold this place, she calls her solace.. her serenity. It feels high to know how he makes her better through any mess..

He wished to sleep but watching the time, he parted himself softly and got up from the bed. Pushing the comforter away, he let her arms and feets open to the air.. but covering the rest as without it, she will be up in no time..

_____________________________________

A while later he was back with the breakfast and found her inside the room already.. on the couch.. her back resting over the pillows against the armrest with legs up and straight while resting her head against the backrest with eyes still closed..

Keeping the tray on the coffee table, he sat besides her legs, in front of her.. And feeling a touch against her leg, she stirred but didn't woke up. Though she wasn't a deep sleeper but then, morning hours are always an exception !!
And this little baby who found a cozy corner to snuggle in, happens to forget everything undesirable in these sleepy morning hours..

In that moment of adoration, admiration but more of all, gratitude.. a gratitude for holding him worthy of that, he bent slightly down and kissed her hair.. He didn't meant to wake her up.. but that's what he did.. But then that's okay.. because.. Damn that morning view !! Those 'yet sleepy' eyes moving up and smiling at him.. the view which made the day meaningful already.

" Good morning !! " She whispered and god knows why exactly but he just developed a stubborn urge to take few minutes for his own..

And letting her lay on her back he let himself lay over her partially. Digging his face against her neck, he snuggled sneaking in few moments for himself at his home.. And she wonders, does he even know what he makes her feel of herself with just these little things. Her hand reached up and caressed back of his head making him smile against her neck..

" Definately a good morning !! " He mumbled making her smile the widest.

And he needed this !! He badly needed this !!
All this while he had been a rock support to her.. but he can't deny that even he needed her the same way.. this ongoing mess was troubling him.. it was scaring him unreasonably. He was constantly stressed that what would be the final picture after this mess.. how this will end ??

Her health was little more better. The fever vanished, head was light.. It was the weakness she would say and after-effects. But no idea, whether to say it good or not, now as her body was supporting, her mind starting running all around again.

Letting him take his moments of peace, she kept caressing his head when her breakdown from the last night kept flashing her. A part of her still didn't believed that it actually happened. She just couldn't imagine herself saying this much and all that. It all felt like it was a lot she said but at the same time she felt a lot was yet remaining....

But his almost attained slumber and her thoughts, interrupted when their phones lying on the table.. one over other.. just the way their owners were lying, started ringing together.

He sat straight.. handed her her's and checked his. It was the reminder she put on their phones.. so that if she forgets, he could collect the gift they ordered for Raghav and Ankita.

And that's when the realization striked her. She had been literally into a bubble like the outside world doesn't exist. And it was the sudden panic rushed which through her that subsided her weakness and she sat straight hastily cross checking what Day it was..

" It's Wednesday... " She gasped in a state of disbelief gaining Sidharth attention who got confused for a moment.

" Aa.aaj shadi hai... aurr maii.. mujhe hosh hi nahii hai ?? How can I be so stupid.. Itni careless ?? M.mai.. bhul kaise sakti hu ?? Who on earth would not remember such thing ?? " She was already in cold sweat while her fingers scrolling down the contacts, shivering in panic.

" Will you relax ?? You told them na that you were gonna do all the work before the functions and not during the functions.. "

" No no.. it doesn't happens like that.. Maine plan kiya hai to I have to keep a check.. or atleast make someone else lead who know the plan.. Aman knows it but.. still....
Sab kharab hogya.. upar se ye hi function.. ghar ka function tha.. mujhe tujhe.. disappoint.. nahi karna tha.. Maa ko kaisa lagega.. Sab kharab... "

" Chup.. chupp ekdam !! Keep it aside.. "
Her lips zipped but eyes followed the phone like a puppy which he pulled away from her ear.

And in desperation of calming her down, he realized he himself got hyper. And taking a deep breath.. he pulled her softly in front of him.. almost on his lap.. and hugged her..

" Kuch kharab nahi hua hai.. Everything is going fine.. Infact everything is going superbb !! You have managed it all well, Misha herself told me.. Your boss is well informed about everything and Misha is there to fill your place.. And she knows everything, right ?? "

And with the information, he looked down at her to see if that was enough but watching those tension frowns still there on her forehead.. he shaked his head at this stubbornhead.

" Nahi maanegi na ?? " He questioned scoldingly.. but picked his phone simultaneously and called Misha..

" Hey buddy !! All okay ?? Where's she ?? Still sleeping ?? Fever nahi hai na ab.... "

" Hold on.. hold on.. break hai dono behno me koi ?? " Sidharth questioned in wonderment.

" Here.. " And he stretched his arm a little back, taking Shehnaaz into the frame too.

" Kaisi hai tu ?? Theek hai na abb ?? "

" Theek hu.. udhar sab theek hai na.. koi panga to nahii hua na.. mujhe samajh nahi aara mujhe bilkul hi dhyan nahi aaya.. "

" Areyyy chill karr.. everything is going.. infact running good. Sab to set kar rakha tha tune.. tab bhi kuch hoga kaam isliye mai aagyi.. parr free baithi hu.. "

" Aeee Sanu !! " Ankush moved closer in excitement watching them.

" Kaisi hai ?? " He asked and she was so missing this cheery vibe around.

" Theek hu.. " And it came like with so much of innocence bring a involuntary smile to Sidharth.

" Idharr ka tension mat le... kal bhi sab amazing hua... aurr abhi bhi ham itne sare log hai.. to tera to tension lena banta hi nahii hai.. tu chill karr, yaha hai na nalayat sare.. kaam pe lagwata hu sabko.. " Ankush tried lifting her mood, and listening those giggles he smiled for the successful attempt.

" Vardaan theek hai ?? " Sidharth asked in between and sensing the tone 'unusual', Shehnaaz glanced at Sidharth once.

" Yeah.. " Ankush replied and Sidharth felt uneasy that if he was fine, then why didn't he tried calling him yet.. It was so not Vardaan but shrugged the thought for then..

" Maa hai kya udharr ?? " He asked again..

" Maa se baat karni hai ??..
Parrr...
Are you sure tu aise hi baat karega ?? " Ankush questioned and that tinch of teasing made Sidharth confused.

The next few seconds, as his mind ran through his words, his eyes ran over the screen subconsciously. And as his eyes fell at the corner of the screen.. which mirrored their ownselves, he realized the way they were sitting. It was so unbelievable that this man who was such a conscious-head didn't even realized this closeness. This proximity was so natural that they they didn't even noticed until they saw themselves in their own bliss. The sudden consciousness on Sidharth's face and Shehnaaz's attempt to make it decent pulling herself back made Ankush burst out in laugh..

" Acha vaise they are busy in haldi and all ka preparation.. I'll make them talk as soon as it gets done.. "

And keeping the phone down.. he threw his head back.. with a little smile.. with a little blush.
How come he was landing himself into such situations so often these days ?? And over that, how on earth he was enjoying it too ??

" Sidharth !! " She called slowly bringing him back.

" Hmm ?? "

" Shadi me jaenge.. " She said confusing him if it was a statement, question or a demand making him sit straight.

" Nope.. " And the fix answer, for whatever it was !!

" Kyuu ?? " She continued stubbornly and he turned to get the tray knowing well that he won't be able to argue with her for long.. and he didn't wanted to agree at all.

" Brush kiya ?? " He tried distraction. Just an attempt to save himself from giving up to her already..

She nodded but sat still with a face clearly telling that she won't give up.

" You seriously want me to answer ??.. Kal baitha bhi nahi jaa raha tha, aur shadi me jana hai ?? " He said a bit annoyingly.

And taking a spoonful, he put into her mouth not letting her continue, ignoring the faces she was making. No idea whether it was good or not that her taste buds were active now.. but only if he was gonna pay any mercy to them.

" Fine, tu to jaa atleast.. " She stubbornly continued gulping the food.

" Hogya ?? "

" You know that's not happening.. " And put another bite..

" To mujhe leke jaa.. "

And that innocent smartness !! He raised his brows telling her that he knows what she was doing.. An option what she want him to choose and another that she knew he won't choose.

But then, it was more about why she was doing this. He somewhere knew this will come. She will feel bad that he was missing Raghav's wedding. She will held herself guilty.

" Shehnaaz !! Listen !! Khudpe load lene ki zarurat nahii hai.. Mai pehle bhi nahii jata tha yrr koi family functions pe.. " He said softly in a tiny attempt to push the thought out of her mind.

" Haa parr Raghav ke liye tu jana chahta tha !! " She countered like a declaration and he just kept looking at her. She was right but how to make her understand that even if he was missing it.. just the fact that he was missing it for her made it alright.

" Naaz... sab kuch kar lena zaruri nahi hota hai.. now please.. don't argue over this.. Kuch din ki baat hai firr jaha jana hai bolna.. " He said sternly and focused back on the spoon..bowl.. and those tasteless oats.

" Shadi aaj hai.. Firr kya unke honeymoon pe jaenge ?? " Mumbling in her own zone not realizing what she said !! .. But then, he considers it his responsibility !!

And with the last bite, he bent closer and placing his lips over her cheek, his tongue caused the tingles unknowingly making her shiver.. maybe with that intimacy.. or maybe with his next words...

" Jaa sakte hai.. I have no issues !! "

And broke her daze digging those teeth taking a bite of his cupcake..

" Aadmikhor.. " She scoffed rubbing her cheek while he took few seconds to realize what she want to convey.

" Aadamkhor (Man-eater) hota hai gadhi !! " He smacked her head and again recalling what she said, he laughed out loud... and again.. and again.. making him literally fell down in a fit of laughter.

_____________________________________

Parking the car, Sidharth came to her and holding her hand moved ahead making her follow.

Yeahh !! She made him agree !!! Afterall, what he would have done with that fallen face..
And here they were, after a two-hour ride.. no, after a good two-hour long warning sessions throughout the way..

Though in her urge to be with 'her people', she convinced him, but on the other side she had this little uneasiness. A little embarrassment and insecurity..
She didn't even knew what all happened that day at her house. She was scared that would have changed their opinion for her. Although how Maa kept track of her all this while and how Ankush talked to her were enough for an answer..
But then, this stupid mind needs almost nothing to bring insecurity and everything possible to shrug it away..

As they moved through the main gate all covered with fresh floral strings.. they found the frontyard relatively empty considering that a wedding was going to be held at that very place in a few hours. Sidharth was into his phone checking something important while Shehnaaz had her eyes all around with her work mode turned on, back of the mind !!

And even before they get into the house, Shehnaaz's eyes fell on a group sitting at the patio in the corner of the frontyard. She subconsciously took few steps in the direction in attempt to see the faces better and stood still for a few seconds. She felt so stupid of herself for not expecting this already. Not that she was really close yet they were a part of her life once and fortunately or unfortunately they were the brightest side of her life..

" Shehnaaz ?? " She heard a call from the very same direction and that's when she realized that standing there won't help, she need to move.

She looked back at Sidharth once and finding him already caught by some relative and she moved into the direction.

" Long time girl.. How are you ?? " The first girl asked hugging her.

" Ankita told us that you planned her wedding but you were not well.. Are you fine now ?? " Another guy asked.

And Shehnaaz could easy catch that he was confused over how he was supposed to greet her.. and that was obvious. She was sweet to all but considering her parents she never gave anyone any kind of liberty.. so that they doesn't develop any hope from her side. Because at the end she not just feared to disappoint her parents but her friends also. But all that seems to be so meaningless now. And she hugged him as a little gesture of apology.. to no one but herself. But yes, just a side-hug.. she was in no mood to make his baby hulk sulk !!

" I am better now.. How are you all ?? " She replied hugging the rest of them..

They all were Shehnaaz and Ankita's school friends. Though Shehnaaz didn't had a very deep bond with anyone but that's something you don't need with childhood friendships. You don't need to be really close to enjoy each other's company. It's usually like you may or may not be in contact but whenever you meet, it's same !! Shehnaaz fell in a good conversation with them and she realized what actually she missed when she didn't reciprocated their attempts in school days.. but then.. instead of regretting she felt, now could be the time !!

And a moment later, Sidharth's eyes catched her, he didn't knew who they were.. might be her colleagues but why would they stand their all relaxed leaving work.. and the faces looked new.. but then she looked fresh.. relaxed.. and that's what mattered.

" Baith ki bhi to baat kar sakti hai.. " Mumbling in annoyance he moved to her.

" Shehnaaz !! " He called out and she looked at him in a bit shock.

She wasn't expecting this and looking at her, he slightly understood. They were still on the stand of keeping their cocoon away from the world's eyes.

But before they could say anything, a girl standing besides Shehnaaz bent to her ear...

" Tu to famous hogayi hai yrr.. celebrity events and all ha ?? " She murmured and Shehnaaz looked towards her only to find those eyes not ready to leave this handsome face they admired on screen always.

" Hii... " The girl greeted in a complete fangirl moment.

" Hello !! " Sidharth replied feeling a bit awkward to the sudden attention.

" They are my school friends.. " Shehnaaz tried to make the conversation but in turn helping Sidharth only..

He greeted them and got into a little conversation which turned into a picture session soon. Shehnaaz knew the craziness these girls carry for every other cute or hot face from the industry. She stood at a side admiring him. Though the girls were literally in their fan moment but this time Shehnaaz felt good. It's not just jealousy she feels always.. she loves to see him getting loved too.. Yeah, just the intention of the giver needs to be clear to her. And moreover, she would be telling the biggest lie on earth that she wasn't feeling proud that this man who had all the eyes on him, had his own searching for her only.. that this man who had all the attention to him, was glancing at her only in seconds.. As single pictures were done, they all came together for a group picture.. and watching that Sidharth stretched his hand and pulled Shehnaaz softly to him.. bringing her into the frame.. unbothered to who saw and thought what ??
As they say, he wasn't hiding, he just wasn't showing !!

" Okay guys I'll see you around. Abhi I need to go. " Sidharth said with a apologetic face.

" Ahm... Shehnaaz.. Maasi was asking for you !! " He said moving away and a little immediate smile came to her lips. Call it weird or what, but she was feeling so tingly.. weirdly thrilled.. to see him making up lies to take her with him.

And she moved away with him..

" Stress liye bina kaam nahii chal sakta tera ?? Main teri baat maanke le aaya hu idharr but dare you stress yourself.. And I am damn serious. Ek minute nahii lagega vapis gaadi me baithane ko.. " He mumbled warning her while she puckered her lips like a baby getting scolded.

And interrupting his scoldings, Shreya's shriek reached to them, as they stood at the door of the room he knew Maa was in..

" You cameeeee !! " Shehnaaz was already alert as she saw Shreya running towards her.

And all those ill- feelings were out within seconds...

And all of a sudden, she was miraculously better.. as if this was exactly needed to her.. to be here.. with her people. The biggest smile in days bursted and she was all good already.

Within minutes, the air in the room was all chirpy and joyous. She truly was an inextricable part of their souls..

Few minutes after meeting them, Sidharth went to Raghav with Ankush.
He still didn't got to meet Vardaan as Varun and Vardaan were out for some work. This was the longest he didn't talk to him and Sidharth just wasn't used to this.. neither he wishes to be.. ever !!
Sidharth had no idea if all this was because of that inadvertent action of few seconds !!

Shehnaaz too met Ankita and then tried to look around the arrangements but.. she could only try !!

______________________________________

It was almost evening and with the darkness, the hustle was gradually increasing too.

Untill just sometime back, Sidharth had every second named to Shehnaaz.. he had all of her to him only. And here he was.. missing his drug again !! His eyes moved around unattentatively, passing a wave of restlessness inside him which turned intense with every passing minute.. no idea whether because of this 'addiction', what he would call.. orr.. he was still overcoming the abnormal uneasiness her absence brings.

And just then, his eyes crossed the view.. which processed a second later making his eyes shift back in a jerk where it desired to be...

And in that moment, A part of his is numb while the rest was just regretting to bring her here. In that moment, he want nothing and no one around.. And just sit and fill in that view which was making him feel, so much.. so freaking much !! But then, didn't he got the view only because he brought her here ??

He just can't define that moment.. She was taking his breath away and he just couldn't define, How ??
That look of her just lit something inside him..

It was so crazy that this woman manages to freeze this cold man, and put life into him at the same time.. that she happens to be his breath, and she only make it stuck.. that she happens to be his beat, and she only makes it ditch him..

But what was crazier, that this wasn't about how paradisal she looked.. this was something much much more.. something making him feel something really intense but undefined.. This was something making his heart swell.. literally !!

" Bass kar bhai !! ... Itna to bride conscious nahi hogi, jitna tune use karr diya hai... " Ankush mumbled chuckling, without even looking at Sidharth.

Sidharth heard but god knows what go into him that his eyes refused to even blink.. left alone move !!

She was standing all dolled up in his Maa's Saree.. and over that.. Saree which was gifted by his father..
He had no idea if he was feeling a lot.. It might be a little things for others.. But such little things brings him such an intense emotion which turns his insides insane..

And like everytime, she got the urge to see herself in his eyes but couldn't even dare to look up at him knowing how her traitor cheeks were red already..

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