I'm still shaking. I'm still sad. My mom voted and my dad voted. And we thought it would work out but apparently no.

I'm sorry to those I may upset with my words. I'm just trying to let the people that don't understand how this is going to affect people like me or aren't in the US and need a perspective from someone that is.

. . . . . . . . .

I turned on the TV for CNN, ready to watch Hillary get her game on demolish. She needed this because she's run twice and this was her last shot. She's getting older y'know, and I'm not even putting her down as a woman. It's just a general statement. At one point, the stress is going to get too much at a certain age. Just look at Obama!

So I'm waiting for those first numbers. And waiting. 

God, CNN takes forever with releasing projections . . .

But yeah, the first round comes out, and I'm feeling good. I'm feeling confident. She's going as the projections say.

Then the second bout's not that good.

And not the one after.

Or after that. 

Not even this one.

Yeah, there was a good state or two like Illinois or California. But it was mostly heartbreaking.

And at one point in the night, I think you could hear a collective amount of American hearts, illegal or legal, just break. 

It was just too late. He had a lead to great and you could see Van Jones on CNN just about try to hold back his tears. If a grown man is holding back his tears, there's a problem.

I know there are some of you that are happy. But hear me out, you're probably not me.

Yes, I'm pulling out the race card. Take a good long look at this shiny, black beauty.

I'm a black girl, with a Muslim name and parents that immigrated here. I may not be Muslim, but Trump will find a way. I may have been born in Chicago, but Trump will find a way.

I'm terrified for our future and the country right now. Our parents, older siblings, everyone older than a good portion of us, just voted for a xenophobic, homophobic, racist, sexist pig. And people are cheering. Or their turning a blind eye. And you know what, they're mostly white, well off people. 

Your definition of well off may be different but I think well off is when you don't know your parents' (or parent in my case) credit score off the top of your head and are thinking about getting a job to help the family. And selling off some stuff because hey, every little thing counts.

So yeah, America went full Brexit 2.0. I'm afraid for everything. A lot of what I'm afraid for, I can't even put into words. The progress black people have made with Obama will be just about decimated with Trump's orange face becomes the new thing you see when you look up president of the free world. Same for the LBGTQIA+ community and the Muslims. And why people can't see this. I. Don't. Know.

We may have had problems before, but to ignore them and add more or something of the like is just as scary as seeing Trump in the White House. 

I haven't even gotten to the fact that he doesn't have any political experience. Or that he contradicts himself. Seriously, the world is coming to a serious crisis but we can't even look ourselves in the mirror to start the healing.

If you want to talk in more depth with me if you have any problems about what I said or have questions or whatever, you can always PM me or put it down in the comments.

Good luck, America. We need it.