aeri's •

after leaving my bag beside the desk, i plopped down on the bed and touched my heart.

wow, today was such a good day.
meeting my idols? sounds really far and unachievable even though i live in seoul.
not everyone has enough spare cash and time to afford a fanmeet ticket ok.

while hanni was still in the toilet cleaning up, i walked over to my bookshelf, maybe i can just write a quick entry with all the details so that i keep it documented for as long as i keep this diary.

sitting down at my desk, i flipped open the book.

...wait. why is the book so clean?
i flipped a few more pages.

SHITASTIC.

i closed the book and opened again.
okay. maybe it was just my eyes.
okay. stay calm. stay calm aeri.

3..2..1
i flipped it open again.

oh. shit.

" HAAAAANNNNNNNI, "

oh my god. oh no. oh no. oh no.

" WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT, ARE YOU DEAD? " she came running into the room with a towel around her head.

" oh nO hanNI SHITAKE MUSHROOMS I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO, " i ran towards her. " SEND HELPPPPPP, "

" okay. calm down. calm down. tell me what happened, " she tried to calm me down, sat down on my bed and pulled me beside her.

i stood up, still panicking like mad internally.

" look at this, " i passed her the empty book.

" isn't this your diary? the one you nearly whacked me for opening? now you're asking me to open it? " she looked at me as if i was a living joke, which by the way was what i was feeling right now.

" just, " i breathed. " open it. " i wanted to dig a hole right at the moment and sink into the face of the earth and never appear again.

" wow, sharing your dirty secrets with me after years of friendship eh? " she smirked and flipped open the book.

her eyes widened.
" uhhh, you write your diary with invisible ink or what? " she flipped a few more pages.

" ....oh no. " we looked at each other.

" you... gave your book to your man? " she asked me slowly

" what my man??? HE IS GOING TO CRINGE TO DEATH, " i hid my face in my palms.

" ugh. how could i have been so careless? i thought i was very sure i gave the clean one to him! " i was about to tear up.

" all my memories and photos are inside, it's literally my book of memories, " my voice cracked and she pat my shoulder.

" looks like i'll never get it back now, ".

—

yoon's •

i plopped down onto the sofa in the resting room at the back of the fansign venue, i was so tired that i was about to just close my eyes and take a power nap right on the spot.

just then, mino came bouncing in carrying an armful of fan gifts which caught my attention.

he sat down beside me and placed some of his gifts on his lap. there were gifts of all colours, pink, blue, black, you name it, it's all there.

i tried to take one of the pink letters that stood out before i even reached it a whack came right at my hand.

" hey! don't touch my letters, they're mine. go open yours, " mino stuck his tongue out at me and i just rolled my eyes and playfully punched his shoulder. looking around to see if i can find my other hyungs, i saw all of them resting around the room with at least some fan gifts around them. then my gaze slowly moved towards the door and i saw a black bag labelled seungyoon.

ah, those gifts must be mine, i smiled, it looked so fat.

walking over, i asked our manager.

" mine? " i pointed at the bag.
he smiled and nodded.
" go ahead and open it. your schedules are over for the day. "
i raised my eyebrows.
" really? what about the photoshoot we were supposed to do at about 7pm later? " i asked.
" ah, it got postponed to next week. now shoo shoo, go rest or open your letters, " he took a bottle of water and walked out of the room.

dragging the bag to a corner, i sat down beside it and pulled it open.

" wow.. where should i start? "

i put my hand in and reached for a letter.
i gently opened it.

dear seungyoon oppa,
thank you for being such a great leader and taking care of winner oppas. i love winner's music and i will forever be an incle ♡ see you soon at the next fansign!
with love,
lee seoyeon

aww, fans like this really make my heart warm.
they let me know that they appreciate me, and it keeps me going. i put the letter back into the envelope and put it aside.

i put my hand in and reached around.
jar? why do i feel a jar?
i pulled it out, stucked to it was a letter and another hard object.
" oh? this looks familiar, who was it from again?? " scratching my head, i pulled the letter off from the jar and opened it.

hello seungyoon!
it's my first time being able to write a letter to you and i sincerely hope you will get to read it because i know you are really busy.

i just want to thank you for being the person you are, so kind, charming and sweet. to us fans, to your members and to people around you. you bring so much joy and happiness into my life that sometimes it's be a little hard to imagine if i hadn't got to know winner. your voice, whether you are singing or talking, never fails to make me smile and feel calm and that means alot to me.

here are some gifts for you, i gave you a jar of stars that i folded piece by piece awhile ago wishing you good health and all the best in whatever you do. together with the jar of stars is a notebook that i bought awhile back. it has a similar design to the book i hold close to my heart, my diary. so i thought i'd give this to you. i hope you like it!

if you ever want a listening ear,
here's my number hehe although you probably won't want to, but here it is anyway.

xx-xxxx-xxxx

thank you for existing. ♡
-ahn aeri.

aeri?? who was aeri again?

ohh.
ah, aeri.
that shy girl.

i tore the wrapping paper open to look at the notebook. there was a blue heart infront of a white notebook. so cute! maybe i can use it as my diary since her similar one is her diary? haha.

flipping it open, my eyebrows raised.

' this is ahn aeri's diary!
DO NOT touch it unless you are 강승윤!
please return it to me too if found, PLSPLSPLS.
it is private and confidential. '

[ a/n!! - 강승윤 is Kang SeungYoon ]

huh? what?
i flipped to the first page.

dear seung,
hello diary! this is officially my first entry in this book. i'm going to name you seung okay? i hope i'll write in you diligently to remember all my memories. till next time!
— aeri, 0102

" jinwoo hyung! " i shouted for him across the room.

he looked up at me.
" can you come over for awhile? "
putting down the letter he was currently holding, he nodded and made his way over.

" yes? " he sat down beside me.

i passed the letter and book to him

" look at this. this fan, aeri, she said she wanted to give me this, i suppose it's supposed to be empty? "

jinwoo looked at the first entry written, then the letter, then he looked back at me.

" uhh. maybe you flip to the middle? see if she wrote anything there, " i nodded and took the book back.

dear seung,
today was a bad day. i fell in the school canteen and everyone laughed at me. luckily hanni came in time to pick me up or else i might really become the laughing stock of the year ;-;
— aeri, 0402

" who's hanni? " jinwoo asked, peeking over.

" how am i supposed to know? " i looked at him. " i am literally as confused as you are, "

" what's going on? why do you both look so interested in a book? " seunghoon came over with mino and sat around me.

" hyung, one of the fans that came earlier, she gave me some stuff and... here it is. "
i passed the book to mino.

he flipped to the very first page.

" oh wow, she said that no one else other than you can open it, is this her diary or what?" mino shrugged his shoulders in confusion and passed the book to seunghoon who was pestering him to get a closer look.

seunghoon opened the book and saw a completely new entry that i haven't seen, with a photo pasted beside the entry.

dear seung,
here's the first picture i took with my new camera. it's a scenery at the nearby beach. is it nice? i finally saved enough money to get myself a new camera! hopefully it'll come into good use when i finally can meet winner ♡
— aeri, 0605

" why does she start with seung? is this supposed to be a book of letters to both of us? " seunghoon asked.

mino playfully punched him.
" this book was clearly for yoonie, if it was for you two i'm pretty sure she would have stated, " mino laughed and seunghoon rolled his eyes.

seunghoon picked up a photo fallen on the floor.
" hey! i remember her! " i took the photo from seunghoon.
it was a girl with wavy black hair, smiling happily at the camera with a peace sign.

" she played some pick up line joke on me earlier, and it was really funny, " seunghoon smiled, remembering aeri.

" here, take this. does she seem familiar? " he passed the photo to me.

jinwoo and mino both squeezed beside me to peep at the photo.

" ah, i think she looks familiar, " jinwoo said and mino and i nodded.

" i remember her being really shy, " mino laughed.

seunghoon returned the closed book to me and i slotted the photo back into the book.

" so, um, what do you guys think? "

" yoonie, actually i think, " jinwoo pointed at the book.

all of us turned to him immediately, eagerly waiting for what he has to say.

" let's not touch her book anymore okay? it's her privacy because uh, " he paused.

" i think she accidentally gave you her diary, "